Fighting Temptation
by ForeverTreasure
Summary: Two weeks before school started I met a guy. I spent the most amazing night of my life with him before I crept out of his bedroom early hours in the morning knowing I was never going to see him again… Boy was I wrong. On the bright side I have a new English teacher. I'll give you one guess as to who it is.
1. Chapter 1

**New story. I know I have a million unfinished ones but it's the reviews that encourage me to keep writing :) M for language and lemons.**

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Chapter One

I strolled down the nearly abandoned beach as the evening sun warmed my face, my bare toes burying in the sand – my heels in one hand and the part of my dress bunched in the other. My brown locks were falling from the up do hairstyle that my new step-mother wanted her bridesmaids to have so I took it down and my hair fell in waves like a waterfall, I pulled it to the side over one shoulder and gazed out at the sea.

Why everyone had left the beach I had no idea, it was the most beautiful time of day to come to the beach to watch the sunset, but it was nice to have it all to myself, aside from the few stragglers packing up their things and heading back to hotels and homes. I thanked the Lord none of my newfound family had decided to follow me out here.

My father had finally remarried after seventeen long years since his and my mother's divorce, and today, here on a beautiful Spanish island he and his fiancée – or wife now I suppose – got married.

I had a whole new family. Sue Clearwater, well, Swan I guess, had been a widow to one of my father's friends. She and her two children, Leah and Seth would be moving in with us.

I liked Seth, he was a good kid and at fifteen years old he still had some of his innocence left about him. Leah on the other hand was the same age as me, just a couple of months younger and I knew two eighteen-year-old girls living together was going to be a nightmare, especially when one of them clearly hated the other for no apparent reason.

Well, there may have been a tiny, little, itsy-bitsy reason as to why she loathed me but I was pretty sure she didn't know anything about that.

Yeah, it was pretty obvious as she scowled viciously at me from across my kitchen table that we weren't going to grow a new sort of sisterly bond any time soon.

Seth told me it was nothing personal, Leah wasn't looking forward to the idea of having a new sister or having a cop as a step-dad. I had to admit the whole cop thing was a downside; it had taken me years to perfect the skills it took for me to be able to do the shit I did right under Charlie's nose. It wasn't something you could teach.

Either way, personal or not, Leah didn't like me so I was more than happy to stay out of her way.

It wasn't like I gave a shit about what she, or anyone else for that matter, thought of me. She had just given me the perfect excuse to get out of the house more.

It was this exact excuse that had me out here now, strolling the beach alone in a long, purple halter-neck dress finally glad to be rid of the heels.

I didn't mind dressing up, but this really wasn't my style, I was more of a short skirts, tight jeans and small tops kind of girl.

Meh, I had the body. If you've got it, flaunt it - as my best friend Rose would say.

She too had a similar style but she liked to dress up in long ball gowns and uppity hair dos whenever she got the chance. Her theory was that I wasn't a fan because I had yet to meet somebody I wanted to dress up for, maybe she was right, but Rose loved to glam up both before and after she met the "love of her life" – a big bear of a football player who was the goofiest most lovable guy you could ever meet.

But she didn't love him. Rose may have thought she loved Emmett but she didn't. She was seventeen for crying out loud she didn't know what love was. I think Rose just liked the _idea_ of being in love rather than actually _being_ in love.

Anyway, the second I told her Charlie and Sue were getting married she was rummaging through her walk-in-closet squealing excitedly about how she could wear her new dress.

That dream crashed and burned pretty quickly when I gave her the news. Charlie and Sue wanted a small wedding with only immediate family, abroad. Yay.

My stunning model of a best friend sulked about that one for a week before Sue invited her to the hen-night, which actually turned out to be a spa weekend. Rosalie was in heaven and told me she was ready to marry Sue herself.

I, however, would have preferred a club and some shots and the odd stripper or two – but to each their own.

"Hi there." A smooth velvety voice made me jump and spin round. The dress, now way too long due to the absence of high heels, tangled around my feet and I felt myself beginning to fall. I shut my eyes and prepared to get soaked when strong, warm arms wrapped around me ceasing my ever so elegant fall from grace.

I felt rather than heard the beautiful chuckle rumbling in his chest and looked up to see the most beautiful sight on Earth.

If there were only ever two things in my life I would claim absolute certainty of it would be these two facts: this guy was not a high-school boy, he was man, all man, probably in his early to mid-twenties and fuck me sideways if I didn't find that attractive.

And second, this man was stunning. He was gorgeous. He was perfection. He was fucking sex on legs. He had smouldering green eyes and a sexy crooked smile that made my belly flip and coil. His mess of copper hair looked like he just got out of bed but in the most stylish way imaginable and blew gently in the breeze.

And here I was gaping at him like a fish out of water.

Brilliant.

I giggled breathlessly like a fucking giddy schoolgirl.

His smile widened as he gazed down at me with those panty-dropping glinting eyes, "You okay, beautiful?"

Shit. With a voice like that he could just read Rosalie's Vogue magazine aloud and _talk_ me to an orgasm.

I opened my mouth to answer, then I closed it and then I opened it…and then I nodded. Crap.

He chuckled again and my girl parts tingled.

"I…um, you can let go of me now." No. No that was not what I wanted.

"Oh," he laughed, "Sorry, about that."

I shook my head, "It's okay."

He bent down and picked up the shoes I had dropped and handed them to me.

"Thanks." I took them from him.

"You're welcome." He smiled and I wanted to rip his white cotton shirt off and see if his abs were as bangable-worthy as his face. "So what's your name?"

"Bella. Bella Swan."

"That's pretty. I'm Edward Cullen." He held out his hand and I had to restrain myself so I wouldn't launch myself at him.

I shook his hand and I bit my lip to stop a whimper from escaping. They were _good_ hands. Sexy hands. Big hands…you know what they say about hands…

"You're from the US." I stated more to distract myself than anything else but I wouldn't mind hearing his voice again.

He nodded, "You got me. I'm from Chicago."

I smiled, "Good movie."

He chuckled, "Yeah I guess, if you're into all that jazz."

I laughed once, shaking my head, "That was a terrible joke."

"What can I say?" He gave a half shrug, "Wasn't one of my best. You're making me nervous."

I raised an eyebrow sceptically.

"How could you not, you're absolutely beautiful. I should have you know I'm usually a very smooth talker, this doesn't normally happen to me."

I narrowed my eyes slightly and nodded, "Mmm, very modest too."

"Well, I don't usually have to point out all my good traits to girls but I'm feeling the need to impress you."

I played along, biting my lip. "How do I know this isn't what you do with all the girls? Claim naivety and have them fawning over your apparent vulnerability and sweetness?"

He held his hands up, "Aah, you got me."

I laughed and started to slowly walk across the shore.

"Hey, where are you going?" He called, jogging after me.

"Escaping your attempt at picking me up like all the other girls that have fallen victim to your predatory ways." Big fat liar. I'm playing hard to get and you are so totally fucking falling for it.

He laughed, "Mind if I walk with you?"

"Well, that really wouldn't be much of an escape plan now would it?" I smirked but nodded.

He smiled, "I guess not. So, what brings you out here dressed like you're heading for a ball?"

I quirked an eyebrow, "Flattery will get you no where Mr Cullen." Yes, yes it would.

He grinned, "Who said it was a compliment, I could have been implying how extremely overdressed you are for such a casual setting."

"Well in that case, I've just come from my father's wedding."

"Aah, so you're parents…"

"Divorced. A very long time ago."

"I see. Lived with your mom then?"

I shook my head, "Nope. She lives in Florida. We're not very close."

"I'm sorry to hear that." He frowned.

I shook my head with an easy smile and shrug. "There's nothing to be sorry for, she has her life and I have mine."

Edward smiled, "You're very selfless, Bella. I like that."

I smiled in return though it was a little strained. I never spoke about personal things with guys, or with anyone really, it was time for a topic change. "So what brings you out here dressed in what is apparently perfectly acceptable clothing for such a setting?"

He laughed, "Had to get away from my sister, she's driving me a little crazy at the moment."

"You here on holiday with her?"

He nodded, "Yeah, and a few friends. Just wanted a bit of time alone, you know."

"And yet you're stalking me." I gave him and teasing look.

He laughed loudly. "Yeah, I guess I am. Funny that."

I glanced at him in question.

He explained, "I came out here for some peace and quiet yet I feel totally content talking to you."

"Ditto." I winked.

Suddenly he dropped down onto the sand facing the sea and grabbed my hand, pulling me down with him making yelp.

"What the fuck was that?" I asked with a laugh.

"Potty mouth." He scolded but his eyes were burning with what could only be identified as lust, "Don't you want to watch the sunset?"

I righted myself so I was more comfortable. "Yes I did, but what happened to all that charm? Now you've got the girl you resort to throwing her on the floor instead of a candlelit picnic on the beach?" I teased.

Edward was grinning widely.

"What?" I asked.

"I've got the girl have I?" Though his eyes were teasing there was something in his voice and the way that he looked at me that made my girl parts wet with anticipation.

The air between us suddenly seemed to be alive with electricity and I wanted nothing more than to lean in and kiss him.

I wanted to know if his lips were as smooth at they looked. I wanted to run my hands through his hair and see if it was as soft as I thought it would be.

A tingling sensation ran through my body as I imagined what his hands would feel like in my own hair, on my waist, running up and down my sides, on the small of my back pulling me closer to him as our lips locked and his tongue begged for entrance. I could almost feel what his big hands would do to my body and my voice was husky with desire when I spoke softly.

"Well," I breathed as he leaned in closer though I didn't think it was consciously done, "I didn't quite mean it like that."

His eyes flickered from mine to where I was biting on my lower lip and his breathing hitched as he ran his tongue swiftly along his.

"When will I get the girl then?" He asked, exhaling a deep breath and I inhaled the mouth-watering scent of spearmint toothpaste with a hint of cigarettes and I knew I needed to taste him, to taste his lips.

"Hmm," I looked up, pretending to think about it and he smirked at my teasing, "Maybe you should kiss me, after all, you'll never get the girl if you're a bad kisser."

The second the words were out of my mouth his was pressed to mine and I moaned into the kiss, his lips were as smooth as I thought but he kissed me with rough and raw desire – the perfect combination. And he tasted so, so good.

He pressed more kisses to my lips asking between them, "So, did I make the cut?"

"No." Kiss. "You're a terrible kisser."

The chuckle at his lips hummed against my mouth and I whimpered as he took my face in his hands, running his fingers through my hair and cupped my neck with one, the other soothing circles into my cheek. My own hands shot into his hair, desperate to know if my prediction about his sexy soft hair was true. It was. It really, really was. I should become a fucking psychic.

I sucked on his gorgeous and begging-to-be-kissed-lower-lip, running my tongue back and forth until he opened his mouth granting me entrance. I couldn't help the moan that escaped me when his tongue touched mine shooting tingles down my body to my wet core. He pulled away and I had to stop myself from whining in protest.

I gasped breathlessly, tugging at his bronze locks to bring his mouth back to mine.

"Terrible kisser?" He breathed, "I beg to differ."

I rolled my eyes and caught his grin before I crashed my lips back to his running my nails through the hair at the nape of his neck eliciting a groan that made my stomach coil.

Reluctantly I pulled away a little, sucking in deep, gasping breaths of air, panting with lust as he moved the kisses along my jaw and to my neck as one hand slipped to my back, pulling me closer, the other moving along my waist. My own gripped the collar of his shirt bringing him as close to me as possible my eyes rolling as his lips and tongue worked magic just above my collarbone.

I needed him. I needed to feel his hands lower, I needed them on my bare skin I needed to feel him. Fucking right now. And though I was no virgin and had "done the deed" in many different and bizarre places I wasn't prepared to do this on a very open and public beach.

"E-Edward." I gasped, swallowing down a moan as he nipped at my neck. "We…we need to…oh fuck, we need to stop."

He pulled back sharply, "Bella, shit, I'm sorry, I don't usually do this sort of thing this isn't like me, we can stop if you want. Fuck, I'm sorry I…"

"No, Edward, stop." I placed my hand over his mouth to stop his rambling, "I meant we can't exactly do this here." I glanced around and he followed my gaze to the old couple – with grandchildren – who kept glaring at us disapprovingly, and the other stragglers scattered along the beach.

"Oh, right," he chuckled sheepishly, smiling at me. He gave me what I supposed was meant to be a chaste kiss that very quickly turned into more when his tongue brushed mine before standing and taking my hand to pull me up. "Come on, I've got the hotel room to myself tonight, it's just further up the beach." He winked and I grinned, forever fucking grateful for the closeness of the hotel as he tugged at my hand and we jogged, laughing, to the closest bed available.

After we stood waiting for the elevator for far too long and had had enough of the disgruntled stares from other hotel guests as our hands wandered and our lips locked in a not very polite kiss for public eye – to which I asked them sweetly, "Never seen a horny couple before?" and Edward howled with laughter – we rushed to the stairs and sprinted up three flights before Edward lifted me bridal style in his arms and ran up another two until we finally reached his room, panting for air and smothering each others laughter with desperate kisses.

Then his fucking card-key for the door wouldn't work.

"You're useless!" I mock shouted with a laugh as I took the card from him and fitted it into the slot in the door. He wrapped his arms around my waist kissing my neck and pressed his arousal into my ass. I whimpered as I waited for the little light on the handle to turn green and Edward grazed his teeth along my ear lobe making shudder.

"Yes!" We cried as the light buzzed green and I slammed the handle down and we tumbled inside.

I spun round, throwing my arms around his neck as our mouths connected in a passionate and hungry kiss. He crouched down a little, bending his knees never breaking the kiss and ran his deliciously slightly rough hands up my legs, lifting my dress as he went before lifting me and hitching my legs around his waist and slamming my back against the door with a groan.

The fly of his green khaki shorts rubbed against my, unfortunately, covered core as I rocked my hips against his seeking out the pressure and oh so good friction. He bit back a groan and smashed his mouth to mine roughly, our tongues stroking and thrusting against one another as though hinting at what was to come. I couldn't help the whimper of anticipation at the thought and became quickly impatient.

I ran my hands over his hard shoulders and down his chest to the buttons of his shirt, but my fingers were trembling with the wanton lust pulsing through my body so I yanked hard and the sound of buttons pinging and bouncing against the wooden floor in the dark as they flew in different directions sounded throughout the room.

"Fuck!" Edward all but shouted and he thrust his arousal into me harder, "That was so fucking hot!" He gasped between desperate kisses and rushed us through another door before placing me gently on my feet.

My hands when straight to his shirt and started pulling it from his shoulders as his hands went for the zipper on the back of my dress.

Hallelujah! Praise the fucking Lord! I wanted to get on my knees and bow down to him – for this specimen of a man was a pure God! His chest and abs were chiselled to perfection, and though I wasn't particularly religious, I now believed there was some higher power out there, for there was no other explanation for this man. I almost came from the sight of the light dusting of a small snail trail from his belly button leading downwards towards his khaki shorts to the treasures hidden beneath.

I attacked him, covering him in open-mouthed kisses, my tongue licking at his collarbone down his sexy-as-hell chest to his abs.

I straightened to press my lips to his own, our tongues fighting together for dominance, as I fumbled with the fly of his shorts and he slipped the halter neck over my head.

I shimmied the dress down my body as he guided me backwards, neither one of us daring to break the kiss.

As Edward was sufficiently distracted, I spun us round and pushed him onto the bed as I stepped out of the dress, standing above him in the black, lacy strapless bra that did wonders for my boobs, and matching boyshorts.

I could almost see his arousal throb under his shorts as he swallowed thickly, his eyes wide and gaping.

"Like what you see?" I purred seductively

He shook his head as though trying to snap himself back into reality. I smiled thinking, honey I know exactly how you feel.

"You're so fucking sexy, baby." He murmured, his voice was husky and making my panties damp, as he ravaged me with his eyes.

"That doesn't answer my question," I breathed and knelt my left knee beside his right leg on the bed, my left arm leaning on his bare shoulder – my hand scratching the hair at the nape of his neck. I trailed my other along his jaw, down his neck, stroking down his chest and along his abs to rub against the hardness in his shorts. "But this does."

"Ffffuck. Me." He groaned and buried his face in my breasts, kissing and nipping gently in ways that made me want to scream with pleasure. His hands ran up and down my sides and I lifted my other leg so I was straddling him.

"Don't worry," I whispered in his ear, "I plan to."

I pushed him backwards to lie down and his hands went to my ass, squeezing and kneading as I rocked my wet panties against the throbbing in his shorts. He slid his hands up my back to the clasp of my bra and pulled it off, throwing it across the room, moaning at the slight of my bare chest. He lifted his head, pulling a nipple into his mouth making me gasp breathlessly.

I both heard and felt the vibration as he chuckled at my reaction.

I scowled and worked my own hand past his shorts and into his boxers to grasp his pulsing cock and giving it a few pleasurable tugs.

He grunted in both surprise and desire, his hips bucking before he got control over himself.

He looked up to see my smug expression and rolled his eyes with a sexy-as-fuck smirk before taking me by surprise and rolling us over so I was underneath him. From this position we were both able to get rid of each other's last items of offending clothing before he reached his hand down and his fingers met slickness. He groaned, "Baby, you're so wet for me."

"You have no idea," I murmured, my voice strained as I bucked my hips and his hardness slipped between my folds creating the most marvellous friction known to man. And a frenzy began.

"Condom?" Edward gasped frantically, not even bearing to part his lips from the hollow under my ear that made me squirm in delight.

"Pill." I breathed, "You clean?"

He nodded moaning against my skin, "I swear. You?"

I too, nodded the affirmative, my eyes closing involuntarily as he sucked on that amazing point of my neck, "I trust you." And fuck knows why but I did.

It seemed neither of us could take it anymore, Edward slammed his mouth to mine, our tongues moulding together perfectly as he guided himself into me making us both gasp out loud at the sensation.

"Fuck!" I cried out, "Move Edward, please." I couldn't help myself grasping his fuck-me-sideways bed head hair…now sex hair…needing something to grab onto as he thrust his hips, rubbing against my clit as he did so. But he didn't seem to mind, in fact he growled in pleasure and his movements became more erratic.

"So tight," he panted breathlessly into my ear, which combined with all the other amazing reactions he was causing in my body, made me shiver. "So good. Shit, baby, you're incredible."

If it had been possible for me to coherently speak at that moment in time I would have told me likewise, I would have told him he was a fucking God, because never in my entire sexually active life had any guy made me scream like I did he hit a spot inside me that had never been reached before.

"Holy shitting hell, there, right there! Please, don't stop!" I never wanted it to stop. I had never felt that kind of pleasure before and Jesus Christ I swear I would die if he ever stopped.

He hit the spot again and again as I eagerly thrust my hips up to meet him each time before my back arched, my mouth opened in a fucking silent scream. And before my eyes slammed shut of their own accord due to the ecstasy that was rushing through my body I saw Edward reach his own climax with me and his sparkling green eyes, full of pleasure and something like awe, met mine as he grunted so fucking sexily and buried his face in my neck I almost had an orgasm on top of a freaking orgasm.

And then there was bliss.

Sweet, quiet, sated bliss.

And it was beautiful.

The only sound throughout the room was our heavy breathing as we came down from our high and I had never felt more comfortable than I did then, with Edward's weight covering my body his warm skin dusted with sweat, flush against my own. My hand tangled in his hair at the nape of his neck and I felt his own fingers running smooth circles into my hip.

After a few minutes of basking in the satisfaction of the indescribable sex we had just had, Edward lifted his head and looked down at me with a slightly goofy yet still devastatingly sexy crooked smile on his face. He let out a soft chuckle of what seemed to be amazement, his eyes raking over me before he murmured a still slightly breathless, "Wow."

I chuckled, "I know." Damn this man was beautiful. He totally had the "deliciously fucked" look going for him, the ends of his hair slightly damp with exertion, his muscular chest still heaving a little, his eyes bright and his defined cheekbones a little flushed. But who the hell was I kidding? This guy had any and every look going for him.

"That was…"

"Indescribable? Fucking amazeballs? The very definition of ecstasy? The most incredible sex you've ever had in your life I've ruined you for all other women and will now have to resort to batting for the other team because no other female, living or dead, could ever give you that sort of pleasure again?"

The look on his face, his eyes wide and shocked, his mouth agape was freaking hilarious and he burst into laughter shortly after I did.

"I was going to say mind-blowing but yours works too." He grinned between chuckles. "But, the last one may be a little exaggerated if not slightly inaccurate."

"Slightly inaccurate?" My eyebrow arched in question.

Edward leaned down and peppered kisses all over my mouth, "Well, I'm not too sure about batting for the other team but you may have achieved ruining me for all other women."

"Hmm," I murmured, moulding my lips to his and rolling us so I was on top of him. "How about you let me attempt to prove the last one true?"

Edward's eyes rolled and he groaned as I kissed my way down his chest and snail trail, lower and lower. "That may take a while – ah!" He gasped as I awoke the not-so-little "Little Edward".

"We have all night, baby."

I grinned when I heard a low moan of approval above me.

***FT***

I was warm and relaxed and content.

I frowned.

There were large, comforting arms wrapped around me.

I wearily opened one eye slowly.

Shit a fucking brick.

I opened the other.

This. Was. Not. Good.

The sun was shining through the cracks in the curtains, which were swaying gently in the warm breeze coming from the open window. The arms of the most beautiful naked man and very definition of sex itself were wrapped around my own very naked self, spooning and I felt blissfully content. To any other person this would be a delight to wake up to. For me to wake up to this meant I was up shits creek.

I never, ever fell asleep with the guys I had sex with – it wasn't me, it wasn't what I did. It was too personal, the morning after encounters were always awkward and I'd rather avoid the painful situation altogether.

Sleeping together was fine, it was simple, it was easy, if was freaking mother nature. _Sleeping _together on the other hand, and spooning for that matter, was an altogether completely different thing, it would lead to "call me"s and dates which then lead to serious which would inevitably lead to messy and complicated and that just wasn't shit that I wanted to deal with. Therefore, my solution was easy – you sleep with a guy, you have some fun that you both enjoy and may be worth something to brag about later (though in many cases that would not be the case), you wait for the dude to fall asleep then you get the hell out of there, leaving the pair of you both sated and on his part – leaving you in almost dreamlike part of his brain, a distant memory of the mysterious girl who once rocked his world.

So this shit wasn't good. And I felt weird. I felt a tingling sensation all over my body because of the arms wrapped around me, and the tingling didn't have anything to do with lust. I felt like I just wanted to stay there, like I could just close my eyes and happily fall asleep right there and then, I didn't understand, it was confusing me and that was freaking me the hell out.

Edward started to stir behind me. Thank fuck he didn't wake up but his arms pulled me closer to his chest and tightened around me. The realisation that this didn't make me uncomfortable was the motivation to get the fuck out as quickly and as quietly as possible.

It scared the fucking shit out of me when I looked back at the peacefully sleeping Edward, stood by the door in yesterdays outfit and sex hair enacting the oh so familiar walk of shame, I felt a tightening in my chest as I realised this was the last time I was ever going to see him.

I sprinted out the door not daring to look back again.

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**I've never written a Bella quite like this before so I'm hoping the characterisation is being portrayed okay. Anyways, let me know what you think!**

**Review :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**It has been ages, but here is the second chapter. Hope you like it.**

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Chapter Two

"Oh my god! Get over here, biatch!" Was the squealing that reached my ears the second I stepped out of my truck and into the parking lot.

It was the first day of school, once again, and if my double trig lesson this morning wasn't going to kill me, then Rosalie was.

Said best friend and soon to be murderer was torn between hugging the shit out of me and beating the shit out of me and until she was one hundred percent decided I was going to keep a cautious distance.

"Sorry," I called over my shoulder as I passed her, "I'm late for trig."

I felt a yank on my hand and was spun round to face her. She frowned at me, staring.

"What?" I asked.

"You got something right there." She tapped at her own chin and I scrubbed quickly at mine thinking of the bacon and eggs I'd eaten not fifteen minutes ago.

"What is it?"

"Bit of your breakfast…bullshit, I believe."

I dropped my hand and rolled my eyes, turning away again before she pulled me back.

"Stop it," I snapped, "I'm not a fucking ragdoll."

"You will be once I've finished with you."

"What does that even mean?"

"Dunno. But the real question is, why the hell haven't you called me since you got back?"

"Charlie took my cell." It was an easy lie. This was Charlie's favourite punishment and as I was constantly sneaking around doing crap behind his back I rarely had my phone on me. But if he knew everything that I did I wouldn't have my truck let alone my cell and I would probably have a lock on my bedroom door and bars on my window. Rosalie knew this and she would have taken my word for it if the damn phone hadn't started ringing in my pocket.

_Woop, woop  
__That's the sound of da police  
__Woop, woop  
__That's the sound of the beast._

I gave Rose a sheepish smile, "Better get that. Charlie." I whipped out my iPhone and took the call. "Hi dad, you know, you really shouldn't be calling me when I'm in school. What's up?"

Rosalie gave a very undignified derisive snort at my good-girl act and I shoved her as we made our way towards the entrance of Forks High School.

"Sorry, Bells. Just letting you know that you need to give Seth a ride home." Came Charlie's voice.

I frowned. "Why can't Leah?"

"She's got cheerleading practice or something."

I rolled my eyes then smirked at Rose who was head cheerleader or some shit and wasn't a fan of Leah's. "Fine, no problem." It really wasn't, I liked Seth, it was his sister I wanted to run down with my truck.

"Okay, thanks, see you tonight."

"Oh wait, dad," this was the perfect moment to ask, "can I sleep at Rosalie's tonight?"

Rose turned to face me as we stopped at my locker, grinning. It wasn't a complete lie, I would be sleeping at Rosalie's…after Mike Newton's house party – his parents were always off hiking and shit and considering it was the first day back they were probably still camping on a mountain somewhere.

"Hmm…I'm not sure Bella." I could practically feel his distaste radiating through the phone. "It's a school night."

"Please dad, we won't be doing much. Just catching up, watch a few chick flicks-" I almost gagged and Rose laughed, "- eat popcorn and sleep."

"Really? You girls won't be going to that Newton kid's party?"

What. The. Fuck. "No dad, I didn't know he was having a party. How did you?"

"Leah told me." Bitch. "And the answers no, sorry. See you at dinner."

I shoved my cell into the pocket of my short shorts with a huff and slammed my fist against the door of my locker, it swung open.

"How did he-"

"Leah," I growled at Rosalie. "Bitch knew I wanted to be at that party. Oh, and FYI, she's cheerleading this year."

"Ugh, why? That girl is about as flexible as a hard on."

"And doesn't Jake know it." I smirked.

"Bella!" Rose gasped before laughing her ass off. "That's so bad."

I shrugged, "Truth hurts, baby."

"So why'd she rat you out?"

I stared at the blonde super model in front of me wondering if she was as airheaded as she looked. "Okay, Rose," I said slowly with a soothing tone you'd use when talking to someone mentally ill, "if you don't know the answer to that question I suggest you see a doctor."

She rolled her eyes at me, "Well, it's not like she knows about that. And I mean, if she's cheerleading this year its practically her party." That was true. This party was like a "Go Spartans" for those douche jocks and prissy cheerleaders – no offense to Rosalie, but let's be honest now, if she and I had met today rather than when we were five years old then I doubt we would still be friends.

"She probably fed some bullshit story to her mom who took her word for it then told Charlie just so I couldn't go. Like she would want me there."

"Bella, you've been at this party since Freshman year, this is her first, you have more of a right to be there than she does, cheerleader or not."

"Whatever. Looks like I'll be climbing through my bedroom window tonight."

"I'll be waiting for you on the street corner."

"Whore."

"Back at ya."

Two big bear arms suddenly wrapped around Rose and lifted her off her feet making her squeal in surprise and then pleasure.

"Hey baby." Emmett grinned, before he sucked her lips off her face.

"I'm gonna leave you guys to it." They hadn't seen each other all summer meaning that this reunion was not something I wanted to witness. And it was time to make a quick getaway. Not only did I _not_ want to see Rose and Emmett do something that could potentially scar me for life but I had also made it this far without Rose bringing up the whole "why didn't you call me" thing again.

It wasn't that I hadn't wanted to see her or talk to her it was just…the girl knew me way too well for my liking, she would have known something was wrong and recently, not much had been right. Not since I'd had the most amazing sex of my life with the most bangable, gorgeous, beautiful specimen of a man who, for some godforsaken reason, would not get out of my fucking head. I didn't think of guys again after I'd slept with them, the majority of them weren't even worth remembering but I couldn't just forget about this one and it was killing me. There was something seriously wrong with me and I'd had to sort myself out before I saw or spoke to Rosalie again. I knew that I had to get over whatever the hell this was and I knew exactly the way to do it. This was one of the reasons I had to be at Mike's party tonight.

"Nice shirt, Bells." Emmett called as I walked away.

I grinned and lifted my leg, "How d'you think I got these beauties?"

The heels of my cowboys boots tapped as I strutted down the corridor and I felt half the schools population staring at the swaying of my hips and down my tanned legs, and I'm pretty sure some of the girls' as well – I swear that Lauren bitch was trying way too hard to stop Tyler Crowley and me from getting it on at last years first-day-back-at-school-party, he was totally her beard, not that he knew it…and she was unsuccessful.

Alec, who was stood at his locker right outside our trig class prolonging actually entering the room, eyed my top then sent me a wink, "Hey, Bella."

Been there, done that, never going back again. It was clear to me and every other girl he had been with why he could get girls – his looks were really working for him – but couldn't keep them. He was a more of a wham-bam-thank you mam, kind of dude.

Poor guy.

But it seemed that my taste in clothes wasn't as appreciated by the teachers – the female ones anyway – as by my fellow classmates. I watched as my trig teacher read my shirt then swallowed thickly, I didn't miss the way his eyes darted towards my shoes then worked their way up my legs. Dirty old man. He had to be about fifty, and he was married.

My Spanish teacher, Mrs Goff, was "absolutely appalled at my audacity" and I landed myself in an afterschool detention on the first day back. But I wriggled myself out of it, Seth needed a ride home after all, so it was postponed until tomorrow, what fun.

It was lunch that was a lot more dramatic though, more dramatic than the Forks High School cafeteria had ever seen.

I sashayed over to a table that consisted of Rosalie, Emmett and a couple of their friends, placed my tray down and pulled out my iPod as I took a bite of an apple. Not a verse in the earphone was yanked out of my ear and Rosalie was hissing in it, Jessica Stanley grinning in the seat opposite. I arched an eyebrow and Jessica looked away blushing. Apparently she was intimidated by me, in her eyes I was a "'ARD scary ass bitch with the body to flaunt for America" – Rose assured me they were Jessica's words, not hers. Once I had gained this little delightful piece of information it was fun to mess around with sometimes, especially if Jessica was being her whiny annoying self. All I had to do was throw her a look and she'd be running as fast as she could a mile in the opposite direction.

"What?" I asked Rose.

"Did you hear about the new English teacher?"

I saw Emmett huff and roll his eyes before joining some other jock in their conversation about who's dick was bigger, or who scored the most chicks during summer, or who got the most wasted – you know, jock stuff.

"No, what happened to Mr Berty?"

"Fired apparently, I wonder why." The sarcasm was rich in her voice. He was the worst English teacher ever. Not only could he not control the class but he also didn't know anything about English Literature. He had spent all my freshman year telling us about how this amazing author, Elizabeth Bennett, had written these marvellous novels, such as Pride and Prejudice and Sense and Sensibility. It wasn't until the end of the year that someone decided to point out the fact that her name was Jane Austen and Elizabeth Bennett was one of her characters. The idiot decided to go for the, "I was testing you all" line. Yeah, no wonder he was fired.

"But that is totally not the point." Rose interrupted my musings.

"What, pray tell, is the point?" I wanted to plug my earphones back in before my brain was turned to mush as I overheard Newton complaining – "I told her she had a nice ass and she _still_ wouldn't have sex with me". I glanced over at Jessica who was crushing on the guy and stared at with a look that said _seriously?!_

"The point, Bella, is that the new teacher is hot. Like, really hot." Rosalie continued.

"And he's really young. I overheard Mr Greene telling Mrs Goff that he just got out of college but he hired him anyway because he was so passionate about English." Jessica piped in, giddy with the revelation.

Rose nodded. "Yeah, so that makes him like, twenty-three, twenty-four?"

I shrugged, "I guess."

She frowned, "Why are you not at all excited by this?"

I laughed, "Why are _you_ excited by this? Don't you have a boyfriend?"

"Yes. Yes she does." Emmett said pointedly, not happy with his girlfriend's mooning.

"Oh, relax," Rose flipped her blonde locks over her shoulder, "It's just a little fantasising, it's not like I'm gonna scream his name out while we're having sex."

I laughed, "Feeling a little insecure, Em?"

"No," he grouched.

"You know, it's always those that are feeling guilty who accuse others of carrying out their own wrongdoings. Whose name have you been shouting out during sex, Emmett?" I smirked.

Rose glared at me while Emmett glared at her, both angry for their secret being revealed.

I decided to milk it. "When Harry Met Sally is probably one of the most romantic movies ever. Meg Ryan is a phenomenal actress, don't you think Em? Her little orgasm scene was pretty hot and heavy, mind you, what with her age and all she's probably got _loads_ of…_experience_."

"Rosie!" Emmett wailed.

"Thanks, slutface." Rosalie hissed before turning to console Emmett. "Baby, it doesn't matter Bella knows, she won't tell anyone."

I tuned the couple out when Rose started making suggestions as to how she was going to make it up to him – re-enacting that scene being one of them.

"So what's this new English teacher's name?"

Jessica opened her mouth to answer when a scathing voice behind turned my attention away from her.

"Typical Bella Swan, fawning over something that she can't have."

I sighed heavily as I faced Leah, "You really need to let go, Leah. Learn to relax, to not be so frigid and uptight. Guys don't like that, trust me."

"I will fuck for shoes?" She read my shirt, "Well ain't that the truth. And at least I don't open my legs to anything that has a pulse. Guys don't like STD infected whores, trust me."

"Jake did." Fuck my life. I did not just say that. I take it back, I'm dragging my words back with my hands, throwing them down my throat and swallowing them.

"You bitch!" She shrieked, storming towards me. Nope, words were still there, hanging like a fucking banner in front of Leah.

"Leah, chill out, I was kidding." I held my hands up in surrender.

"Kidding?" She looked confused for a second before disbelief fell across her features and she scoffed ludicrously, "You thought I didn't know? Why the hell do you think we broke up?"

"Honestly? I thought he dumped your ass because he was tired of blue balls."

She looked like a deranged animal as she flew towards me and I would have been on the floor in stiches if she hadn't been running straight at me like a fucking mental patient on Red Bull.

So I threw the first thing that came to hand. My mac and cheese. What can I say? It worked.

Leah came to a screeching halt before her mouth opened and a piercing shriek sounded throughout the room that would have shattered windows and made dogs bark. She grabbed a chocolate pudding from her friend's tray beside her and launched it at me. I ducked. It hit Rose. Emmett jumped onto the table with a slice of pizza in his hand.

"FOOD FIGHT!" He yelled.

Oh shit.

I grabbed my bag and ran, crouched, towards the doors, proud to say I didn't even get a flick of food in my hair.

I chuckled to myself as I made my way to the back of the gym, pulling out a pack of cigarettes as I went.

_I'm a Barbie girl  
__In a Barbie World  
__Imagination  
__Life is your creation_

"Yes, Rosalie?" I asked as I brought the phone to my ear.

"Don't you 'yes Rosalie' me. Where the fuck are you? You better not have ditched without me, it's your fault I have fucking chocolate pudding in my hair."

"Back of the gym, and I've got to give Seth a ride haven't I? I'm not just going to leave him stranded on his first day of high school."

"Bella, this is Forks, he wouldn't exactly be stranded."

"Whatever, I'm not ditching, I've got English next, I'm going to meet Mr McHottie."

***FT***

I dumped my bag at my feet as I dropped myself behind a desk near the middle of the English classroom. Didn't want to look too eager, I wasn't that desperate, especially when there was no way in hell, no matter how hot he was, that I could actually get it on with a teacher. Besides, half the seats at the front were taken up by girls who were fixing their make-up and fluffing their hair while casting excited glances towards the door. Then there were a few unfortunate girls who came rushing into the class and hid themselves away in the back corners – obviously having been victims of lunch time's food fight. The boys came strutting in cockily like they were ready to compete with Forks High's supposed hottest teacher.

My phone chimed and I reached down to get it from my bag. I smirked at Rosalie's text when a hush fell over the class.

_Leah's in the heads office, in trouble for food fight. Just a heads up she's probably ratting on your ass right now. R-x _

I typed a quick reply as I heard the scraping of chalk across the board and a few giggles coming from the front of the class.

_Bitch can tattle on me all she likes, not my fault she attacked me, self-defence. Would totally hold up in court. B-x_

I put my phone back in my bag and pulled out my notebook and a pen and looked up to be met with a gorgeous behind, an oddly familiar head of hair and a name written across the blackboard.

Coincidence. That's all it was. Loads of people probably had that last name. Loads of people could have that uniquely coloured and perfect disarray of sex hair. There are billions of people in the world, what were the chances of _him _being my new English teacher? He lived in Chicago for fuck sake. Out of the thousands of people out there looking for a job teaching English the probability of Mr Greene hiring the man I had slept with two weeks ago, in a foreign country might I add, had to be so fucking slim that the line was indistinguishable. There was _no way_; there was just _no fucking way._

These thoughts rushed through my mind at the speed of light and as he turned, and those emerald green eyes that had been haunting me for the past two weeks locked with mine, I had to admit it.

The impossible had happened.

Here he was. My beautiful, gorgeous stranger who had evoked feelings in me that just weren't in my capacity to feel, sex God, master of female orgasms, champion of smooth talkers and charm with a voice that caressed my name like a feather, hero of hair, six pack and lickable chest, wizard of making himself impossible to forget, Edward Cullen…was here.

He was standing right in front of me, mouth agape, looking as shocked as I felt, in my English classroom, at Forks High School, in Forks, Washington.

In my dumbfounded state for some reason the one thought that rushed through my mind right after "shitting hell" was: Jessica's going to have a bitch fit if she ever finds out I fucked our super hot English teacher before she even got to see him.

The rest of the lesson passed by in a blur. Once Edward…or Mr Cullen, had his flabbergasted state under control he went on to explain to us the curriculum for this year, what books we would be studying blah blah blah. I couldn't really tell what he said but I subconsciously must have been listening because I looked down to see a full page of notes, this was good, this told me I was looking politely interested and acceptably indifferent on the outside. On the inside I was screaming.

I tried as hard as I could to stop myself from staring and I succeeded for the most part, but I couldn't help glancing up at him in his sexy ass shirt and tie, his sleeves rolled up. It didn't help either that he kept running his hands through his hair, clearly feeling frustrated and at a complete loss as to how to handle the situation, but holy shit it was sexy.

It was fifteen minutes before the bell for next period when he finally looked in my direction. The rest of the class were answering some sort of question – not a clue what – when I looked up and his green eyes were staring right at me. I could see the confusion and panic in them, the conflict and I knew I had to get out of there right that second. I couldn't stay in that room with him another minute. I felt hopeless, like there wasn't a solution for the situation and the fact that I, myself, felt conflicted told me that I didn't want to go with the first option, the obvious option, the only option really. It told me that I didn't want to ignore the fact that we had a previous relationship no matter how brief, and if the ache I had been feeling for two weeks – which had now intensified – was anything to go by, I wanted to do it again.

My saviour came in the form of Mrs Cope, the receptionist with a, "Sorry to interrupt Mr Cullen-" it was so weird hearing that, "-but the principle would like to see Isabella Swan."

I all but jumped out of my seat, ignoring the "oooh" from my classmates and headed quickly towards the door. If only I had actually made it _out_ of the door.

"You'll need to bring your things, dear. I doubt you'll be back in time to finish this lesson."

Fuck you, Mrs Cope. I had to pass by Edward to get back to my seat to collect my things and the scent of cologne and cigarettes and Edward made me want to curl up into a ball and just whimper. I heard him inhale a sharp intake of air as I passed by him again and saw his hands clench by his sides. Fuck.

Mrs Cope mistook my quiet mood and the biting of my lip to be nervousness about being sent to the principle's office.

"Mr Greene would like to see you about the incident at lunch, but don't worry, dear, I doubt he will be too harsh on you as it's the first day back. I would suggest, however, that tomorrow you wear something a little more…polite." She smiled warmly at me as though she was doing me a big favour by giving me this invaluable bit of advice. I just nodded to her as she opened the door of Mr Greene's office for me and shut it behind her as she left for her post at the desk.

"Miss Swan, if you would care to take a seat." Mr Greene said in a bored tone. I guess I would have been bored if I were in his position and had to see my face in his office, once again. "So, your sister tells me you began the food fight this afternoon."

"Step-sister." I muttered.

"I'm sorry?"

"Apology accepted."

He sighed heavily, "Back chat will not be tolerated, Miss Swan. Now would you care to tell me why you felt obliged to throw food at Miss Clearwater?"

I shrugged, "She was about to attack me, sir. She just came running at me."

"Why would Miss Clearwater want to do something like that?"

"We're 'sisters' as you put it, sir. It's what sisters do."

"'Attack' each other without motivation?"

"Leah loathes me on the best of days, what the cafeteria witnessed today was practically sisterly bonding."

Mr Greene rubbed his temples tiredly and chose to move on, "Mrs Goff was not at all impressed with your attire today, nor were many other members of the staff. It is disrespectful, Miss Swan, to yourself, your peers and your teachers. It would be much appreciated if you chose something more appropriate to wear to school."

"And if I have no other clothes that wouldn't be deemed offensive, sir?"

"Then I suggest you go shopping."

"Is that all, sir? It's just, I wouldn't want to be late for Gym." I was tired of this conversation, I had some serious planning to do and this was wasting my time.

With another exasperated sigh Mr Greene said, "You are to serve your afterschool detention tomorrow and I want to hear no more bad word of you, Miss Swan, from your teachers, siblings or otherwise. Is that clear?"

"Crystal." I hopped up from the seat across from the principle and was halfway out the door when he called, "And make sure you do _get_ to Gym, Miss Swan, we wouldn't want you to be side-tracked now, would we?"

"Never, sir." I called over my shoulder. It wasn't a lie. I was going to Gym, I was good at Gym and right now, in my stressed and frazzled frame of mind, Gym was exactly what I needed.

It was just my luck that Edward was helping Coach Clapp get the guys into shape for football. As soon as I stepped out onto the field with Rose at my side I tried to rush back in the direction of the changing rooms.

"What are you doing?" she grabbed my arm and pulled me back to her side as we made our way towards the volleyball net.

"Nothing," I muttered, not able to think up some excuse. I mean, what was I supposed to say when I had just been raving about how I was going to bash Leah's face in with the volleyball.

Edward's eyes widened when he saw me and I looked away quickly, but I didn't miss the way those green gems looked me over and took in the small navy shorts and sleeveless blue top that stuck to me like a second skin. I was, however, completely oblivious to the way the boys were looking at me until Rose elbowed me in the side and nodded her head towards them. Even Ben Cheeney was looking, though appeared awfully bashful about it, which would have been cute if he hadn't been dating Angela Weber – one of the only genuinely nice girls at Forks High.

"Okay girls," Coach Clapp came over to us, "Mr Cullen and I are going to be helping the boys," he muttered something under his breath that sounded a lot like, _they're going to need all the help they can get._ "So, split into two groups and you can play."

"Holy shit," Rose hissed, "_That's _Mr Cullen?!"

"Mmm." Was my noncommittal answer.

"Four words. Jesus Christ – well done." She gave thumbs up to the sky and giggled as we positioned ourselves on one side of the net with Kate, Irina and Jessica. Leah, Lauren, Emily, Claire and Chelsea were on the other.

The game did little to lower my stress levels, but it was fairly rewarding when I spotted Edward staring me as I jumped and spiked the ball right in Emily's face. I would have aimed for Leah as I'd planned for my own petty payback but Emily was prancing around in front of Edward, giggling and waving and the girl needed a fucking wake-up call. I mean, what the hell was she doing sticking her ass out as she bent down to tie her shoe in a middle of a volleyball game, anyway?

She let out a yelp and fell onto her backside, a hand covering her face.

"You'll wanna cover that up with a bit of fake tan before you go out tonight, Emily." I smiled sweetly.

She scowled viciously at me as Leah helped her up and the bell rang, signalling the end of the lesson.

"Swan." Coach Clapp called as the other girls headed towards the changing rooms. Brilliant, he saw me. "You can help put the net and the balls away."

"My pleasure, sir." I would have laughed at his startled expression had I not realised at that exact moment that it was Edward I would be helping.

I sighed as I moved to pull the net from the pole holding it up, watching the tension in Edward's eyes as Coach Clapp walked passed us to the Gym. It was only when he was out of earshot that Edward spoke to me, his eyes burning into mine, anger and worry evident on his features.

"I thought you were in college." Short, terse.

"I never said that." Was my quiet defence.

"No, you just had me believe it."

"I didn't have you believe anything, I never told you I was in college, I never told you I was older than what I am."

"How old are you?" He paled, "Please, god, tell me you're eighteen."

"I am." I snapped, bringing my end of the net to his, our hands brushing. A shiver ran down my spine, despite the sun blazing down on us. Edward grabbed the net from my hands.

"You let me believe you lived alone, without your parents."

"For the last time, Edward, no I didn't. You asked if I lived with my mom, I told you I didn't." I hated the fact that his very words were still fresh in my memory.

"Exactly, Bella, _lived_, past tense, as in you no longer live with your parents at this present time. And it's Mr Cullen, to you."

"Wow, the blame game _and_ an English lesson, I'm impressed. Although it wasn't 'Mr Cullen' you were telling me to scream out while we were having sex in your hotel room."

Edward stepped towards me as he hissed, "Keep your voice down. Do you have any idea was this could do to me? I could lose my job and my teaching credentials if this gets out." He was so close to me I could feel his sweet breath fanning against my face as he looked down at me. I licked my lips and he swallowed.

"Is that how little you think of me? You honestly believe I would go spouting off about this?"

"I don't know you." He said slowly. "I know nothing about you. And it definitely cannot happen again."

I fought the urge to scoff. He knew more about me than most, at least, that's what it felt like. It felt like I'd known him forever when I woke up that morning, completely blissful and content, it felt like the stranger's arms wrapped around me had been that way a lifetime, we fit so perfectly it felt like he had known me years rather than hours.

But I didn't like that. I hated that. So I had to leave. Like I had to now.

"Don't worry, _sir_…your secret's safe with me." I grabbed the poles from the ground and headed in the direction of the Gym.

"Bella-" he called after me. I turned.

"Mr Cullen, that's a little inappropriate don't you think? It's Miss Swan, to you."

***FT***

I pulled out my phone as Seth and I walked through the front door and I sprinted up the stairs to my bedroom. I held the phone against my ear and I pulled out a fuck hot outfit from my closet and held it up against me in front of the mirror.

She barely uttered a hello before I spoke, "Rose, be ready to pick me up at nine. I'm so getting laid tonight."

Edward Cullen. Edward-fucking-Cullen who?

* * *

**I'm hoping you're all liking and sticking to this story because it is definitely one of my favourites and I enjoy writing it. Bella's clothes for chapter one and two can be found on my blog - the link is on my profile.**

**Review :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter three, up a lot sooner than the last, you're welcome ;) **

**A few people said they weren't fond of this Bella and I understand that because let's face it, I'm portraying her to be a bit of a bitch. The only reason I like her is because I know why she's behaving this way, I assure you all that Bella will become more likeable, she's just a very troubled person and all will be revealed in later chapters.**

* * *

Chapter Three

"Where's Leah?" I asked between great mouthfuls of food, I knew I needed to eat because otherwise I'd be chucking it up tomorrow morning but I was in a bit of a rush as it was already half seven and I still had to shower and wash my hair. I was going to look amazing tonight, nobody was going to be able to say no, but I needed the time to get ready – without raising Charlie's suspicions.

"She's sleeping round Emily's house tonight." Sue told me, eyeing the way I was shovelling pasta into my mouth with distaste.

I _knew_ Leah told her some bullshit story. The only reason I wasn't bitching on her was because I wanted to be at that party. Once we were both there she had no way of telling Charlie I had gone to the party unless she wanted me to drop her in it too.

"How is that fair?" My question was directed at Charlie.

"Sue trusts her, Bella, and it's her decision. I respect that, much the same way Sue respects my decisions when it comes to you."

I shrugged. Whatever. I got up and washed my empty plate before heading towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Charlie arched an eyebrow.

"I have a load of English homework to do."

"It's the first day back."

"Yeah, well, that didn't seem to matter to the new English teacher. He's a douche."

"Language," Sue murmured. Ha, should have heard what your daughter was saying earlier today.

"Bella's right," Seth piped in. My gaze flickered to his eager face, confused. Edward was being a dick to Seth? "I got loads of homework from him as well. Can you help me with it?" He looked at me with a hopeful smile. I sighed, I really needed to get ready but how the hell could I say no to him when he had to put up with a sister like his? I felt obligated to show him what it would be like to have a big sister that didn't treat him like dog shit on her shoe.

"Sure," I gave him a small smile. "Want help now?"

He nodded gratefully and jumped up to wash his plate. "I'll do that Seth, you and Bella go start on your homework." Sue told him. I saw her and Charlie share a look of pleasant surprise.

Yes, I thought, I can be nice when I want to be.

"Come on." Seth followed me upstairs and into my room. I sat on my bed but frowned when he shut the door loudly behind him. "Aren't you gonna get your homework?"

Seth grinned, "Don't have any."

I simply stared in question.

"Well, I thought you wanted to go to that party."

"How do you know about that?" It was the kids first day of high school.

"Leah was always whining on about how she was never invited, even though she was dating the football team's star player, yet you were always invited." He said.

"Okay…" I said slowly, "but what's that got to do with your homework?"

"I thought it would be a good cover for you. Doubt the rents would try to disturb us what with them being pretty happy about our 'bonding' over English. I could go down later before bed, tell them we finished our homework and you've gone to bed." He trailed off and looked increasingly worried, probably thinking I thought he was being childish or something along those lines. The eager look on his face downstairs and the slamming of my bedroom door was starting to make sense.

"Seth," I said, "you're a genius." I stood and kissed his cheek. He blushed and shrugged his shoulders.

"No biggie." But it was clear to see he was pretty pleased with himself.

I laughed at his would-be blasé attitude and pushed him gently towards the door.

"Wait, you should give me your number."

"Why?" I asked.

"So I can call you if they get suspicious or anything."

I grinned pulling out my phone and handing it to him as he gave me his.

"Seth, you are officially the best. But I gotta get ready."

He laughed, "Yeah, I know, gotta spend hours in the bathroom doing your make-up."

"Hey," I arched an eyebrow teasingly, "I don't take that long, I'm naturally beautiful."

"If you say so." He laughed and ran to the door as I threw a pillow at him.

"Yeah you better run."

He chuckled and whispered mischievously, "See you tomorrow morning, bright and early." and closed the door softly behind him. I shuddered.

Just over an hour later I opened my bedroom window and dropped my black, peep-toe heels to the ground and swung my legs out so I was sat on the ledge. I lowered myself with my arms until my toes were touching the branch below and I hopped off the ledge, my hands gripping onto the knots and branches of the tree. Charlie would probably chop the thing down if he knew how many times this had occurred since the age of fourteen.

By now I was a pro and very rarely ruined my hair or outfit, unless it was on the way up and I was a little tipsier than I ought to have been. But luckily, tonight I was as skilled as ever and my black leather jacket, sequined boob tube that flared at my waist, black wet-look skinny jeans and bangles were all perfectly intact without a hair out of place.

I grabbed my heels as I reached the bottom and sprinted quietly in the darkness to the end of my road and round the corner where Rose was waiting in her red convertible. I jumped into the passenger seat – Emmett was apparently already at Newton's – and pulled on my shoes as Rosalie sped off into the night.

"Here, can you put this in the glove box?" Rose threw a hip flask into my lap.

"What's this?" I asked, "Newton not supplying this year?"

"Of course he is, the idiot gets sucked into providing alcohol _every_ year."

"As he should, he's the bloody host. That's like going to a wedding without an open bar. Pointless."

Rose laughed, "Not all weddings have open bars."

"Exactly, they're the ones no one bothers going to."

She rolled her eyes at me. "It's Emmett's, he started even before the pre-lash and he was absolutely wasted the last time I saw him."

"Which was when?"

"About an hour ago at Mike's – he was helping set up. I told him if he hadn't sobered up by the time I got back to the party with you, he wasn't getting any for a week. I love the man, but fuck me if he isn't a douchebag when he's smashed."

I laughed imagining the look on a drunken Emmett's face when his girlfriend denied him getting down and dirty. "What's in it?"

"Just vodka I think."

I unscrewed the cap and took a swallow.

"Ugh, how do you do that? That stuff is vile." Rose asked in disgust.

"Yeah, well by the time you've had a couple of swigs you just don't give a shit."

Rose shuddered muttering something along the lines of, "may as well drink hand sanitizer", while I laughed at her as we pulled up outside Mike's house. We could hear the blaring music down the street, his neighbours must have been ready to shoot themselves just so they could get some peace, mind you, after three years of this they were all probably well aware of what this party would entail and had all gone out for the night.

Wolf-whistles from those gathered in the front garden, drinking from red plastic cups, followed Rose and I as we stepped out of her car and made our way to the front door. Rosalie scowled at them and they looked away quickly, realising who she was and just how large her boyfriend was. I grinned and sent them a wink, taking another swig from the hipflask.

The place was as crowded as it always was with people packed into the lounge, kitchen and garden. Some were stood on the stairs and I could see people heading out back. Some were on their way downstairs to the game room in the basement – but you had to "play to stay", the majority were drinking games whereas others were just plain stupid like Truth or Dare, although a more adult version. And I can't say that I didn't enjoy Strip Poker last year as I sat in my bra, pants and heels surrounded by Mike, Tyler and Alec, all glaring at me as they covered their dicks with their hands. Shame they were all hidden away so easily.

"Have you seen Emmett?" Rose asked a guy on the football team as we passed through the lounge.

The idiot, the same build as Emmett – big and burly, looked at her through squinted eyes and slurred, "Hey, I know you, you're Emmett's girlfriend."

"No shit Sherlock," I rolled my eyes, "Where is he?"

His attention turned to me and he stared at me as though only just realising I was stood right in front of him. His confused expression turned into a stupid grin, "Heyyy, Beeeella Swannn. Jake told me you were amazing."

"Really? Shame I can't say the same for him."

"Wanna go check out Mike's room?"

I sighed getting a little pissed off. "Hey, if you like your balls as they are I suggest you tell us where Emmett is."

"They're feelin' a little blue baaaby, you gonna fix that for me?"

"Get lost, asshole."

I pulled Rose away from the dickwad and we went in search of Emmett. "I'm gonna check outside." She told me.

"I'll see if he's in the game room."

We parted and I headed in the direction of the basement, taking a mouthful of vodka and putting the hip flask back into my pocket. I was feeling buzzed now and I was ready to play.

"Swan!" Riley Biers called as I made my way round the pool table – on the edge of which Lauren was sitting, pushing her tits out for Tyler while eyeing Irina's ass as said girl bent over the arm of the "Truth or Dare" couch watching the game.

"Biers!" I called back making my way over to him. "You seen Emmett? Rose is looking for him." Riley was Emmett's best friend and man was he sexy. Not as sexy as Edward, but then again I didn't know what that was. I could forget him. I _would_ forget him. All I needed was a little bit of help.

Riley laughed, "Uh oh, someone in trouble?"

"That depends," I said, taking in Riley's slightly drunken state – though he wasn't half as bad as some people. "He still as drunk as shit or has he sobered up?"

"What the fuck do you think?" He raised an eyebrow, "The man's pussy whipped."

"That and he wouldn't survive without sex for a week."

"True dat." Riley chuckled. "Anyway, you up for a game of beer pong? I need you, Swan, my other team mate was shit."

"Who was it?"

"Tyler."

"Well of course he was shit the guy's wasted."

He laughed, "So, what do you say?"

"Who are we up against?"

Riley smirked then nodded his head. I turned to see Leah and the douche from earlier waiting at the table. Oh this was going to be beautiful.

"You're on." I grinned at Riley; he smirked back and pulled me over to the Ping-Pong table by my hand. I stumbled a little in my heels due to the vodka, it was definitely getting to me, I was totally psyched now.

"I got Swan!" Riley hollered and the game room cheered. My beer pong games were legendary.

Leah scowled at me from across the table while the douche grinned and licked his lips.

We had gathered a small crowd and Tyler took it upon himself to commentate. "On the left we have the Dream Team, Bella and Riley. On the right we have the…not so dream team, Leah and Felix." He shouted into an empty beer can. "Bella and Leah are up as the stand back against the table ready to shoot their Ping Pong balls into the cups to determine who plays first."

Riley passed me the ball and I took it with a grin.

"The tension is rising, they'll throw their balls in three…two…two and a half…"

"Crowley!" Half the crowd shouted.

"Fine, fucking throw, see if I care."

We did. I won. We were up first.

Leah glared at me as Riley took his shot and fucking-Felix-douchebag gulped down the first of ten half cups of beer. He roared as he finished, crushing the cup in his hand and those around us cheered.

"That's one point to the Dream Team."

"Shut up, Tyler." Someone said.

"Felix is preparing to take his shot, he shoots and he…aww nice save from Bella as she opted for the bitches blow, dicks flick technique. Nicely done."

Riley gave me a high-five before I took the Ping Pong ball and aimed for the cup closest to me.

"That's another point to the Dream Team as Leah pathetically sips at her drink. Down it, Leah."

Tyler evidently started a chorus of "down it" before Leah finished the drink and grabbed the ball. It landed in the cup at the front of our pyramid.

"Awww, and the Dream Team lose their first cup. The game…is on."

Riley went to reach for the cup but I got there first, "Want me to show you how to swallow, _sis_?"

The beer was gone in seconds and my classmates were cheering as Tyler Crowley crowed, "Oooh, there seems to be some sisterly tension between the contestants, will Leah retaliate with a witty comeback?"

"Shut the fuck up, Tyler." She snapped.

"Apparently not."

Leah stormed off a while later, stumbling and swaying as she went.

"Damn that girl's a sore loser."

"Tell me about it." I giggled. Though we had won I'd had my fair share of beers and I felt a little…giggly. "I need to piss," I stated.

Riley howled with laughter, "Oh you are ever so eloquent in your drunken state, Miss Swan."

I frowned. Miss Swan. I wasn't fucking Miss Swan. How dare he call me that? How dare he treat me this way? Well, Mr Edward fucking Cullen, my name is Bella fucking Swan and you're gonna regret the day I forgotted about you…HIC! I giggled.

Riley laughed, "What the fuck are you talking about, Bella?"

Oh shit. My hand covered my mouth. Riley mistook it for chunder and backed away quickly causing me to burst with laughter. Once he realised the coast was clear he came back towards me, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

"New English teacher giving you a hard time?"

I nodded. You have no idea. "I'm going to piss now."

He chortled, "You do that."

Something was digging into my ribs as I climbed the stairs on my way to the bathroom and I pulled it out of my pocket. Hip flask. My old friend. It took me a little while to unscrew the cap and walk to the bathroom at the same time, but I nearly made it, I was right there before Rosalie popped up in front of me.

"Rose!" I cried, "You're like fucking magic!"

"Bella," she said, "I think you've had enough, don't you?"

I frowned, "Enough? I haven't even started yet, I haven't even got my panties down."

"What?"

"To piss."

She looked at me weirdly like she had no idea what I was talking about before comprehension dawned in her blue eyes. "Oh. Look, why don't I hold onto the flask for you while you go to the bathroom."

I frowned, "You can't have any, it's mine."

"I don't want any, I'll hold it for you while you go to the bathroom so it doesn't get spiked."

This made perfect sense.

I took a swig, while wondering why Rosalie was saying "no", I swallowed once then the flow stopped. I frowned, tipped it upside down and looked inside before throwing it at Rose.

"Can have some if you want, it's fucking empty now." And I slammed the bathroom door shut on her gaping face.

As I peed I heard her and Emmett talking outside the door.

"Emmett, she's wasted, I need to get her out of here. She's already way too drunk to climb back up that tree, I don't know how she's going to get back in the house without Charlie finding out where she was tonight."

"She's a big girl, Rosie, she can take care of herself."

"In her intoxicated state she can drive herself home, climb up a tree and through her second story window?"

Emmett grumbled something.

"Em, I'm scared if I leave her here she's going to end up doing what she always does."

"Fuck every guy she can, you mean?"

"Emmett-"

"No Rosalie, you're not her keeper. You shouldn't be lumbered with taking care of her every time she gets drunk. She fucks by choice when she's sober, I really don't see the difference when she does it drunk."

"She could get hurt, Emmett."

"This is what she does, Rose. This is Bella. I sure as hell don't understand why she's the way she is, I don't have a clue why she feels the need to get with every guy she possibly can, but there's nothing you can do to change her. She doesn't want to be changed, and if she doesn't want to change then she needs to learn that you're not always going to be there for her when she is pissed off her face and does something she really regrets, or can't deal with the consequences."

"She's my best friend, Em."

"Exactly, so why does she treat you like this?"

"It's not like she's _asking_ me to be here for her, or even _wants_ me to intervene-"

"So why do you?"

"Because I would want her to do the same for me no matter how much I thought I didn't want her there at the time, in my delusional and inebriated state of mind."

"Yeah, but the thing is Rose, you don't have a fucked up way of thinking when you're sober. She may as well be constantly drunk for all the shit she does."

This conversation meant nothing to me. I didn't understand half of it but I was sure as hell ready to get out of this bathroom and find Felix.

Felix was big and burly and muscly and he had brown hair and brown eyes and he looked nothing like Edward. He was nothing like Edward at all, and he would make me forget about Edward. Because I couldn't seem to forget about him as quickly as I had forgotten about the conversation Rose and…someone else had just had.

I swung the door open.

The conversation Rose and _Emmett_ had just had.

"Excuse me, please, thank you, kindly." I moved passed them just as Felix reached the top of the stairs.

Aw, the man of the hour…or quarter of an hour… if that. Meh, we were both drunk.

"Bella-" Rose tried to say the same time as I cried, "Felix!" And threw my arms around his neck.

"Wanna help me find Mike's porn stash?"

He looked down at me through blurry eyes before they popped wide open. "Fuck yeah!"

"Bella, wait." Rosalie grabbed my hand to stop me as Felix grabbed my other and started leading me to Mike's bedroom. "Don't have sex with him, Bella. Please. This needs to stop, you can't go on like this."

"Rosie," I cooed, patting her cheek, "I know Emmett may not be living up to your standards in the bedroom department but there's no need for you to sleep with Felix."

She stared at me.

"I know he's hot, though he's a dick, but there's just no need to stop me sleeping with him so you can. I mean, I know Emmett can be a bit of an asswipe sometimes but you should go for someone much better than Felix if you're really going to cheat on Emmett."

"No, Bella-"

"Shhh," I placed a kiss on her cheek, "I love ya, Rose, but I gotta go take care of something." And I let Felix drag me away.

His kisses were wet and sloppy against my neck as he covered my body with his, my back against Mike's bedroom door, much like the way Edward had held me against the hotel room door.

Haha, idiot couldn't fit the key card in he wanted me that badly.

Felix yanked my jacket off me harshly, almost like I had when I ripped Edward's buttons on his shirt and they went skidding and bouncing across the floor. But Felix wasn't sexy, and he wasn't smooth and sensual like Edward was when he undressed me.

Felix tried to fix his lips to mine but they just wouldn't mould right. Edward's lips pressed to mine and fit with them perfectly.

I frowned as I tried to tug at Felix's too short hair and was shockingly disappointed when I opened my eyes to meet his dark ones, ones that I didn't want to see. I wanted to see green, blazing eyes that set my body on fire.

He wasn't Edward Cullen and this wasn't fucking working.

I pushed against his chest to disconnect his lips from mine. "Fuck sake." I growled.

"What?" He slurred, trying to push his body back to mine, to grind his hips against my own.

"This isn't working." I told him.

He laughed, "Swan, I hate to break it to you Swan but this is pretty much how it goes."

His breath fanned across my face, beer, chips and Felix. It wasn't spearmint, cigarettes and Edward.

"No, it's not working, you ain't doing nothing for me." Jeez, did I have to spell it out for the guy? "You're useless at making me forget."

"Oh, baby, I can do things to you that would make you forget your own name."

"Ugh, I said no." I pushed him away.

He tried again.

"Fucking hell, take a hint, asshole."

He pushed himself against me. I could feel everything. I felt sick and it wasn't because of the alcohol. I felt more sober than I had been all fucking night. I clenched my eyes shut pushing away the images that I knew would come to mind and tried to shove him backwards. I was using all my strength; it had no effect on him.

I was going to throw up. I was going to cry. I _had_ to forget.

"You're a little cock-tease, Swan. I've wanted you since Jake told me all about how he fucked you and now it's my turn. You're going to give it to me." He tried to stick his hand down my pants when my knee reflexively jolted towards his crotch.

He howled in pain, doubled over, clutching his balls. He dropped to his knees as his eyes squinted shut.

"You fucking bitch." He wheezed, between groans of pain.

I was out the door and gone.

I sucked in gulps of air as I sat on a bench in the back garden. I don't know how long I had been sitting there but people were dancing and laughing and drinking and shouting and it was all just a noisy, colourful blur. I squinted my eyes shut and pulled my jacket tighter around me trying to shake the bad thoughts from my mind.

I jumped when my phone started to ring in my pocket.

_You're the best,  
__Around!  
__Nothing's gonna ever keep you down.  
__You're the best,  
__Around!_

"S-seth?" I stuttered through my chattering teeth.

"Hey, Bella, uh…I think you better come home now." He whispered, sounding nervous. It was about two in the morning so he was probably in bed.

"Why what's wrong?"

"I think you better come home. Charlie's already been in your room once, I stuffed pillows and stuff under your covers, but he still hasn't gone to bed and he's probably going to check on you again."

"Okay…uh…yeah that's fine, I mean…I'll be right there." My words felt slow and quiet, they were stuck in my throat and I felt like they just wouldn't come out right.

"Are you okay?" The concern is Seth's voice was evident.

"Yeah, of course," I swallowed, "I'll see you in a bit."

I hung up.

I needed to find Rosalie.

I stood on shaky legs and made my way back inside the house. The kitchen was over crowded and I spotted Leah sitting on the counter, biting her lip and fluttering her eyelashes at Felix. Fuck.

"Leah," I called as I headed to her. "I need to talk to you." I saw her scowl at me before turning her attention back to Felix who had yet to notice me. I grabbed Leah's hand and yanked her off the counter, dragging her into the hallway.

"What the fuck do you want, Swan?" She snatched her hand away.

"Stay away from Felix." I slurred.

"Ha! Fucking typical. You can't stand it can you? You can't stand it when guys like me better than you-" she was going on a rant that was making my head hurt. I didn't feel good but I needed her to understand.

"No, Leah, this has nothing to do with whatever the fuck is going on with us," I felt like I had to physically drag the words out of my mouth. "The guys an asshole, okay? He tried to-"

"Oh just shut up, Bella, I don't want to hear it." She snapped. "You know, it _is_ possible that some guys like me more than they like you. Why they hell would anyone want a cheap whore, anyway? You're so fucked up in the head, Bella, no wonder your mother didn't want you to live with her and your-"

I turned and stumbled away. I didn't have to deal with this. If Leah wanted Felix that was fine, she could have the fucker, she couldn't say I didn't try to warn her. I felt sick, I wanted to just collapse into a ball on the floor, the walls were fucking spinning and I didn't have to listen to that shit.

I tripped out the front door and arms grabbed me, I looked up with a dazed smile expecting to see him but frowned when I saw it was Riley. I shook my head, remembering exactly when and where I was.

"Hey, you alright Bella?" He asked with a frown.

My own brows furrowed as I mumbled a "fine" and tried to push his arms away from me, tumbling down the drive.

"Wait, Bella!" I could hear his feet pounding on the concrete as he ran to catch up with me, just like the images were pounding through my mind. My head hurt. "Where's Rosalie? I thought she was taking you home."

I threw my hands up indicating I didn't have a fucking clue where she was while continuing to trot down the road.

"Bella, you can't walk home like this."

"I have to!" I shouted, "my…Seth called me. He said Charlie's going to kill me." What was Seth? My brother? My friend?

"Who's Seth?" Riley asked.

"I don't know!" I cried.

"Look, Bella, why don't you let me give you a ride home?"

I looked up at him with bleary, tear-filled eyes. "But we played beer pong."

He somehow understood what I meant and chuckled, "Bella, you hardly let me drink any of the beers, you grabbed them all before I even got the chance, besides, any intoxication has completely worn off by now, trust me."

"Touch your nose." I slurred, trying to touch my own and ended up tapping my chin.

He smiled as he touched his nose. "Walk in a straight line."

He walked backwards.

"Ha!" I shouted, pointing at him, "That wasn't straight."

He laughed, "Yes it was, Bella, you're drunk."

I thought about that, "Well, the ground is moving a lot, so I guess it _would_ be hard for you to walk straight."

"Come on," he took my hand and led me to his car. I scowled at the way his hand felt it mine. It wasn't right. It was too small and too rough and it wasn't _his_.

Riley made sure I was buckled in before driving off in the direction of my house. I think I fell asleep, I don't remember. But I was home. I waved goodbye to Riley. Yeah, I was home, and there was no fucking way I was climbing that tree.

I rang Seth.

He helped me through the back door and up the stairs. I kept a hand over my mouth to remind myself not to make a noise, I could hear the television on in the living room.

"Thanks," I whispered to Seth as he held my bedroom door open for me.

"No problem. G'night."

"Night," I breathed.

He shut my door quietly. I shuddered.

I toed off my heels and threw them in my closet along with my pants, jacket and boob tube. I pulled off my bra and threw on a shirt as I slid under the covers, kicking all the pillows onto the floor. Why were there so many?

Oh right. Seth. God love that kid.

As I pulled the duvet over my head, I sniffed. What was that smell? I recognised it, but I didn't know where from. It made me feel safe, and warm and calm. My eyes began to droop and as I drifted to sleep it came to me.

Edward.

Fuck.

* * *

**And there we have chapter three :) **

**I hope this chapter gave you more of an indication that Bella is the way she is for a reason, she's not just a slut and a bitch for the sake of it. Let me know what you think.**

**Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Another very quick update and the longest chapter yet. You're very welcome.**

* * *

Chapter Four

My pounding head woke me the next morning along with the alarm on my phone.

_I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation  
__You're livin' in the past it's a new generation  
__A girl can do what she wants to do and that's  
__What I'm gonna do  
__And I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation  
__Oh no not me_

"Ugh, shut the fuck up Joan Jett." I growled groggily, swiping at my phone, before pulling the pillow over my head.

Then came the knocking on my bedroom door. Fuck. Off.

"Bella, I'm heading to work," Charlie called through my bedroom door. "Give Seth a ride to school, please. I'll see you later."

I sighed heavily and pulled my head out from under the pillow, squinting at the light that shone under my curtains. As I blinked the sleep from my eyes I noticed a glass of water and some Tylenol on my bedside table.

Seth, I love you.

I grabbed the pills and swallowed them down with the water before reluctantly swinging my legs round to the side of the bed and standing, stretching my arms above me.

I frowned.

What was I wearing?

I stood myself in front of the mirror hung on the inside of my closet door and gasped. Edward's shirt, I was wearing fucking Edward Cullen's shirt, tied around my waist due to the loss of buttons.

So Edward's smell hadn't been due to my inebriated state of mind last night, I had been wearing his shirt. I didn't even remember putting the fucking thing on. I mean sure I remembered taking it when I snuck out of his hotel room that morning – why the hell I had let myself do that I had no idea – but I couldn't even remember getting changed last night. I just remembered his scent.

I pulled the shirt over my head without a second thought and grabbed some clothes out of my closet, shorts and a cropped boyfriend sweater, which ironically said "take it easy" on the front. I silently agreed, yes, taking it easy today would be a very good idea indeed.

I pulled my bathrobe around me and shuffled my way to the bathroom, I needed a shower desperately, as much to clear my head as to wash his scent off of me.

I felt agitated, like there was a mental itch that I couldn't seem to fucking scratch and I decided there and then…it was going to be a long fucking day.

***FT***

"So, thanks for covering for me last night." I murmured to Seth.

He shut the passenger door of my truck with a smile, as I threw my keys into my grey handbag and we headed to our first lessons. "Don't worry about it. In a weird way it was kind of…nice."

I laughed softly before wincing at the sunlight and pulled on some sunglasses, my military boots scuffing as I dragged them across the ground. "You mean like some weird bonding shit?"

Seth gave a one-shouldered shrug, bashfully. "I guess."

"Have you ever got along with your sister?"

He shook his head; "Leah can be very difficult when she wants to be."

"Yeah, I got that much." I ruffled his hair teasingly, "I can play the big sister part if you want."

Seth shoved my hand away playfully, "Don't touch the hair, it took me ages."

"Ha, I bet." I looked him over and frowned, I think he really _had_ taken ages to do his hair, it was all styled with gel and looked like he was trying to pull off a certain bed-head look I knew only one person could really pull off spectacularly without even trying. "Seth," I said slowly, "There wouldn't happen to be a _girl_, would there?"

"No." He said far too quickly.

"Oh my god, there is! Who is it? She's a freshman right?"

"Shush!" He hissed, looking around him nervously. I saw the way his eyes darted towards a group of girls stood outside the cafeteria doors.

I looked around as we passed, "Is it one of them?"

"Stop staring!" Seth pulled on my arm, tugging me round as we headed towards his locker. I attempted to take my sunglasses off before wincing at the fluorescents and pulled them back on again.

"Come on, which one was it?"

"The one with dark hair." He muttered, shoving some books into his locker before pulling out an English one. The irritating mental itch was back again.

"You're gonna have to give me a little more to go on, Seth, they all had dark hair." I smiled at the way he was acting; it was so fucking cute I wanted to puke. I think this big sister thing is gonna work out just fine. Besides, the teasing was kinda fun.

"Ramnnal Blah." He mumbled.

"Didn't quite catch that, Seth."

"Rachel Black." He hissed, his eyes darting around again before slamming his locker door shut.

Fuck.

"Wow…uh…you know who her big brother is, right?" I asked, worried. Jacob Black was a moron but he was real overprotective when it came to his little sisters, twins, Rachel and Rebecca.

"Of course I do," Seth muttered.

I nodded slowly and decided to change the topic, he was clearly uncomfortable with this one.

"So did you gel your hair to impress her?" Never said I was going to _completely_ change the topic.

"No, she doesn't even know I exist."

"Ah, so you did it to get her attention?"

Seth shrugged, "She likes Mr Cullen." So he changed his hair to look like Edward's.

Itch. "I wouldn't worry about that, Seth, Cullen's way too old for her." Though, unfortunately, not that older than me. "You shouldn't change the way you look for anyone anyway, if they're worth your time they'll like you for who you are, not what they want you to be." Wow, that was deep Swan.

"So, why do you wear loads of make-up and short clothes and stuff?"

Fuck me, this conversation was getting way too personal, "Because I'm not looking for a boyfriend."

Seth seemed to ponder this for a while before asking with a frown, "What am I supposed to do to get her attention then?"

Okay, this was way out of my comfort zone. I knew how to get someone into bed, not ask them on a date. "Uh…I don't know. Talk to her."

"About what?"

"Anything. Do you sit with her in any of your classes?"

Seth nodded, "She's my lab partner in biology."

"Right, so…" start a flirty conversation about the reproductive organs? For fuck sake Bella, he's fifteen. Jesus Christ. "…I don't know, just strike up a conversation, you know, "Hi, I'm Seth, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"" I lowered my voice and mocked the million and one idiots out there who thought this pick-up line worked.

Seth laughed, "I'm not saying that."

I grinned, "Just talk about stuff you like, if she likes it too then you know you've got something in common and you can go from there."

He nodded thoughtfully when the bell rang. He was about to head off when I stopped him, grabbing his arm quickly. "You don't want to get on the wrong side of Jacob Black. Be careful, okay?"

Seth nodded, "See you later, Bella."

I avoided Rosalie and Emmett as best I could the whole day. I couldn't remember exactly what was said but I recalled bits and pieces of an overheard conversation from the night before and I was pretty sure I should be pissed.

I was also trying to avoid a certain English teacher. I knew it would be pretty impossible when it came to the last lesson of the day, which was, in fact, English. But for the rest of the day I could steer clear of him.

It was for these reasons that I found myself in the boys' bathroom right after lunch. I was simply minding my own business, making my way to my next lesson when I spotted Emmett and Rose coming my direction, I spun round intending to take the long route to American History only to be trapped by Edward coming from _that _direction. I rushed through the door closest to me. Hence, the disgusting smell and the compelling need to find the nearest shower asap.

Desperate times called for desperate measures but man if this wasn't getting ri-fucking-doodle-diculous.

I ran my hands through my hair, rubbed the back of my neck, wrung my hands. Nothing. The itch was still there.

It was then, as I stood by the door, waiting for the first chance I got to escape the hell I was in that I encountered the _other_ person who I remembered very clearly from the night before and never wanted to see again.

I should make a shit-list.

"Well, if it isn't Bella Swan. Follow me in here, did you?"

I spun round, my back to the door, this was becoming a way too frequent occurrence. Felix leered at me.

"You can stay away from me." I growled.

"Still going to play it like that, are we?"

"I'm not playing, Felix, stay the fuck away from me or you're gonna get into a shit load of trouble." I wasn't going to make the same mistake.

"Am I now?" He stepped closer.

"Go fuck yourself." I snapped.

"That's not very nice. I'd much rather fuck you. I would have preferred to fuck you last night instead of your pathetic whining step-sister." I shuddered.

I froze. I tried to fucking warn that girl. "What did you do to her?"

"Oh, you wanna hear the dirty details? Wanna hear how she screamed my name and the entire time I pictured it was your voice instead of hers?"

"I swear to god, if you hurt her-"

"What are you gonna do, Swan? Tell the police I raped her? She was fucking gagging for it."

"You make me sick."

He chuckled. "Soon Bella. Soon, you'll be begging for it, too."

I swung the door open and stumbled out, Felix following close behind me. He grabbed my arm and pulled me closer to him so I was pressed against him.

"What's going on here?"

Felix quickly pushed me away.

I cringed at the voice knowing exactly who it was before I even saw him. Edward, who looked as if he had been about to enter his classroom right opposite the boys' bathroom, stared at the pair of us, his gaze flickering from me to Felix and back.

"Nothing, sir." Felix answered with a grin, muttering under his breath, "Not yet."

"Get to class, Mr Volturi, you're ten minutes late."

"Yes, sir. See you later, Bella." I shuddered.

Once Felix was round the corner I turned to leave as well before his voice stopped me.

"Bella," I turned to face him with a heavy sigh. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." I muttered, and tried to leave again.

"Bella-"

"What!"

"Was he giving you any trouble?"

I gave a hollow laugh, "How do you know I wasn't in there willingly?" My voice was hard and bitter and the look of shock and what I believed to be jealousy on Edward's face was way more gratifying than it should have been due to the fact that I was completely and totally indifferent towards the man.

"I was just trying to-"

"Well don't!" I snapped. "I don't accept help from perfect strangers. As that it what we are, remember, _Mr Cullen_?"

He opened his mouth to retort but I was already gone. Fuck him. Fuck Felix. Fuck Leah. Fuck Rose and Emmett. Fuck the lot of them.

I'd already missed the beginning of fifth period, there was no way I was going to that lesson. I pushed open the entrance door and it slammed against the wall as I headed to the back of the gym, pulling out my lighter and a cigarette.

***FT***

I really wasn't going to go to English but when I heard the scuffing of Coach Clapp's shoes on the gravel, coming towards that suspicious smoky smell at the back of the gym I had to move.

Besides, I was meant to have an after-school detention today and Mr Greene would probably have Mrs Cope come to my last lesson to "remind me", in other words, check I was where I was supposed to be and that I turned up to detention.

My detention that I completely forgot to tell Seth about. Crap.

I snagged a seat at the back of the classroom and pulled out my iPhone.

_Got an after-school, sorry I can't give you a ride, you'll have to ask Leah. B-x _

My phone chimed just as Edward started talking.

"Miss Swan, I'll have your phone, please."

"What?"

"Your phone. You can have it back at the end of the lesson."

I sighed as I stood and handed it to him, slumping in my seat and crossing my arms and legs.

"Okay, so what do we know about Of Mice and Men?" Edward asked the class. He was looking good today in his shirt and tie.

I scratched my shoulder.

"It's about mice and men." Mike said cockily, his jock friends laughed. Douchebag.

"Witty as always, Mr Newton." The rest of the class laughed and Mike slid lower in his seat, sulking. "Anyone else?"

"Friendship?" Angela Weber asked.

"Yes, that is a theme in the novel. Any other themes?"

"The American dream."

"Yes, Mr Cheeney. The American Dream." Edward wrote it on the blackboard. "What _is_ the American Dream? Define it for me."

"An ideal lifestyle." Someone called out.

"Good," Edward, again, wrote this on the blackboard.

"Opportunity."

"Yes." It was written down.

"Equality." It was written down.

"Freedom." It was written down.

"Wealth." It was written down.

"Lies." I said. Edward looked up.

"How so?"

"Where was Lennie and George's wealth?" I asked. "Where was Lennie's freedom when he killed Curley's wife by accident and his best friend shot him? Where is opportunity to those living on the streets now? Where is the equality you had with a person before they found out they have a position of authority over you?" Edward's eyes bored into mine. "Where was and is this ideal lifestyle? It was in George and Lennie's heads – and still, after a novel like that, people believe in the American Dream." I shrugged. "It's lies."

The class was quiet. Edward turned slowly to the blackboard.

It was written down.

As the rest of the class headed out towards their lockers and the parking lot when the last bell signalled the end of the day, I slowly made my way towards Edward's desk as though I were a dead-man-walking.

"Your phone." He handed it to me.

"Thanks," I muttered.

"Bella, listen. What I said yesterday…I apologise. I shouldn't have been so harsh on you and I don't blame you for…for anything. I just think we should keep our distance, that's all." I stared at him. "It doesn't mean that you can't come and talk to me if you ever need to."

The bastard. "How dare you?"

"What?" he asked, startled.

"How dare you talk to me like that, so fucking condescending like I'm the poor pining little girl who can't get over the guy that took her virginity. Well, let me tell you something Edward, you weren't my first, far from it in fact. So if that's what you're feeling guilty about then consider your conscience cleared."

"Miss Swan, I was under no illusion that I was the one to…" he lowered his voice, "take your virginity." The redness of his cheeks told me otherwise. "I've heard about your reputation from other members of the teaching staff and believe it or not I did witness you stumbling out of the boys' bathroom like some tart, looking very cosy with Mr Volturi."

I felt like he had just slapped me across the face. To use his words, I was under no illusion of what my teacher's thought of me, of what my peers thought of me and I had never cared. I had been called a slut and a whore and every name under the sun by many. But it felt like he had stabbed me in the gut, especially due to the insinuation that it was Felix I was whoring around with after everything that happened last night.

"Bella…I…I'm sorry." He looked as taken aback as I felt.

"Don't worry about it." I muttered, "It's not the first time and sure as hell won't be the last."

Rosalie was waiting in the empty corridor outside my class. I couldn't catch a fucking break.

"Bella-"

"What do you want Rose?"

"To talk to you, you've been avoiding me all day, I didn't have a clue where you were."

"It feels pretty shitty, doesn't it?"

"What?"

"Needing to talk to someone and not being able to find them."

"What are you talking about?"

"Last night, Rosalie. You ditched me, remember? Left me there."

Rose shook her head and muttered something under her breath she thought I didn't hear.

"Emmett was right, was he? About which part exactly?"

"How do you-"

"I was drunk Rose, not fucking deaf."

"Well he is right! I'm not your fucking keeper."

"No, you're meant to be my friend."

"I am your friend."

"So, you left me stranded at a party with no way home because…?"

"You're my friend, Bella but Emmet is my boyfriend."

"Ah, so this is about bros over fucking hoes?"

"No, its not like that."

"So what _is_ it like Rose? Enlighten me because I'm really struggling to understand here."

"I'm fed up Bella!" She shouted. "I'm fed up of trying to deal with your shit and Emmett's shit and fucking everyone's shit! You really need to tell me why you behave this way because I don't understand why you act like this and pretend that you're okay when you're so clearly broken."

"I don't have to listen to this," I shook my head, turning to walk away.

"See!" Rose yelled, "See, this right here, _this_ is what you do. You fuck around, get into fights and then you run away. You don't deal with anything, you don't talk about anything, which is why you're so fucked up! And this is why_ I_ can't deal with it anymore."

I watched her as she watched me expectantly.

"Are you going to tell me what this is all about?" She asked softly.

I looked at the floor, willing the fucking tears back. I wasn't going to fucking cry. This happened all the time and I wasn't going to cry this time. I was sure of it.

When I didn't answer Rose sighed, her breath slightly shaky, "Fine. Then, I'm done trying to figure it out." As she levelled with me she murmured, "I'll see you around, Bella." And was gone.

I took in a shaky breath before sliding down the wall, burying my face in my hands.

The fucking itching was back.

"Bella?" came his soft voice. I didn't look up. I felt him close to me, I felt him kneeling in front of me. I felt his hands taking mine and gently pulling them from my face. "Are you okay?" He looked so concerned and worried.

I gave him a weak smile, "Fucking amazeballs."

He smiled back, "I'm feeling the very definition of ecstasy, myself."

I couldn't help the small laugh that escaped me. "How the fuck did you remember that?" How the fuck had I?

"I've been trying to forget." He murmured with a frown.

I nodded, "Me too."

"Why can't I forget you?"

I shrugged, "Beats me. I've been asking myself the same question for the last two weeks."

He sighed, "I should really stay away from you, Bella. And you should really stay away from me."

I sighed dramatically, "I know, I just can't get over your amazing skills at picking up women. Curse your apparent vulnerability and sweetness."

He grinned. And then he kissed me.

And the itching stopped.

And I felt better than I had in two weeks. I felt calm, and satisfied and fucking blissful and I never wanted him to stop.

My hands were in his hair, oh his hair, I loved his fucking hair. His tongue ran across my lip before it joined my own. I moaned.

"Fuck," he breathed before pressing his mouth back to mine. One arm was around my back while the other trailed down my hand where it was clutching his hair, stroked down my arm and side, kneaded my ass and trailed down to the back of my knee. He stood, bringing me with him. Then we were moving. I didn't know where to, I didn't give a shit. I just never wanted him to stop kissing my neck.

I felt him placing me down and I opened my eyes to find myself sat on his desk while he stood in between my legs.

"Do you have any idea how fucking sexy you looked today?" He growled between kisses being plastered all over my neck. "With this stupid sweater on."

I chuckled, "Liked being able to see my midriff?"

"Liked it? Bella, I fucking loved it."

"And your legs," he ran his hands up and down my thighs, "So smooth, so silky, just like I knew they would be."

He kissed along my collarbone, down my sternum and nipped at my nipple through my bra and sweater.

I gasped.

He kissed down my bare tummy and pressed a kiss to my pussy, which had completely ruined my panties. He inhaled and moaned, "So good." I gripped his hair tightly in my hands; no one had ever done this to me before. Ever. I thought I was going to bite through my lip and he hadn't even got my shorts off yet.

As if reading my thoughts, his hands went straight for the button and zipper and slid them down my legs, kissing my inner thighs as he went making me squirm. I toed my boots off and kicked my shorts from my feet then Edward grabbed them making me burst out with laughter and I snorted.

He froze, his eyes wide as he stared at me, my hands covering my mouth.

"I got really ticklish feet," I whispered.

He couldn't contain his laughter.

"Shut up." I grumbled.

He kissed my mouth soothingly, thrusting his tongue against my own as he pressed hid torso against mine to get me to lie back on the desk. He nibbled my jaw as his hands lifted my sweater and unclasped the front of my bra. His lips and tongue kissed and licked at my breasts as my hips writhed against the hardness between my legs.

His fingertips trailed down my sides until they reached my panties. I opened my eyes and looked at him when he stopped his ministrations on my nipples. His eyes were wide with ecstatic wonder.

"You're wearing a fucking thong," he said by way of explanation as his hands moulded to my ass.

"You like?" I asked.

He nodded frantically. I chuckled.

Then he began to run his smooth lips back and forth along the waistband of my panties leaving me whimpering for more.

Edward peppered sweet kisses to the covered foldS of my pussy then licked.

"Fuck, please!"

"What do you want, baby?" He murmured against my desperate-to-be-freed core.

"Off, off, get them off. Kiss me."

He pulled my panties off and I could feel him exhale over my bare pussy. I whimpered.

Then he leaned up to kiss me. It was nice, just not where I wanted his mouth. I couldn't help grinding against his covered arousal, the perfect friction. My breasts were rubbing deliciously against his shirt. He was wearing way too many fucking clothes. I pulled his tie over his head and this time managed to undo the buttons and pull his shirt off, all the while my hips were writhing against him. His hands went to my hips to hold me still and I whimpered in frustration. "Kiss me!"

"I am kissing you," he teased.

"Edward, please."

"Where, Bella?" He breathed, "Where do you want me to kiss you?"

"Please, my pussy. Please kiss my pussy."

He was suddenly gone. I whimpered then cried out when I felt his lips and tongue on my wet core.

"Fuck! Ohh, my fuck, please," I gasped frantically holding his head right there my eyes squinted shut, my back arching in pleasure, "please don't stop."

"Mmm," he hummed against me, the vibrations making me moan, "you taste so good, baby."

He sucked my clit into his mouth and flicked his tongue rapidly. I tensed and screamed his name as I came. So. Fucking. Hard.

My body felt like jelly as I pushed myself up on shaky arms and pulled Edward's face to mine by his hair. I kissed him like I had never kissed anyone before, while unzipping his pants and pulling them down with his boxers, stroking his hard-on as he panted in desire.

I pushed him backwards to sit in his big, comfy, leather, swivel chair – his pants still around his ankles – and straddled him. We both let out groans of pleasure as I slid him inside me. It felt like home. It felt like this was where I was supposed to be, and I knew then that no one could make me feel the way Edward could make me feel and that terrified.

"Fuck, I missed you," Edward hissed.

I had missed him, too. But I couldn't say it. I wouldn't.

Instead I pressed my mouth to his as I began to rock, using his shoulders as leverage. He was in so deep this way, so fucking deep and it felt so, so good.

He grunted, "Baby, I'm not gonna last very long."

I cried out as he reached that spot that no one else could and whimpered, "Me neither."

He lifted his hips to meet mine on every down thrust and we were both soon careening towards orgasm.

"Fuck, Bella I…uhh, fuck I'm coming baby, shit." He pulled me close and tight as he tensed and groaned releasing into me. His climax sent me to my second and I clutched at his shoulders, biting my lip and burying my face in his neck to smother my scream.

I panted and trembled in his arms, feeling the rapid rise and fall of his chest against my own. He pulled back a little and he rested his forehead to mine before we opened our eyes to stare into each others' basking in the afterglow of ecstasy.

I ran my fingers through the sweaty hair at the nape of his neck as his thumbs smoothed circles into my cheeks.

"What do we do now?" I whispered, feeling strangely vulnerable, not that I would ever admit it.

"Fuck knows," he breathed, kissing my forehead, "but I can't stay away from you, Bella. I broke after two fucking days." He shook his head. "I just don't know how."

"What does this mean?" I murmured. I knew that I wouldn't be able to stay away from him either. I felt like I was a different person around him, a better person, like when I was with him this was how I was meant to be. I felt safe, and secure and at home, but I didn't know how to be in a real relationship. I had never been in a real relationship and Rose and Emmett were right, I was so fucked in the head, I didn't know how this was going to work. But maybe it could work. Maybe him being my teacher could be a good thing rather than a fucking nightmare, I'd never had a proper relationship, well this wasn't your typical high school romance.

But despite all of this, I had a feeling – call it gut instinct – that this was only going to end in tears.

Edward seemed to be thinking along the same lines. "It means we're screwed."

Yep, we were on a one way ticket to doomed.

***FT***

The second I grabbed my bag from where it had been abandoned in the corridor right outside Edward's classroom I heard a voice that made my stomach sink.

"Miss Swan?" I cringed and turned slowly to face him on my heel.

"Yes, Mr Greene?"

"I would like to hear your excuse for not showing up for detention this time."

Uh…I was fucking your employee and my English teacher then spent the rest of my detention time having a wonderful, half naked conversation with him?

"She was with me, Mr Greene." Edward appeared at the door of his room like a knight in fucking shining armour. "Miss Swan wasn't sure where she should spend her detention so I thought she should spend the time completing an essay I set for homework. That way I knew she would get it done."

"Ah, very well, Mr Cullen. Miss Swan, I doubt you've learnt your lesson but we'll keep trying," Mr Greene said in a tiresome voice, "Mr Cullen, have a good evening." And he headed back in the direction he came.

"That was-" I started to say before another voice – one that confused me – interrupted.

"Bella! Hey, Bella, guess what? I…oh. Hi, sir." He trailed off when he noticed Edward.

"Seth? What are you still doing here?" I asked.

"I sent you a text," he said slowly, looking between Edward and I curiously. "Leah couldn't give me a ride so I asked how long you were gonna be and if I should walk home but you didn't reply."

"That's my fault, Mr Clearwater. I confiscated Miss Swan's phone." Edward saved my ass again. Although, it was his fault – on both accounts – that it needed saving.

"Oh."

"Uh…we better go, Seth. Your mom's gonna kill me."

"Yeah. Er… see you tomorrow, sir."

"Bye." I said.

Edward sent me a wink when Seth's back was turned and I rolled my eyes, going after Seth.

"He confiscated your phone?" Seth asked as we got into my truck.

"Yeah," I murmured, distracted.

"What a jerk."

I smirked. "Yep. Um, did you text Charlie or your mom?" I asked.

"Nope."

"So they don't know where you are?" I arched an eyebrow.

Seth looked sheepishly at me, "No?" He answered as though it were a question.

"Don't worry about it," I murmured, "They'll be relieved to see you."

"What do you mean, don't worry about it?"

"You won't get in trouble."

"But you shouldn't either, it's not your fault that Mr Cullen confiscated your phone."

I laughed, "Yeah, that's a good one. "Sorry Charlie, sorry Sue, I had my phone out it lesson and got it confiscated so I couldn't reply to Seth's text or tell you that we wouldn't be home until later because I had an afterschool detention. But don't worry, we didn't get kidnapped and murdered.""

Seth looked guilty, god knows why, so I decided to distract him.

"So what had you so excited earlier?"

His eyes brightened. "I talked to Rachel."

"You did?" I smiled.

He nodded, "Yeah, and I asked her to homecoming." He looked like a kid on Christmas morning.

"What did she say?"

"We're going together."

"That's great, Seth!" I grinned.

The smile was wiped from both our faces when we stepped through the front door. It was clear Sue had been pacing back and forth in the kitchen and Leah sat at the table, scowling at me when we walked in.

"Seth!" Sue cried and pulled him into her arms. "Where on earth have you been? I've been so worried."

"Mom," he grumbled, trying to pull out of her grasp.

She straightened abruptly and turned to me. "Where have you been?" Her voice was harsh and cold.

Fucking brilliant.

"We were at school."

"Really?" It was clear she didn't believe me at all.

"Yes." I decided the truth was the better option. Sort of. "I had a detention. I texted Seth to let him know and I didn't get his reply. He was just waiting for me. That's all."

"And that's the truth, is it?"

"Yes." I said defensively, because it was the closest to the truth I'd ever freaking told.

"Your father will be hearing about this. I suggest you go to your room."

Bitch. "You're not my mother." I snapped.

"Because your mother couldn't deal with the crap that comes with being your mother, I don't blame the woman for sending you away." Sue snapped.

"Mom!" Seth gasped, horrified.

"Don't worry about it, Seth." I said giving him a small smile before heading upstairs. Wasn't going to give the bitch the satisfaction of seeing me cry.

***FT***

There was a knock on my bedroom door and I shoved the money back in my shoe and threw it to the bottom of my closet before jumping back onto my bed and shoving my earphones in.

The door cracked open and Charlie popped his head in.

I pulled one earphone out.

"Can we talk?" He asked.

"Do I have a choice?"

"No."

"Then why ask?" I muttered.

He sighed and let himself in, closing the door behind him and sitting on the corner of my bed.

"Sue told me what happened." He began, "You know that was really irresponsible of you."

"I don't see what the problem is. We live in Forks and we were at school. It's not like we were going to be snatched out of our classrooms."

"That isn't the point, Bella. When Sue didn't hear from either of you she assumed the worst."

"And what was that? I'd taken Seth to a crack house and sold him for drugs?"

"You're not far off it."

I glared at him.

"Why didn't you call Sue?"

"Sorry, I don't have her on speed dial." I muttered sarcastically.

"Bella-"

"I don't have her number and I knew she was working. Besides, I texted Seth and told him I couldn't give him a ride and I didn't get his reply so I assumed he'd found one." I wasn't going to drop him in it, he was the only one who didn't hate my guts in this house.

"Why don't you give Sue a chance, Bella?"

I gaped, "How the hell did we get onto _this_?"

"Bella, she's not your mother."

Yeah, and I bet she didn't tell you just exactly what she said to me about my mother, I thought bitterly. I knew she hadn't. Charlie would have told me if she had and I wasn't about to tell him. The last time I snitched I got in a shit load of trouble. "Exactly. She's _not_ my mother. So why don't you ask her to stop trying to act like my mother and quit telling me what to do?"

"Bella, she just wants to be there for you."

"Oh yeah, I can totally see that."

He sighed heavily, in much the same way Mr Greene did. "I suggest you come down when you're ready to apologise. Until then I don't think you should come downstairs."

"Apologise?! For what? For bringing Seth home safely? For driving him to and from school every day like his _sister_ should probably be doing? For not treating him as though he's shit that I've stepped in, like Leah does?"

"No, Bella, for letting Sue worry, and panic and think the worst had happened to her son because he didn't come home from school." Charlie shouted. I stared as he stepped out and slammed the door shut behind him, trying not to have a fucking self-pity party and ask myself who the fuck would worry about me like that if I didn't come home from school… because I was pretty sure I wouldn't like the answer.

* * *

**So there's chapter four. And some more Bella and Edward time ;)**

**Bella's clothes for chapter three and four can be found on my blog the link is on my profile.**

**Review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hellooo! I know it's been a while. Been a little busy, but I hope it's worth the wait. **

* * *

Chapter Five

I was making an effort for school today; yesterday I was in a lousy mood, hungover and was planning on avoiding Edward at all costs. Today, I was – I admit – still in a lousy mood thanks to the wicked step-monster and Charlie, but I wasn't hungover, nor was I going to avoid Edward. In fact, today, I was planning on driving him crazy.

I painted my nails and everything. If that wasn't dedication I didn't know what was. I sported a summery playsuit that showed off my smooth legs (Edward made a small comment yesterday that indicated he appreciated them greatly) and my tan sandaled heels. I gave my hair the effortlessly curled look, fluffing it with my hands, brushing on some light eye shadow, mascara and a little eyeliner that enhanced my brown eyes perfectly and added some blusher. With a glance outside I also donned my sunglasses, grabbed my bag, my keys, hollered up the stairs for Seth and jumped into my truck.

Said fifteen year old did a double take as he took the passenger seat beside me and I could see him staring out the corner of my eye as I drove.

I laughed after the fourth time I had outright caught him and a faint redness covered his cheeks.

"What on earth would Rachel say if she saw you checking out your older step-sister?"

His eyes darted to the window, but the back of his neck was red as well.

"Relax Seth," I grinned, "it's a compliment, despite the fact that it's a little weird. But I wouldn't go looking at other girls' legs at school no matter how flattered it makes them, especially if you're serious about Rachel."

Seth glared and said fiercely, "I wouldn't do that."

"Alright, calm down." I placated, joking about such things wouldn't be tolerated I guess. I smirked, it was kinda cute.

"Why do you have all that make-up on again anyway? I thought you weren't going to wear it anymore?"

I frowned, "What gave you that impression?"

Seth shrugged, "You didn't wear any yesterday."

I laughed, "Dude, I was hungover. You're lucky I didn't give you a ride to school in my underwear."

His eyes grew as wide as saucers; "Please don't ever do that, no matter how hungover you are."

I grinned, "You think I would?"

"I wouldn't put it past you." I shoved his arm as he laughed. "Seriously though, I really wouldn't. You don't strike me as the type of person who cares what people think. You'd probably do it to prove a point."

I stared at him as best I could while driving. "You really think that?"

"Yeah," he said staring back at me, "it's a pretty cool trait to have."

I bit my lip, really hoping that Seth wasn't going to start trying to copy my actions, it wouldn't do him any favours. I was the way I was because…well, it was different with me. I just didn't want Seth to end up like me. I was pretty tough, I could take the shit people said about me behind my back, I hardly gave them a first thought let alone a second but that was because I had bigger shit to deal with – I didn't want that for Seth. In these few short days he felt more of a sibling to me than anyone ever had and I didn't want to see him get hurt. "It's also a trait that could get you into a lot of trouble." The warning in my tone was clear.

Seth shrugged it off, "It's also pretty admirable, to be so carefree as to not give a rats ass what people think."

"Not to the people thinking." I muttered.

"But you wouldn't care." Seth laughed, amused with the circle we were going in so I let it drop. For now.

"Well, I hope you care about Jacob Black because if you didn't I'd be worried for your life. Does he know you're taking his little sister to homecoming?"

Seth shrugged and looked out of the window.

"Seth, I meant it when I said to be careful. I mean, shit, if you had seen him in a punch up you wouldn't dare _look_ at Rachel let alone talk to her."

He frowned moodily, "So you're saying I shouldn't go out with her."

I shook my head, "Of course not, just…you need to figure out if you're serious about her or whether you're just, I don't know, curious. Because she is definitely not the one to be curious with…" I let my unsaid meaning hang in the air between us.

"Bella, I really like her."

"And she's worth getting beat up over?"

"Yes! Wait, no…I don't know. I'm not going to get beat up." He shook his head as if trying to shake the confusion.

"If you treat her right you won't."

"What makes you think I would treat her badly?"

"I don't think that Seth, I'm just worried about you. And girls your age can get wound up over little things, they cry over petty shit and then go running to their big brothers and you could get into a lot of trouble."

Seth turned to face me and arched an eyebrow as I pulled into a parking spot. "Are you speaking from experience?"

"How exactly would that work?" I muttered, not looking at him.

"Dunno," he shrugged, "did you cry over nothing at my age and get a guy beat up?"

"Not exactly," I mumbled, "Let's just say I did the crying and snitching and _I_ was the one to get into trouble."

He stared at me in question but I wasn't about to spill my guts to him. He didn't need to know that shit nor did I want him to know and I prayed to god Sue hadn't told him like she had told Leah. It was clear Charlie had bitched about his "problem child" and, up until a couple of weeks before the wedding when I got dropped home by the cops slash my dad's good friend, I think Sue thought she could be the one to bring me to some epiphany, help me to discover the error of my ways and cure me. Bitch. She knew nothing and neither did Charlie.

I sighed heavily wanting to shake the shitty mood that had hovered around me since yesterday so I grabbed my bag and pulled myself out of the truck, heading towards my first lesson of the day, Seth following.

I noticed the smile and wave he gave Rachel as we passed Jacob Black's car, Seth didn't see anything or anyone else but Rachel so missed the glances Jake took between Seth and his sister. Seth didn't see the anger his Jacob's eyes.

I took Seth's arm and pulled him into school yet nothing I said to him about Jacob Black could take the smile off his face and I gathered from the glazed look of his eyes that he wasn't listening to me anyway.

I watched as he walked away from me dazedly to his first class and I leant against my locker. If Seth wasn't going to listen to me and watch his back I was going to have to do it for him. I mean, the kid didn't strike me as an idiot – he managed to cover for me the other night – but he could at least be a little more discreet about crushing on Black's little sister, he was all but rubbing the very muscular and threatening dude's nose in it.

I headed towards the corridor leading to the cafeteria, Jake would be there, it was where he was every morning, goofing around with his sleezeball friends and occasionally shoving his tongue down some poor girls' throat. Well, "poor" was being a little generous as the majority were all but on their knees begging for it. Okay, a tad hypocritical but at least I had the dignity to let them come to me rather than follow them around like some lovesick puppy.

And there he was, leaning against the doorframe and staring down Emily's shirt while she fluttered her eyelashes as if he would notice. Huh, funny how Leah could give me shit about the whole "Jake" fiasco when her supposed best friend was scampering after her sloppy seconds.

"Jacob." I called.

He spun quickly and grin eating up his face, "Hey, Swan. What can I do for you?" He turned his back on Emily who looked completely affronted and stared daggers into my head. Meh, she'd get over it.

"Listen," I said, "Seth is completely harmless-"

He straightened up instantly and a scowl took place of the grin. "Yeah, you just tell him to stay away from my sister."

I rolled my eyes, "They're fifteen Jacob, what exactly do you think they're gonna be doing at homecoming beside holding hands?"

"Oh please, I know exactly what is going on in his head and I was up to a lot more than handholding when I was fifteen."

I outright laughed, "Honey, you can bullshit all you want to your buddies and your little girlfriends but you and I both know who took your virginity and we both know it was a lot more recent than three years ago."

A few of his friends who had been laughing around us stopped and stared. I was glad to see Jacob was rattled.

"Listen here-" He tried.

"No, you listen. If you touch one hair on that kids head I'll tell everyone exactly how long it took before…how shall I put this…your equipment was no longer of any use to me. Not only that but I will tell everyone just exactly what you shouted out in the heat of the moment."

He stared at me, pleadingly and I could almost see the beads of sweat dripping from his forehead in anxiety.

"Yeah. Looks like I'm not the only one with mommy issues, huh, Jake?"

I left him gaping and his friends howling with laughter behind me as I made my way to Biology. He wouldn't be going anywhere near Seth for a while.

My crappy mood was slowly lifting.

It returned quickly though when Rosalie decided now was the time to talk.

"Bella," she said as I tried to pass her for Biology.

"What do you want, Rose?"

"We need to talk."

"Didn't we do enough of that yesterday?"

"I just-"

"I thought we established that you no longer wanted to be friends. Why do you want to talk to me now? Did Emmett dump your ass?" I asked scathingly. She had ruined my gradually recovering mood and I wasn't up for playing nice.

"I was angry, okay? You don't talk to me anymore, you don't tell me anything and I miss that and I was angry because you expect all this shit from me and give nothing in return. Friendship isn't all about taking, you know? You've gotta give sometimes."

I scoffed. "Rose, I'm really not in the mood for a therapy session right now. You wanna play Dr Phil, take a look at yourself."

"What the fuck is your problem?" She glared. "I'm trying to make up with you and yesterday I was just trying to help you. I'm always trying to help you, Bella, but you've gotta help _me_ out a little."

"I don't want your fucking help. I don't _need_ help, no matter how much you think I do. If anyone is in need of help it's you. You need a fucking reality check."

"What's that supposed to mean?" She took a step towards me. I didn't back down.

"You're living with your head in the clouds, Rose. One day, you're going to wake up and realise that the world is falling down around you and there will be nothing you can do to stop it." I spat. "You can't help everyone by talking about feelings and rainbows and ponies. There's no such thing as true fucking love. You act so superior to everyone around you because you're in this _amazing_ relationship when really it's all a fucking lie and you're the only one who can't see it."

The few stragglers who were late for class were starting to stare now but I didn't give a shit. She had said her piece yesterday and now it was my turn.

"You tell me I'm broken and pretending I'm not, you tell me I run away from feelings and difficult situations. Well at least I acknowledge them, at least I can admit that they're there. At least I'm not fucking delusional. You think you and Emmett can go on living all happily ever after up on cloud nine but you can't, because the world isn't like that. And you're going to get hurt bad when you go to different colleges and he fucks a load of other girls because you were just too fucking blind and off in your own world to see what life is really like and everything else that is going on around you."

I could see the tears in her eyes and I felt a lump in my own throat, I felt a twinging in my stomach that I knew to be regret, I fucking lived, breathed and shat regret but I couldn't apologise for the truth. I wouldn't.

"What happened to you, Bella?" She asked softly. "I mean, I knew the second I met you that you were angry and unhappy with the world but it's just gotten worse. I don't like this Bella."

"Well it's a good thing you no longer have to deal with her then, isn't it."

I stormed into Biology and got another freaking detention for being late.

Fucking fantastic.

***FT***

I was shoving books into my locker just after the lunch bell sounded when I saw Edward for the first time today. He was walking down the corridor and damn if my panties weren't ruined the moment I saw him.

He was Mr fucking Sex-On-Legs, his sleeves rolled up to just below his elbows, his top button undone as his tie hung loosely. I wanted to devour him. I wanted to taste him as he sat naked in his classroom chair wearing nothing but that tie. Fuck I think I moaned out loud.

His green eyes met mine and I couldn't help the smile the spread across my face in reaction to his own. God I wanted to kiss him. His eyes were warm as they locked with mine. He was the only one to smile at me like that today. Even Seth seemed to be in a funk with me over this morning. And suddenly I just wanted to feel his arms around me in a completely non-sexual way. I could feel all the shittyness of last night and today just building up and I just wanted him to hold me.

He started to move towards me and I took a step in his direction when somebody blocked my vision. My eyes bore into somebody's plain grey t-shirt and I looked up to see Riley looking down at me.

"Hey, Bella." He said with a grin.

"Hi, Riley," I muttered, distracted, looking over his shoulder to see Edward, whose eyes had turned hard. I frowned.

"I hear you and Rosalie are on a bit of a break."

"Mmm," I mumbled.

"You wanna talk about it?"

I shook my head, "No thanks." I want you to go away.

"I can see you're pretty upset about it."

I looked up at him. Really? Rosalie was the last person on my mind right now. I was trying to figure out what the fuck I had just been absolutely aching for. A completely non-sexual and innocent action that seemed more intimate that sex. Now that was messed up. What the fuck was wrong with me?

"I just want to be left alone for a bit, Ri." I said.

"Oh right sure. I was just wondering if you got into a shit load of trouble with your parents for Monday night?"

"Parent. Singular." I muttered. My eyes were on Edward who seemed to be still walking this way though with determination in his eyes.

"Huh?"

"Sue married into the family, she's not my mom." I said out of habit.

"Oh, right. So did you?"

"Did I what?"

"Get in trouble?"

"When?"

He laughed, "Were you even listening? Monday night. You know, sneaking into the house in the dead of night drunk off your ass could be disagreeable to some parents – sorry, _parent_." He corrected.

"I'm going to pretend I didn't just hear that Mr Biers."

God, even his voice sent shivers up my spine. I felt warmth inside me when he spoke and I didn't understand what it was. But I knew it wasn't sexual – just like my aching need to feel his arms around me – which confused the hell out of me if I wasn't confused enough before.

Riley spun round to face Edward, who was looming over him menacingly, that hard look in his eyes.

"Sir…I was, uh…just telling a funny story."

"Yes, I'm sure it was highly amusing. Miss Swan, could I speak to you about your essay for a moment, please?" His eyes moved to me and I sucked in a deep breath.

"Sure," my voice shook. What the fuck? "I'll see you later, Riley."

He nodded headed for the cafeteria as I followed Edward to his classroom. I entered and he locked the door behind him.

I turned to face him when suddenly his lips were on mine and all I could do was succumb to him as his tongue flickered heavenly against mine, thrusting, taking, and giving all at once.

I hummed into the kiss and he growled as he lifted me to sit me on his desk as he stood between my legs. "Isabella Swan...you'll be the death of me." His mouth crashed back to mine as his hands ran up and down my thighs.

"So fucking soft," he groaned between kisses.

I couldn't help the smile. I knew he'd like it.

He peppered sweet kisses against my mouth as we calmed a little. A little enough for me to ask breathlessly, "What was that all about?"

"Nothing," he grumbled, his eyes not reaching my own as he moved to kiss my neck. "God you smell so good."

"Marc Jacobs perfume." I gasped as his teeth grazed the hollow beneath my ear. "Seriously, though," I reluctantly pulled his head away from my neck, kicking myself as I did so. "What was that about?"

"What do you mean?" He mumbled, his forehead pressed to mine as his hands wandered over my body, brushing up and down my sides, stroking my arms, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"Well, for starters I thought you were gonna be a little more discreet than this, we _are_ in school. And for another, you all but dragged me away from Riley."

"You're friends with him?" He asked, nipping at my lips.

"Well, yeah."

"What about the other one?"

"What other one?"

"The one you were with this morning."

"Seth?" I asked incredulously. "You know he's my step-brother."

Edward shook his head, "No the one you were arguing with _about_ Seth."

"Jacob Black? How did you know I was arguing with him about Seth?"

He shrugged, "I saw you."

I didn't say anything. If he had heard me talking to Jacob about Seth he must have heard what I said about his virginity and whatnot. Fuck.

"So? Are you friends with him?"

"…Not exactly." I hedged.

Edward stared, waiting for more.

I sighed, "I fucked him." Nice and quick, like a Band-Aid. Though why I was so worried about his reaction I had no idea.

Edward's reaction was controlled. Too controlled. Which meant he had heard earlier. "Well I don't like him."

"You and me both." I muttered.

"I don't like the other one, either."

"Why, what's wrong with Riley?" I asked.

Edward shrugged and said nothing. And then it dawned on me.

"You're jealous!" I gasped.

He scowled, "No I'm not."

"Yes you are!" I gaped, "This totally makes sense." His warm eyes before he spotted Riley and they turned hard. His weird though exquisite possessive kisses. He was so totally jealous.

But he had no reason to be jealous. At least, I didn't think he did. We weren't doing the whole relationship thing were we? We never actually clarified that yesterday.

I dropped my hands from around his neck and rested them on his chest, his hard, muscular chest and frowned thoughtfully as he pressed kisses to my shoulders and neck and collarbone.

"What are we doing?" I murmured softly, fiddling with his tie, refusing to meet his eyes as he stopped his ministrations and looked at me. For some unknown reason I suddenly remembered how I had wanted him to just hold me earlier and I felt extremely, inexplicably vulnerable.

He sighed as he caressed my face with his hands, running his fingers over my cheekbones, my jaw, and my chin. "I don't know," he whispered after a while. "I don't know what you want."

I slowly looked up at him completely and totally confused and conflicted. I didn't know what I wanted. I knew we couldn't just fuck and then walk away, for some reason neither of us seemed to be able to do that. And I knew I felt safe with him but was I ready for a relationship after…I shuddered.

I told him the one thing I was sure of, the one thing I needed, wanted. "I want you to hold me."

And he did.

He wrapped his arms around my body, holding me close to his own. I rested my head on his chest and he kissed the top of my head, smoothing my hair and held me tight. So tight and close.

And for the first time since I was fourteen I cried in front of somebody else. Try as I might I couldn't stop the tears from falling and I buried my face in Edward's chest.

I couldn't help it I felt so many mixed emotions I was just so utterly overwhelmed. And I hadn't been held like this in years.

And it felt so good.

"Bella?" He murmured softly, the concern laced in his voice only encouraged more tears to fall. "Bella, baby," he lifted my face with his hand though struggled, as I didn't want to let go. "Hey, hey, what's wrong?"

He pressed his forehead to mine when I tried to look away and his eyes held nothing but worry and warmth.

So I told him. I told him everything I could. There were certain things, certain secrets that I kept to myself – I wouldn't be telling anybody those ever – but everything else, I told him. I spoke until my throat was sore. I told him about what Sue had said, what Charlie had said. I told him about my fight with Rosalie. I told him about my relationships - none of them at all emotional, all of them sexual. I told him how once I had started I just didn't know how to stop. And then I told him about us. I told him how I fucking felt.

"I don't do feelings and relationships, Edward," I murmured as he brushed the tears from my cheeks with his thumb. "I fuck guys and that's it. I'm sure you've heard." He had told me as much yesterday.

"Bella," he shook his head with a frown, "I can't tell you how sorry I am for-"

I shook my head, "Don't. Don't worry about it. It's the truth."

I could see in his eyes that he wanted to protest, he wanted to tell me that everything he had been told were lies but he couldn't. So instead he did something else, he did something Rosalie had been doing for the past couple of days. He did something Charlie had been doing for the past four years. He asked, "Why?" I sucked in a sharp breath. His voice was soft and warm, it wasn't harsh and cold, he just wanted to understand why I did what I did, why I continuously wrecked my life over and over again.

"I…" I shuddered, squeezing my eyes shut tight, my arms wrapped around my body, fighting to hold myself together, "I…I can't…I…"

"Hey, hey, shhh, it's okay," Edward pulled me into his chest as I swallowed back the sobs that threatened to engulf me, "It's okay." he murmured soothingly as he pressed kisses to my forehead and temple, smoothing my hair. "You don't have to tell me, yet, it's okay. It's okay."

And I had never felt so fucking happy crying in someone's arms. I had never felt so safe. The bliss and the content from that first night filled me, from head to fucking toe and here in Edward's arms I wasn't scared of it. Here in Edward's arms I knew what I wanted.

Now I was just too chicken shit to tell him.

***FT***

"Have you got a class next lesson?" I asked Edward, my eyes wide as the bell sounded for next lessons to begin.

"No," he breathed against my lips, "but you have."

He rose and lifted me from his desk before he grabbed his pants from the floor and I snatched my playsuit from the back of his chair, pulling it on and shouldering my bag.

I helped him to quickly button his shirt – he had left his tie on at my request – which he pulled over his collar and folded it over, throwing me a grin, before pulling me to him and kissing me so fantastically orgasm-worthily that I had to pull away before we began round three. Yeah. We may have gone a couple of times in the remaining thirty-five minutes of lunch.

"You know, for an old guy, you're pretty good."

"Old guy," he grouched, "I'm only just six years older than you, you know."

"You're twenty-four?"

He nodded.

"God, I have no idea why but that's so unbelievably sexy."

He smirked, "I have a certain charm."

"Oh, yeah, I know all about your charm."

He laughed, "Yes, yes you do."

The warning bell sounded and I groaned.

"Go on," he urged gently, kissing my forehead, "or you'll get a detention."

"Shit." I muttered.

"What?"

"I already had one…I missed it." I bit my lip.

Edward rolled his eyes, "What was it for this time?"

"…Being late."

"Go!" He laughed pushing me towards the door.

I rushed back and pulled his face down to mine. He hummed into the kiss. "I'll see you later," I murmured and then I was rushing to American History.

***FT***

"How was your day?" I asked Seth as he jumped in next to me in the truck where I had been waiting for him.

He shot me a glare as he pulled on his seatbelt and I pulled out of the parking lot.

"What?" I asked, bewildered.

"What did you say to her?" He was beyond angry.

"Wait, what? To who?"

"Rachel. What did you say to her?"

"Seth, I've never spoken to the girl in my life." I told him honestly.

"You're a liar." Though he was much more hesitant this time.

"Seth! I promise you I haven't said a word to her. Why? What's happened?" My eyes darted between him and the road.

"She said she's not coming to homecoming with me anymore."

"Why?" I asked, angry.

He shrugged, "I thought you had said something to her because you were worried about Jacob."

I didn't answer. Maybe Jacob had said something to Rachel because of our argument this morning. Shit.

"Seth," I murmured reluctantly, "I, uh…I think maybe there's a chance I may have had something to do with that."

"What?" His head turned to me so quickly I thought his neck could've snapped. "What do you mean?"

"I uh…" I took a deep breath, "I spoke to Jacob."

"What? Why? What did you say?"

"Well…I threatened him, I guess."

"Explain." The anger in his voice threw me. I had never seen him like this before. Sweet innocent Seth looked ready to kill me.

I shrugged, "I told him that if he hurt you I would…well, I would tell his friends something that would humiliate him, embarrass him. A lot."

"Why would you do that?"

"Because he's a scary guy, Seth, I don't want him to hurt you."

"That's not your job, you're not my sister. You've gone and messed up everything." He glared at me coldly.

I oddly felt hurt and helpless.

"I…I'll talk to Jacob, or Rachel, I'll fix it." I tried, my voice sounded small even to my own ears.

"Don't bother," Seth muttered, slumping back in the seat, "You'll probably just make it worse."

I opened my mouth but I had no response. "I'm sorry," I murmured quietly.

Seth said nothing.

He jumped out the truck as soon as I had parked and stormed into the house, up the stairs and slammed his bedroom door.

I sighed heavily as I sat myself at the table in the kitchen not noticing Leah stood by the fridge until she spoke.

"What did you do?"

I jumped, "You scared me."

She grabbed a coke and closed the fridge before repeating herself, glaring at me. "What did you do to Seth?"

I ran my hands through my hair in frustration, "He had a date with Rachel Black and I ended up screwing it up for him."

"Do that a lot, don't you, Bella? Screw guys. Screw people over. You're not exactly sisterly material, I mean, it would be hard to be a sister being the way you are. And a daughter. Even a freaking girlfriend, for that matter."

The phone rang.

"You're a screw up, Bella. I could've told you from the second you started your weird little thing with Seth that it would end this way."

I watched her as she walked out of the kitchen before grabbing the phone just to stop the annoying sound.

"Hello?" I sighed, suddenly completely tired and worn out.

"Oh…hi." Her voice was stiff and cold. I knew who was at the other end of this phone the second the vowel was out of her mouth.

"Victoria." I muttered as a greeting.

"Is dad home?"

"No. He's at work."

"Fine." There was a moment's pause in which we both said nothing, waiting for the other to speak. Waiting to see what would happen.

She simply hung up.

Well, that wasn't quite how I imagined the first conversation in four years with my big sister to go.

I sighed heavily as I put the phone back down.

Leah was right. Seth was right. I ruined everything I touched. Maybe I shouldn't tell Edward what I wanted at all. Maybe he would be better off if we stopped everything right now.

As Leah had said, she could tell from the start where Seth and I were going to end up. Was it the same with Edward? Looking at it now there was a ninety to ten percent chance of this ending in tears versus ending in a happily ever after. Perhaps it would cause less hurt if I ended it now.

Because I destroyed everything. That was what I did. Leah, Seth and Victoria would vouch for that.

I spent the rest of the afternoon doing my homework at the table but moved to my bedroom when Sue got home and Leah and Seth came in to talk to her while she made dinner.

I felt like an intruder in my own home as they all shot glares at me, or stared as though wondering what on Earth I was doing sitting at my own kitchen table. And I had never felt more alone or alienated when Charlie came home and joined them, kissing Sue on the cheek greeting Seth and Leah like they were his own, smiling at her, patting his back. He gave me a curt nod when I told him Victoria called and he spent a while laughing on the phone with her. The daughter he wished lived with him.

As I nibbled on a sandwich in my room that night – I still had yet to apologise to Sue – even the small note from Edward with his number, found in my bag, did little to lift my mood.

* * *

**So there it is. Finding out a little more about Bella, she had no one on her side and has yet to decide what she's going to do about Edward. **

**Bella's outfit can be found on my blog - link is on my profile. Hopefully the next chapter will be up much quicker than the last.**

**Let me know what you think.**

**Review! :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter update much quicker than the last :) and it's the longest one yet.**

* * *

Chapter Six

I woke to the sound of laughter coming from downstairs and I frowned. What the fuck was going on?

I threw my covers from my body and swung my legs round to pull on some woolly socks, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. One glance in the mirror told me I looked as well as I had slept and I groaned, pulling the mess that was my hair into a ponytail before grabbing a sweater and stumbling downstairs to see what the chaos was about.

Nothing apparently.

Charlie and Sue were sat at the kitchen table with Leah while Seth was making himself a bowl of cereal. Their laughter stopped as I walked in. I frowned at the ache in my chest and made myself some coffee to disguise my intentions.

They were simply being one big happy fucking family, that was, of course, before I popped their bubble by enlightening them to my presence and reminding them that they did in fact have a burden living with them.

Seth sat down at the table and I could feel four sets of eyes on me as I stood with my back to them, gazing out of the window as I sipped my bitter black coffee. Leah had used all the sugar again for her freaking bran flakes. What was the fucking point of eating that healthy shit just to smother it with sugar?

Sue cleared her throat.

"Sleep well, Bells?" Charlie asked, breaking the awkward and tense silence.

"Not really," I muttered, humouring him in his endeavour to make me think that he gave a shit.

"Guilty conscience?" Leah sing-songed.

"Not at all. But between Sue's moaning and groaning, the thump, thump, thump of the bed on the other side of my wall and you slamming the front door as you snuck in last night it was a rough night's sleep." Yeah, bitch. I know you snuck out to see Felix.

I turned to see Leah gaping at me, I could almost see myself being slowly and painfully murdered in her mind as she glared. I had never seen anyone turn a deeper shade of red than Sue had at that moment and Charlie looked ready to strangle me. Seth looked a little green. At least he had slept through it.

"Bella!" Charlie shouted, "I will not accept that sort of…" He looked ready to combust as he searched furiously for the words that were fast escaping him in his anger.

"Well I'm sorry, _daddy_, but you asked me how I slept. And you know you raised me right, telling me to always speak the truth."

I rinsed my mug in the sink as the madness began behind me, Charlie trying to console Sue while she alternated between shouting in humiliation and angrily questioning Leah, who started crying crocodile tears, sobbing about how I was a nasty little liar.

I shot them all a smile as I all but skipped out of the kitchen. "I'm going to get ready for school. Have a good day." They wanted to play happy families – I could play, too.

On the outside I was happily causing destruction and chaos, on the inside I was screaming.

I ran up the stairs, closing my bedroom door with restraint so as not to let them hear me slam it – I wouldn't let them know how angry I was. I wouldn't let them know how much their silence and their stares affected me. Nobody listened to me when I tried to show how I felt before, so I wasn't going to _let_ them see how I felt now.

I threw myself onto my bed on my stomach, buried my face in my pillow and screamed.

***FT***

I pulled on my turquoise Vans as I looked in the mirror. I straightened my dress, tight and flowery at the top, fixing the small straps to hide the straps of my bra and tugging on the ruffled black skirt of it. I tightened the messy but styled and glamourous bun at the top of my head, shouldering my bag, my bangles and bracelets jangling as I placed my Ray bans on my head and made my way outside to the truck.

I apparently wasn't giving Seth a ride today because he had already left with Leah. Whatever.

I pulled the glasses down over my eyes, so I wasn't squinting in the sun as I drove to Forks High School to begin another day.

But my truck wouldn't start.

I tried again, turning the key in the ignition but it only made an annoying whirring noise that did not sound healthy at all.

I sighed heavily and let my head fall to the steering wheel. Today was not my day.

I pulled my phone out of my bag and scrolled through my contacts list before realising there was nobody for me to call.

There was no fucking way I was calling Leah to come and help me, and it wasn't like she would, anyway, after I snitched on her this morning.

Sue was definitely not an option. She managed some sort of bakery on the Quileute reservation, I'd never been there, and she probably wasn't in the mood to be doing me any favours. It would probably mean me having to apologise to her, as well, which was not going to happen.

Charlie wouldn't be able to give me a ride, he was already at work, and though he would probably have taken me to school – he was very much part of the "keep your kids in school" campaign – he wouldn't have been able to get away from work being the Chief of police and all.

I wasn't talking to Rose, nor was I going to get her boyfriend to pick me up.

I guess there were guys I could call, but they would want something in return. Something I was definitely not willing to give.

A brief moment of insanity crossed my mind before I brushed it away very quickly. I wasn't going to call Edward. I couldn't. That was just asking for trouble. _"Hi Mr Principle, Edward – I'm sorry – _Mr Cullen,_ is giving me a ride to school because I called him when my truck wouldn't start. Why do I have his number, you ask? Well, he slipped it into my bag after our third secret fuck right under your nose in the English classroom. Please don't expel me or fire him."_

Yeah, I don't think so somehow.

I groaned as I glanced at the time on my phone. I was late and was going to be later still. It looked like I was walking.

***FT***

I sent Edward a text as I began my walk.

_Gonna be late for English. Truck won't start. Talk later. Bella-x_

He didn't have my number, but how many other Bella's did he know that were his students yet also sent him texts?

It was lucky English was my first lesson of the day, otherwise I would have been screwed.

And yet, despite this, I was screwed anyway. What a fucking surprise.

I gave a small, "Sorry I'm late, sir." As I made my way to my seat in Edward's classroom.

"No worries, Miss Swan." His eyes held my gaze a little longer than appropriate for a "teacher/student" relationship but nobody noticed. And damn did he look fine today.

I didn't miss the way his eyes kept glancing in my direction during the remaining ten minutes of the class, devouring my legs, my chest. When I caught his eyes he would shoot me a small smile before looking away and asking a clueless student to take over reading the chapter we were on – catching them out as they were meant to be following along.

So he could check me out and keep an eye on my unsuspecting classmates at the same time. Impressive.

It was when the bell rang to signal next lesson that the first real smile of the day was drawn to my lips. Through the palaver and hustle and bustle of students clearing away their things and traipsing off the next lesson, Edward smiled at me and mouthed: _You look beautiful, today._

I felt the content running through my veins and something else, something else was surging through my body with such force that it was making my skin hum, my heart beat fast in my chest and threatened to make the smile on my face reach ear to ear. It was a foreign feeling, mixed with something else that I hadn't felt in such a long time that it took me a while to determine what it was. Happiness.

I was stood by the door, my classmates pushing past me, trying to get to their next lessons. I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to tell him. But could I? Would we both be better off if we didn't even bother trying?

But before I could make a decision a voice I really didn't want to hear right now made me turn my back on Edward.

"Miss Swan."

"Yes, Mr Greene?" I sighed heavily.

"Care to explain to me why you were late, again, today?" How the fuck did he know? Did Edward tell him? Before my anger and confusion could get very far the Principle continued. "We had a fire drill this morning. Had it been a real fire, men would have risked their lives trying to find you in a burning building while you were sat at home."

"That's rather sexist, sir." I muttered before I could stop myself.

"I'm sorry?"

"Women can be fire fighters, too."

He closed his eyes and I could see his lips twitching as he counted backwards from ten.

"My truck wouldn't start, sir. I had to walk." I said before I could find out what would happen after he reached zero.

"And you couldn't possibly have had your sister bring you to school?"

"She's not my sister." I all but growled. "And no. I couldn't _possibly_ as she had already left."

"And your parents?"

I was really starting to lose my patience, why didn't people understand that I only lived with one of my parents? Why was that so difficult to grasp?

I restrained myself from making another remark that would definitely get me into more trouble. "They were at work."

"And you had no friends to call, absolutely no one to pick you up?"

I could almost feel Edward's eyes staring into the back of my head as I muttered, "No."

"Hm." He eyed me suspiciously. "Well, I shall be calling your parents about this little incident-"

I couldn't help it. I really couldn't. "Parent. Paren_t_." I spat the "t". "I live with one parent. Sue Clearwater is not my mother, nor is she my parent in any way, shape or form."

Mr Greene regarded me with raised eyebrows before he continued. "Be that as it may, Miss Swan, this does not mean I shall not be calling them and informing them of your tardiness. I suggest that you devise some sort of strategy, keep an alarm clock on you at all times if need be so you get to your lessons on time, lest, of course, you wish to be applying to a new school next semester."

I stared at him and said nothing.

"Apologise to Mr Cullen for your lack of discipline and I shall escort you to your next lesson."

"She already has apologised, Mr Greene." Edward murmured behind me.

"Very well. Follow me, Miss Swan. I'm sure Mr Banner is positively giddy with anticipation to find out your excuse for not turning up for your detention yesterday afternoon."

I held in a groan as I followed Mr Greene out the door, looking back quickly to glance at Edward who had a sympathetic expression on his face.

I felt my phone vibrate in my bag but I didn't dare look at it until I was seated in Biology, Mr Greene safely out of earshot and eyesight in his office.

_Talk to you later. Don't get into anymore trouble or I'll have to punish you, naughty girl. ;) E-x_

I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face which Mr Banner mistook as sincere delight at getting to dissect a frog. He looked a little worried as he handed me a scalpel.

***FT***

Since Mr Banner was worried for my mental health and probably wanted me as far away from the scalpels as quickly as possible, he let me off for the missed detention yesterday with a mere warning and a promise to try not to be late again. Try, being the key word.

This meant that I had a free lunch time to spend with Edward though I found myself dawdling on my way to his classroom as everyone else rushed in the opposite direction for the cafeteria.

This had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I was clueless as to what I had experienced this morning. I mean I completely understood the happiness part – though what had caused it I wasn't totally sure – okay, so I had a hunch but I wasn't willing to explore it just yet. The other part, the other emotion mixed with the happiness that had made me feel as giddy as one of those pathetic giggling, prancing cheerleaders, had me scared shitless.

I didn't know what it was.

That was a lie.

I knew what it was and it scared me. I had never been more scared in my entire life because I was now craving it. And the more time I spent with Edward the stronger it was going to get but he couldn't guarantee that this was going to end in sunshine and rainbows, and if it wasn't going to – which I sincerely believed it wasn't – then it was going to be incredibly painful.

It terrified me.

So when I reached Edward's open door the only reason I didn't turn and run as fast as I could, away from here, was because he spotted me.

He looked up from where he was grading papers at his desk and smiled.

And for the life of me I couldn't help returning the smile just as brightly because I could fucking feel it again. It was completely out of my control and I didn't know how to stop it.

He stood, coming towards me, placing a hand on my arm as he closed and locked the door with the other. He pulled down the small blind that covered the small glass window in the door and pressed his mouth to mine.

It wasn't possessive and urgent like many of our other kisses had been. It was sweet and soft and left me breathless.

Fucking hell I was screwed.

"Are you okay?" He asked softly, tucking a lose strand of hair behind my ear, his lips still so close to mine, they brushed together when he spoke.

I nodded, "Uh huh." My eyes were locked with his and I couldn't tear them away.

"You seem a little off today." He murmured.

I shook my head and told a little white lie. "I'm fine."

He saw straight through me and it made me want to cry with fear.

"Bella, talk to me, baby." He lead me over to his chair and sat me down in it while he leant against the desk, facing me, keeping my hands enclosed in his.

"I…" my eyes darted around the classroom, not daring to look at him. But I melted into his touch as he cupped my cheek in his hand. I felt so fucking cared for I wanted to cry. "I'm scared." I whispered, my eyes closed as I held his hand to my cheek.

"Of what?" He breathed, smoothing circled into my skin with his thumb.

"Of this. Of us. I'm not used to any of this. I told you I don't do relationships or feelings and you're making me feel things that I can't control and it scares me." The confession spilled from my lips so freely that I could do nothing but curse the safety I felt here with him. Damn him. "I don't just want to fuck you and leave. I can't seem to be able to do that with you. You make me want things I haven't wanted since I was a kid, you're making me long for things I have no right to have."

"What do you want, Bella?" He asked.

"I want to kiss you, and I want you to hold me again like you did yesterday and that scares me. It scares me because I didn't want you to let go." I took a deep breath and opened my eyes to see him watching me intently. "I want more than just a quick fuck. I want…I need a relationship with you and I don't deserve it."

"Why, Bella?" He questioned imploringly, getting on his knees in front of me, holding my face gently in his hands. "Why do you think you don't deserve it?"

"Because I can't trust it. I can't let myself trust it. I'm completely and totally fucked up in the head, how can I deserve to be happy like that, in that way when someone else's happiness is depending on it, too?" I asked him desperately, trying to make him see, trying to make him understand that I wasn't worth it. "I'm unreliable, I'm selfish and I'm scared shitless because I can't trust myself not to fuck this up. And because I can't trust myself I can't trust anything else, I can't rely on this, I can't rely on you. I can't because every time I let myself, I get hurt. I'm selfish enough to throw this away because I'm absolutely terrified of getting hurt again."

I watched his face, the expressions of confusion, understanding, anger all morph from one to the other as he listened to me talk.

"I don't understand this sort of thing, Edward. I don't get it. I don't understand why I can't control it. I need to control it. I'm scared because I need to and I can't."

"Bella." He shook his head slowly, his brow furrowed and it wasn't until he brushed the wetness of my cheeks with his thumbs that I realised I had been crying. I was fucking crying again in front of him. I wiped my face angrily and he took my hands gently yet forcefully in his. "Listen to me." I looked up at his serious tone, his eyes blazing with some unrecognisable emotion. "I don't ever want to hear you say that you're not worth it. Because you are, you're worth this and so much more. When I look at you I see this amazing young woman, so capable of doing anything she puts her mind to."

I rolled my eyes, brushing the tears from my face again.

He took my chin in his hand and lifted my eyes to meet his. "I'm serious, Bella. You can do anything you want to do if you put your mind to it." His emeralds bored into my brown. "When I look into your eyes I see a beautiful, honest, fiery woman who's hiding something behind that incredibly stunning, strong yet vulnerable smile." He pressed a kiss to my forehead before leaning his own against mine. "Bella," he smiled incredulously, "you make me feel things I've never felt before and only someone amazing could possibly do that. I know these feelings are different and scary and uncontrollable, but they're exhilarating and passionate and pure. I know you're scared Bella, I'm scared, too. But we can help each other, I can help you, we can see where this goes because, honestly, I think _us_…" he shook his head, his eyes full of wonder, "_…_us _together_ would just be amazing. But…if you never try, you'll never know. And I want to find out, Bella, I want to know."

I sniffed as more tears fell from my eyes. "So the English teacher knows how to make a speech," I whispered.

He chuckled and I couldn't help but laugh through my tears as well, he leaned in to press a kiss to my temple. "What do you say?" He breathed, "You wanna try?"

I looked into his pleading eyes and wondered what it would be like to say goodbye to them. I frowned, not liking it one bit and took a deep breath before nodding. "Yeah. Yes I want to try."

The grin that lit up his face and brightened his eyes only resulted in my own smile as he hugged me to him, crushing his mouth to mine as I held his face close.

But we had to stop kissing, because we couldn't stop smiling. It was the best kiss of my life.

***FT***

"I can't believe I cried in front of you, again." I said as I chewed on a BLT. I was sat crossed legged, Indian style in his chair while Edward sat on his desk, his shoes off and feet on the arm rests swivelling the chair gently from side to side while he ate.

"Why?" He asked, after swallowing a bite.

I shrugged, "I don't cry in front of people. Ever."

"Ever?" His eyebrows rose.

"Ever. The last time I was fourteen."

He frowned, "You remember that?"

I nodded. It was hard to forget.

"What happened?"

My expression or perhaps something in my eyes must have indicated my darkening mood to him because he pulled the chair closer with his feet and kissed the top of my head, his hand cupping my neck, his thumb tracing patterns against my jaw. "You don't have to talk about it," he murmured, "it's okay."

I lifted my head to press my mouth to his and I moaned when his tongue traced against my bottom lip. I opened up to him, my sandwich falling from my hand to the floor as I reached up to run my fingers through his hair. He groaned as I sucked on his tongue and came up for air, gasping.

Edward pushed himself off the desk and onto his knees on the floor and I set my bare feet on the ground. He pressed open mouthed kisses all along my jaw, grazing my neck with his teeth – making me shiver – and worked his way across my collarbones and down my chest, his hands kneading my breasts. I whimpered.

He kissed down my covered tummy, removing one hand from my breast and bringing it to my ankle, trailing it up my calf. His fingertips traced circles in my thigh and I bit my lip to hold in a gasp.

He shook his head, moving back up briefly to pull my bottom lip away from my teeth with his own before soothing it with a kiss and moving back to his previous position. "I wanna hear you, baby." His voice was rough and husky and my panties dampened.

He kissed from my knee, up my thigh as I groaned at the delicious licks of his wet, warm tongue against my skin here and there.

He kissed just below my belly button again as his hands trailed up and under the skirt of my dress to pull down my soaked panties.

He grasped the black, lace boyshorts tightly in his hand, his thumb rubbing against the wet crotch of them. His eyes widened as he stared at them.

He glanced up at me as I watched him with a smirk.

"Are these…?"

I nodded, "The one's I wore that first night." I finished his sentence for him.

"Fuck me." He groaned.

I laughed and he smiled at me before gently pushing my legs apart and moving his hand to brush his fingers along my core, through the wetness to my clit.

"Uuuhh!" I couldn't stop the cry that escaped my lips.

His smile widened, "That feel good, baby?"

I nodded breathlessly, "So good."

He pulled his hand away and I whimpered in protest before he lifted his fingers to my mouth, brushing the wetness against my lips.

We gazed at each other, the lust in our eyes incredibly intense before he leaned forward and captured my mouth in his, sucking on my wet lips. I clutched at his hair tightly, gasping at the pure eroticism of the action as he groaned.

"Bella, you have no idea how perfect you taste."

I smiled, "I may now have some idea."

He grinned, chuckling against my lips before his head moved back between my legs and his mouth and tongue began doing indescribable things to the lips between my thighs.

"Oh!" I gasped, "Ohhh, my fuck." I couldn't help my hips from thrusting as I tugged at his hair, willing him to never stop whatever the fuck he was doing to me.

He lifted my legs a little so they were resting on his shoulders, his arms under my thighs as he held my arms to my hips, stilling them both with his hands. I whimpered with frustration of being restrained so crossed my ankles, bringing him closer with my legs.

I felt him chuckle against me and I moaned at the sensation the vibrations caused.

"Edward! Oh fuck, please, baby. Shit." He was thrusting his tongue in and out of my center the way he would with his dick and it felt so tantalisingly good, but he wasn't reaching the spot only he could, nor was he paying attention to my aching clit. I couldn't raise my hips, I couldn't move my arms, I couldn't do anything but moan and pant with tormenting pleasure and plead with him.

"Baby," I whimpered with desperation, "please, please, oh god I need to come, please."

It was building within me, I was so close, I was right there but I couldn't fucking get off. Edward was teasing me, and he was enjoying it.

My toes were curled, my hands were clenching and unclenching into fists and my whole body was trembling.

"Edward, please, I'm begging you!" I cried.

He let go of my hands and my hips, he moved his arms from under my thighs and pulled his fucking head away.

"Edward!" I whimpered pathetically.

"Shhh," he murmured, "just tell me what you want. Where do you want my hands, tell me where you want my mouth, Bella. Tell me exactly how you want it."

Fuck yes.

I pushed myself forward a little so my ass was resting on the edge of the seat, I could practically feel my pussy quivering with tension and anticipation. I placed my feet on his knees, leaning back a little on one hand, the other grabbed onto his hair.

"Mouth, clit." I gasped frantically, "Fingers, inside, please, I need them inside."

He groaned at my instructions as I pulled his head to my thighs.

I gasped when his fingers slipped easily inside my wet core and I cried out when he sucked on my clit.

I held his head to me tightly, tugging on his hair and try as I might I couldn't help writhing against his mouth and fingers.

"Fuck!" I screamed, when said fingers found that spot, that fucking spot.

He rubbed his fingers against it fast and his tongue swirled and flickered and sucked at my clit I could feel myself careening fast towards climax.

My cries of his name becoming higher in pitch, faster and closer together until my body could take no more pleasure and I exploded, tensing, holding him where he was, continuing his licks and stokes carrying me through my orgasm, taking me to my peak as I screamed through my clamped lips, and bringing me down gently, gasping and panting in exhaustion. Trembling in the aftershocks of pleasure.

He pressed soft and tender kisses to me, running his hands up and down my legs.

"Edward," I breathed, barely managing to keep my eyes open as I weakly tried to pull him up to me. He got the message and rose, taking my face in his hands, kissing me fully, his tongue flickering softly yet passionately against mine before pulling away and pressing sweet kisses to my face as I calmed.

He lifted me in his arms and sat himself on the chair, setting me down straddling his lap. I buried my face in his neck as my arms wrapped around his shoulders. He kissed my own shoulders, every now and then, pressing his lips to any bare bit of skin he could reach until I finally got my breathing under control.

I pulled back and pressed my forehead to his, taking his face in my hands, running my fingertips over the delectable stubble.

"That was intense." I murmured against his mouth.

He smiled, "You seemed to enjoy yourself."

I scoffed, "Yeah, well you teased me to the point of no fucking return."

He laughed, "I couldn't help it. I just wanted more. You taste so good and I fucking love doing that to you."

"Yeah, I don't mind it either," I shrugged nonchalantly. He gaped and then growled, tickling at my sides. "Stop," I laughed, "I was kidding! It was a joke." He finally relented and I smiled as he gazed at me. "It was amazing, I've never felt anything like it nor have I ever come so fucking hard in my life." He chuckled. "Thank you." I kissed him for a while before he pulled away, kissing my nose, making me crinkle it and in return making him laugh before doing it again.

"You're welcome." He murmured.

I ran my hands through his hair scratching his scalp and making him hum with pleasure as I kissed his neck, nibbling on the lobe of his ear.

"Mmm, is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" I grinned, grinding my hips against the hardness in his pants.

"Oh I'm just very fucking happy to see you." He groaned.

"Maybe I should thank you properly," I murmured as I shimmied off his lap and onto my knees in front of him. I grinned at our reversed positions. I palmed his hard on through his pants and he groaned, bucking against my hand.

I kissed him through his pants and he growled, "Fuck, Bella!"

"Frutrating, isn't it, baby?" I smirked.

"Not fucking funny," he panted as I teased the head with my palm.

I pulled his zipper down…and the bell rang.

"Fuck!" He cursed, running his hands through his hair before sitting up straighter and pulling me to my feet by my hands.

I glanced at the door to see shadows passing by as people made their way to class and then down at Edward's agonisingly frustrated expression.

He smiled up at me but I could see the tension in his eyes as he zipped his pants and tried to adjust himself.

I glanced at the clock before pushing him back in the seat and climbing onto his lap.

"Bella!" He gasped as I freed his erection again, "What are you doing?"

I pumped him in my hand and he clamped his mouth shut before a moan could escape. "We've got about five minutes before the warning bell," I whispered against his mouth, "There isn't a kid I know in this school who is sitting in their classroom before then, meaning we've got about three and a half minutes." I crushed my mouth to his, "I'm not gonna leave you hanging."

"We've gotta be quiet," he whispered shakily, his eyes squinting shut, his brow furrowing and his mouth gaping as I twisted my hand at the head before pumping back down again. "Fuck!" He whisper shouted.

"You're telling _me_ we need to be quiet," I held in a laugh.

He looked so fucking sexy as he rested his head against the back of the chair, his eyes closed, his brow furrowed in pleasure as he gasped through his teeth. I would have lowered myself onto him right then if we had more time than two minutes and he didn't desperately need release.

I kissed down his throat as I rubbed the four fingers of my left hand over his head, the thumb rubbing circles against the most sensitive part of his beautiful cock, just below the head while my other hand alternated between fondling his balls and stroking the rest of him.

"Fuck," he hissed, his teeth clenched as his hips bucked. I moved my hands faster until he was panting frantically. "Bella…uhh, fuck, Bella I'm gonna come, ahh _fffuck_, Bella. Shit!"

I quickly hopped off his lap not once halting my movement and took him in my mouth, sucking and swallowing as he lost it. He groaned low in the back of his throat as he tensed and let go.

"Fuck," he panted as I licked his slowly softening member. I stood and leant over him, kissing him much the same way he had kissed me and ran my hands through his hair, smoothing it to disguise his messy sexy hair as organised and planned to perfection sex hair – wouldn't want anyone to notice. I smoothed his shirt and straightened his tie and he fixed my skirt for me and he picked up the half eaten sandwich I had dropped on the floor, throwing it in the trash.

I pulled on my Vans and shouldered my bag as I picked up my panties from the floor. He stood pulling me into his arms and kissed me tenderly.

"Thank you," he smiled.

"You're welcome." He kissed my nose, I crinkled it and he laughed. I slid my panties into his pocket under the pretence of groping his delicious ass, my chin resting on his chest as I looked up at him. "I'll see you later."

He peppered kisses against my lips and murmured, "See you later, baby." He caressed my cheekbone with the backs of his fingers and kissed my forehead before turning me and patting my ass to send me on my way.

I looked back to him when I opened the door and smiled when his eyes popped wide open as his hand encountered my panties in his pocket. "Thanks for the help, Mr Cullen." I said, laughing as I pranced out the door, feeling his eyes staring after me.

***FT***

I, being the idiot that I was, didn't bother asking around to see if anyone fancied offering me a ride home.

Leah couldn't even be classed as an option.

So I found myself scowling as she drove past me, Seth in the passenger seat, tooting her fucking horn at me as I began my walk home. Bitch.

Being at home wasn't much better.

I poured myself a glass of OJ, right after I walked through the front door, to find Charlie and Sue sat at the table and Leah sitting on the counter by the sink. What was with all this meeting in the kitchen? Fucking family time? Wouldn't put it past Charlie.

"Bella, I think you should sit down." He said gravely.

Ah. So this wasn't family time, this was let's-make-Bella's-life-harder time. And Leah was here for the show. I could tell by her grin and the vindictiveness in her eyes. She was grounded for sneaking out last night so she was going to take particular pleasure in watching Charlie and her mom confront me about my "issues".

"No thanks, I'm good." I said, sipping my OJ.

Charlie sighed. "I think you owe us all an apology."

"You _all_?" I arched an eyebrow.

"Yes. All." Charlie held my gaze. "You embarrassed Seth needlessly and I think you should be apologising to Leah as well."

"What!" I asked incredulously. "Why should I be apologising to Leah? If anything I was going you two a freaking favour."

"There was no need to gang up on her like that." Sue said sternly.

I scoffed, "Ganging up on her _by myself_, you mean." I turned my glare to Charlie, "And you know for a fact that if our roles were reversed and Leah had been the one to tell you I had snuck out, she'd be fucking rewarded!"

"Language." Sue scolded. I rolled my eyes but otherwise paid no mind.

"It was unnecessary, Bella, and it's hardly encouraging sisterly affection."

I gaped. "_Sisterly_ affection? Sisterly _affection_! My god, I do hope your not holding your breath for fucking sisterly affection."

"Yeah, I wouldn't bother waiting." Leah piped up from her spot on the counter, "You couldn't pay her own sister – bound by blood – to offer Bella sisterly affection. I wouldn't count on it from me."

"Oh Princess, please, would you shut the fuck up!" I drawled.

"Enough!" Charlie slammed his hand on the table and stood. "Enough, Bella, I have had enough." His yells were ringing in my ears. "I thought you were going to try."

I laughed humourlessly, "Little miss princess over there practically said you couldn't pay her to cooperate and _I'm_ the one who's not trying."

"Leah is Sue's responsibility and you are mine."

"And yet here you _both_ are, lecturing me, while absolutely shit all is being said to Leah. Talk about fucking ganging up!"

Charlie took a deep breath, the fight seeming to leave him. He looked at me with pleading in his eyes. "I thought you were going to try, Bella, for this family. For _our_ family."

I stared, stunned into disbelief. I couldn't help it. After everything, _everything _that had happened with Renee in Florida and after everything that had happened since the wedding I was in complete shock that he could say that to me.

I shook my head slowly, coldly disregarding his silent plea, it was too fucking late for that. "No, dad," I murmured quietly, "this is _your _family. Not mine." And with his pained and shocked expression etched behind my eyelids, I turned and left the so called family, sitting in the kitchen.

"Bella-" Seth said softly, from where he had been listening on the stairs, but I paid him no attention. I didn't feel like being guilt tripped right now.

I closed my bedroom door behind me and stuffed my earphones in, slumping backwards onto my bed as Snow Patrol told me how I could be happy. Bullshit.

I grabbed Of Mine and Men out of my bag.

I fell asleep that night with my clothes on, without having eaten dinner, and thoughts of myself travelling all over the world and working on ranches, holding a large, wonderfully familiar, perfectly roughened yet soft hand as he whispered sweet nothings into my ear.

* * *

**So Bella and Edward are going to try :) Are we happy?**

**Bella's outfit can again be found of my blog - link on my profile. You can also find a trailer I made for this fanfic on there. Saw some on YouTube and thought I would give it ago because I was bored. **

**Review :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**At first I was having trouble with the chapter and actually planned to have more events happening within it because I was struggling so much but I was surprised to find I ended up having so much more to write in this chapter than I originally thought I had to leave all the other stuff that happens for the next chapter!  
It also shocked me that this is the longest chapter yet, so maybe I should "have trouble" more often.  
Anyway, rambling: over. A very tangtastic lemon at the end that I'm a little nervous about but I'll shut up now and let you see what you think :)**

* * *

Chapter Seven

Friday morning was as shitty as every other morning had been this week. I didn't dare go downstairs until I was sure everybody had left the house, but this didn't mean I couldn't escape Charlie when he came knocking on my door to "wake me up". He didn't need to. He knew I was already awake and ready to go. He just wanted an excuse to come and bitch at me some more.

"We didn't finish our conversation yesterday, Bella." He said gruffly as he sat on my bed.

I had my back to him but I could see his reflection in the mirror where I was pulling my hair into a pretty side bun. I fixed my makeup, and straightened my floating off-white tank paired with my high-waist shorts.

"I really thought we had. I, for one, feel like we cleared a few things up." I turned to my desk as Charlie sighed and began putting my notepad, Of Mice and Men and a few other books and essentials in my Union Jack bag. I bought it in Spain when we went there for the wedding. I thought it was pretty weird they were selling things donning the flag of a different country – not very patriotic but whatever.

Charlie watched me from his perch on the bed. "Do you really feel that way?" He asked softly.

"That we cleared a few things up? Yes. Yes I do."

"No, Bella," he said, exasperated. "Do you really feel that you're not a part of this family?"

I stopped what I was doing with a sigh. I could hear the worry and pain in his voice but I wasn't going to lie.

"What family?" I asked him as I turned to face him, pulling the bag onto my shoulder. "I can't see a family. That's probably because the only time you're all "happy families" is when I'm not there. Does that answer your question?"

His eyes searched mine. "Why?" He implored.

I rubbed my hand over my face, "I don't really feel like having this conversation right now. It's too early. How about we argue about this when I get back from school?" I headed for the door.

"Wait Bells," I paused, turning back to him, waiting for him to speak. "You…you know I'll never do what your mother did, don't you?"

I couldn't honestly tell him that I trusted him so I didn't say anything. Omission wasn't lying.

I left the room, walking down the stairs and I heard Charlie following.

"Your principle called yesterday." Dammit. I forgot about that. "I was going to tell you about it when you got home from school but…I thought we all needed to cool off."

"Great, so what's my punishment? Grounded for a month? A year? Locked into a room with Leah?" I cringed at the thought, couldn't even joke about such a thing.

"Nope. I'm driving you to school."

I spun round at the bottom of the stairs to face him, gaping at him in horror. "No freaking way."

He chuckled, "This is your punishment, Bella, it's non negotiable."

"But…but…" I searched desperately for an excuse… "But…!"

"You should be grateful." He said as he grabbed his keys and ushered me out the door. "You've got a free ride to school every day while Jacob is fixing up your truck."

"What?!" I gasped. "What do you mean Jacob is fixing my truck? Jacob who?"

"Jacob Black, of course." He opened the passenger door for me and slid me into the seat by my arm. I gave him credit for not sticking me in the back and telling me to mind my head.

"But he's an ass."

Charlie rolled his eyes and slammed my door, leaving me with my mouth opening and closing wordlessly like a suffocating fish.

I was already talking as he slid into the drivers side, "I don't want him touching my truck, he'll probably do something to it so the second I turn the ignition it blows up with me inside it." Okay, that may have been an exaggeration, but I had threatened Jacob not two days ago with telling everyone in the school how shockingly poor and inexperienced he was in bed. I somehow couldn't see him doing me any favours unless he was getting something out of it and a plot to murder me didn't seem so far stretched when added to the knowledge that he and Leah used to date.

"Stop being so dramatic Bella. He's a good kid."

"Pfftt!" I scoffed.

Charlie had started the cruiser and was starting to drive down the road.

"Okay dad, I've learnt my lesson. I'll never be late to lessons, again. Will you let me out now?"

Charlie gave a belly laugh, "Oh Bella, I'm not stopping this car until we're parked right outside your school."

"Yeah, okay. Very funny. Jokes over. Let me out."

Charlie glanced over at me with a smirk before flicking the switch on his door that locked the car.

And he was still driving. Oh my god. He was really doing this. He was really driving me to school. "You're serious?"

"Deadly." He nodded.

I could have cried. I shuffled myself down in my seat as far as possible though knowing it would do absolutely no good. Forks was a small town. Everyone knew exactly who Charlie was and they all knew I was Chief Swan's daughter.

Fuck my life.

"You know, nothing slows down traffic like a cop. You're probably just gonna _make_ me late – which I'm sure is exact opposite effect you were going for, so I'll just get out now."

"I've no idea what you're talking about, Bells. We're nearly there."

I think I let out a whimper as he pulled into the parking lot.

He unlocked the doors with a smile and I lifted my head to peek out of the window.

"Oh don't be such a baby." Charlie shoved my bag into my hands and leaned over to open my door. I threw him a glare as I unbuckled my seat belt and slipped out of the cruiser, slamming the door shut.

And then he wound down the window and shouted for all to hear, "Do you have your lunch money?" He grinned at my red face. "I'll be right here waiting when you come out of school. Have a good day!" He called as he drove out of the parking lot.

Face palm.

"What're you beating yourself up for?" Riley asked as he popped up beside me, watching with laughter in his eyes as Charlie drove away.

"You're real funny." I rolled my eyes and headed into school. Riley followed.

"I know, I'm a funny guy."

"Yep. I'm in stitches." My deadpan look had him laughing again.

"You know, no one can do sarcasm quite like you, Swan."

"What can I say? I'm talented." I opened my locker to transfer some books when a piece of folded paper fluttered to the floor.

Before I could grab it, Riley's swift fingers snatched it up and unfolded it.

"Hey!" I stole it from his hand and read the neat cursive script.

_Sorry, beautiful, I can't do lunch. Date tomorrow? E x_

"Who's E?" Riley asked.

My head snapped up, the smile that had been forming due to Edward's message was wiped away quickly in my panic.

Riley held his hands up defensively, "Relax, I didn't see anything else." I exhaled in relief. "So come on, who is he?"

"Mind your own," I muttered, placing the note in my Biology textbook and putting it in my locker.

"Ah, so he's a he?"

"Did I say that?"

"No."

"Shut up, then."

He laughed as I headed to English and he followed.

"So, I was wondering what you were doing tomorrow."

Rosalie passed by us, hand in hand with Emmett. I could tell Rose knew I was here by the tension in her shoulders and her complete unwavering point of looking directly in front of her and no where else. I felt my heart sink a little. Emmett shot me a small smile which I, in turn, ignored. I was pissed with him as well.

"What?" I asked Riley, remembering he had said something, as we stopped outside the open door of Edward's classroom.

"I was wondering if you were doing anything tomorrow?" He said. It took everything in me not to gape at him much the same way I had gaped at Charlie earlier. I don't know whether he took my silence as a good sign or a bad sign but he quickly stumbled on. "Alec is having a birthday party and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me?"

What the fuck was happening. This was _Riley_ for crying out loud! Was he asking me on a freaking date?! I could feel eyes boring into the back of my head and realised there was a chance Edward could hear this entire conversation. In my shock at Riley's offer and my panic at Edward listening in on some other guy asking me out I swerved around the big fat elephant right in front of my face. "I wasn't invited anyway?"

"Oh no, you were. Alec actually asked me to see if you could come."

Huh. Maybe I had judged Alec wrongly but if anything I would have thought he would have been the one running to kneel at my feet to ask me to come to his birthday party. He was one of the clingers.

"Oh. Well…uh, I actually have plans tomorrow. But you can tell Alec thanks for the invite." And I all but ran into the class, not daring to look back to see Riley's face.

Why was he doing this? We were _friends_.

I pulled out my Of Mice and Men book before looking up towards Edward's desk where he was sat, waiting for the rest of the class. Most of the girls were already seated and looking positively giddy – I was sure that was all due to the riveting nature of the novel we were reading and absolutely nothing to do with the sexy hot God of an English teacher.

Edward gave me a small smile – one that would seem completely innocent to anybody looking in from the outside, no one would suspect he was fucking me during lunch times. But that wasn't right was it? We weren't just fucking anymore, we were…_more_. I felt as giddy as those fucking giggling girls in the front row, at the word. More. Edward and I were _more_. We were _more _than just your average teacher and student. We were _more_ than friends. We were _more_ than just fuck buddies.

We were more.

The smile that spread across my face was bright and shining, much like Edward's eyes at the moment.

Oh yeah, he had definitely been listening to mine and Riley's awkward conversation and he had definitely heard me turning Riley down in favour of a date with him. Edward looked as giddy as I felt and that only widened my smile.

I pulled out my phone to send him a text.

_Eavesdropping were we, Mr Cullen? You know what they say about eavesdroppers. B-x_

But before I could hit send I heard, "Miss Swan." I lifted my head to find Edward looking at me with a stern expression though his eyes were glinting mischievously. "Your phone, please."

I narrowed my eyes. What was he doing? I mean, I knew he had to treat me like everyone else so as not to cause suspicion, but the guy could cut me some slack.

I stood with a sigh and made my way to the front of the class to hand him my phone, our hands brushed for a little longer than was necessary but it made me smile – discreetly of course, to unsuspecting students I was pissed to have my phone confiscated.

I slumped back in my seat, crossing my arms with a huff.

"You can have it back when the lesson is over." Edward said.

I simply picked up my book as he turned away from me, scolded those stragglers only just making it to class, and began the lesson.

***FT***

I took more time than needed when clearing away my things and putting everything I needed back into my bag, waiting for everyone to leave the class so I would get a chance to speak to Edward.

That didn't happen.

As I headed to his desk with a smile, his own grin reaching his ears, I was about to open my mouth to reprimand his ridiculous happiness at listening to me having turn down Riley when a knock on his open door stopped me in my tracks.

He really needed to keep it shut sometimes.

Coach Clapp walked into the room. "You ready for the meeting at lunch, Edward?" He stopped short when he saw me, standing awkwardly by the front row of desks. "Oh…err, _Mr Cullen_. Didn't see you there, Miss Swan."

I nodded in acknowledgment then drew my eyes to Edward who had paled.

Yeah, we were going to have to work on being a little more inconspicuous. If Coach Clapp had walked in not two minutes later that he did, who knows what sort of position he would have found us in.

"Could I have my phone back, please, sir?" I asked nonchalantly. At least, I hoped it was nonchalant. My throat felt a little dry and my shoulders a little stiff.

Edward cleared his throat, "Of course." He took it out the draw he had put it in and handed it to me. "And let that be the last time I catch you texting in my class, okay?"

I nodded obediently, "Yes, sir." And I had to restrain myself from sprinting from the room. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

I glanced down at my phone as I headed to Chemistry. It seemed Edward had been doing a little texting of his own.

On the same message, which I had intended to send to him, he had written, _Listen long enough they'll hear something bad about themselves? You can punish me tomorrow because we apparently have a date :D and I really don't like that Riley guy, by the way. I left my phone at home, that's why I put the note in your locker. So where are we going? X_

I smiled and decided to leave him a message for when he got home.

_Exactly. You've been very bad, Mr Cullen, and waiting until tomorrow is just too long. Call me tonight and I'll give you something to listen to ;) Oh, and La Push? First Beach? I know a place hidden away from prying eyes… X_

***FT***

The rest of the day was absolutely terrible. I had completely forgotten about the history essay due in for today which meant I would be spending Sunday doing that "or else" in the words of my teacher.

Rosalie and I also had a tiny little disagreement in Gym that included a fierce tennis match – so intense that everyone stopped to watch and our partners backed away from our court in fear of getting hit by a tennis ball flying at the speed of light or taking a violent hit from one of our racquets – and, there really hadn't been much need for the dispute to go further once I had clearly won the match with a ball that flew straight at her forehead, but Rosalie seemed to think otherwise.

Let's just say I was lucky I had any hair left on my head at all and man, that girl had some claws on her.

This meant my head was pounding as I headed miserably towards the cafeteria, completely and totally and utterly and thoroughly depressed that I wouldn't be spending my lunch time with Edward in his classroom.

I pulled my hair out of the bun, in hope that it would relieve my aching head, and let it fall down past my shoulders in waves.

Someone nudged past my arm as I was running my fingers through my hair, evening out the knots, and I growled angrily under my breath, cursing them. I was in a foul mood at having been kept from Edward, there was no need for these people to push their fucking luck.

In my annoyance I didn't realise that many people were rushing past me in the direction of the cafeteria. Nobody was usually this ecstatic to be getting out of lessons to lunch – they were still stuck in freaking school.

It was only then, as I neared the lunch hall that I heard the chorus of "Fight! Fight! Fight!"

I groaned, I was going to have to make my way through the crowd of moronic idiots and the couple of jocks who were probably fighting over some cheerleader's tits or something.

I rolled my eyes as I pushed through the crowd and saw Jacob Black in the middle of it. Fucking moron. My heart stopped when I saw Seth taking a beating on the ground.

"Seth!" I cried, pushing my way past the retards cheering Jacob on. Where the fuck were the teachers when you actually needed them? "Jacob stop it!" I screamed. He was on top of Seth, punching everywhere he could.

I grabbed the back of his shirt trying to pull him off when suddenly he shoved his arm back violently to throw me off and his elbow connected with the right side of my face.

I stumbled backwards clutching my face. Fuck that burned like a bitch. I could feel my eyes watering and knew that it was going to leave a bruise. My head was pounding and I felt dizzy. There was so much noise, people screaming, shouting, cheering, laughing.

"Fuck, Bella, shit. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hit you."

Jacob was in front of me. I looked past him to see three of Seth lying on the ground, swimming in and out of focus, blood pouring from his nose and mouth. I stumbled my way to him and knelt down next to him. I put my hand to my head, trying to stop the ground from spinning under me. I placed my other hand carefully on Seth's shoulder and he looked up at me, frustrated and pained tears swimming in his eyes.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Jacob?" I shouted, facing him. There were two of him now. "He's fucking fifteen years old, I told you to leave him alone."

I stood, wobbling slightly and I shoved Jacob, he barely stumbled. So I pulled my fist back and snapped it forwards, connecting with his nose with a sickening crunch.

"Fuck!" He swore, grabbing his nose.

"Hurts doesn't it, bitch?" I asked. Satisfied. Dickhead.

"Enough!" Came Mr Greene's shout.

He was here. I could feel him. I looked around to see him making his way towards us with some of the other teaching staff, trying to get the entire student body to walk away. His emerald eyes widened when he saw me in the middle of the mob, clutching my hand – it fucking throbbed, but that was okay because it meant that I hurt Jacob. Worry and concern bubbled in his eyes as he looked me over, going from my mussed hair, my sore, aching and probably bruised face to my stinging knuckles. His eyes turned to Jacob and they darkened dangerously.

"Everyone move!" Mr Greene yelled. Then he turned to us. "You three," the grey eyes glittered with anger, "are in serious trouble. Coach Clapp, please escort Mr Black to my office immediately. Mr Cullen, if you would take Mr Clearwater to the school nurse." He turned to me. "Miss Swan, why is it I always find you in the middle of everything."

I didn't answer, there were too many grey glittering angry eyes to focus on.

"Mr Cullen," Mr Greene sighed. Edward looked round from where he had been supporting Seth. "I think Miss Swan may be needing to see the nurse, too."

Edward's head snapped in my direction and I tried to get to him and Seth but the floor was suddenly coming up to meet me rather quickly. Then just as suddenly, I wasn't moving at all.

I looked around to see that Mr Greene had grabbed my arm just in time to stop my fall. Then Edward appeared in front of me. I looked over at Seth to see Mr Banner was helping him outside and heading around the corner towards the building of the reception and the nurses office. Edward pulled my arm over his shoulder and we followed.

Not before Leah's piercing screech reached my ears.

"Bella! What did you do to Seth?"

I groaned and let my head just hang.

"Miss Clearwater, let me suggest that you go see to your brother while us teachers will handle who exactly needs punishing." Edward. Always there to rescue me.

I didn't hear Leah's response but she must had left because as soon as we were around the corner of the cafeteria, hidden away from the prying eyes of the entire student body and all its teachers, Edward lifted me into his arms, bridal style.

"Shit, Bella, are you okay?" He asked frantically, kissing my temple.

I nodded and winced.

"I could kill that fucking moron."

I laughed.

"What?"

"I said he was a fucking moron, too." I frowned, squeezing my eyes shut tight. "Can we stop for a second?"

"Of course," he gently lowered me to the ground, my back leaning against the brick wall, and crouched in front of me. He brushed my hair away from my face and gently took my chin in his hand, turning my head to the left so he could look over the side of my face. "Fuck," he muttered, before pressing tender kisses from my temple to the rest of my bruised face.

"How are you feeling?" He asked gently.

"Pretty fucking pissed."

He tried to rein in his smirk. "I meant how's your head, your hand? Are you in any pain?"

"A whole world of pain, dizzy, seeing double, but I think I broke Jake's nose so that's okay."

Edward didn't bother trying to hold back his grin, "Yeah I saw that punch. It was pretty fucking awesome."

I laughed as he chuckled and pressed his forehead to mine. He let me sit for a while as he smoothed my hair, caressing my cheek and rubbing soothing circles into the hand of my throbbing knuckles. He guessed they were probably just bruised.

"Still dizzy?"

"A little," I murmured, "But I'm no longer seeing double."

"That's a good sign."

"No shit Sherlock."

"Wow. We are grouchy today, aren't we?"

I glared at the ground. "Yes. Yes we are when we completely forget to do essays which means we are going to get into a shit load of trouble with our parent – _singular_ no fucking "s" – and get into a fight with your ex best friend over a fucking tennis ball – which really makes your head hurt – only to have that pain enhanced by a fucking elbow to the face, knuckles to a nose with an asshole stuck to it, which is all concluded by a whole fucking day with no time to spend with you."

Edward looked absolutely stunned at my explosion, his eyes wide, eyebrows raised as a small smile crept across his face. He leaned his forehead to mine and said, "Okay. First of all, breathe." I took a deep breath, exhaling heavily with exasperation. "Second of all," his smile was getting wider, "have you missed me today, Swan?"

"Oh my god!" I threw my hands in the air. "That. That out of everything I just said, that it was you took from it?" I flushed with embarrassment. I hadn't actually meant to let that slip out and I was frustrated with myself for doing so.

Edward chuckled and kissed my nose making me crinkle it and in return making him laugh before murmuring, "I've missed you, too."

He had missed me. Edward Cullen, gorgeous, beautiful, Greek God, Edward Cullen had just told me that _he_ had missed _me_.

I couldn't help the coy smile and ducked my head to hide it. This only made him laugh again as he lifted my face by my chin and pressed a sweet kiss to my lips before sighing. "You are more lovely than you could ever imagine."

I rolled my eyes, lovely my ass. But I was secretly pleased. And I think he could tell.

"Come on, let's get you to the nurse." He tried to pick me up and carry me again but I wouldn't let him. After our close call this morning I was feeling a little more wary about keeping everything on the down-low.

We both settled for his arm wrapped innocently around my waist and mine over his shoulders as I still needed his support – the ground was still spinning a little too much for my liking.

As he sat me down carefully in the nurse's sick room, I looked over to see Seth laying, propped up, on the doctor type bed and I took the time to assess his injuries. They didn't look good. He had a big lump on one side of his forehead – which I assumed was from where he hit his head on the ground – a big black eye, his nose was pouring with blood and it looked as though his tooth had cut into his lip. That was just his face. I didn't even want to think about the bruises that probably covered the rest of his body.

"I told you to be careful." I sighed with resignation.

"Oh, please, Bella, this is your fucking fault." I hadn't even seen Leah sitting on the other side of the room.

"Language, Miss Clearwater." Edward's voice was cold and terse from where he stood by the side of my chair.

Leah looked bashfully rebuked but continued to glare at me.

Then the situation became even more bizarre as Charlie and Sue came bursting into the small room. It was starting to get really overcrowded in here.

"My baby," Sue sobbed as she rushed to Seth's side, all but shoving the highly qualified nurse out of the way taking the antiseptic wipe from her to tend to her son herself. "What happened to you? The principle said you were fighting, that's not true, is it, sweetie?"

"More like taking a beating." I said.

Sue's and Charlie's eyes turned to me, noticing I was there for the first time.

"And you're here too, are you? I suppose this has something to do with you, then." She indicated to Seth's injured form with her head.

Why the fuck was she blaming me? Her daughter was in here, too. Did that mean _Leah_ caused this, as well? Of course not.

"Mom-" Seth tried but Sue wouldn't let him speak.

"No, Seth, I won't have you covering up for her." She turned back to me. "So what did you do?"

When she got no response from me, due to my shock at being blamed for _this_, she became more agitated and I could feel Edward's body tense beside me. "What did you do?" She demanded. "My son has been nothing but wonderful to you, and this is how you repay him. Now, I want you to tell me exactly what you did to cause this."

"With all due respect, Mrs Swan, I would like you to know that Bella was not the cause of this. She was the one to put a stop to the fight, she didn't start it." Edward's hard voice, shaking with what I assumed was restrained anger, rang throughout the room leaving Sue spluttering for words, most likely thoroughly disappointed that she could find no way to pin this on me. I had never wanted to hug Edward more than I wanted to right at that moment. "And it seems to have escaped your notice, but your step-daughter was injured in the process of helping your son."

Charlie spun round to look at me, rushing to kneel in front of me, gently turning my face with his hand so he could look me over. At the same time, however, he had placed his other hand over my bruised one that had been resting on my knee and I winced. He pulled back quickly, his face filled with concern and panic.

"What's wrong, what hurts?" He asked frantically, his eyes darting all over my face and body, inspecting me.

"Just my hand." I murmured, showing him my bruised knuckles.

He frowned in question.

"Punched Jacob." I shrugged.

He failed to hide a grin, "That's my girl."

"She was complaining about her head hurting earlier. She said she was feeling dizzy and was seeing double. I think she may have concussion." Edward ratted me out and the need to hug him evaporated quickly.

Charlie sighed, "How many times have I told you not to try and break up boys' fights?"

I shrugged, "Seth was getting his ass kicked, I couldn't just leave him to be beaten."

Charlie shook his head but leaned in to press a kiss to the top of mine. This was the closest I had felt to my dad in ages.

"So you're saying that she shouldn't have helped Seth? She should have just left him to get beaten to death?" Sue was fucking hysterical.

Charlie stood, pulling away from me to move to put his arm around her shoulder.

My shoulders slumped as I leaned backwards in the chair, folding my arms around my body. I could feel Edward's eyes boring into me.

"Of course not, she just should have gone to find a teacher." Charlie soothed his wife.

Sue tutted and turned back to face Seth, wiping a tear from her cheek as she brushed his hair back. "I think we need to take him to the hospital."

Charlie nodded, "Bella needs to get checked out for concussion."

"I'm fine." I muttered.

"You're not fine, Bella and you're going to get checked out." Charlie said, his tone soft but ringing with finality.

Edward left the room after he was called out by Mr Greene before they both returned a moment later.

"Chief Swan, Mrs swan," Mr Greene addressed them, "Jacob Black has been suspended for two weeks and he is to write a letter of apology to both Mr Clearwater and Miss Swan before he is allowed to return to school."

"Thank God!"

"How old is he?"

"A letter of apology?!"

Sue, Charlie and Leah all spoke at once but it was Leah's voice that overrode them all.

"Why is Bella getting a letter of apology from Jacob, if anything she should be writing one to him for threatening him."

All eyes turned to me as I stared at Leah nonplussed. How the fuck had she known that?

But it all suddenly made sense. Maybe Jacob hadn't been phased at all by my threat of humiliating him in front of his friends, maybe I had just egged him on into hurting Seth. I felt sick. Leah was right. It was my fucking fault.

"Bella, is this true?" Charlie asked.

I nodded slowly.

"No it's not." Seth said from his spot on the bed. He winced a little as he sat up and Sue fussed over him. I stared at him. "At least, that's not the reason we started fighting. I was goading him. He was angry about me talking to his sister and I goaded him and it got a little out of hand."

Sue looked absolutely horrified that one of her offspring could do such a thing, Charlie was looking surprisingly relived and Leah was outraged. As Leah moved to stand by her mother's side and rant and rave – probably about me if her hand gestures were anything to go by – Charlie asked the principle his question again.

"How old is Jacob Black?"

"I believe he is seventeen." The principle said warily.

Charlie scowled and I knew Jacob had got off very lightly. Had he been born a few weeks earlier than he was, Charlie would be locking him into a jail cell right now.

"Still going to let him fix my truck?" I asked with a small smirk.

Charlie rolled his eyes but I could see a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips before Sue called to him and he rushed to her side.

***FT***

_You give me feelings that I adore  
__It starts in my toes  
__Makes me crinkle my nose  
__Wherever it goes  
__I always know  
__That you make me smile  
__Please stay for a while now  
__Just take your time  
__Wherever you go_

I rushed into my room from the bathroom, having just got out of the shower, smiling at the ringtone. I knew exactly who was calling.

"Hello?"

"Hey." I could hear the smile in his voice. "Are you okay? What did you the doctor say? Do you have concussion, are you in pain?"

"Yes I'm okay, yes I have mild concussion, no I'm not in pain and the doctor told Charlie just to wake me up every couple of hours and I should be fine. Happy?"

"Hardly," Edward grumbled. "You have a concussion."

"_Mild_ concussion. There's a difference."

"Mmm." He didn't believe me. "How's, uh…everything at home?" He asked gently.

"Ah, picked up on that, did you?" Well, my shitty home life was kind of hard to miss when it was glaring at you right in the face.

"Yeah. Is everything okay, are…are _you_ okay?" His voice was tender and it made me was to hug him again.

Hug. Seriously, what the fuck was wrong with me? I mean, you would have thought being the sexy god that he is I would have been thinking about a lot more than hugging, but these small, intimate actions kept creeping up on me.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I murmured. "Oh! And Seth was totally lying by the way."

"About what?" Edward asked.

"The whole goading Jacob thing. I knew there was no way Seth would have done that." And I went on to tell Edward everything Seth had told me when we got home from the hospital.

Apparently Seth had tried to tell me yesterday after my argument with Charlie and Sue, but in the mood that I was in I wasn't hearing any of it. He had tried to tell me that he had found out the whole Rachel thing wasn't my fault after all. He had scouted her out yesterday to pursue their relationship when she told him she had no idea what he was talking about when he spoke of my threat to Jacob, she had simply come to the same conclusion I had – that Jake was a scary guy and Seth was bound to get hurt eventually – she had noticed the venomous daggers he shot at Seth a couple of days ago at an innocent wave.

The kid had apologised profusely and I could see how terrible he felt I just had to forgive him. I was just relieved I hadn't been the cause for his heartbreak nor his whipped ass – Jake had seen the small kiss to the cheek he had given Rachel and had lost it.

"Jacob Black should be put on a fucking leash." Edward snarled down the phone.

I laughed, "Yeah, I second that."

"And Riley." He mumbled.

I laughed harder. "Riley is absolutely harmless." My voice turned silky and seductive, "You should know that though, because you were bad today, weren't you Mr Cullen, you were eavesdropping on my conversation."

"Mmm," he hummed, "that's true, I remember. In fact, I recall a message saying you were going to give me something to listen to."

I wriggled into a more comfortable position on the bed, my legs crossed in front of me, my back leaning against the headboard. I almost moaned at the tone of his voice, low and husky, I was getting wet already.

"Do you wanna know what I was doing right before you called?"

"What were you doing, baby?" Fuck, that voice! Rough and beautiful and so fucking sexy.

"I was in the shower." I heard his breath hitch. I folded my legs, Indian style. "You know what that means, don't you Edward?"

"Tell me."

"That means I'm sitting here, with water dripping down my warm, naked body." I purred.

He groaned, sending shivers down my spine. Goosebumps covered my skin.

"I can feel the water droplets, Edward. Just one. Running down my neck," I licked my lips as the drop of water I felt came into view. "It's falling over my chest…the curve of my breast…can you see it, Edward?"

"Fuck, I can see it, baby." His voice was strained.

"It's running over my nipple, they're so hard Edward, waiting for your hands, your mouth." My voice was soft and breathy as my chest rose and fell heavily. I could hear his own deep breaths on the other end of the phone. "It's still going, Edward. Down my tummy, getting so close…it's so light, so soft, like your fingers barely touching me, teasing me. Oh," I breathed, "it's running over my pussy. So wet. Aching for you."

"Fuck, Bella." Edward groaned. I heard rustling.

"What are you doing, Edward. Where are you? Tell me." My voice sounded desperate even to my own ears.

"I'm lying on my bed, Bella. I've got my boxers on and they feel so fucking tight."

"Are you hard for me, Edward?"

"So fucking hard."

I moaned, reaching my hand up to squeeze my breast, tease my nipple. "Take your boxers off, baby."

More rustling. "Done."

"Touch yourself, Edward, but lightly. Just with your fingertips, slowly up and down your length."

He groaned, "Shit. Play with your pussy, Bella, tease yourself for me. Don't touch your clit and don't put your fingers in."

I whimpered as I spread the wetness over the lips at the apex of my thighs.

"Touch your tits, baby," he rasped.

"I am, I'm squeezing my nipples."

"Fuck."

"Touch your balls. Squeeze them lightly, Edward. That's what I would do if I was with your right now. I'd tease you, I'd drive you fucking crazy."

"Oh, you are baby, you're driving me crazy with just your voice." He groaned. "Put your finger in, Bella, only a little bit. Rub nice, short strokes with your fingertip, in and out."

I did as I was told. "Ohh, Edward, you're killing me. I need more."

"Aahh, me too, baby."

"Stroke your cock. Slowly. Twist your hand at the head just like I did yesterday."

"Fuck, Bella. Add another finger," he panted.

I was gasping now, frantic for more, I couldn't do this much longer, I needed to come. I needed to hear him come. God I wanted to make him come, so bad. "Stroke you head, Edward," I gasped, "rub it hard. Fast."

He gasped out a moan as he did what I said. "Fuck, that feels so good baby. Find that spot, Bella, rub the spot that makes you arch your back and scream my name."

"I can't," I whimpered, "I can't without you, only you can."

"It's okay, sweetie," he soothed down the phone, panting. "Is your pussy wet, baby, is it wet for me?"

"So wet," I cried.

"Rub your clit, Bella, up and down, rub it, stroke it 'til you come, I wanna hear you come."

"Ughhh, Edward," my hips were rocking in time with my fingers.

"I'm close. I'm so close, Bella. Come with me, baby, please."

"Yes, yes, Edward I'm there. Fuck!" The pleasure coiled tighter and tighter until Edward grunted his release spurring on my own and I came with a cry, rubbing my pussy, imagining it was Edward's had, bringing me down from my high.

"Bella," Edward said seriously, his voice slightly slurred and relaxed, through his panting breaths. "You have the sexiest fucking voice on the planet."

I chuckled breathlessly, "I don't know about that. I reckon I could come from your voice alone."

"Hmm, we'll have to try that sometime."

I joined in with his laughter.

"So, La Push?" Edward asked. And just like that we could go from steaming hot, to happily warm and comfortable. I grinned as I pulled on a tank top and my flannel sleep shorts before climbing into bed.

"Uh huh, if that's okay?"

"Yeah that's perfect."

"Good. I wanna show you something."

"What is it?"

"You'll just have to wait, Mr Impatient."

He chuckled, "I can't fucking wait to see you."

"Me neither," I whispered as I turned off the lamp on my bedside table. I felt all warm and fucking fuzzy inside when he said that. "Can you pick me up, I still don't have my truck."

"Sure, but, err…won't your father and step-mother be home? I highly doubt Chief Swan would appreciate finding out that his daughter's secret boyfriend also happens to be her English teacher."

"My boyfriend? Is that what you are?" I wondered. I thought I would have been terrified at the word - we had never really labelled it before nor had I ever had a boyfriend before.

"If you want me to be. We're trying, right?"

"Yeah. Boyfriend." I smiled, revelling the word. Edward chuckled on the other end of the phone and I remembered our conversation before we got side tracked. "Charlie's working but Sue, Leah and Seth will be home. Could you just park around the corner from my house and I'll meet you?"

"Yeah, that's fine."

"Do you know where I live?"

"I may be new to this town but it's Forks, Bella, I knew everybody's life story before I could even unpack my stuff."

I laughed, "Sounds about right." I yawned.

"You should go to sleep, it's late, and you've got a hot date tomorrow." He chuckled.

I smiled, "Oh so modest."

"Well, I don't usually have to point out all my good traits to girls but I'm feeling the need to impress you."

We laughed as we remembered.

"You're so fucking cheesy." I grinned.

"You _know_ you like the cheese. _I_ know you like the cheese because you couldn't _resist_ the cheese."

"Oh trust me, it wasn't the cheese that got me into bed with you."

"Ah, so what was it? My good looks? My wit? My handsome face, my witty charm?"

I rolled my eyes, "You'll never know. Goodnight, Edward."

"Goodnight, Bella. Sweet dreams."

I was asleep in seconds, wrapped up in the safe warmth that was Edward's voice.

My boyfriend's voice.

My boyfriend.

I smiled.

I loved his voice.

* * *

**And there is chapter seven. And there date is the next chapter! I'm very excited for it I hope you are too :)**

**Was the lemon okay? I'm very nervous about it so let me know.**

**Bella's outfit can be found, once again, on my blog and the link in on my profile.**

**Review :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello, I have a very long chapter for you! One that I enjoyed writing a lot. A lot is revealed in this chapter so I am hoping you will all be happy with it! **

* * *

Chapter Eight

I woke before the alarm on my phone even had the chance to chime and I skipped down the stairs and into the kitchen to fix myself a bowl of cereal. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and I had a date with Edward freaking Cullen, life was so, so good.

And then there was Sue.

I was sitting on the counter, gazing out of the window at the beautiful morning outside, swinging my legs, rocking my body and humming along between munches to the song on the radio, when Michael Buble's beautiful voice suddenly stopped right when he was about to tell me I was his minute of his everyday.

I looked up to find Sue with her hand on the radio, having just switched it off, before she went to pour herself some coffee.

"I was listening to that." I frowned.

"That racket will wake up Leah and Seth." She said, sitting herself at the table and opening the newspaper Charlie had probably left on the table earlier this morning.

I had made sure the music wasn't too loud knowing Seth's head was most likely still aching from yesterday, but I didn't say anything. I wasn't going to argue and let Sue spoil my good mood.

I hopped down from the counter, washing my bowl and putting it away before heading towards the door.

Sue stopped me.

"I'm going to need you to help me today."

I turned to face her with a frown, "I have plans."

"You'll just have to cancel."

I gaped. "What exactly do you need help with?"

"Just a few errands and some chores about the house. Seth was going to help me before that fiasco yesterday, but you'll have to help me, instead."

"Well, like I said, I have plans."

Sue looked up from the newspaper for the first time to look at me with an infuriatingly calm expression. "And like I said, you'll have to cancel."

"Why can't Leah help you?"

"She's still in bed."

I stared. "I'm not going to cancel, I'm going out with a friend, I'm not going to let them down when there is absolutely no reason to. Especially when it's simply because Leah is too damn lazy to get out of bed."

"Leah has just spent a very hardworking first week back at school, she needs her rest." Sue put the paper down, leaning her forearms against the table, her hands clasped together in front of her.

"And I've been off picking flowers, then, have I?" I couldn't believe this woman.

"No, Isabella, you've been causing trouble all week. The least you can do is help me out with a few small chores, today."

My voice turned hard and cold. "Don't call me that."

"That is your name," she said, "it is the name your father gave you and that is what I shall call you."

"No," I clenched my fists trying to hold back my anger, "that is the name my mother gave me. You are _not_ my mother."

"I don't know what I have done to make you hate me so much. Why don't we have a chat, hmm? Why don't you give me a chance to be the mother you never had. To be the mother to tuck you in at night and read you bedtime stories instead of throwing you away, throwing you at your father so I don't have to deal with you." Her tone was calm and light. It held an air of forced innocence and I realised what she was doing. She was fucking playing me. She was trying to goad me into screaming and shouting and arguing with her so she could run off and bitch about me to Charlie. She would play the oh so innocent step-mother, only wanting to bond with her new daughter and I would be the villain, the wicked step-daughter who hurled abuse at her kind, caring, substituted mother.

I wasn't taking the bait.

"No thanks, I'm good. Have a good day though, I'll see you at dinner."

As I rushed upstairs to get ready, I focussed on what I was going to wear, pushing Sue to the back of my mind. I couldn't let her ruin today, for me. I wouldn't. Today was mine and Edward's day. So that was all I was going to think about.

Now, what to wear? It was our first official date I had to look good.

Fuck I was turning into such a pathetic giddy girl. And I sort of liked it.

I had packed my white and blue stripy rucksack full of everything I would need last night before my shower and before mine and Edward's fucktastic phone sex. Never in a million years would I have ever thought I would have been having phone sex and experiencing it as though it were actually physically happening – but that's what Edward could do to me. I laughed to myself, forget phone sex, if anyone had told me a month ago I would be going on a _date_, with _my boyfriend_ no less, I would have referred them to a mental hospital.

How things could change.

I did a mental checklist as I rummaged through my closet for something to wear when a thought popped into my head and I quickly rushed to grab my bag, pulling out my Nikon D5200 camera. This baby was my most prized possession and I'd almost had a panic attack when I thought it wasn't charged but all was good. I sighed in relief as I put it carefully back into my bag and skipped back to the wardrobe.

I chewed on my bottom lip before my eyes fell on the perfect item.

I grinned as I grabbed it and pulled it on over my blue patterned bikini, tying it into a knot at my hip, and a pair of dark blue, low-rise denim shorts. I had let my hair dry naturally last night and I decided to leave it as it was, flowing around my shoulders in soft, fluffy waves – the perfect beach look. I didn't bother with make-up knowing it would wash off in the water anyway.

My phone chimed with a text.

I pulled it from my bag and smiled when I saw it was from Edward.

_I'm round the corner, baby x_

I grinned, replying with a quick message telling him I was coming as I slipped on a pair of turquoise ballet flats, grabbed my bag and a small key hidden in my desk draw and pranced down the stairs, ignoring the call from Sue as she rushed out of the kitchen to stop me.

The door slammed in her face before I heard more than "Your father will-"

Yes, I'm sure Charlie would be hearing about my horrendous disobedience but I really couldn't find it in me to care, not when I saw Edward sitting in a fuck sexy black car just around the corner from my house.

I gaped as he wound down the window on the passenger side. I leaned down to look in. Leather seats. Beautiful. Edward was smirking in the drivers seat, probably at my watering mouth.

"This car is fucking orgasmic."

Edward chuckled, leaning over and pushing the door open for me. "Good morning to you, too." I climbed in.

I smiled into the kiss he placed on my lips as I pulled on my seatbelt.

"Mmm," Edward hummed, pulling away. I watched as his eyes roved over my body and practically popped out. "Is that…?"

I smiled seductively, "Mmhmm."

"My shirt. I thought I left it in Spain."

"Nope. I stole it."

The wondrous smile slowly spread across his face before his mouth was suddenly on mine again, his tongue flicking at mine deliciously.

After a full minute of this little piece of perfection I reluctantly pulled back. "Are we going to La Push or are we going to make out in your car all day?"

Edward shrugged, "I don't mind either."

I rolled my eyes, pushing his shoulder playfully as I sat round in my seat properly, "Come on, drive. I wanna see if this car rides as sexily as it looks."

He chuckled as he started the engine and I barely felt a fucking thing aside from the very slight, very gentle vibration of the purring engine. I wanted to whimper.

As he pulled away I murmured huskily, "We are definitely having sex in this car."

He groaned, "Jesus, Bella. You can't say shit like that to me when I'm driving."

I smiled, "Sorry." But I wasn't.

"You're not fucking sorry." He growled and I laughed.

"No, you're right. I'm not."

"Good." I looked at him as he glanced at me, lust in his eyes. "I'm holding you to that promise."

We spent a few comfortable moments in silence as he drove and I revelled in the car, running my hands over the perfectly cool leather seats.

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you were more willing to spend some quality alone time with the car rather than have me join in."

"You're not far from the truth." I laughed at his scowl. "What sort of car is this, anyway?"

"Aston Martin, Vanquish."

"How much was it?"

"A lot."

"How…never mind."

His eyes darted to me before turning back to the road and taking a turn. "What?"

"Nothing, it doesn't matter."

"Bella," his voice was soft but firm, "you can ask me anything."

I bit my lip, not wanting to be rude. "How…how can you afford it?"

To my surprise he actually laughed. "It was a present."

My eyebrows rose, "From who?"

"My grandfather."

"Wow. That was generous."

Edward smiled, "Yes, it was." There was something behind that smile that made me think he was grinning at some secret, and I wanted to be let in on it.

"What?" I asked, smiling myself, his own was contagious.

"It's complicated." He said as pulled the car into the lot and parked. He climbed out of the car but before I could do the same he was around my side, opening it for me. I felt a tightness in my chest, but it was a good feeling, like my heart was swelling in my chest or something.

He shut the door behind me and locked the car before shouldering his own bag. Then he took my hand.

And I felt like my heart was about to explode. I dropped my head, looking at the ground as we walked. I felt his eyes on me and heard his chuckle before he kissed my cheek, wrapping his arm around my waist.

It felt so much like that first meeting and I couldn't help placing my own arm around his waist and holding myself tighter to him.

We found a spot to sit and Edward and I both ended up pulling out blankets to sit on. I laughed, "Well prepared, I see." I stuffed my own back in my bag and sat myself down on Edward's, kicking off my shoes and lying back.

He gave half a shrug, "Least I could do, considering."

"Considering what?" I asked, suddenly distracted as I looked up at him. He was wearing dark jeans, and a light blue button down shirt, the first few buttons were open and the sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. His hair, though still screaming fuck-me-now, hadn't tried to be tamed with gel; it was left to be the beautifully disarrayed mess that it was. He looked fucking delectable. There was something about seeing him dressed so casual that made my lady parts stir. It was such a difference compared to his formal school attire – not that I was complaining, of course, man was he sexy in slacks and a tie – but the change was nice. He looked even younger in casual clothes, he looked more free and relaxed and he looked fucking gorgeous.

His eyebrow arched as he caught my eye. Crap. I blushed. I fucking blushed. He laughed, sitting down beside me, leaning over me on all fours, to press a kiss to my lips.

"Considering you were the one to suggest the location and apparently have something to show me."

I outright laughed, "Real subtle, Cullen."

He shrugged, his eyes bright, his smile eager.

I rolled my eyes murmuring, "Later." I was suddenly nervous. Showing him was like almost very nearly opening up to him completely. Nearly. Not quite. But was I ready even for _nearly_?

"Okay," he said simply, lowering himself to his stomach and leaning on his elbows. That was easy. I looked at him carefully and could still see the eagerness in his eyes but he seemed to be reining it in. And then I realised. He must have seen I was nervous, he must have sensed my hesitance – he didn't want to pressure me.

I got that tight feeling in my chest again.

I lifted my hand to run my fingers through his soft hair. His own hand cupped mine, holding it to his face and he lowered his mouth to my wrist, inhaling deeply pressing his lips to my wrist in a tender kiss.

"This is pretty," he murmured. He fingered the three strands of my black leather Pandora charm bracelet.

"Thank you." I breathed.

"Where did you get it?" The light breeze from the sea was rushing through his hair. He looked like a freaking model.

"My sister gave it to me." I murmured absently.

Edward's eyebrows rose so high they almost disappeared. Fuck. I didn't mean to say that.

"Leah gave this to you?" His voice was understandably incredulous.

I shook my head, swallowing thickly. His eyes watched my face intensely and I found that I couldn't break eye contact. There was something about the emerald orbs that were willing me to trust him, pulling me in.

"What's her name?" He asked gently.

"Victoria." My voice sounded small, even to me.

"Is she older or younger?"

"Older."

"Do you get along?"

I shook my head slowly.

"Does she live with Charlie?"

I shook my head again, "She lived with my mom but she's probably got her own place now. I don't know, we don't talk."

Edward's eyes widened, "At all?"

"No."

"When was the last time you spoke to her?"

"When I was fourteen."

I watched him carefully, as he frowned, to see if he would make the connection. He was a smart guy. He did.

"The last time you cried in front of someone." It wasn't a question, nor was it directed at me, the murmur seemed to be more to himself as his eyes moved to the fiddling of a strand of my hair. He was rubbing it between his forefinger and thumb. "Why do you still wear the bracelet?" He asked. My strand of hair was now being curled around each one of his fingers individually.

I sighed. Could I really tell him? I didn't think I was ready. Then his eyes moved back to mine and once again all I could feel was the security that surrounded me whenever I was with him. Looking in those green eyes I felt like nothing else could touch me. So I decided to answer his question. No more.

"She gave it to me before we stopped talking. We were really close before… right up until the age of fourteen we were as thick as fucking thieves, despite the age gap. She's six years older than me. I guess…" I frowned looking away. I felt his thumb smooth the crease between my brows and glanced back up to find myself once again swimming in his eyes. They were calm, slightly troubled due to my anguish, curious, intrigued but not pressing. They gave me the confidence to continue. "I guess I wear it when I miss her. The old her. Before the silence. When I moved to live with Charlie when I was fifteen I threw it in the back of my closet. I didn't take it out again until Charlie got engaged. That was nearly two years later."

The backs of Edward's fingers were now caressing my cheekbone – the bruised one, gently – offering me comfort. It must have been fucking working because I felt I would fall apart right that second if he pulled away.

"You were wearing it the night we met." He said softly to which I nodded. "Is Victoria the reason you moved to live with Charlie?"

"Partly," I said.

He accepted this as an answer, not pushing for more. I was grateful.

"Why haven't you got any charms on it?" He asked, moving to a slightly lighter topic.

"Well she gave it to me for my fourteenth birthday so there was very little time in between…"

He nodded in understanding. Edward leaned down, brushing his nose up and down along mine, his forehead pressed to my own as he placed a sweet, gentle kiss on my lips.

"The car was more of an unspoken reward in the disguise of a gift." Edward said softly, playing with strands of my hair again.

"From your grandfather?"

He nodded then smiled at me a little sheepishly, "You know…my name technically isn't Edward Cullen."

I froze. What the fuck. "Huh?" Was my genius response.

Edward's eyes widened at my horrified expression, "No, no, no don't worry I'm not some axe-murderer with a new identity or something. I just chose to go by a different name."

I just stared, totally confused.

"I'm not explaining this very well," he sighed. "My real name is Edward Masen. Edward Anthony Masen. But when I got the interview for the position at Forks it was clear that Richard…sorry Mr Greene," he smirked and I rolled my eyes, "hadn't actually looked at my resume yet and I found myself telling him my name was Edward Cullen rather than Masen. After he realised that wasn't actually my name he questioned it and I just told him I would prefer to go by Cullen."

"Okay…" I said slowly. "…Am I just being a complete idiot or does this not make any sense at all because I'm really not understanding this, Edward…or axe-murderer, whichever you prefer to go by."

Edward rolled his eyes. "When I saw you that evening on the beach, there was something about you…" he shook his head, and as I looked into his eyes I could see that he wasn't with me at all, he was remembering. "I don't know, something about you just drew me in. You were charming, funny, and seemed without a care in the world. I wanted a little piece of that and I knew I could be that way with you."

"Despite the fact that I was a stranger." I said bluntly, the sarcasm was rich in my voice, though it seemed to be completely lost on him as he reminisced.

"That was part of the draw. You were like no one I had ever met, you were a whole new experience for me and in the few seconds in which you fell into my arms I felt like a completely different person. I felt like I was the person I _wanted_ to be. And so instead of giving you my real name I gave you the name I wished I had." When his eyes met mine again I could see he was back. "You see, my parents are practically made of money-"

"Masen, Masen…" I murmured, frowning, my brain working a mile a minute, I'd heard of that name. This knowledge combined with Edward's words _my parents are practically made of money._ "Masen as in…?"

Edward nodded gravely, grimacing.

"Masen & Sons? Masen & _Sons_? Your parents own the law firm Masen & Sons?!" I asked incredulously. Masen &Sons was the largest law firm in America. It had offices in a ridiculous amount of states and though I was no expert in the workings of law firms even _I _knew that this one was huge.

"Well, technically my father does. It was passed down to him from his father."

"Your grandfather?"

"Not the one you're thinking of. The grandfather who gave me the Vanquish is my mother's father, I was named after him."

"Right," I said. "Continue."

"My parents, John and Elizabeth Masen, while able to offer me anything a child could possibly want, were severely lacking in the actual parenting side of things. My mother, who also came from money, wasn't exactly the mothering type – preferring to spend her time on lunch dates and shopping for gowns for the upcoming benefit balls and whatnot. My father, always busy with the firm, leaving before I woke up in the morning and returning after I was in bed, hardly had time to say hello to me let alone throw a fucking ball with me."

Edward was becoming more agitated as he spoke and I wanted to take away the torment that was appearing in his eyes. I ran the fingertips of my bruised hand softly over his features, smoothing his worry lines and glancing over his lips as though offering a kiss without physically doing so. My actions seemed to relax him some and I felt a little satisfied.

"My father wants to pass the firm onto me. That's what he's always wanted. And I've suspected from time to time that the only reason my parents had me was so they had an heir to their _thrown_ so to speak. An heir to pass onto their kingdom of money and success." He sighed as I ran my hands through his hair again, tugging a little and scratching soothingly the way I knew he liked it. "He disliked my interests in literature and music. He thought they were pointless pursuits but humoured me anyway, putting me through college then for the years training for teaching in hope that he could bribe me into attending law school afterwards and taking the firm from him when necessary."

What a horrible way to be brought up. And I thought my sort-of-family was bad. At least I had a sort-of anything, Edward's family seemed to be practically non-existent throughout his childhood. The image of a copper haired, green eyed little boy, sitting alone in a big, empty quiet house reading a book while glancing frequently up at the door hit me with full force out of nowhere. And it made my body hurt everywhere. It made me ache and want to cry for the little boy.

I sat up, pushing Edward gently with my hands so he laid on his back and I took his previous position, leaning over him, and I pressed small kisses over his face. Across the smoothness of his forehead, his temples, over his perfectly stubbled jaw, between his eyebrows and down his nose. He closed his eyes as I delicately kissed his eyelids, eventually pressing a warm kiss to his lips, tenderly.

He smiled softly and I once again felt satisfied that I had eased his anguish a little and wholly satisfied that I had managed to put a smile on his face.

"My aunt moved just on the outskirts of Forks recently, her husband is a surgeon who treated Mr Greene's wife. She told him about the spot for an English teacher that had opened up at Forks High School and he told me about it straight away, much to my father's distaste. I don't think he ever believed I was serious about teaching English until the day I left Chicago, by the time he thought it was necessary to put up a fight it was too late."

After a pause in which I stroked my hand over Edward's chest as I pondered thoughtfully and his hand traced the contours of my back I asked, "How does the car come into this?"

Edward smiled. "I spent a lot of time with my grandfather when I was a kid. He had always hated my dad – he can't stand lawyers. He was a doctor, had his own practice and everything. The car was pretty much a reward for going after what I wanted and ultimately defying my father."

I laughed, "He sounds like a cool guy."

Edward nodded. "He is." He took my hand from his chest and pressed kisses to my slightly purple knuckles.

"Why did you wish you had the name Cullen?" I questioned.

"My mother's sister, Esme, she's the one who recently moved to Forks, married Carlisle Cullen, the surgeon who told me about the job. My grandfather couldn't look after me all the time because he was still running his practice at the time so Esme practically raised me along with my cousin. She and Carlisle were more of a mother and father to me than my parents ever were. I watched how they looked after and cared for Alice, Esme used to be a chef before she had her and she gave that up when she and Carlisle started trying for a baby because she was completely devoted to being a mother. And though Carlisle's job was just as demanding as my fathers he still managed to spend time with his daughter and even me, though that wasn't really a big issue because I was around their house almost as much as Alice was. Maybe even more, in fact, as Alice wasn't born until I was three. Esme doted on me as well because for a long time she thought she was unable to conceive."

Edward watched me patiently as I took in all this information. "And so that's why you told me you were Edward Cullen. You always felt like you were one of them and always wished you truly were."

He nodded.

"They sound like amazing people."

"They really are. Alice, particularly. I think I may have told you she was my sister that first night I met you."

I nodded as I recalled, "Yes, you did."

"Well, I guess that's how close we are." He shrugged.

I laughed, "Well, I'm pretty sure you told me something along the lines of her driving you crazy."

He grinned sheepishly, "Don't all siblings."

I hummed my agreement, thinking particularly of the time when Victoria took away my Barbie doll that had once upon a time been hers. She told me only babies played with Barbie's so I couldn't possibly want it. Me, being the naïve four year old that I was, believed my sister was watching out for me and doing me a favour. That was, of course, until I caught her playing with it in her bedroom.

One big ass tantrum ensued, inevitably, until Renee had taken the doll away from both of us and wouldn't give it back until we learned to share.

I laughed as I remembered and Edward glanced at me in question.

"My sister and I almost always ended up teamed together against my mother. In all the confusion over who's Barbie's was who's and who's dress was who's, Renee always ended up being the villain and Vicki and I wouldn't stop until we got what we wanted. Which oddly enough usually meant joining forces. I never realised until now that that was probably exactly what my mom was hoping for." I laughed harder, "If we had known that I doubt we would have spoken to each other for days just to make a point."

My smile slowly faded as what I said really registered. Forget days, Victoria and I hadn't spoken in years with the exception of a few terse words exchanged by pure accident the other day.

Edward sat up and moved me to straddle his lap, crossing his legs Indian style underneath me. "Thank you," he breathed, pressing a kiss to my nose making me crinkle it. He laughed quietly.

"For what?"

"For telling me about your sister. For letting me in just that little bit more."

I smiled and felt the overwhelming need to express to him my gratitude; for telling me about his parents, his childhood, for making me feel safe enough to tell him about Victoria without the pressure and for making me feel so cherished and cared for after I had.

I shook my head. "No. Thank you." I pulled myself closer to him by with my feet hooked around his back, my arms wrapped around his neck. My fingers ran through the hair at the nape of his neck as I slowly pressed my mouth to his. The kiss was soft and tender, expressing to him everything I couldn't say because there were simply no words for how much gratitude I had for him. Not only had he made me feel safe enough to tell him some of my secrets, but he showed me how safe he felt with me by letting me get to know a little more about him.

"Marie." I whispered against his lips.

"Hmm?" He breathed.

"You told me your name is Edward Anthony Masen. Marie is my middle name."

The smile that lit up his face was sweet and held an air of innocent pleasure. "Marie," he rolled it over in his mouth, tasted the way it felt on his tongue, vibrating against his lips. "Isabella Marie Swan."

A shiver ran up my spine and he grinned.

One of his hands ran its away down my back and along my side to my tummy. I swallowed thickly as his eyes bore into mine and I couldn't look away, I was frozen, captured in the gaze of my predator. The hand drifted lower and lower until he was cupping my sex.

I bit my lip, and my breathy voice was shaking, "Edward, we're on a public beach…again."

He smiled seductively as he popped the button of my shorts with one hand, the other grasped the ends of my hair at my back, tugging gently. I let my head fall back and his lips were at my neck as his hand slipped into the panties of my bikini. "There's absolutely nobody around, Bella. And you can't tell me this isn't turning you on. Because I know it is." His fingertips brushed against my clit with the last few words and I whimpered.

His wet tongue flicked the lobe of my ear before he grazed it with his teeth making me gasp as his fingers continued their ministrations. "Such a dirty girl," he growled, "anyone could catch us out here." My hands grasped at his hair tightly. He chuckled, "You like that, don't you, Isabella," he purred and it wasn't a fucking question, nor did my name rolling off his tongue deliciously cause me the anger that it had done earlier this morning. "You like the idea of someone watching, yet having no idea what I'm doing to you. Having no idea how I'm touching you, how I'm stroking your pussy."

"Fuck." My whimper was hardly above a whisper as I muffled my mouth against his neck, my fingernails now digging into his shoulders.

"To anyone looking at us right now we just look like a sweet, innocent, embracing couple." His free hand tugged at the knot I had made with his shirt at my hip, letting it fall open before extracting it from my body. "If only they knew," he chuckled, pulling away his other hand from my now aching core and rolling forwards so I was now lying back on the blanket. He started to tug down my shorts. "If only they knew what a devious, sexy little minx you are."

I kicked the shorts from my feet as he sat up on his knees, undoing a few more buttons on his shirt before reaching back and pulling it over his head. His eyes were locked on mine as his hands went for the zipper on his jeans. "If only they knew you're biting your lip to stop yourself from screaming. To stop yourself from begging me to take you, right here, right now for the world to see." He stood over me slowly, pulling down his jeans, revealing a navy pair of board shorts with white and turquoise stripes. Then he lowered himself on all fours over me, his finger trailing down my cheek, down my neck over my bikini covered breast and down my tummy, causing goosebumps to rise up all over my skin. His hand reached the tie of my bikini bottoms at my hip and paused, he leaned down his mouth right beside my ear, his sweet breath washing over me like a summers breeze. "If only they knew how much you want me to thrust into that wet, aching pussy of yours until you're arching your back in pleasure." My eyes fluttered shut of their own accord as he pressed his lips to mine. Our mouths brushed as he spoke again, "Too bad I just wanted to go for a swim."

And suddenly he was gone.

My eyes flew open and I sat up, spinning round to see Edward jogging lightly towards the sea. He turned, walking backwards, grinning at my gaping mouth cockily.

"You bastard!" I stood and ran after him. He roared with laughter as he turned and sprinted to the sea.

Water sprayed up around him as he ran nearly to his knees into the sea and he looked like he was taking part in a fucking swimsuit photo shoot, which would have mad me jump his bones had he not just done what he did.

Instead I jumped onto his back, which did not have the desired effect. He didn't fall into the water like I had hoped, instead he spun me around, holding onto my legs around his waist, laughing at me as I laughed through my screams clinging to him, not wanting to be dropped into the freezing cold water.

When I didn't fall from his back he glanced over his shoulder at me with a wicked grin. "Do you need a little cooling off, Miss Swan? Did I get you a little hot and bothered?"

Then he began wading further into the water.

"No!" I squealed, tightening my arms and legs around him for all the good it would do.

"Oh, I think you do." He laughed.

I gasped out as the water reached my hips and we were still going further.

"Cold! Cold! Cold!" I cried as Edward swung me round so I was facing him, still completely wrapped around his body.

"Feeling better?" He asked playfully.

"That was so mean."

"Which part, leaving you hanging or dragging you into the water?"

"Both," I growled.

He chuckled, pressing a kiss to my nose. I crinkled it. He laughed.

"Why do you do that?" I wondered.

"Because you look so fucking cute when you wrinkle your nose."

I rolled my eyes, "You laugh at me."

He shook his head, "You look innocent." He murmured.

I arched an eyebrow, "You saying I'm not?" But he couldn't have been further from the truth. I wasn't fucking innocent.

His brow furrowed and he held me a little tighter, "That's not it. It's just you always look like you're carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. You crinkle your nose and your eyes light up when I do that, I like it, you look younger, carefree."

I laughed, brushing off his comments, "You really need me looking any younger?"

He smiled but it was a little strained, "I mean you look your age. Your eyes…they look decades older than what you are when I see you around school. And man, when your father and step-mother came into the nurses sick room…" He shook his head. "Your eyes, they looked like you had aged ten years."

"It's because I'm oh so wise about the world." I tried to tease, I tried to get out of this conversation. I didn't like it.

"It's like they've seen things that most people your age haven't. Hell, like most people my age haven't." He murmured, seemingly to himself. But then he smiled, brightening. "But they sparkle when I do this."

He kissed my nose again. And I couldn't help it. I crinkled it. Fucking habit. But it made Edward smile and it apparently made my eyes light up so who was I to complain. Not to mention I had noticed it before.

It was his fucking ringtone for God sake. Not that he knew that of course.

"How many years do you think I would lose if I did this?" I brought my hands to the top of his head and dunked him.

He came back up, flicking his wet hair from his face looking like a fucking supermodel.

I was already swimming away backwards, expecting retaliation.

I grinned as he swam towards me with an evil smirk that I both loved, it looked so fucking sexy, and hated, I was so going to get it this time.

***FT***

I giggled as Edward chased me out of the sea a while later. I fucking giggled.

I didn't giggle. Bella Swan doesn't _giggle_.

And yet, I had found myself doing it frequently throughout the day. I shook my head in disbelief as I pulled my towel out from my bag and began to dry myself, scrubbing the towel over my hair and running it up and down my body.

Edward watched me appreciatively with a smirk before asking, "Can I borrow that? I forgot mine."

I rolled my eyes, but smiled and threw the towel at him, "What happened to well prepared?"

He shrugged, "Preparation flew straight out my mind when I thought the sooner I left my house the sooner I would get to see you."

I ducked my face to hide my smile as I pulled on Edward's shirt again, doing up the buttons that had evaded my eager fingers and left it to hang around my thighs. "Smooth." I muttered making Edward laugh.

I sat myself down, pulling my bag to me intending to take out a sandwich when I looked up to see Edward, water droplets dripping down his perfect body, rolling along his muscular shoulders, down his orgasm worthy pecs and dripping down his abs towards the delectable v of his hips to the hidden package. I licked my lips, no longer hungry for my sandwich. Instead I reached for my camera.

Edward looked up when he heard the click as he was towel drying his hair and grinned. "Wow," he eyed the camera, his eyebrows raised. He looked impressed. "That looks complicated."

I laughed, "This is my baby." I told him. Clicking away at his face, hair stuck up, his smile big, eyes bright.

I zoomed out the lens to get a full body shot of him, running the towel over his chest.

I zoomed in again, catching a picture of the droplets on the v of his hips. The beautiful form of his jaw.

I shot a photo of his eyes, crinkled at the corners in laughter.

He was truly a magnificent model. He was the perfect specimen to take photos of. He could become a masterpiece.

I clicked away, watching him through the lens as he knelt, coming closer and closer until his lips were pressed to the lens of my camera. I moved it out of the way and they were pressed to mine in an instant.

"I didn't know you were into this stuff," he murmured, tucking my hair behind my ear.

I gave a half shrug, "No one does really."

"Why not?" He asked.

I shrugged again. "I don't really know. I guess no one ever asked. Well, that and I suppose there's something quite personal about it."

"I know what you mean," he said, sitting down beside me, his legs sprawled out in front of him, crossed at his ankles, leaning back on his hands. "I've never let anyone listen to my music before."

"Your music?" I questioned, looking up from my camera.

He nodded, "I play the piano."

"Really?" I asked, recalling something he had said earlier about his father not approving of his interest in literature or music.

"Yeah. Esme taught me when I was little and then once I got a hold of the basics and started writing my own stuff I never really let anyone listen. Though I did catch Esme once or twice trying to sneak a peek." His smile told me he wasn't upset about it. He cared for her deeply. "So where'd you get that?" He nodded his head towards the camera in my hands.

"I bought it when I went shopping in Seattle one time." I shrugged

"Oh."

"What?"

"I thought you must have got it for your eighteenth or something."

"Why?" I asked, bewildered.

"I thought they were pretty expensive cameras."

"Oh." Shit. I should have lied. I should have told him Charlie got it for me.

"You've got a job, then?"

My mouth opened and closed soundlessly, my thoughts racing. Should I tell him the truth? Would he hate me? Fuck, he couldn't hate me any more than I hated myself.

"Not…I sort of did…well, not exactly…" Fuck. I lowered my gaze to my camera, not wanting to look at him, not wanted to see the disappointment in his eyes. Shit, forget disappointment, I didn't want to see the disgust.

"Bella?" His voice was soft and gentle, he made me feel so fucking safe again and I knew if I told him I was going to lose that. But I couldn't lie to him. I would never lie to him if I could help it.

I squeezed my eyes shut tight at the thought – maybe he would be better off without me anyway.

I felt his hand cupping my jaw, his thumb rubbing circles into my cheek and I revelled in the feelings it sent running through my body, the non-sexual intimate feelings that I knew I was about to lose.

I pulled away, pulling myself backwards by my hands, sitting myself further away from him. Might as well start getting used to the pain now.

I glanced up briefly to see his eyes, burning with curiosity and worry and beginning to fill with hurt. Fuck. I looked down again.

"What…what do you know about me, Edward? What have other people told you about the police Chief's daughter?"

I could see his confusion out the corner of my eye.

"You told me the some teachers had mentioned my…my reputation?"

He frowned nodding slowly, "I don't care about what they sa-"

I shook my head, "Don't. Just don't say anything you'll regret later."

"Bella, what are you talking about? I don't understand."

"I know you don't." I sighed. "Edward, I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of. The way in which I got this camera would be one of them."

There was a pause. I was about to continue before he asked, "You stole it?"

I shook my head, the disappointment in his tone killing me. If only he knew.

"No Edward, I did something much worse." I placed the camera on the ground before pulling my legs up, my elbows resting on my knees, my hands clutching at my hair. My voice shook when I spoke again. "I was in a really bad place. Not that that's an excuse. But there was shit going on in my life – still is going on, really – that I didn't know how to deal with. It was after all the shit had happened with my mom and sister. I had just moved to Charlie's and I was a fucking mess. I didn't know what to do with myself, or how to cope with everything that had happened and I tried to run away. Got to Seattle before I got fucking stuck and didn't know what to do next." I swallowed thickly, reliving the mess that had been my life – still is my life – in my mind's eyes. I could see it all so fucking clearly.

"I was stood on the corner of this road, late at night, with no where to go when this car pulled up. Mercedes. Some guy wound down the window and asked if I needed a ride." I looked up to see Edward's horrified expression, probably at my complete idiocy. But I was hardly seeing Edward. All I could see was the man, a little younger than Charlie, with empty eyes but a warm attitude. "I know it was a fucking stupid thing to do but I was desperate, I just wanted to get away and forget. I got in the car with him and he took me to this motel. I thought once we got there he was gonna call me a cab or something to take me home but he took me up to his room and…one thing led to another." I felt sick, the bile rising in my throat in memory of what had happened after. "He got out of the bed once we had…" I shivered, "and he pulled his wallet out of his slacks. Gave me a thousand dollars. He said thanks and then told me I could leave." I gave a hollow laugh. "He thought I was a fucking prostitute." I shook my head. That was what had solidified it in my mind. "I took the money, found a different motel and stayed the night, got a cab back to Charlie's the next morning and told him I had stayed at Rosalie's house."

"Bella…" Edward tried but I shook my head. I wasn't fucking finished yet.

"I did again. This time on purpose." I let that fact hang in the air between us.

"Bella…why would you…why?"

"Someone once told me that was all I was good for. Sex. I guess I realised after the first guy mistook me as a prostitute he was probably right. I mean, what the fuck else have I ever been good for?" I wiped my hand over my face, harshly rubbing away the tears that had fallen silently. "No guy at school has ever wanted anything more than a quick fuck, and sometimes more than once just for convenience until they found a nice girl to take home to meet their parents. I'm not a nice person, Edward. I'm fucked up. And…and you're better off without me messing up your life."

Silence. Fucking silence that cut me to the core. I didn't dare look up to see what emotion his eyes held now. I didn't want to know.

"How-" he cleared his throat, "how many?"

"Four." My voice was barely above a whisper.

"When was the last time you…?" he trailed off, but his question was obvious.

"A couple of years ago."

"Why did you stop?"

"Charlie."

"He found out?!"

"No." I said quickly. "No, he never found out. But that's what I was scared of. My mom kicked me out, I was scared if Charlie knew he would kick me out, too. So I stopped." I laughed bitterly. "That and the fact that boys my own age were starting to become interested in sex and I figured why travel so far when I can fuck guys who lived practically right on my doorstep."

My voice was full of loathing and self-hatred. It was hard and cold and it was a voice I hadn't heard myself use since I met Edward. It was a voice I barely recognised but it had slipped back with an ease the unnerved me.

"Why?"

I knew what he was asking. And I didn't want to lie to him. But I wasn't ready to speak about what happened in Florida. Not yet, and especially not to someone who had his foot halfway out the door.

"Because I didn't know how else to be. Because that's my sole purpose in life. It's all I have to offer."

"Bullshit." His harsh tone made me look up at him in surprise, startled out of my bubble of anger and hate and bitterness. His eyes were blazing with anger and something else I couldn't define. "That's fucking bullshit, Bella and you know it." The fury in his voice was barely contained but it was strong and firm.

He took my face almost roughly in his hands, "Tell me, Bella." He shook me a little, "Tell me you know that's not fucking true."

"I…I can't."

"Haven't I already told you this?" He growled. "Haven't we already had this fucking conversation? I told you, Bella, I _told_ you how beautiful and fiery and incredible you are. I told you that you're worth _this_, you're worth _us_. You have so much to offer _us_."

"Well that's all a fucking moot point now anyway, isn't it?" I shoved him away from me angrily, pushing myself to my feet and walking away.

"What are you talking about, where are you going?"

"I'm walking away from this before I have to watch you walk away from me."

I felt his hand wrap around my wrist and pull me back to him harshly. I crashed into his chest and he wrapped his arms around me tight. "No one is fucking walking away from anything." He growled. I tried to push myself away, again, my hands pushing against his chest. "No, Bella," he snarled, one arm wrapped tightly around my waist the other gripping one of my wrists. "Stop pushing me away. I'm still here, aren't I? Look at me. _LOOK_ at me." I rose my eyes to his. "I'm here."

The tears were falling again. "Why?"

"Because I know there's more to this than you're telling me. You may have problems, Bella, everyone does – some more than others – but everybody has baggage and shit that's hard to deal with. And I may not be able to understand some of yours, or why you've done all this shit or how the fuck I'm going to help you but I'm not going anywhere and I'm gonna fucking try so hard to help you and work this shit out together because that's what you do when you fucking care about someone."

I felt myself sag a little, losing the fight. The tears just fell fucking faster.

Edward's voice was softer when he spoke but still as firm as before. "I care about you Bella, and I wanna stop whatever the fuck it is that fills those eyes with so much hurt. I want to make them young again. I want to take it all away. Please," he breathed, "please let me try."

I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged myself to him tightly, burying my face in his chest.

I felt his hands lower to the backs of my thighs so he could lift me. My arms moved and I pushed my face into his neck, burrowing myself further into him, wanting to hide in him, to hide in his arms forever.

It would have been impossible to describe how much he had calmed me. How much I felt at his words, how much they meant to me.

I knew there was only one thing to do. That was to show him.

I had made my decision. I was going to show him what I had brought him here for.

He kissed my temple and I pulled back to press my lips to his.

"Thank you." I whispered.

He shook his head, "Don't thank me. It's not your thanks I need. It's your trust."

I looked deep into his eyes in question.

"I need you to trust me not to leave you."

I closed my eyes with a sigh, pressing my forehead to his as he carried me back to our blanket. He sat down with me straddling his lap. "Noticed that, did you?"

"That you're absolutely terrified of the people you care about abandoning you? Of course I noticed. It hurt you more than you care to admit when your best friend told you she couldn't deal with it anymore. I saw the way you tried to hold yourself together in that nurses room when your father walked away from you and to his wife. I saw the pain in your eyes today when you told me about your sister and your mother kicking you out."

"Am I that much of an open book?" I muttered.

He shook his head, "I'm just completely in tune with you and I have no idea how to switch it off. It's been that way since day one."

I ran my hands through his hair, watching the flickers of the different shades of green in his eyes before murmuring, "I trust you."

"You do?" He arched an eyebrow.

I nodded when a couple of screaming kids running to the sea invaded our bubble. I turned back to Edward. "I'll show you."

I stood, climbing off him and proceeded to shove everything back into my bag. I pushed him by his shoulders, urging him off the blanket before folding it up and handing it to him.

"Where are we going?" He asked, confused as he picked up his bag.

"I'm going to show you what I came here to show you all along."

I smiled at his eager grin as he took my outstretched hand and I lead him along the beach a little ways up to the very edge where some trees began a forest like area. It was far enough along the beach where very few local people rarely ventured and was out of their view.

I walked a little way into the wooded area, Edward following, a little confused, rubbing circles into my hand.

"Uh…you didn't bring me out here to kill me, did you?"

I shot him a grin over my shoulder, "Only if you want me to."

He stopped, startled and I couldn't help crying out with laughter. "Your face! Haha!"

He rolled his eyes before following me again as I had continued on without him. "You're real funny. You know I'm definitely going to-" he stopped next to me, gaping as he stared ahead.

In front of us was a little wooden hut completely surrounding the lower trunk of a tree, the door shut with a padlock. I made my way over to it, pulling out the key I had remembered to grab from my desk draw this morning and unlocked the door.

"Bella?" Edward asked behind me.

I took a deep breath and opened the door, and let him walk inside.

I kept my eyes on his face as he looked around. The ceiling of the roof was painted white and branches of wood covered it like beams. I walked around the double bed, a white gauzy canopy hanging from a branch from the ceiling over the bed and leant against the trunk of the tree – which gave it the effect I had always hoped it would – a little secret hideaway. I dumped my bag in the chair next to the little circular wooden table as Edward gazed around the small, cosy little space that had become my sanctuary.

This was why I was so fucking nervous to show him. This place was mine, nobody else's. This was the place I came to to get away from everything and everyone. This was me to the core. And now I was showing him.

"Bella… this… this is amazing." He looked as though he were in awe of the place. I smiled. "How did you find it?"

"Well, actually I sort of made it."

He looked towards me sharply looking as though he were in awe of me. "You _made_ this place?!"

I nodded, "It was a little project of mine after… well, after I got the money to do it." Edward understood my meaning.

"Bella, this is incredible." He shook his head in disbelief, "I mean this is…fucking amazing!"

I laughed, "Thanks."

He turned his gaze back to me, "You're amazing."

I ducked my head as he moved to me, lifting my chin with his forefinger and thumb before pressing a sweet kiss to my lips.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and deepened the kiss, brushing my tongue along his bottom lip before he opened and let me in. I moaned as he hitched my legs around his waist and carried me to the bed, lifting the canopy over us before climbing on. He did the climbing and I clung to him like a fucking koala bear.

Edward laid me on my back on the pillows and I pushed at his board shorts, willing him to help me take them off, praising the lord that they were all his was wearing.

Once we had both succeeded in the removal of both his shorts and my bikini bottoms he groaned, "Bella, I can't wait any longer, baby, are you ready?"

I nodded bringing him closer to me. I pulled myself upwards using his body for leverage, wrapping my legs around his waist so I was straddling him once more. "Like this," I breathed, rubbing my wet core against his throbbing member.

He lifted me by my hips and lowered me onto him causing us both to moan with pleasure. It had been too fucking long since we had actually had sex and it felt so fucking good.

"Ugghhh, shit, sweetheart, you're tight like this." He growled breathlessly against my neck as he helped me to move above him, lifting his hips to meet mine on every down thrust.

Shivers ran down my spine and a warmth, that had had nothing to do with our activities, spread through my body when he called me that. Nobody had ever called me that before and coming from Edward made me feel cherished.

I felt like nothing could touch us here in my hideaway, nothing could hurt me while I was cocooned here with Edward, protected by the canopy above the bed in our own perfect little bubble.

"I'm not gonna last long," I whimpered against his mouth. We weren't rushed, it was sweet and slow and yet with all these emotions I was hurtling fast towards climax and it seemed as though Edward was as well.

"Me neither," he gasped. He reached a hand between us to rub at my clit making me exhale sharply into his mouth as he inhaled. Our breathing was completely in sync and I had never felt closer to him.

I clutched at his hair as he hit that spot and I whimpered as pleasure crashed over me in waves, my pussy clamping around him, which sent him over the edge.

I wrapped my arms tighter around him and buried my face in his neck, breathing in his scent as we both came down from our high, his hands were running up and down my back, trailing patterns as he panted, his chest rising and falling as rapidly as my own.

"Edward," I breathed, unable to describe what had just happened, unable to put anything, my thoughts, my feelings, into words.

"I know," he whispered. Words weren't needed. We were completely in tune and he knew exactly what I meant. He felt it too.

After a few moments of comfortable silence, he broke it by kissed my slightly sweaty temple and moved us both under the covers. Edward lay on his side and I lay on mine as we faced each other, sharing small caresses and kisses.

"I am in complete awe of you, Bella." He murmured, "I've never met anyone like you, anyone who could ever have created something as beautiful as this." His eyes glanced around the hideaway before coming back to rest on mine.

I gave him a kiss, "I'm not that special. I just enjoy doing this sort of stuff. This was just a kind of childhood fantasy I had."

He arched an eyebrow in question.

"I loved Peter Pan when I was little. I always wanted a little secret den like he had with he lost boys. Somewhere that was completely my own."

"Well, you're very creative," he murmured, "photography, interior design…is this something you want to do after high school?"

"Maybe," I whispered.

Our voices were soft and quiet, hardly daring to rise above a whisper in case we destroyed our peaceful little piece of bliss.

"I want to travel." I smiled, "I would love to travel after high school."

"Instead of college?"

I nodded. "I want to travel…I want to see the world. I want to be free, that would be nice."

"Free of your father?"

"Free of everything. Charlie and the little family he's made for himself. Renee and Victoria. I just want to get enough money to be able to pick up my rucksack and get on a plane and take off and see all there is to see."

"What would you take with you?" Edward murmured with a smile.

"In my suitcase…" I shook my head, "Scratch that, in my rucksack I would take an outfit for warmth and an outfit that would keep me cool and maybe a nice dress – never know where I'll end up and I want to be prepared. I would take my money. And my camera."

"Where would you go first?" He brushed a strand of hair that had fallen over my face behind my ear.

"Paris." Was my immediate answer. He laughed. "I want to eat fresh made croissants on a balcony of a quaint rustic little hotel with a view of the Eiffel tower, and take pictures _from_ the Eiffel tower. I want to drink tea in London and see a show in the West End, see the statue of Peter Pan in Kensington Park. I want to throw a coin into the Trevi fountain in Rome. I want to see all the art in all the museums all over the world and sit in the huge, ancient libraries just to smell all those old books – see the marks people have made on the world. I want to be a part of a flash mob in Manhattan and walk around Central Park."

Edward's eyes were shining as he watched me get carried away with everything I wanted to do and see.

"I want to take pictures of everything I see all over the world and open a gallery for people who don't have the chance to see these things first hand themselves. And I want to make more places like this." I looked around the hideaway with a happy smile on my face.

I realised Edward was staring at me and looked back at him with a blush.

"Sorry," I murmured, "got a little carried away."

He shook his head, running his forefinger down the side of my face and along my jaw. "They're beautiful dreams, Bella."

I smiled, "They're just dreams."

Edward leaned up, resting his head on the hand held up by his elbow, his eyes, though still shining, were a little more serious. "I told you before, you can do anything you put your mind to." He leaned down to press a kiss to my forehead, "You'll get there, sweetheart."

My eyes closed as I drew in a deep slow breath, completely content.

"What are your dreams?"

Edward smiled, "Yours sound pretty good. But I would love to write. I would love to be one of the people you see to have left their mark on the world. I would want to do that with literature and music. I've had very little time for either of them lately but have recently been feeling the urge to pick up a pen and sit at my piano for a while."

"You should," I told him simply.

He smiled and leaned down to press a kiss to my nose, I crinkled it and of course, he laughed. "I think I will."

I pushed him backwards gently so I could lay on his chest, he wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head, holding me tight.

"Thank you." He breathed.

"For what?"

"For inspiring me, sweetheart."

I fell asleep, wrapped in Edward's arms, with a smile on my lips.

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**Awww! Wasn't that nice? Was it what you expected it to be or were you wanting more?**

**Bella's and Edward's outfits can be found on my blog, also a picture of the hideaway and just a random one that inspired Bella's interest in photography.**

**Review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello, I know its been a while. I apologise, I've been busy, but the next chapter is up so I hope you enjoy!**

**Just to let you all know, I have read and appreciate every single one of your reviews but I haven't replied to some as I haven't been on here in a while and am a little confused as to who I have replied to and who I haven't. But I love them all and thank you very very much!**

* * *

Chapter Nine

_Woop, woop  
__That's the sound of da police  
__Woop, woop  
__That's the sound of the beast._

I groaned, wriggling around moving to stretch my arms above my head only to find them restrained.

I frowned in confusion before turning my head to find Edward spooning me, his face smooth in sleep as he held my body close to his. I smiled snuggling impossibly closer, his arms tightened around me unconsciously as I closed my eyes ready to go back to my nap. Then my phone chimed with a message.

I groaned again, this time stirring Edward as I moved to sit up. He shook his head, a crease between his brows as he tried to pull me back to him, making a noise of protest.

"Edward," I chuckled, throatily, my voice still thick with sleep, "I have to get my phone."

"Leave it." He grumbled. He still had yet to open his eyes. I squinted my own by my place in his arms as I looked around the hideaway trying to figure out where my phone was. It had gotten quite dark. I frowned.

My phone chimed again.

"Edward, I've really gotta get that, I need to check the time."

A sound of annoyance rumbled in his chest as he rolled over me, pinning me to the bed. He placed himself between my legs and lay his head down on my chest, his arms wrapped securely round my waist.

"Edward," I laughed.

"Not moving." He muttered into my neck, inhaling and pressing a kiss to the skin he found there. "You smell good."

I ran my fingers through his hair, scratching softly and he hummed in approval, "Feels nice."

"You're oh so coherent when you wake up." I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes.

"Then let's go back to sleep."

I sighed but this time in resignation. Just as I was about to close my eyes my phone chimed again.

Edward growled in frustration, sitting up abruptly and rolling off me to clamber to my bag and grab my phone before crawling back into bed next to me, thrusting the phone at me before pulling me on top of him, our positions reversed.

I chuckled at his antics, taking note that he was not a happy bunny when woken up against his will. But the smile slipped quickly from my face when I saw the time.

"Fuck." I pushed myself from Edward and scrambled for my bikini bottoms and shorts.

"What are you doing?" Edward grumbled, sitting up.

"It's half nine. We've been asleep for five hours."

"Shit." Edward pulled on his board shorts and shirt, grabbed his bag and mine before we rushed out of the hideaway. I quickly padlocked the door before we jogged back to the car.

"Crap, crap, crap." I muttered as I jumped into the passenger seat. "I have seven missed calls, all from Charlie, and ten texts."

"All from your dad?" Edward asked as he pulled out of the lot.

"Mostly. Some are from Seth. Shit." I dialled Seth's number. He picked up on the second ring.

"Bella! Where are you? Are you okay? Charlie's going crazy!"

"I'm fine, Seth. Listen, do you think you can cover for me?"

"What shall I say?" He was talking quietly, probably so not to be heard by Charlie or the step-monster.

"Um…" I bounced my foot as I tried to think quickly for story. "Say…oh! Say I went to Seattle with Rosalie and we got stuck in traffic and our phones died. Say we stopped off at Rosalie's house and I called you from her home phone and that I'll be home soon."

"Okay. I'll see you in a bit."

"Alright. Thanks, Seth."

I let out a breath as I hung up and rested my head back on the head rest, relaxing into the cool leather seat of Edward's car.

"You okay?" Edward glanced over at me as he squeezed my knee.

I placed my hand on top of his, "I'm fine. I'm pro at making up excuses. Years of practice."

Edward smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. "Will you get into trouble?"

I shook my head, "Probably not. Unless Charlie decides to call Rose's parents."

He shot me a frantic look.

"Edward, relax. Charlie wouldn't, he doesn't have a reason to believe I'm lying so he's not gonna check up."

Edward sighed but nodded.

I frowned, "What's wrong?" I took hold of the hand he placed on my knee and squeezed.

"I just don't want you to get into trouble. Your home life sounds pretty shitty as it is I don't want to add to that."

I smiled softly. He was worried about me. My tummy fluttered. "I'll be fine, I promise." I leant over to kiss his cheek and as we reached a red light he turned to press his lips to mine. He pressed his forehead to my own, his eyes full of concern. "Edward, trust me. You wouldn't believe the shit I can get away with. This is nothing in comparison."

He arched an eyebrow, "Like what?"

"Like sneaking out to attend to a house party that the police ended up crashing – Charlie included. I managed to get out of there and back home before he saw me. He's found alcohol in my room before, cigarettes too, and I blagged my way out of it. Hell I even got a tattoo a few years ago and he still has no idea."

Edward eyes popped wide open, "You have a tattoo?!"

I nodded.

"Where? How come I haven't seen it? What is it?"

I laughed, "It's fairly small, on my hip, you were probably too busy ogling my other body parts to notice."

He rolled his eyes, "What is it?"

I blushed, "Nothing," I mumbled.

"You're not gonna tell me?" He gaped.

I shrugged, staring out the window.

"Why not?"

"It's embarrassing and stupid and is one of my many regrets."

"Oh god, you didn't get a tattoo of a penis did you?"

"What?" I shrieked, my head whipping round to face him. "Why the fuck would I, or anyone for that matter, get a tattoo of a penis?"

"I don't know, you could have been drunk!"

I looked at him seriously and asked softly, "Edward. Are you speaking from experience?"

"Ha, ha, you're hilarious."

I laughed, "I know."

"So come one, what is it?"

I groaned, burying my face in my hands.

He laughed, "Didn't think you could distract me that easily, did you?"

When I didn't say anything and we pulled up to the next red traffic light Edward turned to me, "It can't be that bad." He pouted, "Please. Pretty please."

I rolled my eyes with a grin I couldn't hide, "You look ridiculous."

He simply continued to pout. And I gave in. I couldn't help. It was those goddamn eyes.

I sighed heavily, "It's just a small little outline of a dog."

He stared. "A dog?"

I nodded, turning back to staring out the window into nothing.

He chuckled, "Why is that embarrassing?"

"Well it's not so much the tattoo that's embarrassing, it's the idiotic reasoning behind the tattoo."

"Okay, so why did you pick a dog for a tattoo?"

I threw my hands up in the air, "I was young, okay? It wasn't long after I moved here and it was a little while after Charlie started dating Sue and I got drunk, and angry and pissed, and you cannot judge me for my answer." I glared at him threateningly.

He held one of his hands up in surrender, "I wouldn't dream of it."

I sighed, and shrugged, "I always wanted a dog and I was never allowed one." Edward looked at me as if to say "is that it?" but I wasn't finished. "In Florida when I was a kid I had this friend – well, she wasn't really a friend she was my next door neighbour and I was kind of forced to play with her. And she was fucking perfect at everything. And when I say she was perfect at everything I mean she always drew the best pictures and jumped better than me when we played jump rope and swung higher than me on the swings."

Edward nodded seriously, "Understandable, of course."

I glared at his teasing, smothering a smile. "Well, she had the perfect "nuclear" family, you know? Two parents with two point five kids." I rolled my eyes. "She had a mother and a father who were happily married, her and her older brother got along perfectly. And they had a dog. And every evening without fail, just before the sun went down, they would always take this German Shepherd for a walk on the beach, they were always smiling, playing Frisbee, holding hands. And I was so fucking jealous.

"And when Charlie and Sue started dating and she would come round the house with Leah, or I would sit and eavesdrop on Charlie bitching about me being such a problem child to his new girlfriend, telling her all about how my mother kicked me out of the house and my sister wouldn't talk to me," I shook my head, "that perfect family with the dog would just pop into my head. Then one night after I got particularly drunk having listened to Charlie telling his girlfriend in detail just exactly _why_ my mother kicked me out, I handed money to some guy in a tattoo parlour and got what I always wanted." I stared blankly out of the window. "A dog was my key to what I thought was a normal, happy, functioning family."

I didn't even realise the car had stopped until I heard a click. I felt Edward's hand gently turn my head to face him and he pressed a soft, gentle kiss to my lips, this thumb caressing the line of my jaw.

"That's not embarrassing," he murmured after he pulled away. "Your mother should feel fucking ashamed, as should the rest of your family for that matter, but you have nothing to be embarrassed about." He brushed a strand of hair from my eyes as I smiled weakly, but there was a crease between his brows and concern in his eyes telling me that I wasn't convincing enough. "I'll show you something embarrassing…" Then he proceeded to unfasten the tie of his board shorts.

I rolled my eyes with a laugh, "Edward, I know men can be a little insecure about their size but trust me when I tell you that you have nothing to worry about."

Edward glanced up at me, halting his movements for a second, "Well if that didn't boost my ego I dunno what will. But I'm not talking about my dick, get your mind out of the gutter, Swan."

I frowned, watching his as he shuffled out of his shorts. "What the hell are you doing, then?"

"Showing you what a real embarrassing tattoo looks like."

My eyes popped, much like the way Edward's had when I told him I had a tattoo. "Oh my god. I was kidding when I asked if you were talking from experience. Do not tell me you actually have a tattoo of a penis."

"Of course not. Look."

He turned to face his door and pulled down his shorts. And there, on his ass cheek, was his tattoo.

I cleared my throat to keep my laugh at bay, "That's erm…that's real manly." I could help it, a giggle burst from my lips before I could stop it.

It was a swan. A very pretty, Celtic looking swan. On his ass.

"I was drunk."

"I'll say."

He pulled his shorts back up and spun back round with tickling fingers. I shrieked. "Stop! Stop, I'm sorry!" I wriggled and writhed and ended up throwing myself onto his lap, straddling his legs, his hands around my waist. "So?"

"So what?"

"So I wanna hear the story."

His smile was huge as he gazed at me, brushing my hair from my face again. "You're beautiful like this."

I rolled my eyes, a blush covering my cheeks.

Edward shook his head, "You really have no idea. It's true Bella, you're fucking beautiful, you always are, but you look…" he frowned, searching for words, "you look indescribable, flawless. You look blissfully beautiful when you're like _this_."

"Like what?" I asked quietly.

"Mussed hair, no make-up, just a shirt and shorts. You look like you. Nothing is tainting you, you're just pure Bella and pure Bella is beauty beyond words."

My heart pounded and I felt as though it were in my throat. I swallowed thickly and blinked rapidly pressing my mouth furiously to his. My hands tugged fistfuls of his soft hair and I held him tightly to me, never wanting to let go. He made me want to cry and laugh and scream and sob all at once. When he said shit like that it made me feel as though I could feel every single emotion I had ever felt in my entire life all in one go and it felt fucking fantastic.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, burrowing my face into his warm throat as he held my body close to his, fiddling with the tips of my hair and pressing kisses to my shoulder.

"I wanna hear the story," I whispered after a while as I stroked my fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck.

He chuckled and I felt it rumble through my own chest as it was pressed flush to his. "Well, as I said before, I was drunk. I had just broken up with a girlfriend after I realised I felt nothing for her. Absolutely nothing. Alice and her boyfriend Jasper convinced me to go out with them and they spent the night trying to hook me up with girls at all these different bars. After a few too many shots I started to get pretty pissed and ended up ranting and raving non-stop the rest for the night about how everything would just be so much easier if humans were like swans – who mate for life. Then after a few hours or so of me constantly repeating this to them as they unsuccessfully tried to hook me up, they convinced me to get a tattoo of a swan, I quote, "if you love swans so fucking much"." I laughed and Edward continued. "All of us, as drunk as we were, thought this was an amazing idea. In conclusion, I woke the next morning with a very sore ass."

I laughed and looked up at him, "You know, that's kinda cute."

"I'm glad you think so. Alice told me it was completely idiotic until I reminded her it was her idea. She shut up pretty quickly after that." He grinned.

I laughed as I shifted a little, which made Edward groan. I grinned wickedly as he eyed me warningly his eyebrow arched. "Don't start something you can't finish, Bella."

"What if I want to finish it?" I rocked my hips rubbing my clothed core against his covered but awakening erection.

"Bella, we can't baby," his voice was strained.

"Why not?" I mumbled as I kissed his neck. "I told you I wanted to have sex in your car." I unbuttoned my shorts with one hand while the other ran up and down his chest.

"Fuck. Baby, I really don't want you to get in trouble with Charlie."

I stopped my ministrations on his neck and looked at him sharply. "Edward. I need you. Tomorrow is Sunday and we aren't going to see each other until Monday. That's a very long time we have to wait until we can…do stuff. And I need you now." I took his hand and guided it into my shorts and under my bikini bottoms pressing his fingers to my core. "I need you, Edward, feel how wet I am for you. I'm aching for you."

"Shit. What are you doing to me, Bella?"

I gasped as he flicked his fingers and whimpered as I rocked against his hand. I took my hand from his, trusting him completely to touch me like I needed him to, and palmed his hard on through his shorts as my other hand clutched at his hair and pulled his mouth to mine.

Edward bucked his hips into my hand and I pulled him out of his shorts, and wrapped my hand around his cock. He hissed and groaned as I touched his bare skin and began to stroke.

"More, I need more." I panted into his mouth. His hand left my pussy and I whimpered in frustration. He soothed me with a kiss, pushing his tongue into my mouth making me moan as he pushed my shorts and bikini bottoms down and I yanked at his board shorts until they were around his knees.

He took hold of my hips and helped lower me onto him.

"Uhh," I gasped, wrapping my arms around his neck and panting into his shoulder.

Edward groaned out a "Fuck," and pressed a rough kiss to my temple as he held my hips still and thrust up.

"Oh my fuck!" I cried out as he continuously hit the spot that only he could making me grip his shirt tightly, groaning into his neck, "Don't fucking stop."

"Shit, baby, you're so tight like this," he gasped.

"I'm not gonna last very long," I moaned breathlessly.

"Me neither. Fuck, Bella, you feel so good."

"Edward, Christ, Edward, Edward!" My voice got higher and higher and all I could fucking think and speak was his name as I headed fast towards climax, Edward following.

"Fuck!" He shouted out as he released a second after me and I collapsed against him, his chest rising and falling rapidly against my own and I gasped for breath.

I hummed against his throat as I placed kisses along his neck, up towards his jaw to his chin, finding his lips with my own. "Thank you," I breathed.

Edward chuckled tiredly, shaking his head, "Thank _you_."

He kissed me before I moved back to my own seat and pulled up my shorts and he did the same. I grabbed my phone and sighed, hoping that Charlie would buy my excuse and just leave me alone tonight. I was in too good a mood to have it ruined by him and his fucking family.

"I have to go," I mumbled reluctantly. Edward nodded leaning across to run his fingers soothingly through my hair, kissing me sweetly.

"Text me as soon as you can, okay?"

I nodded, grabbing my bag, sharing one last kiss before waving goodbye and walking down the road and around the corner to where hell awaited me.

***FT***

"Where have you been, Bella?" Charlie asked. He met me as I walked through the front door and I knew this was going to be bad.

"I called Seth." I said, "Didn't he tell you? I went to Seattle with Rose and-"

"Don't lie to me Bella. Rosalie called here this morning looking for you. Sue told me." Shit. "And getting Seth to lie for you! Bella, what the hell were you thinking? Do you have any idea how angry Sue is?"

"I can guess." I muttered.

"Don't get smart with me, Bella, because you're skating on very thin ice as it is." His voice was shaking with anger but he wasn't shouting. Not yet, anyway. "Where were you, Bella?"

"Seattle."

"Don't lie-"

"I'm not. Just because I wasn't with Rose doesn't mean I wasn't it Seattle." I snapped.

Charlie took a deep breath as though to calm himself. "Well, if you weren't with Rose, who were you with?"

"Does it matter?"

"Yes, Bella, it matters."

"Why?"

He lost his temper. "Because I want to know the sort of people my daughter is hanging around with when she feels the need to lie about them."

I didn't say anything. I folded my arms and leant against the banister, looking at my feet. I was angry with myself. Not only because the lie had backfired but I'd also got Seth into trouble.

I heard a shuffle of shoes and a quiet murmur and when I looked up, Sue was next to Charlie, whispering something into his ear. He frowned but sighed in resignation.

"Bella," he said, "I'm going to ask you one more time who you were with."

I shrugged my shoulders my lips staying firmly shut.

"Give me your bag, young lady."

I stared at Sue.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard." She said. "Give me your bag."

"Why the fuck would I do that?"

"Do NOT talk to my wife like that, Bella." Charlie shouted making me jump. "Sue is your step-mother and is my _wife_ and you will treat her with respect. Now hand her your bag."

My chest ached and I swallowed against the lump in my throat, blinking back the bitter tears of betrayal I felt as I grudgingly handed my bag to Sue.

I watched as the first thing she pulled out was my box of uneaten sandwiches.

"How incriminating." I spat.

Sue glared at me, as did Charlie.

Then she pulled out my camera.

"What is this?" She asked.

"What does it look like?" I muttered, but my heart dropped to my stomach. All she had to do was switch it on and she would see pictures of Edward and me.

"Where did you get it?" Charlie asked, his voice low and dangerous.

"I bought it." I shrugged.

"With what money, Bella?" His eyes were accusing and it fucking hurt.

"With my money."

"You don't have any money, Bella, you don't work." Sue said, scathingly.

"Can you just fucking stay out of this, for once in your life?" My voice rose.

"DON'T TALK TO MY WIFE LIKE THAT. Now, where did you get this?" Charlie took my camera from Sue and shook it in front of me.

"I bought it in Seattle ages ago."

"Don't fucking lie to me." Charlie was fuming now, I had never seen him so angry and it scared me. "Did you get this today? Did you steal it? Did your friends convince you to do this, the ones you were with today? Are these the sort of people you hang around with?"

"I didn't steal it!" I gasped.

"Well you must have!" Charlie shouted. "How else could you have got it? You don't have money, Bella, so you're either doing something you shouldn't be to get the money or you stole it."

I didn't say anything. He had hit very close to the truth and I was fucking terrified. My hands trembled and I clenched them into tight fists as I bit the inside of my cheek trying to stop the tears.

"Are you doing drugs?"

"What? No of course no-"

"Are you dealing drugs? Is that what your friends do?"

"No! I-"

"So you stole it." Charlie yelled. I shook my head but he wouldn't let me talk as I choked back sobs that threatened to engulf me. "Then where did you get this? _This_," he shook the camera in front of me again, "that makes you think you have the right to fucking _steal_. Or deal fucking DRUGS. WHERE DID YOU GET THIS, BELLA?"

I brushed the tears furiously from my cheek as I tried to reach for it.

Sue took it from Charlie instead. "No," she spat at me, shouting. "You are not to have this, I don't even want this in my house."

She moved to the front door and opened it, and with a sickening feeling I knew what she was going to do before she did it.

"No, please don't!"

But I couldn't even move to stop her. I watched, frozen, as she threw it out the door and my camera smashed down onto the concrete of the driveway.

I gasped, my hand covering my mouth in horror as the tears streamed uncontrollably from my eyes. I felt myself sinking to the floor, feeling sick to my stomach. With a single action, Sue had managed to make _everything_ pointless. The money I had earned, their hands all over me, pinching my breasts, down my pants, all over my ass, my body, my hair, the smell of their breath, their tongues down my throat, all of it was pointless. I had done it for nothing. And that made sick.

With the slam of the front door a sob of complete and utter despair escaped me and I stumbled desperately to my feet and up the stairs, crashing the bathroom door closed before I was sick.

Every time I managed to calm myself down I would feel their hands on me and it would start all over again. The worst part was when it all reminded me of _him_. When that happened I felt like my throat completely closed up and I had to fight to breathe.

I don't know how long I sat on the bathroom floor but when I stood up I realised it was almost pitch black as I hadn't turned on the light when I had rushed in here. I pulled the switch and winced in the brightness before brushing my teeth and washing my hands at the sink. I frowned at my reflection no longer feeling as though I were as beautiful as Edward had told me. I felt dirty and disgusting. A single tear fell and I brushed it away angrily before tearing all my clothes off and stepping into the shower, letting the water run scalding hot as I scrubbed my body all over. Edward was wrong. Pure Bella didn't exist. Even without make-up and fancy clothes and with mussed hair, I was still tainted. And it would never fucking go away.

I wrapped a towel securely around myself and picked up my clothes from the floor before hurrying to my room. I pulled on my sleep shorts, some woolly socks and a large, oversized sweater before climbing into bed, pulling the duvet over my head.

I slept fitfully, seeing _him_ every way I turned and I woke up in the middle of the night to find myself screaming. I slept with the light on after that.

It really fucking hurt to know that if I could hear Sue moaning and groaning every night then both she and Charlie would have heard me screaming, and yet I cried myself to sleep, huddled with my back against the wall, my eyes fixed securely on the door, praying he wouldn't visit me in my dreams again.

***FT***

I woke late the next day to find my broken camera sitting on my desk and five missed texts from Edward.

Fuck. I had forgotten to text him last night.

I sighed as I dragged myself out of bed and downstairs, dreading what would be awaiting me. But Charlie and Sue were nowhere to be seen, neither was Leah. The only person I found was Seth, sat at the kitchen table doing his homework.

He looked up as I entered the kitchen and eyed my attire with a smile.

"Bite me." He read off my sweater. I nodded and he chuckled, but then his eyes turned sad. "I'm sorry." He said with a frown.

I looked up from where I had been swirling my cereal around my bowl with a frown of my own, "For what?"

"For getting you in trouble last night."

I stared before shaking my head, "Seth, I got me into trouble last night, you had nothing to do with it. If anything I was the one to get _you_ into trouble. Did your mom freak?"

He shook his head, "She's convinced that you brainwashed me into somehow," he rolled his eyes. "Either that or I didn't know that you were lying and thought you really were with Rose. I think Charlie knows the truth though, but he didn't say anything."

I nodded. "Where are they?"

Seth shrugged, "Dunno, shopping or something, gone out for the day. Leah's at her "friend's". Charlie left a note for you one the fridge."

I stood and stumbled my way to the fridge in my woolly socks.

_Bella, I've gone out with Sue. You are grounded and are not to leave the house. Make dinner for you and Seth – we won't be back until late – and stay out of trouble._

I sighed and sat back down to continue stirring my cereal around my bowl.

"I don't think you stole it."

I looked up to see Seth watching me carefully.

"I don't think you deal drugs either, that's not your style."

I snorted though was oddly comforted. "Thanks, Seth." I mumbled.

"I put it on your desk. I snuck out to get it this morning before Mom and Charlie woke up. I don't think you'll be able to use it again but if you had a memory card in there there's a chance you may still have all your photos." He said this all so simply, like it was no big deal. Right now it meant the fucking world to me.

I got up and put my bowl in the sink before moving around behind Seth and wrapping my arms around him, kissing his cheek. "Thank you," I murmured, hugging him tight.

He patted my hand, "That's okay. Don't let the 'rents get you down." I rolled my eyes and he grinned. "Seriously though, I know they think you're just rebelling because you're an attention seeking teenager – well mom does at any rate – but I just think you're sad." He seemed thoughtful, as though he wasn't even talking to me anymore. "I think you just need someone to listen to you." Then he went back to his homework as though he hadn't said anything. I gave him another hug before heading upstairs to spend the day doing my own homework.

I didn't bother getting dressed. I lounged on my bed writing essays when my phone chimed.

"Crap," I mumbled when I saw it was another text from Edward. Not only had I forgotten to text him last night I also forgot to reply the half a dozen he had sent me since then.

_Bella, please just let me know if you're ok. X _

I sent him a quick reply. _Sorry. Forgot to text you last night x _

_Baby you ok? x_

I sighed, my chest aching as it had been since my camera smashed. I glanced at it, sitting all broken and mangled on my desk and felt like if someone cut open my chest right now, that's what my fucking heart would look like.

I wished more than anything Edward was with me right now.

_Yeah. I just miss you x_

He replied in under ten seconds.

_What did those fucking bastards do, baby? x_

Christ, was I really that transparent? I asked him so.

_No, I just know you that well. Tell me what happened, sweetheart x_

The term of endearment made me want to break down and I thought maybe Seth was right, maybe I just needed to talk to someone. So I called Edward and I told him everything, leaving out the part about _him_, I wasn't ready for that yet.

"Shit Bella, I'm so sorry, baby." I could almost see him running his hands through his hair.

I shook my head, "It's not your fault."

I could hear him sigh on the other end of the phone. "Please don't cry." Until he said it I didn't even realise that I was. "I can't stand hearing you like this when I can't even hold you."

Fuck I wanted him to hold me, I wanted it more than anything. I was falling into this thing with Edward way too fucking fast and there was nothing I could grab onto to slow me down or stop it.

"I wish you were here," I mumbled, wiping the tears from my cheek.

He muttered something that I couldn't hear before he murmured, "Me too, baby, so much."

He skilfully moved onto lighter topics and even had me fucking laughing, something I felt like I would never do again every time I looked at my camera. He told me more stories about Alice and Jasper and I often found myself clutching the stich in my side and gasping for breath as he told me of their antics and the pranks he and Alice used to pull on each other when they were kids.

What felt only a little while later when in actuality we had been on the phone for the majority of the day – I had definitely gone over my allowed minutes – I told Edward that I had to go. I needed to make dinner and who knew when Charlie and Sue would be back. So, we reluctantly hung up the phone and I made Seth and I lasagne.

We spent the evening in front of the television, watching movies and eating popcorn before Charlie and Sue got home. I excused myself and headed for my room, not wanting to spend the rest of the night with them in the slightest.

Instead I managed to extract my memory card from my destroyed camera and plugged it into my laptop. Seth was right, my photos had all been saved. I smiled at the ones of Edward as he came closer and closer towards the camera until I had a picture of his lips pressing a kiss to the lense. It made me laugh. There were a couple of pictures of us together and the one I loved was of the pair of us. I was straddling Edward's lap as we sat on the beach. I was wearing his blue shirt, one of my arms around his neck, my hand stroking through the hair at the nape of his neck, he was shirtless and was holding me close, our foreheads pressed together as his hand closest to the camera curled around my neck with his thumb stroking my jaw. There were smiles on our faces, big, shit-eating grins.

I began editing, messing around with colours, not really planning on changing anything. Then I stopped, realising I had just created the perfect picture. I had set the whole photo as black and white but left his emerald green eyes colourful and the blue of his shirt I was wearing.

It was perfect.

I climbed into bed shortly after and received a text.

_Sleep well, beautiful x_

I fell asleep that night, tear free and dreamed of Edward.

* * *

**Had to have a little drama in there, can't be rainbows and flowers all the time sadly. **

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**Bella's clothes, tattoo and Edward's tattoo can be found on my blogger - the address on my profile.**

**Review :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hiya, back sooner than before :) Some more drama for you...**

* * *

Chapter 10

A month. I had been grounded for a month because I refused to tell Charlie and Sue who I had spent that Saturday with and lied about being with Rosalie. I was grounded for so long, by the time I became a free person again the bruise Jacob had painted on my face had faded completely and Seth was pretty recovered himself.

I spent an entire month helping Sue with household chores, spending my weekends stuck in my bedroom with nothing to do but read and listen to music – the one thing that kept me going was Edward. He would text me constantly and call me late at night after everyone else in the house was asleep. His voice was what helped me survive that very long month. And, of course, my lunch times at school were the highlight of my life.

Recently, however, we had been having a few close calls that left us tense and on edge and it fucking killed me but it was putting a strain on our relationship, especially after Mr Greene nearly caught us red fucking handed. I had to hide behind the classroom door, half dressed, as he and Edward had a lovely little chat – all the while I was praying to god he wouldn't notice my bra sticking out under the corner of Edward's desk.

Edward rushed to close the door for Mr Greene as he left the classroom and we heaved big fucking sighs of relief when he strutted off down the corridor and out of sight.

"That was way too fucking close," I placed my hand over my pounding heart as I rushed to retrieve my bra. "He was practically standing on this at one point."

Edward ran his hand through his hair and slumped into his chair, shaking his head, his eyes squeezed shut. He pinched the bridge of his nose and I knew that was a bad sign. "If we carry on like this I'm going to have a heart attack."

I tried to lighten the mood as I plopped myself onto his desk in front of him, "Don't worry, you're not _that_ old."

He didn't laugh and seemed to be in a shitty mood the rest of the day pressing a chaste kiss to my cheek before sending me on my way. Our phone call that night was short and he told me he was on cafeteria duty the next day so we couldn't spend lunch together, hence _my_ shitty mood the next day.

I was well intent on buying my lunch quickly then spending the rest of the hour behind the gym, smoking, alone. That didn't plan out very well.

"Hey, Bella boo, haven't seen you in ages."

"Don't call me that, Riley," I shuddered as I paid for my BLT and headed for the exit. Suddenly, his hand was wrapped around my upper arm, halting my movements.

"Where d'you think you're going?" He asked with a grin. "You haven't spent lunch with us since I don't know when, you're coming to sit with us." And he proceeded to drag me over to an empty table.

"Yeah, uh, if you hadn't noticed, Riley, Rosalie and I aren't exactly on speaking terms right now." But he completely ignored me, pulling out a chair and guiding me to sit down with his hands on my shoulders. At first I was glad to see it was a table pretty close to the doors – I could make a quick escape if Rosalie turned up – but then I noticed that Edward was stood about a meter away from the table, leaning against the wall with his arms folded.

We both quickly glanced away from each other when our eyes met.

Well this was going to be fucking awkward.

"Riley, come on," I said, "do I really have to sit here?"

"Yes." His tone was firm and left no room for argument. I sighed as I unwrapped my sandwich. "So, who's "E"?"

I stared at him. How the fuck had he remembered that?

"What?" I asked, stalling.

"You know, the guy who sent you the note."

I saw Edward tense out of the corner of my eye. Fuck. "He's no one, Riley."

"You sure about that?"

"Yes. Can you just drop it?"

"Do I know him?"

"No, leave it alone."

Riley chewed on his pasta, staring at me with a frown. "You're an awful liar, Bells."

"Bullshit," I scoffed, "I have a cop for a dad, remember?"

"Aah, so you _are_ lying!"

I sighed heavily, "Riley, if this is the only topic of conversation you are interested in then I'm gonna leave."

He put his hands up in surrender, "Alright, touchy subject, I get it." He paused and I was fucking grateful until he spoke again. "So what's happening with you and Rose, how come you don't talk anymore?"

I groaned and took an angry bite of my sandwich.

Riley looked around as though checking for eavesdroppers before whispering, "Did she find out you took her boyfriend's v card?"

I coughed, choking on some tomato and reached for my bottle of water. Edward stood fucking frozen, his eyes fixed on us. Shit, shit, shit. I had to let him know somehow that this definitely did not happen recently.

"Riley, that was years ago, okay? It happened one fucking time and it was before they were even dating. And I swear to fucking god if you say one word to Rose I will chop your balls off."

Riley didn't look at all bothered by my threat, in fact he grinned, "There you are, Swan. Haven't seen you for a while. There's been this moping, miserable girl who took your place."

I stared. "What the fuck are you talking about, Ri?"

"Bella, the last time I saw you out having fun was the party the day we came back to school, ever since then nobody's seen you. You don't come to parties anymore, hell you don't even sit with us at lunch you always sneak off somewhere." I was shaking my head but Riley ignored me. "Whenever I do see you you're in a bad mood and all miserable."

"I'm not." I snapped, "I just don't have time for petty arguments they're a waste of my time."

"Your friends are a waste of your time, you mean." It wasn't a question.

I didn't know what to say. I was just wrapped up in Edward at the moment, he was the only good thing in my life right now. He made me laugh and all my friends seemed to do at the moment was piss me off or make me feel shitty about myself. But I couldn't tell Riley this, so I gave him the first excuse I could think of. "I was grounded."

He rolled his eyes telling me that he didn't accept that as an excuse but he went with the change of topic. "What for?"

"I went out, lost track of time, fed Charlie some lie about being with Rose and our phones died and he found out I was lying."

Riley laughed, "Yeah, you can lie my ass."

I hit his arm, "I fucking can and you know it. I would have gotten away with it if Rosalie hadn't called at the house for me earlier that morning."

He arched an eyebrow, "So she's trying to make amends?"

I shrugged, picking at the sandwich that I was no longer hungry for.

"I don't understand girls at all." He shook his head as though trying to shake his confusion. "They're so fucking bitchy and pathetic, all best friends one minute then bitching about each other behind their backs the next. Men are simple. You don't like someone, you punch 'em. End of."

I glared at him, "I'm not bitchy and I'm not fucking pathetic. You have no idea what went on so you can shut the fuck up." Riley simply rolled his eyes then chuckled when I added, "Rose got a fucking tennis ball to the head that told her I was pissed at her so don't go telling me I'm that fucking complex."

"Look, why don't you come to homecoming with me? We'll dance the fucking Cha-Cha-Cha, drink, I'll show you a good time then when you and Rose are both good and drunk you can hug and make up. Sound good?"

I frowned. He was doing it again. Why was Riley asking me out? We were friends. And Edward was standing right fucking there! Not that Riley was aware of that at all, nor should he care. "I don't think I'm going to homecoming."

"Why not?"

"…Grounded?"

"Bullshit. I'm taking you to homecoming, and that's the last I want to hear about it." He looked pretty pleased with himself when Emmett and Rose came and sat down and he informed them of his plan.

"I'm not going, Ri, and that's the last I want to hear about it."

The smug smirk was wiped from his face as I stood to make my exit. I heard Rosalie call my name but I didn't turn back. I just kept on walking.

***FT***

"So Riley asked you to homecoming?"

I stopped editing a photo of Edward on my laptop and focussed my full attention on his voice.

"Yeah." If he had heard that at lunch then he should have heard my response to it.

There was silence on the other end of the phone.

"Edward?"

"Yeah?"

"Just checking you're still there."

"Mmhmm."

Silence.

I didn't like this silence. It made me feel fucking hollow and empty.

"So-"

"I think-"

We both spoke at the same time.

"You go." I told him.

"I think you should go."

"Okay…I was just going to ask if you were busy this-"

"No, Bella, I meant I think you should go with Riley. To homecoming."

I frowned. "What?" He didn't say anything. "What do you mean? You _want_ me to go with Riley?"

"No I don't want you to go with Riley, don't be ridiculous."

I was really fucking confused. "Well, you're gonna have to explain, Edward, because I really don't understand what is it you're saying."

"I just…" He sighed and I could picture him pinching the bridge of his nose, a crease between his brows, hips lips turned down in a frown, such a contrast to the happy Edward, eyes sparkling at me, laughing on the screen of my laptop. "Maybe it will be good. You know, maybe it's a good idea to have people see you with someone."

"Why?"

"So they won't suspect anything."

I shook my head in confusion, "Edward, I'm really struggling here," my voice was harsher than I meant it to be, probably in response to his own distanced voice. "You're going to have to help me out a little bit more. Who suspects us?"

"No one."

"Then what's the problem?"

"Well we can't keep sneaking off every lunch time to have sex in my classroom – no scratch that, because its hardly sneaking, we're doing it right under everyone's nose and at some point, one of us is going to slip up or someone will walk in a second sooner and it will be out in the open for the world to see."

I understood what he was saying. I did. So I didn't understand why it hurt so fucking much. I knew that we didn't want anyone to find out about us, I knew we would both get into trouble, he could lose his job and though it technically wasn't illegal, Charlie would have fun trying to pin something on Edward. I knew all of this, yet it fucking killed me because it felt like he was ashamed.

_Was_ he ashamed?

Was he ashamed of _me_?

The question was on my lips but I held back, I pulled the words back in fear of sounding fucking pathetic, because it sounded pathetic to me.

"Listen, I've gotta go, I'll see you later."

"Ok-" The endless monotone ring told me he hand hung up before I could even finish. "Bye then." I murmured.

I sighed placing my phone down beside the open laptop on my desk and stared. I didn't understand. I couldn't even express my confusion because I was that fucking bewildered.

Why was Edward off with me? I was sure I hadn't done anything to upset him. Maybe the whole Emmett thing pissed him off. I was going to kill Riley. But I couldn't even yell at him for it because he had no idea about Edward and I and screaming at him would surely raise his suspicions and that's what Edward was worried about.

"Bella, come and do the dishes please." Charlie called up the stairs.

I rolled my eyes and forcibly pushed myself towards my bedroom door as I could slowly feel myself already beginning to lose the will to live. Cleaning dishes under Sue's critical eye while listening to Charlie ramble on about how this is teaching me respect or some shit like that, on top of the crappy phone conversation with Edward, was definitely not what I need right now.

"The pan isn't clean, you need to wash it again."

I wanted to take the frying pan and smash it around the side of Sue's head, but I bit my tongue from saying anything and tightened my hand around the handle of the pan, playing out mine and Edward's date in my head to calm me. We hadn't been on one since as I was grounded but I was hoping we could go this Saturday. Or rather, I _had_ been, but homecoming was this Saturday and he would probably want me to go to that instead – keep up appearences and all that. I frowned. Or maybe it was an excuse. Maybe he would rather spend the night chaperoning a bunch of high school students and watch me "date" some guy, than spend the time with me.

Maybe the Emmett thing had pushed him over the edge. Maybe he really wasn't okay with everything that I had told him and Emmett – my own best friend's boyfriend – had been the final straw.

I can't say I blamed him. I probably would have felt the same being in his position. Who would want to date someone like me? I fucking deserved what I got. I was such a fucking hypocrite, crying and holding my own self fucking pity party because of _him _when I went around fucking men for fucking money like some whore. I fucking deserved everything I got and no amount of whining and bitching and complaining was going to change the truth of the matter.

"BELLA!"

I jumped, spinning round, soap bubbles all up my arms, a sponge in one hand and a dripping frying pan in the other. "What?" I gasped.

Seth was staring at me strangely, looking me up and down as though he had never seen me before, before he asked, "Are you okay?"

I frowned, "Huh?" I sounded breathless.

"You've been scrubbing that pan like you were trying to scrub straight through it and I've called your name at least six times."

"Oh, sorry." I turned and rinsed the pan under the tap, noting the Sue and Charlie were no longer in the room.

"Bella?" Seth placed a hand on my shoulder and squeezed as I rinsed my own hands and dried them. "Are you alright?"

I turned my head, giving him a weak smile. "Yeah. I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

Seth shrugged, "You been a little out of it these past few days."

I shook his hand off my shoulder and made to leave, "I'm fine, Seth. Thanks."

I had one foot out the door when he spoke again. "Bella?"

"Yeah, Seth?" He was looking at me strangely again.

"You know you can talk to me, right? If you ever need to." He looked so much older than what he was when he said that.

I forced a smile again for his benefit but said more sincerely, "I know, Seth. Thank you." Before I bolted to my bedroom.

I locked the door behind me and sat myself down, moving my cell off my laptop onto the desk beside it and opened the computer, signing into the Facebook account I rarely used.

If Edward wanted me to go to homecoming and be seen by everyone with another guy, then I was going to give him what he wanted. And if it was on Facebook then the world would know about it in a matter of minutes.

I searched for Riley and wrote on his wall.

_I've been thinking about what you said and I've changed my mind. Pick me up at eight. We'll have fun at homecoming x x x_

***FT***

The rest of the week passed by slowly. I saw very little of Edward and spent every lunchtime with my friends. Or rather, I spent every lunchtime with Riley while Rose and Emmett occupied the same table. Rose tried to talk to me and I didn't protest…too much. But I only spoke to her when she asked me direct questions and she received very minimal answers. I could see Emmett glaring at me from across the table when Rose looked all put out and heartbroken by my terse responses but I didn't give a shit. He could suck my dick.

My plan worked. After my little Facebook post the entire student body was talking about it the next day and I received a text from Edward on one of his free periods letting me know that he had heard as well.

_You're going to homecoming with Biers. Every student in the school is talking about it. x_

I replied quickly. _I'm doing what you wanted x _

And I got a fucking detention for having my phone out in lesson. But I didn't care. I was doing this for Edward. For _us_. I was doing something to make this relationship work and though I felt both a strange of combination of nerves and excitement to even think the word, I sat through my entire detention with a smile on my face.

***FT***

I pulled on my nude slash pale pink platform heels and stood in front of the mirror tugging a little on my dress. The upper half was pale pink, fitted and matched the colour of my shoes; thin straps held it up and the rest of the floating skirt was navy, with an intricate pattern of sequined diamantes around the empire line. I'd painted my nails to match the skirt. I kept my make-up soft and subtle and my hair in natural waves. Edward liked me natural.

The doorbell rang and I heard Leah squealing downstairs. I rolled my eyes and made my way carefully down the steps in my heels, just in time to see Charlie opening the door for Felix.

I gaped as he stood there looking all cocky, he raised his eyebrows when he saw me and licked his lips with a grin. I felt fucking sick. Sue and Leah came out of the living room, all smiles, Leah wearing the long purple bridesmaid dress from Charlie and Sue's wedding.

"Mr Swan, Mrs Swan, it's a pleasure to meet you." Felix said politely. Dipshit.

Charlie scowled, "That's Chief Swan to you."

I grinned. Go Charlie. He had a knack for picking out the douche bags. It was his job.

Sue slapped at Charlie's arm before holding out a hand for Felix who kissed the back of it. Sue gushed. "Oh, what a polite young man, you can call me Sue. You take care of my daughter, now."

"I'll look out for both of them," Felix nodded his head in my direction, "don't worry about that."

Charlie moved and blocked me from Felix's view when suddenly Riley appeared next to him at the door.

"Hi, sir, how you doing?" Riley asked.

"I'm good thanks, Riley," Charlie said, pulling Riley inside while shaking his hand before putting an arm around him and clapping him on the shoulder, "and enough of that sir, crap, you make me feel old. How many times do I have you tell you call me Charlie?"

Riley laughed, "Sorry about that, Chazz."

"Don't push your luck," Charlie said in mock seriousness before laughing.

Felix looked like he would punch Riley if he could. It was fucking hilarious.

"No need for you to look out for my Bella, boy," Charlie said to Felix with a barely masked glare, "Riley's got it all under control, isn't that right?"

"That's right, Chief," Riley said with a grin, slinging his own arm around Charlie's shoulders.

"Come on, Felix, let's go," Leah squealed, grabbing his hand and pulling him away from the door.

"Mm." Felix grunted and followed her out.

Sue closed the door behind them and turned angrily to Charlie. "Why couldn't you be nice to him? You're nice to Bella's _date_." Sue sneered the word.

"I don't know that kid but I didn't like him one bit. Riley here I've known since he was a toddler. Went to school with his father."

"Yeah, Charlie, why'd you have to be so mean? You had him running off with his tail between his legs." Riley grinned.

I rolled my eyes as him and my father bantered back and forth for a while before I'd had enough. "Can we please go now?"

"Sure," Riley laughed, taking my hand. His was too warm and didn't feel right. "See ya later, Chief."

"You look after my girl, now." Charlie said.

"You know I will."

And we finally left the house.

"You look nice," Riley said as he drove us to school.

"Thanks," I said, looking out the window.

That was all that was said the rest of the drive.

As we pulled into the parking lot I glanced over to the staff parking lot and noticed the sleek, black Vanquish parked right near the exit. Edward was here.

Homecoming was pretty shitty at Forks High School. As was prom and every other dance. They were all held in the gym with Mr Banner as the DJ and streamers and balloons for decorations like we were five year olds. But the girls fucking loved it, squealing and shrieking about what to wear and who was going with whom. The way I saw it, it was a waste of my time unless someone spiked the punch. But I wasn't here to enjoy it at any rate. I was here to put on a show. Edward would see. He would see through what everyone else was seeing. I was doing this for us, for him, I had to. I had to make him see that I was serious about us. I wasn't some fucking school girl who had a pathetic little crush on him, nor was I going to mess this up. I was serious.

I had been feeling things that I hadn't felt in a long time, not since Florida. I felt fucking happy. He made me so happy. And I couldn't bear the thought of losing him.

I couldn't lose him.

Fuck. Please don't let me lose him.

"Want a drink?"

I glanced towards Riley before nodding and he dragged us over to the refreshments. He handed me a plastic cup of punch which I took but before I took a sip he shook his head, looked around to see if anyone was watching, the took out a miniature bottle of vodka from his inside pocket and poured some into my punch before I could stop him.

"I don't-"

"Heeeey! Belly!" I turned to see Emmett lumbering towards us, Rosalie hurrying after him. "How are you, Belly? Long time no sp-_hic_-speak!"

I arched an eyebrow. "Kind of early to be this wasted, isn't it, Em?"

Riley looked at me weirdly but I ignored him.

"Lighten up, Belly, it's a fuckin' party!"

When there was a drunk Emmett, all grudges were forgotten for the night. But I guess he had a point. If I didn't buck the fuck up and at least pretend to have fun people were gonna get suspicious which was exactly what I did not want.

So I smirked at both him and Rose before downing my plastic cup of spiked punch and handing it back to Riley for a refill.

"Whoop, whoop!" Emmett yelled, throwing his arms in the air. Rosalie rolled her eyes with an amused grin she tried to hide. I laughed and high-fived Emmett.

Riley shot me another accusing look that I totally didn't get but took the cup from him, grabbed his hand and pulled him into the middle of the gym where people were dancing.

I wrapped one arm around his shoulders, occasionally taking sips of my drink as we danced, rocking our bodies to the music. His hands were everywhere, on my hips, my waist. I was cautious as to not to let him go too far yet keep up the façade so people wouldn't notice. After all, I was Bella fucking Swan, and "fuck" was all but my middle name. People fucking _expected_ me to let him grope my ass. I felt a little sick at the thought of Riley touching me like that. Everything just felt wrong after everything had felt so right with Edward and just imagining anyone else touching me like that again made me shudder.

"You want another drink?" Riley half shouted into my ear over the music.

I nodded, not needing to stand on my tiptoes to kiss his cheek due to my heels.

He walked off through the crowd until he disappeared.

I felt numerous eyes watching me, clearly gawping at seeing Riley and I together and that was when I felt him. I felt his eyes watching me and I turned to see Edward, stood at the edge of the makeshift dance floor looking incredible in his charcoal grey suit and black tie against his crisp white shirt.

There was something in his eyes though, I didn't know what it was but his emerald orbs were haunted by something and I felt…no, I knew something was wrong. In that moment I didn't care that we were at school, I didn't care that he was my teacher, I was his student, I didn't care that we were surrounded by my peers and teachers – his students and colleagues – I _needed_ to talk to him. I could feel it. Something really wasn't right. I needed to fix it.

But all of a sudden he was gone from my view and in front of me stood Rosalie, in a stunning red dress that suited her perfectly, with a perfect blonde head of curls that were fucking blocking me from getting to Edward.

"Bella. I'm so fucking sorry."

"Rose, I really-" I tried to tell her that now really wasn't the time but she wouldn't let me talk.

"Bella, please, listen to me. You're my best friend, okay? You have been since we were fourteen and I fucking miss you. I don't give a fuck about what the fuck your problem is. You could have killed someone for all I care, I just want my best friend back." I finally looked at her, I mean, really looked at her and saw the purple marks under her eyes carefully concealed with make-up. I saw the tears in her eyes that she was trying to blink back and I actually listened to what she had to say. "I know I said some horrible things but I just…I worry about you, Bella. I fucking love you and it makes me crazy when you do stupid things that could end up getting you hurt. And I will not stop caring, but I miss you and I don't want to fight about it. So can we please, please get over this stupid fucking fight and just…hang out again?"

I gave her a small smile. "I love you, too."

She giggled through her tears and threw her arms around my neck. I hugged her back, "I'm sorry, too." I told her. "For everything I said. All that shitty stuff I said about Emmett and everything."

Rose pulled out of the embrace shaking her head, "It's okay. I mean, not all of it was true of course, like Emmett fucking some other girl but…but the stuff about me thinking everything is fucking perfect." She sighed, "It's not. Nothing is perfect but I want it to be so badly, because I love him so fucking much and I just want everything to…to be perfect."

I nodded, only now realising exactly what she meant, because I felt the same way. I wished everything with Edward and I could have just been easy. And to be honest I think if I were a few years older or if he was a few years younger, or fuck, if he weren't teaching at Forks everything _would_ be perfect. But we can't have fucking everything. And despite all of that, despite the fact that the odds were stacked against us I felt like I was who I was meant to be when I was with him.

In a world of Renee and Victoria and Charlie and Sue I finally felt like I wasn't alone when he was with me. I felt like I could fight against it all. I felt like we could fight against it all together. I felt like I, Bella Swan, _me_, I felt like I could get a fucking happily ever after despite all the shit going on in out lives.

And that's what Rose wanted. Fuck it's what everyone wanted. A fairytale.

"I understand." I told Rose.

She smiled sadly before exhaling heavily and shaking it off, she dabbed her fingertips under her eyes to make sure her make-up hadn't run before grabbing my hand and dragging me to the refreshment table where Riley and Emmett were leaning on each other, howling at something that was apparently fucking hilarious.

I shared a look with Rose and we rolled our eyes at the boys before taking their spiked plastic cups for ourselves, grabbed their hands and pulled them out onto the dance floor.

Riley spun me around in circles, laughing before he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind and swayed our bodies side to side – too slow for the upbeat, fast paced Black Eyed Peas. I pulled out of his arms but spun round to face him, keeping hold of his hand so he wouldn't think anything of it – so the rest of the school wouldn't think anything of it – and laughed with him and the rest of my friends as Emmett danced the fucking Chicken dance just because he felt like it.

Nearing the end of the night, I found myself sat at one of the tables placed around the edges of the gym, watching everyone dancing and laughing, some trying to point discreetly to me and then to Riley who was dancing with Emmett while Rose took pictures on her cell. I felt like my mission had been accomplished.

I took a deep breath and realised only then that for the past couple of days it had felt like something was sitting on my chest. I felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders. I felt like Edward and I could finally relax, I mean, sure, we weren't going to be sneaking around school as much as we used to, but perhaps we could go out more. The thought had me feeling fucking giddy.

My phone chimed and I pulled it out of my bra – best place to keep it when I didn't have a bag on me, and my dress hid it well. It was from Edward. I smiled as I opened it.

_You're beautiful tonight. You're beautiful always. Forever. Remember that. X _

My smile was from ear to fucking ear. But then I remembered. I remembered that look in his eyes. And suddenly the text no longer made me feel happy, it no longer made me want to smile. Maybe part of it was the alcohol, maybe I was dizzy, but the text made me feel sick. Something was sitting in the pit of my stomach and it felt like fucking dread. I felt like something bad was happening – just like when I looked into Edward's eyes tonight.

Suddenly I was on my feet and rushing out of the gym into the cold night. Fall was in the air tonight and it made me feel even worse. Like it was the start of something bad.

I ran to the parking lot, as fast as I could in my heels.

The sleek, black Vanquish was gone.

***FT***

"Did you have fun at Homecoming?" Seth asked as I drove us both to school on Monday morning.

He had stayed round his friend's Saturday night and didn't come home until late on Sunday so we hadn't really had a chance to talk. Not that I felt much like talking. Edward hadn't spoken to me at all since he sent that text at homecoming and the dread I felt in the pit of my stomach still hadn't left.

I shivered and Seth wound the window closed that he had opened when he first got into the truck. It was a little cloudy today and looked like there was going to be a storm.

"Yeah, it was okay." I murmured. "Did you have a good time? I saw you with Rachel." I had seen him for about five seconds before he and his new girlfriend drifted off into writhing the sea of people that was the student body, rocking and grinding on the dance floor.

Seth nodded enthusiastically, grinning, "Yep. She's my girlfriend."

He had told me this already. It was about the only thing he said to me before he wandered off into his bedroom with a dreamy look on his face eleven o'clock last night.

I gave him a small smile, "That's great, Seth, I'm happy for you. Just watch-"

"Yeah I know, watch out for Jacob. He's not gonna be a problem though, Rachel spoke to her dad and after he got suspended and everything I think he'll be leaving me alone."

I nodded.

"So…you and Riley looked like you were getting along."

I nodded.

"You dating each other?"

I gave a half shrug. "Not really. Just went to homecoming together."

Seth nodded but didn't say any more on the matter for which I was both grateful and confused. I mean, I liked to tease Seth about Rachel and sure he could take it, but the kid could dish it right back and yet he said nothing.

My phone chimed in my bag and I practically threw it at Seth, "Can you get my cell out?" I asked quickly.

His eyebrows rose but he did as I asked.

He passed me my phone and I glanced down to see it was a text from Rose. My heart sank.

"Expecting a text from someone?" Seth asked, eyebrow arched.

I shook my head. "No. It's no one. Doesn't matter."

Seth nodded but looked at me weirdly. The kid had been doing that a lot.

I sighed before parking the truck in a spot next to Rosalie's car.

Seth hopped out, calling a "See you later," over his shoulder before jogging over to Rachel and a group of his friends.

I started making my way to the cafeteria before I changed course and found myself rushing down the English corridor to Edward's classroom. He wasn't there. But a woman was.

She was sat at his desk, going through what looked like pop quizzes. I cleared my throat and she looked up.

"Hi," she said with a bright smile, "can I help you?"

"Oh, I, um…I was just wondering where Mr Cullen was. I had a question about the essay he set."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Mr Cullen isn't in today," she said sweetly, "but I can help if you like?"

"No thanks, that's uh, that's okay." I turned to walk out the door but spun round to ask another question. "Do you know when he will be back? Is he sick or…?"

The woman shook her head, "No, I think Mr Greene said something along the lines of an interview…I believe it was at a school in Chicago so I'm not too sure when he'll be back. If you have any questions I'm sure I could help-"

"No thank you." I was out the door before she could finish.

I found myself with my back pressed up against a locked stall door in the bathroom taking deep, heavy breaths, my hands trembling. I dropped my bag and fell to my knees retching to be sick. Nothing came up.

I sat back, leaning against the door, my hand on my rapidly rising and falling chest.

He was gone.

Edward was gone.

Why was he gone?

Why did he leave?

I needed him. Fuck. I _needed_ him.

I buried my face in my shaking hands and I felt drops of water hitting them like fucking bullets. I clenched my hand into a fist and bit down hard so no one could hear the silent sobs that engulfed me.

I told him everything, I told him fucking everything excluding _him _but I told him everything about my sister, I told him about my Renee and Charlie. He made me feel safe. I felt so fucking safe with him. I felt safe enough to tell him about those men. I quickly pushed myself forward as I retched again, sobbing, trying so fucking hard to hold it back.

It was me, I realised with a stabbing pain in my chest, I had driven him back to Chicago to the parents he despised because he was running from me.

He had left me. I needed him and he left me just like my mother, just like my sister. He had left me and I fucking deserved it.

I was tainted. I was fucked up in the head. I was fucking broken and he deserved better.

Last night came rushing back, when I felt like I was fucking capable of anything if he was with me – just like he always said I was. I felt like I was capable of a happy ending. This only made me cry harder because that had been a fucking lie. I hadn't lost anything. I had never had it to begin with.

And somehow that hurt more.

A fairytale just wasn't in the cards for me. I wasn't worth it. And he didn't think so either.

* * *

**Oh dear, Eddie's left :/ ... Please don't kill me!**

**Bella's dress can be found on my blogger and I will try to update as quickly as possible. **

**Review :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**These updates just keep getting faster and faster. To be fair I didn't want to leave you hanging off that little cliff I left for you guys in the last chapter so here you are :P ...**

* * *

Chapter Eleven

Monday.

Tuesday.

"I don't feel well."

Wednesday.

"Maybe we should call a doctor?"

Thursday.

"How are you feeling?"

Friday.

"She can go back in next week."

Saturday.

"Dinner's ready."

"Not hungry."

Sunday.

The phone goes unanswered.

Monday.

"Just one more day."

Tuesday.

"'M tired."

Wednesday.

"Are you okay?"

Thursday.

"Bella, enough is enough. You're either now well enough to back to school or you let me call a doctor, what's it gonna be?"

It was getting colder. I could see that from clouds rolling in.

"Bella."

Yet the sun was still shining through the window, fighting against the looming grey clouds overhead. But it was clear to see a storm was heading this way.

"BELLA!"

I jumped and turned to see Charlie stood next to his armchair where I sat, curled in a ball staring out the window. I hadn't sat in this chair for ages. I couldn't remember the last time I had sat in this chair. When Vicki and I used to come and visit Charlie, and I had a nightmare or just couldn't sleep or just wanted to spend time with my dad while he watched the game of T.V. he'd let me sit on his lap and cuddle with him. I had always been a daddy's girl.

Charlie's mouth seemed to be moving but I couldn't hear what he was saying.

"What?" I mumbled.

He heaved a huge sigh and rubbed his hand roughly over his face. When he spoke his voice seemed restrained, as though he was willing himself not to raise his voice. "I said you are going to school tomorrow. You're taking advantage of being "ill". You're better now and you're going to school."

I frowned. "What time is it?"

Charlie looked confused at my question. "It's four o'clock." He said as though it were obvious.

I glanced out the window again. Nothing had changed much in the past minute, the sun was still battling against the clouds and winning. Though it looked fairly low in the sky. "In the morning?"

Charlie stared. "No, Bella. In the afternoon."

I stared back at him. "School's finished, dad."

"I know."

"Well, then I can't go."

Charlie shook his head looking as bewildered as I felt. "Tomorrow, Bella. You're going to school tomorrow." He said slowly.

"What day is it?"

"Thursday."

"Oh." I murmured. I guess that made more sense. "Ok." I turned back to the window.

"That's it? You're not going to argue?"

I shook my head. He must have stood and stared at me for a long while because after what felt like at least five minutes I felt Charlie sit down on the arm of the chair and I looked back round and up at him.

"Bella," he said gruffly, clearing his throat. "Is…uh…is everything okay…with you?"

I nodded and turned away again.

"You know you can talk to me, about anything…don't you?" He sounded unsure.

I nodded again. Lying was okay when you were doing it to keep from hurting someone's feelings.

"You haven't been yourself lately. These past couple of weeks you've hardly said a word." I could feel him staring into the back of my head. "Bella, you'd tell me if something was wrong, wouldn't you?" His voice was soft and gentle. "'Cause you're kinda worrying me, kiddo."

I couldn't remember the last time he had called me that. He stroked my hair and I turned to face him with a nod. "I'm fine." I lied.

Charlie kissed the top of my head and wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

I don't know what came over me. My arms were suddenly wrapped tight around his waist, my face buried in his chest.

He slid down into the chair next to me and hugged me closer to him.

"Bella," he said, softly, into my hair. "You promise you're okay?"

I couldn't bring myself to say the words so I nodded again.

"I love you, kiddo, you know that, right?"

I nodded. "I love you, too, dad."

And I felt like I was seven years old again, sitting in this armchair with my dad. He even switched on the T.V. to watch football.

I think I fell asleep. I was woken from the first peaceful, nightmare-less nap I'd had in a long time by Sue's shrill voice.

"What are you doing?"

I opened my eyes groggily and found that Charlie had apparently fallen asleep too and was grimacing apologetically.

"I asked you to talk to her over an hour ago, your dinner's sitting stone cold on the kitchen table."

"Sorry, honey," Charlie mumbled, extracting his arm from around my shoulders. "I'll heat it up in the microwave."

"It's no good heated up, it's going to be ruined now." She stormed out of the living room, Charlie following her, apologising.

I yawned and stretched before lifting myself from the chair and heading slowly to my bedroom. I wasn't hungry. I'd probably throw up anything I ate, anyway. I climbed into bed and prepared for a restless night.

***FT***

_I stumbled as I ran through the trees, tripping over roots, gasping for air, whimpering in terror._

_Someone was chasing me. I could hear their feet pounding on the forest floor behind me and I tried to push myself harder. _

_I fell._

_They were getting closer._

_I struggled to get up but a hand grabbed at my ankle and I screamed._

_I kicked and thrashed and screamed, trying to get away when I turned and saw _him_._

He _was laughing, greeting me with a cold smile and something in _his_ eyes that had always been there when he wanted to _play_._

"_Bella."_

_I gasped and looked up._

_Edward was here. He was here. _

"_Edward!" I cried, reaching for him. "Edward, help."_

_He stood there, watching._

"_Edward, please," I sobbed, "please help me. He won't let go. He won't leave me alone."_

"_I'll leave you alone, Bella." He said, his voice distanced and emotionless._

"_No! Please! Edward, help me!"_

"_I can't. You're not worth it."_

_I was reaching for him, my hand outstretched._

"_Please!" I begged, my heart pounding so hard in my chest I was scared it was going to break._

_He was backing away._

"_No," I screamed, "No, Edward! Please! I need you!"_

_But he had already turned his back._

"_I can't, Bella. You're not worth saving." He disappeared through the trees._

_I was pulled backwards by my feet and thrown onto my back._

He _loomed above me with his horrible smile and eyes filled with something that made me want to be sick. _

"_It's play time, Bella boo." He smiled._

"_EDWARD!"_

My eyes snapped open and I sat bolt upright looking around, backing myself into the far corner of my bed so my back was against the wall. I faced the door, my knees pulled up to my chest and I wrapped my cover around me.

I was shaking and sobbing as I stared wide-eyed at the door, my heart thumping against my ribs, hammering in my ears. I tried to wipe the wetness from my face but sobs wracked my body and I hugged myself tighter, curling into a tight ball, never taking my eyes off the door.

It was the same nightmare I'd had every night for the past two weeks and yet it still had me sobbing and trembling, curled up in the corner of my bed, night after night. And there was nothing I could do to make the nightmares go away.

I hated myself as I tried to take deep breaths, praying to god that Charlie or Seth wouldn't hear me. But a part of me hoped they would. Because I was too fucking scared to reach over and turn my lamp on.

I tried pushing myself backwards with my feet, attempting to push my back further into the wall but it was futile. I couldn't get closer if I tried and my back was aching because of it.

I tried to swallow down the quiet sobs and ended up covering my mouth with my trembling hands to stop the barely above a whisper of a noise, but it was too loud in my ears and in the silence of the room. Years of practise meant I was able to put a stop to the sobs quickly but the tears still streamed silently from my eyes.

I pulled my duvet tighter around me for extra security but I didn't feel safe. Far from it. I hadn't felt safe since…since Edward had left.

I was glad he was gone. I didn't need him. I didn't fucking want him. I was mad as hell at him and if he ever came back I'd have to kill him.

I'd kill him for putting me through this. I'd kill him for bringing back the nightmares I hadn't had since I first saw him in his English classroom. I'd kill him for taking away the safety I felt just knowing he was in the same fucking town as me.

I hate him.

I crave him.

I need him.

He's gone.

He's not coming back.

A sob ripped from my chest and I buried my mouth into my duvet, keeping my eyes of the door. I rocked myself backwards and forwards, my eyes darting to the door, to my phone on my desk, back to the door again, working up the courage.

I lunged, grabbed my phone, snatched the shirt from the floor and scrambled back to the corner of my bed, my back pressed against the wall and covers wrapped tightly around me.

I fumbled with my phone, biting my lip to hold in more sobs, glancing up at the door frequently, then I found what I was looking for and my heart broke and pieced back together at the same time.

Edward smiled at me from my phone and I felt my body start to relax as I clutched his shirt tightly to me, holding it up to my face, inhaling deeply. Slowly, I stopped trembling and I slid further down into bed, keeping my legs curled up to my chest. I never took my eyes from Edward's.

I sniffled. I blinked and a tear rolled down my cheek. I muffled a sob into his shirt.

_Fuck. I miss you. _

***FT***

I stared up at my ceiling as I listened to the sounds of everyone in the house waking, showering, eating, talking, laughing. When I heard Sue leave for work and Charlie shortly after I decided it was time I had better get up.

I'd been awake for the past five hours and it was a fucking struggle but I did it.

I glanced out the window as I headed to the bathroom. The sun was still fighting.

I yawned and tried not to wince when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror. I tried to ignore the purple shadows under my reddened, dead looking eyes. My skin looked pale and sallow and my hair hung limply. I looked away and began to brush my teeth.

Seth was waiting for me in the kitchen, sat at the table, grinning at his phone. But his smile disappeared when he saw me and a frown took its place. I watched him as he looked me up and down, taking in my overlarge grey hoodie – the hood pulled up, the sleeves reaching my knuckles – shorts and Uggs. He took in my make-up-less face, my arms folded across my chest.

Yes, Seth. I look like shit. Surprised?

"C'mon." I murmured and turned to head out. He didn't say anything but I heard him following me to the truck.

"Are you okay?" He asked softly as I started the truck and pulled off the drive.

"Of course." I muttered. My voice sounded lifeless. Real fucking convincing, Bella.

"You don't look well. Maybe you really are sick."

"I'm fine, Seth, just leave it alone." That sounded harsh. He was just worried. "Please." I softened.

I saw him nod out the corner of my eye but he kept stealing glances at me throughout the drive to school when he thought I wasn't looking.

"We have a new English teacher," he said quietly. "Cullen was a jerk but at least he was good. She's awful."

I stiffened. I needed to respond. To say something. Do _something_. A strangled noise from the back of my throat reached my lips. It didn't sound anything like the "Mmhmm" I had intended but Seth seemed satisfied.

"She said Cullen had gone to Chicago for a job interview. I don't get why he would go for a job interview right at the beginning of the year. I mean, I know we've been back at school for nearly a couple of months now but it's really random-"

"Seth," my voice still sounded strangled and forced though this time there was a hint of desperation. My knuckles were turning white I was gripping the wheel so hard. "I'm about to be living through the hell that is high school, I don't need to hear about…okay?"

"…okay." He murmured and turned to look out the window.

_Fuck. I miss you._

_Bastard. _

As I pulled into school I could see Rosalie, Emmett and Riley all stood leaning against one of the benches right outside. I cringed when I noticed that they had all seen the truck. Brilliant. Just what I needed.

I mumbled a goodbye to Seth and we both headed in different directions. Him to his girlfriend and me to the sea of bloodthirsty sharks.

"Bella!" Rose cried rushing to meet me. She threw her arms around me and I awkwardly patted her back. "Where have you been?"

"Sick." I muttered as we walked closer to the guys.

"Why didn't you answer your phone? We all tried calling you."

I shrugged, "Tonsillitis."

Riley arched an eyebrow, "So you couldn't text?"

I shrugged again and sat down on top of the bench next to Emmett. Bad idea. He leaned in and sniffed.

"I smell bullshit." He grinned.

I scowled at him and hopped down from the bench, moving past Riley. He grabbed my forearm.

"Where are you going?" He demanded.

"Class." I shoved him out of my way and walked off without looking back. I could feel three pairs of eyes on me as I walked away and I couldn't have cared less. I wasn't in the mood to deal with a hyped up Rosalie, an irritating Emmett or Riley's fucking interrogating.

I really fucking hoped they got the message because I really was in the fucking mood today. Not one little bit.

Apparently people just weren't understanding. I had just sat down in my first lesson and pulled out all my books only to have Ms Cope come knocking at the door.

"I'm here to collect Isabella Swan. Mr Greene would like a word with her."

My teacher grunted his assent and I heaved a huge fucking sigh as I packed up all my things. I had been back for five minutes, what the hell was I meant to have done in that amount of time, considering my first lesson hadn't even officially started yet.

I skipped school. That's what I had done.

I didn't have a fucking doctor's note and therefore I was being punished, with a fucking after school to catch up on missed work. Because it would have been much too lenient on me to get notes from my classmates.

This day was shaping up to be one of my worst.

My lessons were shit. All my teachers seemed to think much the same way Mr Greene had about the whole situation and decided – for my own benefit, of course, otherwise how would I learn? – to call on me knowing I didn't have a fucking clue what they were talking about. I hadn't been here for two fucking weeks. Not only that but I was exactly paying attention. I was too focussed on the big gaping hole in my chest that made it so hard to breathe.

_Fuck. I miss you. _

Lunch wasn't much better.

Riley sat next to me and placed his arm on the back of my chair. What was his fucking problem? Why couldn't he just leave me alone.

"What's the matter with you?" Rose asked as she sat herself opposite me.

"After school detention."

She gaped. "How did you manage that? You just got back."

"Ditching." I mumbled.

"I thought you were sick." Riley said with a suspicious frown.

Seriously, fuck off.

"I was." I snapped. "I didn't have a fucking doctor's note."

"Well, surely you could get Charlie to talk to Greene." He said.

I shook my head. "It's easier to just have the detention."

"Well me and Em have football after school. I'll be here by the time you're finished. Maybe we could do something after. Jessica Stanley is having a party tonight."

I sighed heavily and was thankfully saved by Emmett.

"Uh, dude, I'm not at football after school."

"What? Why?"

"That new English teacher is a fucking bitch, that's why."

"Yeah!" Rose piped in. "She's tried to make us do this, like, six page essay on a book we haven't even studied. We tried to tell her that that's not what Cullen had us reading but she wasn't having any of it."

I tensed.

"What's that got to do with football?"

"I didn't finish it." Emmett grumbled. "She's making do the rest after school."

"You're telling me I have to deal with Newton whining like a bitch about Jessica by myself?" Riley groaned.

Emmett snickered through a mouthful of food, "Yeah. Have fun, dude." He swallowed then said, "We got no chance of winning the game, anyway. Not without Cullen."

Fucking hell. I thought I was going to throw up. Or cry. Or both. Shit.

Rosalie arched a brow, "What do you mean?"

"He was helping Coach coach us. He actually knew what he was talking about. Coach fucking stinks."

"Hey, Bella, you okay?" I looked up from my food to see Rose frowning at me in concern as I wrapped my arms around myself tightly.

I nodded, "Just not hungry. I'm gonna find Seth, I need to ask him something."

"Okay."

I stood and all but ran out of the cafeteria. I didn't have a clue where I was going but my feet carried me round to the back of the gym. I pulled out a cigarette with trembling hands and sucked in a breath, letting the smoke fill my lungs.

I slid to the ground and let my head fall back to the wall behind me, my eyes squeezed shut.

When I opened them the the sun was hidden behind a blanket grey cloudy that appeared all watery and blurred. I sniffed, wiping the tears from my face.

Why did it have to hurt so fucking much?

Why couldn't I catch a fucking break?

I just wanted someone to fucking stay. No. I just wanted him to stay. Just him. No one else. I didn't need anyone else. Was that so much to ask?

When the bell rang I flicked the cigarette to the ground, stood on shaky legs while brushing the wetness from my eyes and headed to English.

I didn't make it that far.

I ended up in the girls bathroom, puking my lunch up in one of the cubicles.

Looked like I wasn't gonna be able to stomach it.

***FT***

"Bella! Wait up."

I kept walking. "I'm not in the mood, Riley."

He caught me and spun me round.

I had just served my after school. Emmett was right, the new English teacher was a fucking bitch. Mr Greene had apparently decided that me catching up on all my classes meant doing an essay for her on a book that I had never heard of, let alone read. Who the fuck has a name like Miss Jane, anyway?

Not only had I sat there, staring blankly at the essay question for an hour, but I had to listen to nattering on the phone to her friend or some shit about fucking Edward. "I think he got a job in Chicago", "my boss says he has family there, apparently he was homesick or something and wanted to work closer to home", "Forks didn't suit well with him".

I was gripping my pen so hard to stop my hand from shaking it left imprints in my palm. It wasn't Forks he had a problem with, bitch, and he hates his fucking family. You don't know shit.

To top it off, the sun had lost. It was fucking raining. Not only that but there was thunder in the distance that was clearly heading this way.

"Hey, c'mon, I wanna talk to you." Riley said, pleadingly.

"I don't wanna talk, Riley, I want to go home." That was a lie. I didn't want to go back home. I didn't want to deal with the angry-mob-with-pitchforks that were my "family". I didn't know what would be waiting for me. I texted Charlie telling him I had an afterschool but he hadn't replied.

"Bella, just come out with me tonight. Come to Jessica's. It will be like homecoming. You didn't think you would have fun then, either."

My hands clenched to fists. I didn't want to talk about homecoming. I didn't want to remember that look in Edward's eyes. The look that had been telling me I was never going to see him again. The look I didn't understand until it was too late.

_You're beautiful tonight. You're beautiful always. Forever. Remember that._

I blinked back the tears in my eyes and swallowed the lump in my throat that was my fucking heart.

"I didn't have fun at homecoming, Riley. I don't want to talk about homecoming. I want to go home."

I tried to open the door to my truck but he wouldn't let me leave. Riley shut the door and spun me back round to face him.

"Don't fucking manhandle me, Riley," I shoved him away from me.

But he put his hands on my shoulders and pushed me so my back was against my truck. "Yes you did. You went with me, we had a good time, we fucking danced, Bella." He was smiling.

I shook my head. "I don't. Want. To talk about. Homecoming." I gritted through my teeth. "I don't want to go to Jessica's and I don't want to be with you, Riley. Accept that."

He frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I mean I don't want to be with you. I don't want to go anywhere with you. I don't want to date you."

He became angry. "It's that "E" guy, isn't it?" Riley growled, "You're fucking him, aren't you?"

I winced. I shook my head.

"Who is he, Bella? Huh? Do I know him?" He was towering over me, his voice getting louder as the thunder rumbled in the distance and the rain poured down.

"R-Riley, just leave it alone, it doesn't mat-"

"Tell me, Bella!" He shouted. He slammed his fist into the truck over my shoulder and I gasped, tears blurring my vision.

"You're scaring me, Riley. Move out the way." My voice shook despite my attempt at trying to shake it off. This was Riley. He wouldn't hurt me. Would he?

"FUCKING TELL ME!" His face was an inch from mine, I couldn't get away, I couldn't move, I was trapped.

"Hey!" A voice called in the distance.

Riley looked up, distracted. I took my chance.

My knee slammed up and connected with his crotch. He howled and doubled over, cupping himself. I yanked open the door and it smacked him in the head, sending him toppling to the ground with a groan.

I jumped into the truck, hearing somebody calling my name but I didn't stop. I pulled out of the lot as fast as I fucking could my tyres screeching on the wet concrete.

My windscreen wipers were flying full speed as the rain hammered down getting heavier and heavier the further I drove.

My heart was pounding, my chest heaving, my entire body trembling as I sobbed.

I knew that voice. I knew the voice that had saved me. I knew the voice that had called my name but I didn't want to hear it. I couldn't. Not now. Not when the owner of that voice had seen me in that position. Trapped and vulnerable and so fucking scared.

So I ran. I _was_ running. I was running from him.

I skidded my truck to a screeching halt and jumped out. I sprinted from the parking lot to the beach with one place in mind.

But I could still hear him. I could hear him over the thunder and lighting and the roaring of the waves and beating rain as it poured down on me.

I felt his hand wrap around my arm.

"NO!" I screamed over the deafening weather, throwing myself around to face him.

Fuck. He was here. He was really here, stood in front of me, soaked to the bone, his green eyes pained, his hair dripping.

_Fuck. I miss you._

"NO!" I shouted. "NO. YOU DON'T TOUCH ME. YOU DON'T GET TO TOUCH ME."

"Bella-" he tried to shout over the storm but I wouldn't let him.

"NO." I sobbed. "NO. NO. NO. NO. NO" I shook my head, backing away.

"Please-"

I couldn't seem to stop my head from shaking back and forth, my heart breaking, swelling, thumping, breathing. The rain mingled with the tears on my face.

"Why are you here?" I shouted.

"I needed to see you," he yelled back.

"You were gone."

"I know. I'm sorry." He sounded so broken. But it was nothing. It was nothing compared to what he did to me.

"You're sorry?" I laughed incredulously, I sounded fucking hysterical. "YOU'RE SORRY?"

"Bella-"

I turned and ran. But I didn't know why. Why was I running? I wanted him back, right?

But he hurt me. He hurt me so fucking bad.

He grabbed my arm again.

"I TOLD YOU EVERYTHING." I screamed. I hit him. "I TOLD YOU FUCKING EVERYTHING." I hit him again. And again, slapping him, pounding my fists into his chest. "I OPENED UP TO YOU, I TOLD YOU MY DARKEST FUCKING SECRETS AND YOU THREW IT ALL BACK IN MY FACE." He struggled to restrain my hands to keep me from hitting him. "YOU FUCKING JUDGED ME. YOU LEFT. YOU FUCKING LEFT. You left." I broke. I shoved away from him, wrapping my arms around myself. Trying to protect myself from the wind, the rain, the thunder, from him.

He shook his head, tears in his eyes. "Never, Bella," he yelled over the howling wind. "I never judged you. Never. I wouldn't ever-"

"YES YOU DID-"

"NO!" He roared, "NO, BELLA.-"

"THEN WHY?" I screamed, "WHY DID YOU LEAVE? I TRUSTED YOU AND YOU LEFT JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE." I sobbed.

"I LEFT FOR YOU. I LEFT _FOR YOU_, BELLA." He stepped closer until he was hardly an inch away from me. "I SAW YOU AT HOMECOMING WITH RILEY AND YOUR FRIENDS. YOU LOOKED SO FUCKING HAPPY AND CAREFREE AND LIKE A FUCKING TEENAGER. I WAS TAKING THAT AWAY FROM YOU."

I shook my head furiously, "No. Don't you DARE turn this around on me. Even if that were true why would you fucking leave?"

"BECAUSE I CARE ABOUT YOU, BELLA." Edward yelled. I stared, through my tears, through the rain, through his tears. "YOUR HAPPINESS WAS MORE FUCKING IMPORTANT TO ME THAN MINE."

I didn't know what to say.

"I L- CARE ABOUT YOU SO FUCKING MUCH, BELLA. I THOUGHT I WAS HURTING YOU, HURTING YOUR CHANCES OF HAVING A NORMAL LIFE AND I COULDN'T LIVE WITH MYSELF KNOWING IT WAS ME THAT WAS HURTING YOU. I _NEVER_ WANT TO HURT YOU. I COULDN'T FUCKING STAND IT." He took my face in his hands, gently but firmly, as though trying to shake some sense into me.

"WHY ARE YOU HERE?" I shouted over the thunder but my voice was weakening, my resolve was weakening. My hands went to his wrists to pull his own away from me, but as soon as they were gone and I had backed away I wanted them back, I wanted him to hold me. It was the first fucking contact I'd had with him in two weeks and I just pushed him away. "WHY DID YOU COME BACK, WHY NOW?"

"I WAS BROUGHT TO MY FUCKING SENSES, OKAY?." He shouted to be heard. "I REALISED I NEED YOU AS MUCH AS YOU NEED ME." He shook his head. "I NEED YOU, BELLA. I NEED YOU SO FUCKING BAD."

He needed me. He needed me. He needed me like I needed him.

"YOU…YOU DON'T H-HATE ME?"

He stared before he got angry. "HOW COULD YOU FUCKING SAY THAT, BELLA? OF COURSE I DON'T HATE YOU. HOW COULD I HATE YOU? I'VE NEVER FELT ABOUT ANYONE THE WAY I FEEL ABOUT YOU."

I stared as the tears I thought had ceased began again, streaming down my face. He cared about me. He really cared. He hadn't left because of everything I told him, he wasn't repulsed or disgusted or freaked the fuck out. He didn't hate me. He left for me because he wanted me to be happy. And in that moment I didn't care that he had left, I didn't care, I just wanted him to hold me, I wanted to be back in his arms. I wanted to feel safe for the first time in weeks.

"Edward," I sobbed. My voice was barely above a whimper but he heard me.

I threw myself at him as he lunged to pull me into his arms. My mouth was on his, my hands in his hair, holding him to me, making sure he didn't get away. His arms were wrapped around my waist, holding me to him as my legs wrapped around his waist.

"Bella," he breathed between kisses. "God, Bella. I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry. I'm here, baby."

I sobbed into his neck as he kissed down mine, his hand in my hair, cradling my head.

"I'm here," he murmured continuously as he walked, carrying me through the storm, to the place we could be together.

"Fuck," he muttered when we got there.

"In my pocket." I breathed into his ear before burying my face back into the crook of his neck.

I felt his hand slide into the back pocket of my shorts and pull out the key. He unlocked the door and stepped inside, taking us into the warmth, into the dry. He carried me to the chair and sat me down, crouching down in front of me because my arms were still wrapped around his neck, not letting go. He kissed from my temple, down the side of my face, my neck as his hands unzipped my hoodie and pulled it from my body.

I shuddered when I suddenly realised how fucking freezing I was. He kissed by bare shoulder, pulling off my shirt and unfastening my bra, throwing it to the floor with the rest of my clothes. My shorts and panties soon followed as did Edward's clothes, as drenched as my own.

Then he lifted me back into his arms, my legs again wrapped around his waist, as we lifted the canopy for us to crawl under then lifted the duvet. He placed me gently in bed and moved to lay beside me before pulling the covers over us both.

Our legs tangled together and I buried myself into his chest, shivering as his arms pulled me close and tight, our bodies flush, sure never to let go.

I breathed in his scent, revelling in the feeling of safety, of security, of fucking bliss.

I sniffled and he kissed the top of my head.

"Don't do that again," I whispered, the thunder now seeming far away and distant rather than right outside the door of the hideaway.

His arms tightened around me, "Never, I promise."

"I can't deal with that, Edward." I breathed, "Not after everything else, I can't…I…" I shuddered.

He turned on his side and lowered himself so his eyes were level with mine. He stroked a tear from my cheek, his eyes pained. "Shhh," he soothed, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "I won't hurt you like that, again, Bella. I can't. I won't. Fuck, I never meant to, I just wanted you to be happy. I thought you could never be happy with me holding you back. I just...fuck-" he shook his head a crease between in his brows. His pain and anguish and self-loathing was so fucking strong I could almost taste it.

"Shhh." I kissed the wrinkle between his eyebrows before my eyes closed and I rested my forehead against his. His hands was still smoothing small circles into my cheek with his thumb while his other was clutched in one of mine.

I felt his lips press tenderly to the skin below my eyes. "You look so tired," he breathed.

"I am." I whispered back. "Haven't been sleeping."

"Me neither." The tip of nose stroked up and down my own. His fingertips traced softly over my features.

"What happened in Chicago?" I asked, my breathing evening out.

"Not much. I moped."

I opened my eyes, "Didn't you have an interview?"

"Oh, that." He rolled his eyes, "It was more of a chance for my father to moan and groan and whine about my career choice and try to convince me to change my mind rather than an interview. But aside from that I mostly spent my days, wallowing in self-pity in a hotel room just thinking, _fuck, I miss you._"

My eyes widened.

"What he asked?"

I just pressed my lips to his, running my fingers through his hair as he hummed into the kiss.

"Wait…" I asked, "so the interview wasn't at another school, it was with your father?"

Edward nodded his head, "I told Richard – Mr Greene, whatever – that I had an interview, I guess he would have assumed it was for a position at a school."

"Are you going to get your old job back at Forks?"

He frowned, "My _old_ job? It still _is_ my job."

"What?"

"I didn't quit, Bella. I just had an "interview"."

"Oh," I mumbled before closing my eyes again. "Good. Because your replacement is shit."

Edward chuckled, "Really?"

"Mmhmm. Even Seth said you were better and he think's you're a jerk. To be fair to him, though, it's because I painted a pretty bad picture, telling him you always picked on me and confiscated my phone."

Edward stiffened.

I opened my eyes. "What?"

"Have you spoken to Seth?"

I frowned, "About what?"

"About me?"

"Yeah, I just told you-"

Edward shook his head, "I mean recently."

"Well, it was only this morning that he called you a jerk but preferred you to "Miss Jane"."

Edward stared…"Bella,"

"Yes?"

"You know I said I was brought to my senses?"

I nodded.

"Well it was actually some_body_ who brought me to my senses."

"Okay…" I said slowly, not understanding where this was going.

Edward emerald orbs were searching my face for something until he decided that he couldn't find it and said, "Bella…_Seth_ brought me to my senses."

I frowned, "Huh?"

He smoothed some hair away from my face and murmured, "Seth called me. He got my number off your cell and called me."

"What?! Why? How?" I gasped.

"He's a smart kid, I always thought so, he figured out we were seeing each other." He watched me carefully, seeing the million and one questions in my eyes. "Maybe you should talk to him about that but…he called me to defend you. He was yelling at me down the phone giving me what for and he said…" Edward swallowed thickly, a frown marring his beautiful face, anguish in his eyes. "…he said I had broken you. I asked him what he meant, I didn't think you would be hurting, Bella, if I had known the hurt I was going to cause you I never would have-"

"Shhh," I placed a finger over his lips, "it's okay."

He was still frowning but he nodded. "He told me everything, Bella. He said you had hardly spoken a word for over a week, that you hadn't been to school. He said you'd been having nightmares," fuck, I didn't know he had heard me, "and I told him I left because I wanted you to be happy." Edward laughed through his nose a little, "He calmed down a little after that. He's very protective of you, you know, he loves you." He kissed my temple. "When he told me everything I realised you were coping with everything as badly as I was. I booked the first flight out and got here as fast as I could. I drove to school straight from the airport. I didn't think you were going to be there and I knew I couldn't just knock on your front door. I had just told Mr Greene I was back and then I saw you and Riley." He frowned.

Fuck.

"Bella, what was going on?"

I sighed and supressed a shudder, curling closer to Edward and he tightened his arms around me in response. "He was angry. He wanted me to go to a party with him, I said no, told him I didn't want to date him and he got mad." I ran my fingers over Edward's pecs. "He saw the note you put in my locker, or rather he saw that I had a note from "E" but didn't know the content. He got real jealous, real quick and he got mad." I snuggled impossibly closer.

Edward was silent for a long while and I looked up to see his eyes squinted shut. When he spoke it was clear he was trying to keep his anger at bay. "Did he hurt you?"

I shook my head furiously, "No, he didn't lay a hand on me. I swear." I snorted, "I kneed him in the balls though."

"That's my girl," I could hear the smile in his voice as he kissed the top of my head. His voice was more serious when he said, "Bella, if he ever scares you or gets too close for comfort or…_anything_…promise me you'll tell me."

I nodded slowly, "I promise."

Edward leaned over and kissed my mouth firmly, but so fucking tenderly like I was the most precious fucking thing in the world.

It was silent for a while after that but never uncomfortable. We were both content to just be in each other's arms listening to the storm rage outside while we were warm, and dry and safe.

I was nearly asleep when Edward spoke again, with amusement in his voice.

"I never liked you anyway?" He asked, referring to the soaked tank top he had peeled off me earlier.

I shrugged one of my shoulders sheepishly, blushing.

"God, I missed you," Edward grinned kissing both my cheeks.

Then he kissed the tip of my nose. I crinkled it. He chuckled.

I was seconds away from sleep when he kissed my lips so softly, like feathers brushing across my mouth, and he whispered something in my ear.

But I was too far gone to hear what it was.

All I knew was that I could sleep. The nightmares weren't coming back. I was safe.

* * *

**And there it is! I know they weren't kept apart very long, well technically it was two weeks :P but I just couldn't bring myself to do it.**

**I hope you're all happy that they're back together. Some more talking will need to be done between the two of them but we'll save that for later chapters.**

**I would just like to say, I updated pretty quick and Eddie and Belly are back together...I think that calls for some...I don't know...**

**Reviews! ;)**

**Bella's clothes can once again be found on my blog. **


	12. Chapter 12

**Nice long chapter and I'm thinking one of my favourites yet :) hope you like it too! **

* * *

Chapter Twelve

I woke to the feeling of Edward's lips pressing sweet butterfly kisses to my face and every bit of skin he could reach. I smiled, stretching my arms above my head and arching my back, my eyes still closed as his mouth met mine.

I hummed into the kiss then turned over to lie on my tummy, burying my hands underneath my pillow, ready to go back to sleep.

I heard him chuckle before I felt him leaning over me, his chest against my back and he brushed some of my hair out of his way so he could kiss all along my bare shoulder.

"Wake up, baby," he murmured.

I shook my head, "Uh uh."

Edward laughed softly again, nuzzling his nose into my neck. "Come on, sweetheart," my tummy fucking fluttered, "Seth called."

I opened one eye to see Edward's smiling face, peeking round my shoulder.

"He didn't go home after school," Edward explained. "He said he was at his friends but told your dad that he was with you. Said you went to see a movie in Port Angeles."

I flipped myself over lazily and yawned, "I love that kid." Edward grinned, nodding. "So, remind me again why that means I have to wake up. That was the best sleep I've had in a long time."

He leaned down to kiss down my neck and along my collarbone. "It's nearly six. You need to meet Seth before you can both go home. He said he can't cover for much longer or Charlie will get suspicious."

I sighed as I ran my fingers through his bed head hair a frown forming on my face. Edward looked up when he felt me tense.

"Baby? What wrong?" He asked, concern lacing his voice as the backs of his fingers brushed my cheek. I grabbed his hand in mine, focussed on it intently as I played with his fingers.

"I want to stay with you," I breathed, so quietly I almost didn't hear it. I felt so fucking needy.

"Oh, Bella," Edward frowned. He wrapped his arms around me and rolled us over so I was lying on top of him. But he didn't stop there. Our legs tangled together and he continued rolling until I was on the other side of him, both of us lying on our sides facing each other. His forehead was resting against mine, our eyes level and with the hand of his free arm, which wasn't wrapped around me and holding me close, caressed my face softly. "Listen to me for a second, okay?"

I nodded.

"Look at me, baby."

I lifted my gaze to meet his sincere one.

"I know you have no fucking reason to trust me, and I don't blame you for that, not even a little bit, that's my fault completely. But I promise you, Bella, with everything that I am, that I'm not going anywhere. I swear on my family's lives – and I don't mean my parents – that I will never leave Forks without telling you where I'm going and why and how long for." The honesty in his voice was hard to deny. I swallowed thickly as my eyes watered a little. His mesmerising green eyes were so full of sincerity and concern and promise and something I couldn't identify but it made me feel so much better. "And I promise you, unless I get hit by fucking lightning or something-" I laughed through my nose and he smiled, "that I will always, _always _come back to you."

I couldn't say anything in fear of my voice so shaking so I gave him a genuine watery smile and wrapped my arms around his neck. His arms moved to around my waist and pulled me impossibly closer.

"And it's not going to be long before you see me again, anyway." He said casually, "We've got a date tomorrow."

I pulled back to look at him and rose and eyebrow, "Oh we do, do we?"

"Of course," he said, oh so seriously, "you didn't forget did you, Bella? You wouldn't possibly hurt my feelings like that, now, would you?"

"Oh never," my eyes widened in exaggeration, "of course I didn't forget, I just temporarily couldn't remember."

He smiled as though thoroughly satisfied with my answer, "Good," he said with a proud nod.

I rolled my eyes and let my laugh escape my lips.

"God, you're beautiful," he breathed, his gaze turned absolutely adoring.

I rolled my eyes again but this time it was accompanied with a blush, which made him chuckle.

"So where are we going?" I asked, trying to distract him from the redness of my cheeks and my embarrassment.

"Oh that's for me to know and you to find out."

"But then how am I supposed to know what to wear?" Yes, I played the girl card, but I wanted to fucking know. I had only just found out he was taking me on a date and the suspense was already killing me.

Edward laughed seeing right through me, "Wear a dress, something fairly…sophisticated."

I stared at him, "That's real fucking helpful."

He chortled, "Well, I'm wearing a suit and tie if that helps?"

I gave a half shrug, not wanting to let on that it kinda was. "Short or long dress?"

"Whichever you prefer, just make sure its classy."

I nodded, "Okay."

"Come on," Edward said after a little while of complete bliss in which we just lay together. "We better get going."

I sighed watching Edward's fucking perfect ass and smirked a little at his tattoo as he got out of bed and began pulling on his boxers. I sat up and the covers fell to below my waist.

Edward's eyes widened before he turned around so fast I thought he would topple over.

I laughed, "What the fuck was that? You've seen me naked many a time before."

"If I see you naked I'm gonna want to start something we can't finish. We need to go."

I laughed harder before hopping out of bed and pulling on my own clothes.

"Speaking of naked," Edward said. Again I laughed harder until tears formed in my eyes. "What?" He asked, his voice almost a whine, wanting to know why I was laughing at him.

"Who says that?" I chortled, fastening my bra. "Who _ever_ starts a sentence with "speaking of naked…"?"

Edward narrowed his eyes teasingly at me. "You know I was about to give you some vital information about tomorrow but if you're just going to laugh at me…" he let his threat hang in the air.

"No, no, no, I wanna know. Tell me, please!" I begged. Yeah. I know. I must really fucking like this guy if I resorted to begging when I was around him.

He grinned as he tied his shoes and watched me pulling on my hoodie. "Well, as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted…speaking of naked…" he watched me carefully and a slammed my mouth shut to stop myself from laughing, he smiled. "You'll need to bring something to sleep in. You're staying at my house."

***FT***

Edward followed me back to Forks where I was to meet Seth at school, he sent me a wink as I pulled into the lot and he drove passed heading home.

Seth jumped into the passenger seat and sent me a look as I stopped the engine.

I turned around in my seat to face him.

"Hi," I said.

"…hi?" Was his response.

I smiled, "So…you know then, huh?"

He nodded sheepishly.

"How long for?"

He gave half a shrug, "A while." After a look from me he sighed, "I found out the Monday before homecoming."

I gaped, "How?"

"I went into your room to ask you about my English homework – I wasn't snooping around, I swear!" I brushed off his panic with a wave of my hand and he continued. "You weren't in there but your laptop was open. There was a picture of…err…Mr Cullen…on the screen."

I thought back to that day and realised what he was talking about. It was right after I'd had that horrible phone conversation with Edward and he told me to go to homecoming with Riley – I really needed to talk to him about that. I came back upstairs and my laptop was shut, at the time I hadn't thought anything of it.

"Oh," I murmured. I really should have been more careful. Shit, I mean anyone could have walked into my room – had it been anyone other than Seth, I would probably be in some boarding school in England right now and Edward would be in jail – if Charlie had anything to do with it. But it was going to get easier now, Edward said we could spend more time at his. I grinned.

Seth was looking at me weirdly before I realised I was smiling like a lunatic.

"Look, I know this is…awkward for you, but I would really freaking appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone about this, Edward, too."

Seth made a face, "Edward?"

I rolled my eyes, "Yes, Edward."

"You know I won't tell anyone." He said seriously.

I nodded. I pursed my lips. "So…you called him?"

Seth looked uncomfortable again but his voice was determined and adamant, "I had to. As soon as I heard he'd left and you stopped going to school and stopped talking and stopped…everything, I knew it was his fault." He became angry and I felt something warm in my chest at the thought of him being angry on my behalf. "I wasn't just gonna let him walk away after he had hurt you so much. But…as it turned out, he really thought he was doing you a favour, I was still angry but once he heard how…how broken you were," he shrugged, "I guess he realised what a mistake he had made and said he was coming back on the first flight out."

Seth said this all as if it were no big deal. As if he hadn't fucking fought for my honour and in the process brought Edward back to me. Edward – who I apparently couldn't fucking function without. This kid was fucking amazing.

I launched myself at him and I barely had a second to laugh at the shock on his face before my arms wrapped tightly around him and I hugged him tight.

"Thank you." I breathed, never feeling so grateful in my entire life than I did right then. There was nothing else I could say, nothing I could do to make Seth realise how much this meant to me. It was then that I realised that I didn't just have one person who cared about me, I had a little brother, too. "Thank you."

I felt his arms wrap around me and heard the smile and sincerity in his voice when he said, "You're welcome."

And that was it. Nothing else needed to be said. It was an unspoken agreement. Seth had been covering for me ever since he moved in but we both knew now, we had each other's backs, for the rest of our fucking lives. I decided then that I was going to make a point of spending more time with him. He was my brother now. Completely.

I brushed my hand quickly under my eye and wiped away the tear before he saw it, ruffled Seth's hair, then pulled away and started the truck.

***FT***

On the way home Seth and I practiced what we were going to say to Charlie and Sue so we were totally prepared for the interrogation that came our way over dinner.

"What did you see?" Charlie asked.

"Oblivion." Seth said with a grin.

"Any good?"

I shrugged my shoulder, "I wouldn't know," Sue glared suspiciously at me before I said, "I didn't understand it."

Charlie snorted and Seth laughed.

"Well, I can say it was pretty good, but the less intelligent and uneducated clearly don't know a good movie when they see it." Seth had actually gone to see the movie with his friend tonight so he really did know what he was talking about.

I stuck my tongue out at Seth. "Couldn't even enjoy the eye candy, Tom Cruise is way too short my taste."

Seth laughed as Charlie choked on his drink.

Leah watched the exchange with beady little eyes, flicking her food around her plate with distaste while Sue pursed her lips.

"You know you really shouldn't have gone to the movies, tonight, Bella." She said.

Here we go. "And why's that?" I muttered.

"You had an afterschool detention, did you not? Why do you think that earned you the right to have a night out?"

I rolled my eyes, "It was hardly a night out, it's half seven for crying out loud. And the detention was completely unjustified. I didn't have a doctor's note."

Sue said bitterly, "It doesn't matter what you got the detention for, the point is you had one."

I stared, "That is so wrong, on so many levels."

"Yeah," Seth chortled, "that's like saying it doesn't matter you weren't home in time for dinner, the point is you got hung for it, so burn in hell."

I grinned at him.

"Seth, stay out of this." Sue snapped.

"Oh come on, Sue, can we at least eat our meal in peace before we start world war three?" Charlie muttered.

The step monster looked like Charlie had just slapped her.

She ignored him the rest of dinner and went to bed not long after, stomping up the stairs in a strop. It was a good fucking day.

_What time are you picking me up tomorrow? x _

I texted Edward as I lounged on the couch with Seth, Charlie sat in his armchair, Leah off doing god knows what, god knows where. He responded quickly.

_About 7pm, is that okay? xx_

I bit my lip to keep in a squeal because he sent me two fucking kisses. I rolled my eyes. We could fuck like bunnies and I didn't bat an eyelash. He sends me kisses over text and I want to scream like a banshee.

Okay, that makes the sex sound bad but its really not. Really, _really_ not.

I turned my attention to Charlie before I got all hot and bothered. "Dad?"

He grunted in response to tell me he was listening while his eyes were glued to the T.V.

"Mind if I go stay at Rosalie's tomorrow night?"

"What will you be doing?"

"Watch movies – that actually make sense." I dug my toe playfully into Seth's side and he rolled his eyes. "We've got a biology thing to work on, as well. That okay?"

"I guess. How're you getting there?"

"She's gonna pick me up at seven."

"Oh, well, Sue and I will be in La Push so we won't be here to see you off."

Perfect. "That's fine."

_That's perfect xx_ I told Edward.

_Can't fucking wait, baby xxx_

_Me neither. What's with all the kisses? I _am_ being spoiled x_

_This is nothing, you wait 'til tomorrow. And where the hell are mine? Xxx_

I laughed and Seth gave me a small kick telling me to knock it off. I stuck my tongue out at him. It's not like Charlie knew who I was texting, for all he knew Rose could have said something hilarious.

_You ain't getting nothin' 'til you tell me where we're going._

_I'll just have to suffer in silence then, won't I?_

_Hey, you're in my bad books until you tell me where we're going. You take the kisses away you got nothin' that's gonna get you laid tomorrow._

_Hahahaha oh I beg to differ. You wait xxx_

_Please tell me. Please. Please Edward xxxxx_

_I can't see you doing puppy dog eyes and I'm using this to my advantage. Bribery isn't going to work either. Sorry, baby xxxx_

I glared at my phone and Seth looked at me as if saying "what the fuck?". I shook my head before replying to Edward.

_I hate you. _

_You don't honestly think you can lie to me, do you, baby? xxx_

_Now I hate you more. _

_Haha, keep telling yourself that xxx_

I don't know why but I felt like he was uncertain. Through a fucking text I felt like he wasn't one hundred percent certain that I _didn't_ hate him, even just a little bit, for what he did.

_You're right, I'm just in total denial xxx_

_Good to know :) xxx_

Edward and I spent the night texting then he called me when I heard Charlie snoring downstairs on the couch – Sue was clearly still pissed.

At around half three in the morning just as I was drifting off, a "Goodnight, beautiful." was whispered into my ear.

***FT***

Knock, knock, knock.

Knock, knock, knock.

BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG–

"What?!"

Seth opened his door abruptly, his hair sticking in all directions, dressed in his sweats and a t-shirt, having just been woken so rudely from his sleep.

"Get up." I said with a grin.

He stared, not at all happy.

"I am up. Some lunatic woke me about five seconds ago, trying to bash my door down. I'm now stood here talking to her when I could be sleeping. It's eight am on a Saturday morning."

"Ah this is true, but said lunatic brings news of a free house and is holding coffee and cookies while hoping lazy ass teenager can smell the cooked breakfast waiting downstairs and can hear the PS3 begging to be used for an all-day war." I waggled my eyebrows.

He stared at me for a minute then said, "Let me get dressed."

Four hours later we were still sat on the couch in front of the T.V. a bag of chips, popcorn and every possible snack food sat between and around us as we shot at aliens or zombies or whatever the fuck they were.

I pretended not to know.

It was fun watching Seth laugh at me smugly in the beginning and he was quite within his rights to do so – hey, I'm a girl, what would I know about a PS3, right?

Wrong.

He was getting his ass kicked.

"Man, you suck!"

"I do not!" He was tapping furiously at buttons, a frown of serious concentration on his face.

I laughed, "Dude, you look like your constipated."

"Dude," he mimicked, "just keep your eyes on the screen."

I laughed again, "You're just pissed because I don't even need to look at what I'm doing to whoop your ass."

Seconds later I exploded every member of his Seth's team and his character avatar thing as well.

"How did you do that?!" He gaped.

"You'll never know." I winked before hopping off the couch to get a drink. "Want a soda?"

"I think you owe me one."

I arched an eyebrow as he followed me into the kitchen, "I just annihilated you in every game we've played and yet I'm the one who owes you a drink? How does that work, exactly?"

"You lured me out of my bed under false pretences."

"And what would those pretences be?"

"You offered me a fry up and coffee and cookies and chips and popcorn, fattened me up and got me all nice and sweet so I would let you beat me at PS3."

I laughed hard, "Oh yeah, that's totally what happened. It's got absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you're awful at it."

"I am not awful at PS3, okay, ask Leah."

I stared at him. "You got Leah to play with you?"

"When we first got it, it was a few years ago."

"Seth, if you think a game against Leah is a good show of your skills then you're worse than I thought."

Seth rolled his eyes with a grin, "Oh really, how do you know I haven't just been warming up, reeling you in so I can take you down when you're least expecting it?"

"Because we've been playing for four hours." I deadpanned. "Face it, Seth, you lost to a girl. Why don't you go tell Rachel that?" I smirked.

"I want a rematch." He groused.

"Later, I'm making us lunch."

"Ha! You're just scared."

"Of beating your ass…_again_?"

He stuck his tongue out.

"How mature. You're such a sore loser. Definitely not a trait you want your girlfriend to see."

"Does _Cullen_ know how competitive you are?"

"Not yet," I smiled.

"I think I better warn him." Seth muttered.

I flung the dish towel at him. He laughed, catching it before flicking it back at me and then ran for it.

"Make me a sandwich woman."

"Oh you did not just say that!" I ran after him.

Turned out Seth couldn't fight for shit either, I pinned him to the couch.

"You're so violent!" He laughed trying to fight me off.

"Does Rachel know you get taken down by girls?"

"What's your obsession with my girlfriend? Is there something you wanna tell me? Or maybe you're waiting to tell Cullen first that you bat for the other team?"

"Oh you wanna play ball, now, do you?" I stood up, flipping my hair over my shoulder before heading to the back garden.

"Where are you going?" Seth asked.

"To get the baseball bat."

"You're serious?" He wondered as I pulled on my shoes.

"Deadly. You coming?"

Seth laughed and followed me outside telling me how amazing he was at baseball and how he was gonna thrash me.

"You said that about the PS3, dude, but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt – for your girlfriend's sake more than anything else."

***FT***

Well, we found something that Seth was good at. Smashing bedroom windows with baseballs – but hey, at least it was Leah's room.

"Mom's gonna kill me," he whined as I began boiling pasta for his dinner. He wanted to order pizza but after all the junk we ate today I thought a nutritious dinner was in order. Besides, we were both starving – we never got around to eating lunch – and it would have been quicker to cook mac and cheese anyway. So maybe it wasn't the healthiest but I could throw some broccoli in there.

"Please, she wouldn't even think to do such a thing. No, the woman's definitely gonna have it in for me." I glanced up at him with a pout, "You'll come to my funeral, right?"

He laughed, "Yeah, she really doesn't like you."

I snorted, "Thanks, Seth."

He chortled, "I didn't mean it like that. I just don't understand why. I mean, you seem pretty cool to me."

I grinned, "Well that's because I'm the coolest person ever!"

"Well, you're nicer than Leah. She's just a hormonal pain in the neck."

I laughed, "She a girl, we're all hormonal. You wait 'til you and Rachel have your first fight. She's gonna go all bitch-fit on your ass."

Seth gulped making me laugh more.

"Seriously, though, Leah hardly even talks to me. You give me a ride to school, you hang out with me, she never does any of that and yet you're the one mom hates."

I gave a small shrug, "What fifteen year old boys think is cool, isn't the same as what forty-odd year old mothers think is cool."

"But she's really harsh to you, like she says all that crap about your mom and-" He stopped abruptly when he saw me tense. "Bella, crap, I'm sorry, I didn't mean…oh crap."

I turned to face him with a small smile, "It's fine, don't worry about it."

He was quiet as I made the cheese sauce then he hesitated before asking cautiously, "What…what exactly happened…with…with you and your mom…and your sister?"

My phone chimed in my pocket.

Saved by the bell.

_What colour dress you wearing, baby? xxx_

I frowned, what did that have to do with anything?

_Wine red. Is that okay? Shall I send a picture or something? xxx_

_No, thats ok, just checking. See you later xxx_

I pocketed my cell before answering Seth, "That is a long, sad, pathetic story that needs vodka shots to accompany it, and you're too young for that." I grinned at him, making light of the loaded question that sent pain shooting through my entire body. "Maybe I'll tell you when you're old enough to have an alcohol problem."

Seth smiled but I could see the worry in his eyes along with the burning curiosity, but the kid was too kind to push me and ask again and I thanked the lord for it.

"Right," I said, placing his dinner down in front of him, "I'm gonna go and get ready."

Just as I had my foot out the door he said, "Bella?"

I turned, "Yeah?"

"Thanks. For today, I mean. It was pretty awesome."

I smiled, skipped back to kiss his cheek, before hopping out the kitchen calling, "You're welcome," over my shoulder.

***FT***

_I'm outside, sweetheart xxx_

I had to literally bite my lip so I wouldn't squeal like the girl I was. I had told him earlier no one was here but Seth so he could park out the front and now he was here!

I made a last minute check in the mirror, smoothing out my boob-tubed yet classy, red-wine dress and made sure my hair was still in the perfectly styled, loose, effortless curls. I double checked the price stickers weren't still on the bottom of my pale, gold studded heels.

I sent a quick reply to Edward telling him I would be two seconds, then put my phone, purse, gum, mascara, lip-gloss and pocket mirror in my pale gold clutch.

I grabbed my blue and white stripy rucksack that held all my overnight bits and pieces and rushed downstairs as fast as I could in my heels.

"Wow, Bella, you look really pretty."

I smiled at Seth and kissed his cheek as I passed him at the bottom of the stairs, heading for the front door.

"You'll be okay 'til Charlie and Sue get back?"

"I'll be fine."

"Okay. Remember to call me if you think Charlie's getting suspicious or anything or if he tries to call Rose. I've told her I've used her as cover, though she doesn't know why, she didn't ask, I didn't think she would because we're still in the stages of getting over our argument so she was pretty compliant, so if Charlie calls her then I should be good, her parents have gone away for the weekend so she's the only one home to pick up the phone-"

"Bella, breathe!"

I sucked in a much needed breath. "Sorry," I gasped, "I'm just…"

"Nervous?"

"Yeah." Fuck knows why.

Seth chuckled, "You've gone out before, right?" He blushed when he realised that there could be an answer to his question that he probably really didn't want to hear.

I nodded.

"You like him?"

I laughed, it sounded slightly hysterical, I nodded fervently.

"He cares about you." This was more of a statement. He knew Edward cared about me. He heard it straight from the horse's mouth.

I nodded.

"Then what's there to be nervous about? Go have fun."

I smiled, gave Seth another kiss on the cheek for his little pep talk and let myself out.

"See you." Seth called.

I gave him a small and slightly breathless, "See you later." Before I shut the door behind me.

I looked up as I made my way down the drive and saw Edward, leaning against his sleek, black, Vanquish looking as sexy as his car, with his hands in his pockets. But sexy was putting it lightly. Not only was he sexy, but in his smart grey suit, crisp white shirt and wine red tie he looked exquisitely handsome. His hair – though still going with the slightly natural bed-head style – was looking tidier and much more slick having been tamed with gel.

When he looked up at the sound of the front door closing his green sparkling eyes widened and he smiled when he saw me, looking me up and down, his grin reaching for ear to ear. He stood upright and took his hands from his pockets.

My answering smile was a full blown beam and when he took my face ever so gently in his hands and murmured, "Bella, you're gorgeous," all my nerves melted away into nothing as he pressed his warm, soft mouth to mine.

I hummed into the tender kiss. "Are you sure the dress is okay, I don't know where we're going, is it too much, too little, is it too short, I know it only comes to a little above my knees but-"

He stopped me with another kiss.

"The dress is beautiful. As are you." He pressed a small kiss to my forehead as one hand stroked down my bare arms while the other glossed over my hair, careful to not disrupt the curls. "Let me take this, for you." He took my rucksack and threw it into the small boot before coming back to me and taking my hand.

"Give me a twirl." He grinned. He spun me round before bringing my body back close to his, resting his forehead on mine. "Definitely beautiful."

I rolled my eyes and looked down, trying to hide my fucking blush. "You're not so bad yourself." I mumbled.

He chuckled and kissed my warm cheek, "Thank you, sweetheart." He lead me to the passenger side and opened the door for me. I slid myself and he winked as he shut the door and made his way round to the driver's side.

He took my hand in his after we pulled away.

"Where are we going?" I burst out.

Edward laughed, "Patience, Bella."

"I have very little patience. I've been working off my energy today with Seth and it still hasn't worked and I'm still dying to know."

"Well forty-five minutes isn't going to kill you."

"Forty-five minutes?"

"Yep."

"Where are we going, Las Vegas?"

"No," he chuckled, "Port Angeles, I'm afraid."

"Oh really?" My interest was piqued. I had been to Port Angeles many a time, maybe I could work out where we were going.

"You wouldn't have heard of it, it's pretty new."

"Oh," I grumbled.

"Don't worry, you'll like it…I hope." Edward cleared his throat.

I smiled a little, "Are you nervous?"

"No," he said far too quickly. I quirked an eyebrow. "Okay, maybe a little."

"I was, too."

"Really?" I nodded. "Why?"

I shrugged, "No idea."

Edward chuckled, "Yeah, me neither." He lifted my hand to his lips to kiss. "Have you had a good day?"

I nodded, "Yeah. I slaughtered Seth on the PS3."

"No kidding?" He laughed.

"Oh yeah, I admire his perseverance but the kid sucks."

"Are you sure he wasn't just letting you win?"

My eyebrows rose, "And why would he do something like that?"

"Oh I don't know...because you're a girl?"

I gasped, "I never thought you to be so discriminative, Cullen, I may have lost all respect for you."

"Hey, don't take it personally, guys have gotta stick together."

I shook my head in mock disappointment, "You men are all the same."

"No way, Swan. I'm better than all of them."

"Oh?"

He nodded, "You'll see."

"Well you have tonight to prove it to me."

"I plan to, baby." He winked.

I rolled my eyes but couldn't help but laugh.

The drive didn't seem to take forty-five minutes, it didn't seem to take five, Edward kept me laughing all the way. The man could really make me laugh. But there were moments when he was serious and sweet and god I loved those moments, too. Though we had the nerves of two fifteen year olds out on a first date it felt like we'd been doing this for years, I felt like I had been with him forever. I didn't know how to be without him, and despite my efforts not to be scared, I was terrified of being without him or if we were ever to end this. But I wasn't dwelling on that right now. Sure, we needed to talk about the whole incident and I was sure it would happen, at least part of it, tonight, but not right now.

Right now Edward was helping me out of the car while handing his keys to a valet attendant.

"Wow, you're trusting someone else with your car?" I smirked.

Edward grinned, "He won't be getting a tip if he crashes her, that's for sure."

I was about to respond but I was shocked into silence when Edward placed a warm, comforting hand on the small of my back and lead me into the entrance of the fanciest restaurant I had ever seen in my entire life. Chandeliers hung from the ornamental ceiling and people dressed in expensive suits and dresses sat at circular tables. There was an area for dancing and a couple of steps up sat a man behind a black baby grand piano.

"Welcome to Dawn, do you have a reservation?"

I looked to see a woman dressed in a nice black dress that was apparently uniform, I glanced a little further in to see the waiters in bow ties!

"Yes, under the name Cullen." Edward said smoothly.

The woman checked her book behind the little alter thing and nodded, "Ah, yes, here we are, Cullen. I'll take you to your table. Right this way, sir."

We followed the woman to a table fairly close to the dance floor and the piano playing man and she asked, "Is this table okay, sir?"

"Yes, thank you very much." Edward pulled my seat out for me and I bit my lip to keep from smiling. What a fucking gentleman. It made my chest fill with warmth.

"Would you like some drinks? A bottle of wine, perhaps?"

Edward rattled off some name of some fancy wine from the menu.

"Perfect choice, I'll be right back with that, sir."

When the woman glided off I noticed Edward watching me as I watched everything happening around me.

"Edward this place is amazing."

He seemed to relax a little, "I'm glad you like it."

"I've never been to a place like this before, hell, even Charlie and Sue's wedding was nothing like this." I slapped one of my hands over my mouth. Crap. Cursing in such a place was completely inappropriate. I glanced around me a little to made sure no one had heard.

Edward chuckled.

"How can you-" I stopped myself. Masen&Sons, of course. "Forget it. _That's_ how you can afford this place. I take it they aren't gonna ID me here?"

"No," Edward smiled, "not if you're with me."

A waiter came to our table fairly quickly and showed Edward the bottle of wine. Edward nodded his approval and the man poured us each a glass before putting it in the ice bucket and leaving us to look over the menu. I watched the whole exchange in awe. This was crazy. I had never seen Edward like this before. It was fascinating.

"I think I'm gonna go for the lobster."

"The lobster does look-" I froze. "Edward," I murmured as I looked over all the food and all the prices. "This place is crazy expensive."

"Bella," he placed a hand over mine, "it's fine. Trust me. Don't look at the prices, order whatever you want."

"But-"

"Please, baby," he kissed my hand, "I want you to order whatever you want."

When the waiter came back over I was eyeing the salmon. It was still expensive but much cheaper than the lobster. I glanced up at Edward to see him watching me as though daring me. It was clear he knew what I really wanted. I rolled my eyes at him.

"I'll have the lobster, please." I handed the waiter my menu.

"Wonderful choice, ma'am."

"Hmm," Edward said when the waiter left. "He didn't tell me my choice was wonderful."

I shrugged, taking a sip of the wine – it was fucking delicious. "I hate to break it to you, Edward, but, I think it's because I'm prettier than you."

Edward shook his head in disappointment, "Damn, and I was really keeping my eye open for a hot guy tonight."

Edward said this a little too loudly and attracted some odd looks from the surrounding tables. I covered my mouth and tried to hide my laughter at Edward's fucking blush!

"You're blushing," I laughed.

"Am not." He grumbled back.

I was still giggling to myself as I looked around at all the other people. They all looked very well-to-do and I imagined they all owned cars like Edward's – though perhaps theirs weren't gifts.

"Your car has a sexual identity?"

Edward looked at me strangely due to my random question.

"You called it a _her_ earlier."

"Oh," he chuckled, "of course."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because she means more to me than anything." He smirked, clearly trying to goad me.

I arched an eyebrow, "Is that so?"

"Mmhmm, she's my baby." He smiled, remembering, as did I, that I had said my camera was my baby on our first date. Fuck. I had no idea that was still so painful. I frowned.

"Fuck, Bella," Edward breathed, he reached his hand across the table again, taking my hand in his. "I'm sorry, sweetheart."

I gave a small smile but tightened my hold on his hand as I played with his thumb, "It's fine, don't worry about it."

He frowned, "How_ is_ everything at home?"

I gave a shrug, "Same old, same old."

This didn't appease him at all, "God, Bella, I don't think I've ever been so angry." My eyes widened as he ran his free hand through his hair, shaking his head, the fury in his eyes was clear. "When you told me what Sue did I- fuck I wanted to kill her for doing that to you, for hurting you like that…" his frown deepened and there was now pain in his eyes. "I hurt you like that." He shook his head. "I hurt you worse than that."

Fuck, looked like we were going for the heavy topics sooner rather than later. "No, Edward, that was completely different."

He shook his head again, "I still hurt you."

"Edward, what you did you did it for me." I held his hand tightly in both and mine, my thumb rubbing soothing circles into the palm of his hand.

"I did," he murmured, "but that doesn't make it right."

I didn't know how to stop him from feeling so guilty. The only thing I could think to do was to talk it over with him. So that's what I did. "Explain it to me."

"Explain what?" Edward asked.

"Everything. Why did you tell me to go to homecoming with Riley?"

Edward sighed, "I overheard your conversation in the cafeteria," I nodded, "and he said some things that I really didn't like. All the stuff about you never hanging around with your friends anymore, how he thought you always seemed upset and just…" He rubbed his hand over his face before taking a sip of wine, "I never noticed. But when he said that, god, Bella, I felt sick. I was doing that to you. I was taking you away from your friends. You had all that shit to deal with at home then you came to school and had to sneak around.

"I told you to go with Riley because I wanted you to be a teenager again. I told you before that you look like twice your age with the weight of the world on your shoulders."

I nodded, "You said that's why you kissed my nose, because it made my eyes sparkle."

Edward nodded with a sad smile, "I was adding to it. I was adding to the weight and I couldn't bear to be that guy, the guy that made you unhappy for his own selfish reasons. So when I saw you laughing with your friends at homecoming, I realised that's what I wanted for you. I wanted you to be happy and laughing, always."

"What selfish reasons?" I murmured.

"I wanted you to stay, I wanted to stay with you so I could be happy."

I shook my head, "That's not selfish. Everyone wants to be happy, Edward, everyone deserves to be happy. You deserve to be with someone who makes you happy, especially after the childhood you've had, what with your parents never being there for you."

He gave a non-committal shrug.

"Do you want to know why I was happy that night?"

Edward nodded.

"It wasn't because I was with my friends, or because I had made up with Rosalie and it definitely wasn't because of Riley. I was happy because you were there, because I was there and I was doing something for _us_. I was doing something that contributed to us as a couple, to help our relationship."

"I never wanted you to go to homecoming with Riley because I was worried about people getting suspicious – well, I mean I was, but I never wanted you to go with him because of that, I never would have really asked you to I just, I didn't know how else to get you to go and have fun without…"

"Without letting on what you were about to do?"

"I…I want to say that I didn't plan on leaving and I didn't, not really. I didn't want to leave, after that phone call it was just sort of a fleeting thought but I guess it sort of stayed with me. And when I saw you so happy…you looked so beautiful…I wanted you like that forever, so I decided to leave." He frowned.

"The text?" I questioned.

Edward swallowed thickly, "I couldn't…I couldn't leave without_ something, _but I couldn't bring myself to say goodbye, not only because I couldn't do it in the middle of homecoming but because I couldn't stand to see your face when I told you – I was a fucking coward. And I wanted you to know that." His eyes met mine and they were so full passion I couldn't bring myself to look away even if I wanted to. "I was desperate that you knew, despite all this shit you had going on at home and your whole past, I needed you to know that, I wanted you to believe it. Inside and out, Bella, you are beautiful."

I blinked furiously, willing the tears back. But a single tear escaped, a single tear for his words, for his absolute insistence that I was beautiful, for the pain we both felt because of his leaving, for the reasoning behind it, it was all represented in a single tear.

Edward continued, "And I don't know anyone, Bella, anyone, who deserves to be happy more than you." I stared at him. "That's why I left."

Slowly I stood up and Edward looked so fucking scared and I realised he thought I was going to leave. Fuck no. I made my way to him and bent down, took his face in my hands, brushing my fingers through his hair as I pressed my mouth to his. His hands covered mine.

And, god, the kiss. It was soft, it was firm, it was raw, it was tender, it was passionate, it was comforting, it was everything. It was everything I wanted to convey to him and he to me.

I went back for another and another until I pulled away a little and his hands stroked down my arms. But I didn't remove my hands from his face. I looked him straight in the eyes.

"You need to forgive yourself." I breathed, "I forgive you, you know that, and I'll say that every day we're together if I have to, but I can't make you forgive yourself. That ones on you."

He brushed the tear from my cheek with his thumb and nodded. And the little crease between his brows disappeared and a little bit of the pain left his eyes for good. I knew then that he was beginning to forgive himself, and I swore then and there that I wouldn't leave this world until I no longer saw any pain clouding his beautiful eyes.

He smiled. It was small but it was real and made me smile in return.

I hard the pianist finish his piece and begin another and as Clair de lune began to play I took Edward's hand in mind.

"Will you dance with me?"

"Of course," he murmured.

He stood and led the way to the dance floor, bringing my body close and tight to his, his right arm wrapped around my waist, the other holding my hand in his.

"I love this one," I breathed.

"You know Debussy?"

I nodded, "My mother used to play classical stuff, my sister hated it but I always liked it, especially this one."

I felt him kiss the top of my head from where it rested on his chest. I looked up at him, "Can you play this on the piano?"

Edward smiled down at me and nodded.

"Will you show me sometime?"

He smirked like he knew something I didn't. "Sure. Sometime."

I rested my head back to his chest as we swayed and twirled gently around the floor. The song soon ended and Edward murmured, "I think our food is ready." He kept his arm around my waist as he lead me back to our table, pulling the chair out for me again, kissing my temple as I sat down before he sat in his own seat.

"Have you ever had lobster before?" He asked with a grin.

"Never like this," I said, eyeing the big red bug on my plate, it looked delicious. "I've had bits of the meat before but never like this."

Edward's grin widened, "This is the best way to eat a lobster."

He showed me step by step how to crack open the beast and I was doing perfectly fine and was proud of myself…and then came the claws.

"Then you're gonna want to get the nutcracker…" Edward was instructing me, "and use it on this part here, and…crack, like that."

I slipped the nutcracker around the claw.

"Just don't do it too-"

And crunched. One half of the claw flopped back down onto my plate, the other half landed with a clink, between the plates of a couple on a nearby table. They jumped, startled, stared at the half a red lobster claw on their table and turned to us.

Fuck.

"Shit- crap! Sorry! Oh my go-sh I'm so, so sorry about that!" I gasped, "First timer here!" I tried to make a joke out of it but neither the blonde, straight-faced woman nor the balding man found the situation particularly amusing.

I turned back to Edward on the other hand, who had a fist over his mouth as he tried not to howl with laughter, I covered my face and laughed into my hands as the couple turned back to their dinner.

"Fuck!" I half whispered, half mouthed to Edward who was too busy snorting into his fist to say anything. Not that he would have been able to, anyway because he was laughing so hard.

Those around us were giving us sour looks of disapproval but neither of us could do anything to stop us from laughing until what felt a whole thirty minutes later when our lobsters had been devoured.

"Do you want desert?" Edward asked through his chuckles.

I grinned, "I don't think I could handle desert right now, I'm stuffed."

"Yeah, we don't want to be flinging tiramisu all over the place now, do we?"

"Shut up," I laughed.

The reminder only started him off again, he shook his head, "Your face!"

I rolled my eye before turning my face away from him and watching the people dancing sit down as the pianist went for what I assumed was a break.

"I'm gonna go to the restroom before I get the check." Edward said. I nodded and he squeezed my hand kissed the top of my head as he passed. "I'll be right back."

Music started to play again and I frowned, looking round, surely the guy wouldn't be back that early.

I was right.

It wasn't the pianist.

It was Edward.

I stared as people got up to dance as Edward played the most beautiful piece of music I'd ever heard. It was light and sweet and filled me with hope as it became ever so slightly heavier. I watched Edward as he focussed on the keys in front of him, his face full of concentration yet it seemed to come from him so effortlessly and when the piece tinkled to the end he lifted to gaze to meet mine. He smiled softly, adoringly and it was only then I realised I was crying.

The things this man did to me. God, the things he did _for_ me, the restaurant, the dancing, the music. Playing the piano, showing me another little piece of him.

It was perfect. All of it. He was perfect.

He stood from the piano, ignoring the pianist who had come back recently and gave him a sort of what-the-hell look, and headed straight for me. My arms went around his neck and he all but lifted me from the floor as he planted a kiss on my lips.

"That was beautiful," I sniffled.

Edward smiled, brushing my hair from my face.

"You inspired that one."

I stared. "You…you wrote that?"

He nodded.

"I…me? I was inspiration for the most beautiful piece of music I've ever heard in my entire life?"

Edward chuckled softly but nodded. My arms tightened around his neck and my face was soon buried there as well.

"Thank you," I breathed, more tears leaking from my eyes.

"Thank you," was his response, "for being my inspiration." He kissed me again before asking, "Ready to go?"

I grinned, "Yeah."

He kissed my temple and left some money on the table, enough to cover our dinner and probably more, took my hand and headed outside.

The valet guy was talking to Edward when I spotted something down the road.

"You ready to go, sir?" The valet asked Edward.

I answered for him, "No, we're not, we'll be back in a little while." Then I grabbed Edward's hand and pulled him down the road.

"Bella, where are we going?"

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course," he said, lacing his fingers through mine. We slowed to a stroll.

"Was that you?"

He chuckled a little bit, "Was what me?"

"All of that, back there, with the fancy restaurant and expensive food and the picking the wine?" My tone was light and wondering, because I knew the answer, I knew it when I first cursed in there and he grinned and I knew it when he tried to smother his laughter at my flying lobster.

"Honestly?"

"Yeah."

"I, uhh…" he seemed a little sheepish, "I didn't _mind_ it."

"That wasn't the question." I murmured, urging him gently to answer me properly. When he didn't say anything I stopped walking and turned to face him. He did the same. "Who're you trying to impress?" I breathed.

"You," he murmured back.

I smiled, placing my hands on his chest and leaning into him, he wrapped his arms around my waist. "Don't get me wrong, it was wonderful and man, you're sexy in this suit and tie," he grinned, "but I'm not someone you need to impress. Your parents may have needed wine tasting and waiters in bow ties and salmon that costs no less than sixty dollars. But what I need," I took his face in my hands and stood on tiptoes, "is right here." I pressed my mouth to his.

I had to tell him. I had to tell him that this was not something I expected from him. I needed him to know that yeah he fucked up but he didn't need to wine and dine me in some fancy restaurant to make up for it. I just needed him. I liked Edward Cullen. I didn't know Edward Masen. And though I knew he was still in Cullen mode tonight, I didn't need the money and the big to-do that came with being Masen. I needed him to know I cared about him as he was. Nothing more, nothing less.

I could feel him smiling against my lips, "I hear you, Swan," he chuckled, "but why did you have to bring me all the way down the street to tell me that?"

I laughed and pulled away, "Because I wanted to do something that is so, totally _us_."

"And what would that be?" He smirked, enjoying my playfulness.

I grabbed his hand and pulled him into a small, enclosed space and drew the curtain shut behind us.

He laughed loudly as he sat himself down on the stool and pulled me onto his lap. "Really?"

I nodded, "Yep. We're gonna smile, and pull ridiculous faces, and kiss each other like every other cheesy pathetic couple on the planet because, let's face it, without your cheese we wouldn't be here today."

"I knew it!" He grinned triumphantly, "I knew you couldn't resist my cheese."

So we kissed and we pulled faces and we smiled and I pulled off his tie and he kissed my cheek.

We each got a copy and as we were walking back to the restaurant I pulled off my killer heels that were killing me. Edward took off his suit jacket and put it on me because I was cold. With his arm around my shoulders and mine wrapped around his waist, we strolled down the empty street. I was in a jacket that reached my thighs, the sleeves were too long and my feet were bare, Edward was without his jacket and his tie was hung loosely around his neck.

It was just us. It was just Edward and Bella.

And it was perfect.

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**Did you like it? Outfits and whatnot can be found on my blogger and also the song that I imagined Edward to play in the restaurant on the piano - of course its not his :P**

**Review!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello, I know this chapter hasn't been as quick as my most previous updates but its a fairly long one so...forgive me? Here is the second half of Edward and Bella's date.**

**FYI: Lemons, lemons, lemons...and some Hangover ll spoilers. **

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Chapter Thirteen

The car slowed to a stop in the drive, in front of a garage, of a quaint little house. I turned from looking out the window to smile at Edward.

"This is where you live?"

He nodded, suddenly seeming a little nervous. I couldn't help grinning in response whilst trying to contain my chuckle. He was fucking adorable.

I was about the let myself out when Edward launched out of his door and rushed to open mine. Again, adorable.

"Thank you," I murmured as he took my hand to help me out.

"You're welcome," he breathed.

Edward popped the trunk and grabbed my rucksack before, hand in hand he led me to the green front door and opened it. He indicated for me to enter first. I stepped onto hard wooden floor boards and leant down to place my shoes gently on the floor while gazing at the hallway, taking in everything I could – the small square coffee-like-table to the right of me in corner by the front door, piled with newspapers, letters, pens, a bowl full of change in which Edward threw his keys. I noticed the few pairs of shoes underneath and the calendar hung on the cream wall above the table, today's date circled a crazy amount of times in red pen.

Edward caught me looking and I smirked as he ducked his head, scratching the back of his neck. The stairs were directly in front of the coffee table. To my left was a door and ahead of me was another. I was dying to explore.

I glanced at Edward in question, hoping he would let me look around. He nodded the affirmative with a small smile.

Then he took my hand, and after toeing off his shoes and kicking them under the table, he lead me in the direction of the door ahead. I found myself in Edward's kitchen. The walls of this room were also a neutral cream colour, the wooden cupboards could have used a lick of paint and his shelves were a little bare. Through a window in front of the sink along the back wall I could just make out a small garden past our reflections. I could see Edward watching me. I paid him no mind as I ran my hand along the counter of the breakfast bar and the mismatched stools that made the place homier. I felt him follow me as I passed through the door on my left, which lead to the living room.

Sliding doors were along the back wall of the house leading to the garden on my right. A fireplace and photographs on the mantle made me smile, opposite was a couch with puffy cushions, a coffee table – a proper one – was in between the two and in the corner along the front wall of the house was a flat screen television, not too big, but a decent size. In the corner opposite was a very large bookcase and desk upon which sat an open MacBook, a small lamp, papers – no doubt some kids' pop quizzes and homework – and a bunch of red pens.

I made my way through the door that lead back out to the hallway. I glanced over my shoulder to see Edward still following as I began my walk up the stairs, my hand grazing along the banister.

At the top of the stairs was a closed door and I glanced at Edward in question.

"Spare room." He murmured.

I nodded but instead of entering I turned to face the door at the end of the hall. I passed the bathroom – I'd investigate that later – I was eager to see what Edward's room looked like.

If I had thought the bookcase downstairs was large, it was nothing compared to the amount of books in Edward's bedroom. There was a whole wall made up of shelves for all his books and CDs and a few bits and pieces. The colour scheme was simple, creams and whites and beiges. And the bed was huge.

Edward watched me as I walked around his room, scanning through the titles of his books and music. "It's not just classical music you like, then?"

He arched an eyebrow, wondering what I was referring to.

"A lot of your books are classics too."

He shrugged, "What can I say, I'm an English teacher."

As he was speaking I came across a CD, the case blank. "What's this?" I asked.

"Oh, that's uh…that's something I made for Carlisle and Esme for their anniversary one year."

I frowned, "And you didn't give it to them?"

Edward shook his head and gave a small chuckle, "Chickened out."

"How come?"

"Don't know, really. Guess I got embarrassed."

"Why, what's on it?"

"Pieces of music I wrote."

I noticed the complex looking sound system opposite the bed against the wall of shelves. "Can I listen to it?"

Edward nodded slowly, putting my rucksack down on the floor before coming over to take the CD from my hands and place it into the CD drive.

The sound of a piano filled the room with music that nearly brought tears to my eyes again.

"Is this you playing?" I breathed as Edward took me into his arms and gently swayed us.

"Mmhmm," he murmured.

"It's beautiful, Edward, really."

"Thank you," he kissed the top of my head before resting his cheek there, his hands running soothingly over my body, my back, my shoulders and it was suddenly stirring things inside of me that made me want him. Desperately. We hadn't been together like that for weeks and I could feel all the pent up desire and emotion building inside of me, heating my body, the air around us. And from the way Edward's arms tightened around me I could tell he felt it too.

I pressed a kiss to his chest before looking up at him, my chin resting on the spot I had just kissed.

"I'm gonna change into something more comfortable," I said quietly.

Edward smiled and nodded, leaning down to catch my lips in a tender kiss that told me more was to come. "Use my bathroom," he indicated his head to a door I hadn't noticed earlier that no doubt led to an en suite.

"Okay." I stepped away and slipped my arms out of his suit jacket before tossing it to him. I grabbed my bag and headed for the bathroom, closing the door behind me.

***FT***

Fuck, I was nervous. Why was I nervous? This was Edward. I knew Edward. I l-… fuck. I swallowed shaking my head as if that would shake away the nerves. I glanced at myself in the mirror, fluffing my already fluffed hair, straightening the pink silk top and grey silk shorts. The set was something I had bought specially – they were hardly red lace, trapdoors and corsets but they were classy, like the rest of the night had been. Fuck I wanted to…I don't know…impress him?

I took a deep breath before tiptoeing over the cool tiles of the bathroom floor to open the door. Edward was lounging on the bed, his back against the headboard flicking through a book that he wasn't really reading. The soothing tinkling on the piano still sounded throughout the room and calmed me a little as did the soft glow of the lamp on the bedside table. Edward was wearing nothing but black briefs, his bare chest and abs, broad shoulders and muscular arms and v of his hips made my stomach flip and would have made my panties damp...had I been wearing any.

He looked up when he heard the door open and his book snapped shut, falling onto the nightstand with a soft thump. Edward's eyes widened as he took me in. He licked his lips.

I blushed and ducked my head a little, my hair partially covering my face. Edward cleared his throat. There was a crease between his brows as he stood and slowly made his way towards me. One of his hands ran fingers lightly up and down my bare arm while the other brushed the hair away from my face and tilted my head up by my chin.

"Who're you trying to impress?" He used my own words against me.

I threw his back at him. "You."

"Don't get me wrong, you look…" he shook his head, trying to find words, "absolutely incredible, gorgeous, sexy, stunning," Edward pressed kisses over my face between each word before he pulled back a little to look me in the eye, "but I'm not someone you need to impress." He smiled softly, pulling my body close to his, my hands resting on his chest while his moved up to cup my face gently. "All I need is right here."

His mouth met mine and I hummed into the kiss, deepening it before grumbling between caresses of our lips, "Get your own line."

Edward chuckled as his hands slipped down to encircle my waist, turning us slowly and guiding me backwards towards the bed, all the while careful not to break our kisses that were becoming more and more passionate.

When the backs of my knees hit the bed I lowered myself down as Edward gently pushed me backwards running his hands up my body as he did. My own hands clutched at his soft hair as his open mouthed kisses moved to my neck, my shoulders, my collarbone until his mouth covered my silk hidden nipple, sucking.

I gasped, my hips lifting to rub against the hardness in his boxers. He groaned at the friction he received making me whimper in turn at the blessed vibrations the sound sent running through my body.

His lips moved to the other and I sighed in heaven as he gradually moved lower and lower reaching the top of my shorts, his hands kneading my ass. I could feel his warm breath over my damp and covered pussy, the silk sticking between my legs. I  
wriggled a little in encouragement, my fingers tightening in his hair when he moved back up, not even offering me the slightest pressure my centre was aching for.

"Edward," I whimpered with a frown of frustration.

"Shhh," he mumbled against for the hollow beneath my ear before my eyes rolled back as he grazed my lobe with his teeth, "I'm enjoying myself."

"You're teasing me," I gasped breathlessly.

"I'm worshipping you," he nibbled along my jaw as his hands ran up under my top, his fingertips sending electric pulses through my body as they traced up my sides and tummy, my muscles quivering in anticipation. "Let me. Please." He ran wet, arousing kisses along every piece of skin as he lifted my top, exposing more of my body to him. Edward sucked in a breath as I did when my hardened nipples felt the heated air between us brush over them, free from the light satin that had weighed them down, denied them of his touch, of his hands, of his mouth.

"So beautiful," he murmured, so quietly I wondered if he even meant for me to hear him, "…no idea…perfect…missed you…need to taste…"

"Oh god." His mouth sucked on one, licked and kissed. The sensations I had felt before were nothing compared to this, nothing compared to the direct contact he gave me now.

Edward moved to the other willing and waiting nipple but was sure to keep the other satisfied, tweaking and tugging and pulling and rubbing at my breast, slick and wet much like my pussy was, aching for him.

I writhed against his erection as I tugged my top over my head before my hands tugged at my own hair both in incredible pleasure and tormenting frustration.

"Please," I whimpered as I bucked against him, the sound of his wet tongue and lips sending waves of arousal straight to my desperate core.

I moaned as he finally let go, looking up at me, the pure desire and need in lust filled gazed had me wriggling against him again. "What do you want, baby?"

"You. Please." So fucking coherent.

"Where?" His lips were moving back down my tummy, his tongue tickling my navel, his nose running back and forth from hip to hip.

"Lower." I gasped. Fucker knew I was sensitive there.

"Oh," he scooted down until he was able to kiss the arch behind my knee. "Here?"

Shit. Who knew I was sensitive _there_? "No," I whined.

Edward's tongue danced a trail up the inside of my leg and along my inner thigh before he moved back down only to press kisses along the path he has just created. He stopped at the edge of my shorts, kissing along the line of material, never moving further up to where I needed him.

Fine. If he wanted to tease I was going to show him how to do it properly.

I lifted my hips and hooked my thumbs under the waistband of the shorts, sliding them off and down my legs, kicking them off my feet. I heard them land but couldn't see where and I didn't really care. Edward was now kneeling between my parted legs, staring at my aching centre. His green eyes, hazy with lust, widened as he watched my hand comb my hair through my fingers, pass over my breast, tweaking my nipple as it went, sliding down my tummy to come to rest over my pussy.

He swallowed thickly and I saw his dick twitch in his briefs.

"I'll just have to take care of myself," I murmured, my voice breathy and husky. I slicked my fingers with the wetness at my core before bringing them ever so slightly higher to rub at the aching, eager and denied clit. I gasped, more for Edward's benefit than anything else.

Yeah, how's that medicine tasting now? I thought.

"Fuck, Edward," I moaned, my eyes closing, "feels so good. Ohh, god, so wet." I bit my lip as I rocked against my hand, exhaling a genuine sigh of relief at having gained some much needed friction.

I felt one of Edward's hands come to rest on my knee and when I opened my eyes, I was shocked to see to Edward's emerald orbs had darkened as they devoured the sight in front of him, his heated and suddenly desperate gaze so full of a deep need I had never seen in him before.

I ceased my movements, though it killed me to do so, as I gazed at the man in front of me, looking so desperate and raw. Fuck me if it wasn't a huge turn on.

But when my fingers stopped moving his eyes shot to mine, "Bella," his voice was thick with desire, "don't stop, please, don't stop."

"Edward?"

"Please, baby," he moved my hand back to my pussy with the one that wasn't resting on my knee. "Please touch yourself. Please, Bella. Fuck."

I began to rub at my pussy again, biting my bottom lip to both keep in my moan and hide my smile. It looked like I had just found one of Edward's major turn on's. I watched as his own hand moved to rub at the straining erection in his boxers and this time I couldn't hold in my moan. I couldn't take my eyes off him and it seemed he couldn't look away if he wanted to.

I was quickly getting closer and closer to the edge but I knew I was never gonna be able to get over it unless it was Edward taking me there. Only he could get me to where I needed to go and that was quickly becoming the truth with other aspects of our relationship, not just the sex.

"Edward," I reached for him with the hand that had previously been squeezing my breast, "I need you. Please."

I'd had enough of teasing and playing games. I wanted him. We hadn't been together in weeks and I fucking needed him. From the look in his eyes as they met mine I'd have said that he needed me too.

He took my hand in his, settling himself properly between my legs as I used my feet to push his boxers off his hips. His mouth met mine and between frantic kisses I gasped, "No more teasing. Please. I need this. I need you."

"Me too, baby." He groaned as his hard cock rested against my wet lips. "Fuck, no more teasing." He shook his head before buring his face in my neck, kissing, biting, licking and nipping.

I let one of my hands reach down and graze along his hard on as he rocked against my core. He groaned at the feeling, hissing through his clenched teeth as he lifted his head to rest his forehead against my own.

"Mmm, baby you ready?"

"Are you kidding?" I half growled, half laughed.

He grinned and I could feel him smiling into the kiss as he slid inside of me. I gasped at the sensation that was better than anything I had ever felt in my entire life.

"Fuck," he hissed as he began to rock his hips, pulling almost all the way out before thrusting back in, hitting that spot every time he rolled his hips against mine. My hand grabbed at his fucking beautiful ass, holding him to me tighter and I couldn't help the other as it ran up and down his chest, scratching my nails tantalisingly over his pecs and abs. He cried out when I let the tips of my fingers graze against his cock again as he slid in and out of me.

"Bella," he panted, "Fuck, I've missed you, baby. So much." His lips captured mine in a furious kiss before he had to pull away, both of us gasping for breath. Sweat beaded his forehead and his brow furrowed slightly in pleasure and it was the sexiest sight my eyes had ever beheld.

"You have no idea," I gasped, lifting my hips to meet his.

"Shit," he growled, lifting his torso and grasping the headboard with one hand for leverage and support while the other caressed my cheek so softly, his gaze so tender compared to the passionate and desperate thrusts that rocked our bodies.

"Ugh!" I gasped at the new angle as he filled me completely.

His eyes moved over my body, my chest heaving with the rapid breaths I took, my breasts that rose and fell with each gasp, the emotions and expressions that took over my features as I focussed on the pleasure and passion between us. Then his eyes fell on my hand that caressed his cock with each stroke he made. He groaned and watched his erection slipping in and out of my centre.

"So hot," I thought I heard him growl.

"You like watching us, baby?" I breathed.

He nodded frantically, his eyes never leaving where we were joined. "Perfect," he grunted. "We're perfect, Bella, you feel so perfect. So right. Fuck."

He leant back down, resting on his forearm above my shoulder and his hand moved from my cheek, down my side to join my own where we were connected. I whimpered as the pad of his thumb, slick with my juices, rubbed circles against my clit.

The coil in my tummy tightened and the edge I had been building towards earlier was getting closer and closer. Edward's thrusts were becoming more frantic and less rhythmic as he, too, came closer to the edge.

"Edward," I cried.

"I know, baby," he groaned, "shit, so close."

My breaths came quicker, I could feel my walls tightening around Edward and I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me, his chest resting against mine. His own arms wrapped around my waist and he kissed me furiously between desperate, much needed gasps of air, trying to get as close to one another as possible as we got urgently nearer to falling off the edge.

"Edward…Edward, Edward…Edward…" his name fell from my lips like a prayer, one of my hands tugged at the hair at the nape of his neck, slightly damp with sweat. Edward kissed along my neck until he could no longer do so due to his pants of exertion and lust.

I was there. We both were. So fucking close. And then we fell.

I cried out his name as I clenched tightly around him pulling his own orgasm from him, needing it as much as I had needed my own.

"Yes!" Edward shouted into my neck, "Fuck, Bella!" His hips thrust and spasmed erratically as he released into me.

He leaned heavily against me as we came down from our high. Shivers of pleasure ran through my entire body as I gasped, and I ran my hands through his hair.

I could hear Edward murmuring into my neck but couldn't make out what he was saying. I heard a glimpse of, "so much…never…you". I chuckled though it sounded slow and exhausted, just like the rest of my body was. It also sounded completely relaxed and totally fucking blissed out.

"What are you saying?" I breathed.

I felt his head lift a little and his lips press a kiss to my temple, "Nothing."

I was too tired to argue. "Mmkay." I closed my eyes, smiling as Edward practically purred as I scratched gently at his head.

I felt him moving around and I frowned when I felt his weight lift off of me. "Where y'goin'?" I slurred, not bothering to open my eyes, I just clung to him.

"I'm crushing you," he murmured.

I shook my head, "No, come back, I liked it."

I heard him chuckle as he moved back, his forehead pressed against the crook of my neck as his cheek rested on my shoulder.

"Bella," he whispered.

"Mmm?"

"That was incredible."

I chuckled tiredly, "I know." I was slowly slipping into the land of unconsciousness. I hardly felt it when he lifted his head and brushed his lips over my cheek.

"You're incredible."

I smiled.

The darkness was coming to take me away and I gratefully fell into it, giving in to my exhaustion.

I didn't hear the whispered words Edward murmured into my ear as he brushed my hair from my face and kissed my cheek before succumbing to the pull of sleep himself.

***FT***

My eyes fluttered open and a gasp left my lips as I felt something wet and warm and so fucking good swipe at my core below the sheets.

I lifted them a little to see Edward, his hands splayed on my thighs, separating them, and his mouth and tongue lapped and sucked on the lips of my pussy.

"E-Edward," I whimpered. My hands went to his hair, clenching the soft strands tightly in my fists. "W-what are you dooooing?!" I moaned as I glanced around in the darkness, willing my eyes to stay open in my pleasure as I searched for a clock. The luminous one on Edward's bedside table informed me as to why it was so dark. "It's three o'clock in the morning." I gasped.

"I know," Edward growled, sending delicious vibrations through my centre. "You've been moaning my name and rubbing your soaking wet pussy against my leg in your sleep for the last twenty minutes."

"Ahh!" I gasped out when his teeth ever so gently grazed my clit. "Oh! Please. Don't stop."

"Never, baby."

"Oh, oh, oh, fuck! Please!" His tongue thrust in and out of me much like his dick had done hours previously, but it couldn't reach that spot that was yearning for pressure and my aching clit was desperate for friction to get me off.

As if hearing my thoughts Edward's lips moved up to suck my clit into his mouth and his fingers entered me to rub right on that spot.

"Fuck!" I cried, my back arching and my toes curling. "Shit, Edward! Close, close, so close."

I held his head right where it was and I couldn't stop my hips from rocking against his mouth and fingers as the coil inside my tummy tightened and tightened and tightened until it sprung free. I screamed his name as the sound of his tongue lapping at the juices only had more flowing.

I loosened my grip on his hair as I relaxed back into the pillows, panting harshly as I came down from my high. Edward finished taking all he could but as he did his nose brushed against my overly sensitive clit and I sucked in a sharp breath.

"Fuck. I'm sorry, baby." He pressed an ever so gentle kiss to my pussy lips and had I not been exhausted after being so thoroughly tongue fucked, I no doubt would have jumped his bones.

"Don't fucking 'pologise." I mumbled as he crawled up my body and pulled me to rest against his chest. "Fuckin' perfect."

Edward chuckled and kissed the top of my head.

"'m gonna rock your fuckin' world," I slurred.

"Is that so?"

"Mmhmm, soon as I wake up."

I felt his chest rumble with another laugh as I rested my ear over his heart. "You're fucking adorable when you're sexually blissed and tired."

I can't believe he had done that. Who else would have gone down on their girlfriend when she was having some sex dream at three o'clock in the morning?

Best boyfriend ever.

Edward's chortle told me that I had said that out loud but I was too tired to care.

***FT***

The next time I woke the sun was shining through the window and, unfortunately, Edward wasn't below to sheets having his way with me.

In fact, he wasn't in bed at all.

I could, however, hear him moving around downstairs. That was good. I needed to pee. I jumped out of bed and tiptoed into his en suite thinking to myself how I really needed to get one of these. Sharing a bathroom with Leah sucked. As if Charlie, well actually _Sue_, would ever let that happen. But I shook the step-monster from my mind with a shake of my head and moved to wash my hands at the sink. I splashed water of my face and quickly brushed my teeth with the toothbrush I grabbed from my rucksack that I had left in here the previous night.

Just thinking about last night brought a smile to my face. The slight red flush to my cheeks, bright eyes and sex hair I spied in the mirror only made me grin wider as I tiptoed back to the bedroom and slid into bed.

Seconds later Edward came into the room carrying a tray and wearing boxers.

I frowned; Edward followed my gaze and rolled his eyes with a grin. "No man in his right mind would ever willingly fry bacon without protection to cover the jewels."

I laughed as he set the tray on my lap and climbed into bed next to me. He had made me breakfast in bed and for some reason I felt like crying. Then I felt like howling in laughter when I saw the bacon.

"Burnt bacon," I chuckled.

Edward grinned sheepishly, though his smile was wide, and like mine, his eyes were sparkling. Not to mention the sex hair looked fucking sexy. "Yeah, I'm not that much of a cook."

"Good to know you suck at something," I leaned over to kiss his cheek. "Thank you."

He turned his head to capture my mouth with his, humming into the kiss. "Mmm, you're welcome. Now eat." He snatched a slice of bacon from the plate for himself.

I opted for the cereal, playing it safe.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Edward asked once we had finished eating and had placed the now empty tray on the bedside table.

"Hmm," I sipped on my glass of orange juice as I stared at him with my eyes narrowed. I put the glass on the nightstand before turning back to him. "Well, for starters you can take off those fucking boxers."

Edward laughed but took my demand seriously. Lucky for him because I then proceeded to straddle his lap and make good on the promise I had mentioned last night – or rather early hours of this morning.

I rocked his fucking world.

***FT***

I yawned, stretching my arms above my head, cracking my neck as I turned to see Edward still asleep beside me, one of his arms wrapped possessively over my tummy, holding me tight to his side. I leaned up on my arm to look over him to see the clock.

It was just past noon.

I leaned over to press a kiss to his slightly roughened jaw, stubble starting to show, before I swung my legs over the side of the bed. I heard Edward grumbling behind me as I pulled on a plaid button down shirt that had been slung over the back of the chair in the corner of the room.

I turned as I yanked on his red and blue stripped boxers that he had been wearing this morning, to see him scooting over to the warmth I had left, pulling my pillow into his arms before settling back down to sleep. I chuckled quietly as the sheet fell down slightly revealing his sweet tattooed ass cheek.

I walked round the bed and pulled the sheet back over him before kissing his shoulder and heading downstairs.

My growling stomach led me to the kitchen and I surveyed the room with my hands on my hips pondering what to make for lunch. After searching Edward's cupboards and fridge I came to the conclusion that he must eat a lot of take out. It was a wonder he had ever managed to find bacon let alone cook it.

Eventually I found some grapes and strawberries in Edward's fridge, along with some bananas and apples in his nearly empty fruit bowl sat on the kitchen side.

Fruit salad sounded pretty good and would have to do for now until I found something more substantial.

I was humming to my own random tune and swaying my hips as I chopped the strawberries when I heard Edward stumbling down the stairs.

I knew the second he entered the kitchen and it had nothing to do with the sound of his bare feet padding against the floor. I felt him.

I smiled when his arms wrapped around my waist and rested his chin on my shoulder after pressing a kiss to my cheek.

"Good afternoon," I grinned.

"Afternoon." His voice was deep and husky and panty dropping when he spoke again. "Do you have any idea how sexy you look wearing my shirt and boxers with fucking sex hair?"

I chuckled as he pushed the evidence of just how sexy he thought I looked into my back. I smiled, turning around to face him. His eyes were dark with lust yet sparkling with joy. His arousal was covered by grey sweats and the sleeves of his open grey hoodie were rolled up to his elbows. He didn't have a shirt on underneath and his zipper was undone so I pressed a kiss of his bare chest.

"Did I get you excited, baby?" I asked softly, palming his hard on through his sweats.

He groaned, biting his bottom lip with a nod.

I ran the fingertips of my other hand over his chest, trailing patterns into his pecs and abs – his muscles quivered under my teasing touch.

"Do you want some help?" I whispered, grazing his earlobe with my teeth.

"Oh god," he gasped as I slipped my hand down to find him wearing nothing underneath.

"Going commando, baby?" I smirked, "Hoping this was going to happen?" I arched my eyebrow and he grinned sheepishly then suddenly grasped the counter behind me to steady himself when I stroked the smooth skin of his cock, once.

He thrust his hips involuntarily and I kissed him, my hand moving rapidly over his throbbing erection.

Edward panted into my mouth, his eyes dark and heavy with lust as he rocked his hips into my hand. His brow was furrowed with a look of pure pleasure of his face, his lips slightly parted as he gasped when I rubbed over the sensitive underside of his head.

"Oh," he moaned, "so good. Fuck." I moved my hand faster, gripping him tighter. "Ugh, Bella."

He gripped the counter more tightly as he hissed through his clenched teeth, his head lolling backwards, eyes closing heavily.

I crouched down to my knees, pulling his sweats down with me, not stopping my hand movements as I leaned forward to lick away the bead of pre-come that had leaked from the tip. His cock twitched as he groaned, the head red and pulsing. Anyone would have thought the man hadn't come in days, he was insatiable. But judging from the aching in my pussy, I was too.

I wrapped my mouth around him and he grunted, his hips bucking once. "Fuck."

Edward's head fell forward and his eyes opened to watch his cock sliding in and out of my mouth. "Oh, shit, baby." Man, Edward really liked to watch.

I took all of him I could reach, fondling his balls as he groaned. When his head reached the back of my throat I swallowed around him and Edward cried out, "Fuck, coming!"

He released and I swallowed, licking him clean before working my way back up his body, pulling his sweats with me. His legs trembled ever so slightly as I pressed a kiss over his softening cock before kissing up his abs to his chest.

He pulled me into his arms when I was standing straight and hugged me to him tightly, kissing along my neck as I wrapped my arms around his.

"Mmm, that felt so good, Bella." Edward kissed my cheek. "Thank you, baby."

I shook my head, "No, thank you for last night. I've never been so pleased to be woken up at three in the morning."

Edward chuckled and pulled back to lean his forehead against mine, still breathing a little heavily. His kissed my nose and laughed when I crinkled it.

He moved his arm to grab something behind me before he pulled back and popped a strawberry into his mouth. "What are you making?" He asked.

"Fruit salad. You have absolutely nothing else in your cupboards."

He ignored the jibe and asked suggestively, "It can wait then?"

"Wait for what?" I arched an eyebrow.

"A shower." I spanked his ass as he turned towards the door. "Ooh, kinky."

I giggled.

"Are you coming?" He stood by the door, spinning to watch me.

"Sure," I gave a half shrug as I passed him, "if you manage last long enough." Then I ran for the stairs squealing as the comment sunk in and he chased after me.

"Oh, I'm gonna get you!"

He already had me. The man fucking owned me. Completely.

I wasn't quite sure when I had come to the realisation that I loved Edward Cullen. I think maybe it was a gradual process. But the point was I knew now, I knew that I fucking loved him. I was just too chicken shit to tell him.

***FT***

"_Sperm? I think your English is a little off. You're talking about _my_ sperm. Where would your sperm come from?"_

"_From my balls."_

"_Hold on, back up._

"_Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait are you-"_

"_Hey, you're in Bangkok sweetie, there's a reason they don't call in Bang-cunt."_

"This is the funniest movie I think I've ever seen." Edward laughed as the woman turned around and turned out to be a lady-boy and Stu fell off his chair.

I was sitting between his legs on the couch, my back leaning against his chest, his arms wrapped around me as The Hangover ll played on the T.V. All I was wearing was his grey hoodie from earlier as it was zipped up and reached my thighs, Edward was wearing his sweats.

"I can't believe you've never seen it." We laughed when Alan said, _"I don't get it, is this a magic show?"._ "How could you possibly own the DVDs and yet have never watched them until now?"

I felt Edward shrug, "Alice bought them for me for my birthday but I just never got around to watching them."

The rest of the afternoon that we hadn't spent having sex in the shower, and in his bedroom, and in the kitchen, we had spent in front of the television, lounging around, relaxed. It was nice.

I had introduced Edward to the wonders of The Hangover and he was enjoying it thoroughly.

"What's your favourite movie?" Edward asked, his fingers trailing up and down my thigh.

"It changes," I murmured, "At the moment it's The Silver Linings Playbook."

"Never seen it. Read the book, though."

I nodded, "Me too. It's good, though the movie's a little different to the book. How about you, what's your favourite movie?"

"At the moment, this one."

I laughed, "I told you you'd like it Mr I-think-its-overrated."

"Alright, alright, enough with the I-told-you-so's. You were right, I was wrong, get over it."

I chuckled, "Never."

We laughed when Stu started crying.

"_I'm sorry but I am so confused."_

"_I made love to a man."_

I swung my legs over the side of the couch and made to get up when Edward pulled me back to him.

"Hey, where d'you think you're going?"

"Err…to the bathroom?"

Edward grumbled but let me go. I laughed, kissing his cheek before standing. He smacked my ass as I passed.

"Hey!" I yelped.

"Payback's a bitch, baby."

I stuck my tongue out at him before leaving the room.

When the movie had finished Edward had to pee so I stood and went over to the fireplace, I had been dying to take a closer look at some of these pictures. The first I came across had me laughing, a tiny Edward was stood next to a little girl with black spiky hair, he was missing his two front teeth and pulling a funny face at the camera. The next picture was another of the girl with black spiky hair but she was stood next to a man with honey coloured waves who had his arm wrapped around her shoulders. There was an older couple in the next frame, a woman with soft caramel waves and warm brown eyes stood next to a blonde haired man with a tender smile – though he wasn't looking at the camera, he was looking at the woman next to him. He was clearly in love with the woman. I had never seen anything like it. Then a much older man - I assumed Edward's grandfather - was sitting next to Edward, they were looking at something the camera couldn't see and were laughing.

The final picture had me frowning as I took it in my hands to get a closer look. It seemed fairly recent, Edward was smiling at the camera and the pixie haired girl was kissing his cheek. I wanted to slap her upside of stupid Tinkerbelle head.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

I jumped, startled when Edward wrapped his arms around me from behind.

"You scared me!" I gasped.

"Sorry," he kissed my cheek. "I see you found my pictures."

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, I should commend you for your hiding place by the way, it was a real struggle to find them sitting in broad daylight on top of your fireplace. Almost gave up."

He laughed, swaying us side to side. "That's Alice," he said, looking down at the picture in my hands.

Oh. I relaxed into his arms. Alice. His cousin slash practically sister. Well, I felt stupid. "It's cute." I said lightly, putting the frame back on the mantle.

"Are they Carlisle and Esme, then?" I pointed to the picture of the in love couple.

I felt Edward nod, "Mmhmm."

"I've never seen anyone look at another person that way," I murmured.

Edward's arms tightened around me and he kissed my temple.

"Who's that?" I asked, indicating to the blonde guy next to Alice.

"That's Jasper, her fiancé."

"How long have they been together?"

"Since high school."

"No way!"

"Yep. Alice pranced up to him first day of freshman, he was a senior - same year as me - and said "I'm gonna marry you, one day" and he's been following her around like a love sick puppy ever since."

I laughed, "Cute. How did Carlisle and Esme meet?"

Edward chuckled, "Carlisle was actually on a date with my mother when he and Esme met."

"What?" I gasped, spinning around to face him.

Edward smiled at my eager face, fucking desperate for him to finish the story. "You hungry?" He asked, teasing.

"Edward," I slapped his arm playfully.

He chortled and took my hand in his, leading us back to the couch and taking up our previous positions. "Carlisle's mom and my grandmother were friends and had set them up. My grandmother was the first of my grandfather's three wives and he divorced her shortly after this whole fiasco, mainly because of the way she treated Esme after it had all happened."

I frowned, seemed like Esme and I had something in common.

"So my mom and Carlisle went on this date, Carlisle wasn't too eager but mom was all for it apparently. My grandmother was a social climber and what with Carlisle training to be a surgeon and the connections his own parents had, she and my mother thought the match to be perfect. Carlisle said the entire date was a disaster from start to finish and by the end of the night he just wanted to be rid of her." Edward chuckled obviously having taken no hard feelings on his mother's behalf.

"He walked my mom to the door and ended up being dragged inside by my grandmother. When my grandmother started asking when he was gonna make an honest woman out of my mom he started making his escape plan." I laughed along with Edward. "He just wanted to get the hell out of there. When my mother and grandmother went off to the kitchen to get some drinks he was about to leave when Esme walked in. Carlisle told me it was love at first sight." Edward traced his fingers up and down my arm as he paused.

"Do you believe in that?" I wondered. I leaned my head back against his chest as I twisted to look up at him.

"I didn't used to." Edward murmured vaguely. "Anyway. Despite how inappropriate it was Carlisle said he couldn't leave without asking her out."

"What did Esme say?"

"She said no."

"What?!"

Edward chuckled, "She told Carlisle she thought he was a pig, she couldn't believe anyone would ask to go on a date with the sister of the date that had brought him home to meet the parents."

I laughed, "Well, when you put it like that."

Edward nodded with a grin, "That's what Carlisle said. But that didn't stop him from trying again. He broke the whole thing off with my mother, telling her that he didn't think it was going to work out – she was furious of course and demanded a reason why, so Carlisle told her there was someone else. He then proceeded to try and woo Esme."

"You did _not_ just say woo." I laughed.

Edward rolled his eyes but laughed with me, "Honestly, it fits their personalities. You'd understand if you met them. They act like they've been around since the 1900s and had to court each other with chaperones or something."

I waved my hand in dismissal, "Sure. Continue."

Edward tickled my side and a squirmed before he carried on with the story. "And eventually, after days and weeks of torment and begging and complete loss of all dignity, Esme finally said yes to a date."

"How did he get her to agree?"

"She hit him with her car."

"What?!" I fucking shrieked.

Edward nodded, laughing, "He jumped in front of it on purpose to be fair, but she didn't know that at the time."

"Oh my god," I laughed.

"They went on a date and they've been together ever since. But, in the beginning Esme asked to keep it a secret, she didn't want to upset my mom. But it all came out in the end. My mother had a tantrum, went crying to my grandmother who then punished Esme. Apparently my grandmother was horrible to her. Esme ended up dropping out of college and moving in with Carlisle because things got to bad."

I frowned, "That's terrible."

Edward hugged me tight. "Everything turned out, okay. My grandfather divorced my grandmother who died about ten years later."

"Lovely."

Edward chuckled. "Carlisle and Esme are still as crazy in love as ever."

"That's really sweet." I murmured. "They really sound amazing."

"They are…" Edward sounded nervous. I frowned and looked up at him. "That's err…that's why um…"

"That's why what?"

Edward looked a more than a little worried now. I frowned and sat up straighter, turning to face him.

"Don't be mad," he said.

"Why would I be mad?"

He took a deep breath before saying, "I told them about us."

I stared.

Edward watched me, his eyes flickering over my face, looking for signs that I was about to explode in fury and storm out of the house.

"What?" I breathed.

"I…I told them about…about us." He swallowed thickly. "They won't tell anyone, I promise you, Bella. I just…I needed to talk to someone, you know? And they've kinda been through what we're going through…sort of. Well, they had to hide their relationship anyway. But I give you my word, they won't say anything to anybody, not even Alice. Alice doesn't have a fucking clue. No one does. Apart from them. And they would never say anything to anyone, they would never-"

I placed my hand over his mouth. His eyes were wide and wary.

"Shhh." I said. "It's okay. I'm not mad."

I lowered my hand and looked down as I fiddled with Edward's sweats.

"But…?" Edward asked softly.

"Do they…do they hate me?" I practically whispered.

"What?" Edward gasped, taking my face in his hands and lifting my head so our eyes were level. "Bella, why on earth would they hate you?"

"Because I'm an eighteen year old high school student who could potentially destroy their sons career."

Edward gaped before pulling me closer and shaking his head, "Bella, you are so much more than just some high school student to me. And they could see that when I told them about you. Bella, they know how much I…I care about you. I'll admit they're a little worried but they don't hate you." Edward laughed softly, "Bella, Esme is desperate to meet you."

"She is?" I asked quietly.

Edward nodded, "They both are but Esme more so. She wants to meet the young woman I'm- who's completely changed my life…in a good way."

I chuckled, "Some English teacher you are. Oh so eloquent."

Edward smiled and brought my lips to his. "And technically they could never hate you for destroying their sons career."

"Oh really? And why is that?" I arched an eyebrow.

"I'm not actually their son."

I rolled my eyes, "Potato, potahto." I snuggled against his chest, my front pressed to his and his hands roamed my back and played with my hair. "They're more your parents than your biological ones." I muttered with a grumble, feeling oddly protective.

Edward kissed the top of my head as he held me close.

We savoured the moment, snuggled in companionable silence until Edward asked…

"So, d'you wanna meet them?"

Fuck.

* * *

**I know not a lot happened in this chapter but I felt it was needed and hey, Bella finally admitted how she really feels about Edward...well to herself at least. And we got a little glimpse of Carlisle and Esme. **

**All clothes - or rather sleepwear can be found on my blogger. **

**Review!**


	14. Chapter 14

**So here is chapter fourteen. It's been a little while since the last update - I've been busy. But I'm planning not to post chapters until the chapter that follows has been written. This may not make updates any more consistent but hopefully they'll be quicker. :)**

* * *

Chapter Fourteen

The rest of October and the beginning of November passed by in a blur. A fast but blissful blur. Edward and I were going fucking strong. We rarely snuck around at school now – that was an agreement we had come to, based on the fact that neither us felt like getting caught anytime soon.

So instead of the hour we previously spent together at lunch time, I would spend my evenings at his house, not mention the weekends when Edward wasn't visiting Carlisle and Esme.

I still had yet to meet the couple that had practically raised my boyfriend from infancy, but the day was drawing closer and closer and my insides squirmed whenever I thought about it.

Surprisingly, I found that it wasn't the idea that things were getting serious between Edward and I that worried me. I mean, he was my teacher for crying out loud, I could get into a world full of trouble and he could lose his entire career if the wrong people found out about our relationship. Honestly, how much more serious could you get?

No, it wasn't the commitment that came with the whole "meet the parents" thing that had me nervous. It was meeting the people that Edward looked up to, meeting the people who had raised him, the people he may as well call mom and dad. Carlisle and Esme were people who Edward cared for deeply and loved and I was fucking terrified they wouldn't like me.

I desperately wanted them to like me – more so, I believed than any other girlfriend ever to meet their boyfriend's parents. Because these people, this amazing, in love, perfect couple were the people Edward had_ chosen_ to be his parents. How many people in the world could ever say they had picked the people who raised them?

Edward had chosen Carlisle and Esme and, though not legally, he had taken their name by choice - they meant that much to him.

And fuck me if I hadn't planned to run, screaming, to the fiery pits of hell if they decided they didn't like me.

Fuck, what if they didn't? Shit. I knew I was nervous – scratch that – I knew I was shitting bricks about whether they would like me or not…but what if they really didn't?

Would Edward and I have to spend weekends apart while he visited his family in the future? Would we have to spend Christmases and birthdays and Thanksgivings separated because his parents didn't like me and they wanted to see their son?

I was too fucking scared, contemplating the next horror that came to me, that I didn't even realise I had _wanted_ to spend my future Christmases and birthdays and Thanksgivings with Edward. I was too busy shitting myself that I didn't realise I had been _planning_ and _expecting_ to spend such occasions with Edward.

Fuck. What if Edward left me because Carlisle and Esme didn't like me? Would he do that? No. No Edward wouldn't do that. Would he?

I mean, sure Edward cared about me, I knew that…but he _loved_ them. He had known them his entire life and had _chosen_ them.

Yeah, sure, he had chosen me too, but if it came down to a choice between me and his parents, what would he do then?

"Bella, you okay?"

I looked up, startled from my inner turmoil. "Huh?"

Edward frowned, "You stuck?"

I stared, "What?"

"Are you stuck with your biology? You've been staring at the same spot on the page for the last ten minutes."

"Oh." I frowned, looking back down to the book in my lap to see that I was even on the same page I had been half an hour ago. "I guess I just zoned out for a minute."

"Or ten." Edward chuckled.

I was still reeling from the horrifying questions racing around through my mind so all I could manage to give him was a weak smile.

Edward placed the essays he had been marking down on the coffee table in front of him before he turned to watch me work as he fiddled with strands of my hair that were falling loose from my ponytail.

He did that a lot – watched me work. Or rather he just stared at me and played with my hair, brushing the back of his knuckles across my cheek occasionally, sometimes leaning in to press a kiss to my temple.

At first it had been distracting to say the least but now I was sorta used to it.

I sighed closing my textbook and throwing it onto the coffee table beside Edward's marked essays. The unfortunate person at the top of the pile was clearly going to be disappointed with the big red circled "F".

I couldn't concentrate, and it had nothing to do with the way Edward was now nibbling on my jaw – he did that sometimes, too.

"All done?" Edward asked.

"Not even close," I muttered, "but I have four more days to finish it and I just can't concentrate right now." We had broken up from school yesterday as it was Thanksgiving tomorrow so I had ages until Banner was demanding my homework from me.

I leaned back, snuggling into the back of Edward's comfy couch as he ran his fingers through my hair. It felt so good.

"So, you're coming here first thing tomorrow then we'll head over to Carlisle and Esme's to spend the morning there…"

Edward hashed out our plans for tomorrow while I swallowed thickly, hoping I wouldn't vomit due to my fucking nerves.

"…then I'll drive you back here so you can grab your truck, head home to spend some time with Seth and Charlie and have dinner and stuff-" I noticed how he left Sue and Leah out of that equation, he wasn't their biggest fan. "-and then you can drive to mine when you're done and spend to night here. Sound good?"

I nodded, trying to show enthusiasm but my smile definitely came out more as a grimace that time.

Edward frowned, "Alright, what's the matter?"

I shook my head hoping I was able to convince him I was fine. "Nothing." I gave him a toothy grin.

Edward stared wide eyed. "Okay, you're either lying – and terribly, might I add – or you're practicing for your movie audition for the next Saw movie as the puppet thing because that was fucking terrifying."

I pursed my lips with a scowl as the back of my hand slapped at Edward's shoulder half heartedly. "Very funny." I rolled my eyes.

Edward chuckled before moving closer to me, his hand running up and down my thigh soothingly as I sat with my legs crossed indian style. He leaned his head on his other hand, his arm resting on the back of the couch. He kissed my cheek. "Baby, what's the matter?" He asked softly, seriously.

I sighed, biting my lip as I played with his fingers. "I just…what if they hate me?"

"Bella, we've talked about this, sweetheart," Edward's tone was softer than I had ever heard him use with me before. "They don't hate you. I told you they really want to meet-"

"I know they don't hate me now, but what if they don't like me after I do meet them?"

Edward shook his head, leaning in to press another kiss to the side of my head, "That's not possible, Bella."

"But it is," I frowned, "it's very possible that your family, no forget that, the people you have _chosen_ to be your family – because that's ten times worse – could absolutely hate my fucking guts." I was getting angry now. This was fucking ridiculous. Edward and I had worked so fucking hard to get where we were now, it hadn't been easy and it hadn't been fucking painless, and I just hated the fact that everything we had could all be ripped out from underneath us tomorrow morning.

It wasn't until Edward pulled me onto his lap and encircled me in the protection of his arms that I realised I was shaking.

"Baby, calm down, it's okay," he soothed, rubbing my back, stroking my hair, kissing my temple. "It's okay, take deep breaths, it's okay."

My face was buried in the crook of his neck and my hands grasped at his bare shoulders, trying to hold him to me, trying to get impossible closer. Fuck, tears were welling in my eyes. I inhaled deeply as Edward asked, taking in his scent, but the air escaped in shuddering breaths.

I swallowed thickly as Edward pulled me back a little, taking my face in his hands, a crease between his brows, his eyes filled with concern. They widened when they saw my unshed tears.

"Bella," he breathed. I could see how fucking confused he was, how worried he was at seeing me like this for no apparent reason whatsoever, or a reason that seemed so incredibly insignificant to him.

"I can't…" I bit my lip to keep it from fucking trembling. My head shook back and forth as my hands ran over his face, hair, shoulders, desperate to keep him with me. "I can't lose you." It came out as a broken whisper.

Edward pulled my forehead down to his, his eyes burning with sincerity yet complete bewilderment. "You won't lose me, Bella. Never. I'm not going anywhere," he stroked my hair back. "Why would you lose me?"

"I- if you have to choose."

"Choose? Choose what?" I buried my face in his chest, attempting to hide my tears. Edward was really worried now, becoming frantic as he tried to figure out what had me so worked up. "Talk to me, baby, please, I don't understand."

"If you have to choose between me and your parents."

His arms tightened around me and held me close to his body. "Oh, Bella," he breathed, stroking my hair as I silently cried. I couldn't fucking stop. "Why didn't you tell me you were so worried about this?" He kissed the top of my head when I sniffled before pulling me backwards a little so he could look into my eyes.

"Listen to me, baby." Edward murmured, his green orbs burning into mine. "I promise you, it will never come to that. I know you haven't had the best experiences when it comes to parental figures but do you really think I would ever feel the way I do about Carlisle and Esme if they weren't good people?"

I tried to brush the tears from my face and Edward helped, swiping them away gently with his thumbs.

"It would never happen in a million years but I'll admit, you're right, there is the tiniest, smallest most insignificant chance that they won't like you. But, Bella, even if that happened – and I promise you, it won't – they would never ask me to choose between you and them. They know how much I…how much I care about you, and they would never ask me to do something like that, and they would never treat you badly." Edward pressed a kiss to my forehead. "If I ever thought that anyone in my family would ever treat you horribly I'd never let them come close to you."

I leaned into him, wrapping my arms around his neck, my forehead still pressed to his.

"Esme's been through what you're going through," Edward's voice was soft and quiet when he spoke again. "You should have seen the look on her face when I mentioned you were having a rough time at home." He smiled a little before he laughed through his nose, "Bella, if anyone in my family ever treated you any less than how you deserve to be treated, it wouldn't be me they'd have to deal with…they'd have to get through Esme, and trust me, she'd have them running six feet under, climbing willingly into their own fucking coffin!"

I couldn't help the watery that spread across my face and Edward's smile in response was beaming.

"And that would be nothing compared to what she would do to them if they attempted to take me from you. Both she and Carlisle have seen how happy you've made me and they'd be fearing for their lives if they did anything to sabotage that."

I chuckled a little and Edward smiled pressing his lips to mine, wiping the remaining tears from my face. "You won't lose me. Trust me."

"I do." I breathed.

I sniffled, running my hands through his hair.

"You should have told me you were so worried about it, I had no idea."

"That's because I didn't want you to have an idea."

He scowled at me playfully before his eyes turned serious, "Promise me you won't hide something like that from me, again?"

I bit my lips with a frown. Fuck. "I…I can't."

"Why not?" He asked patiently.

"Because…that thing…that…" I shuddered.

Edward shook his head quickly, "Excluding that." He kissed the bridge of my nose between my eyes. "You don't have to talk about that until you're ready."

I kissed his chin and made my way up to his lips, planting one on his mouth. "Then I promise."

"Thank you," Edward breathed, "I'll promise you the same in return."

I heaved a sigh, "Well now that's all out the way…I'm hungry."

Edward chuckled, "What would you like?"

I wriggled my hips against his from where I was straddled on his lap. "You."

Edward tackled me to the floor and proceeded to completely and utterly and totally sate my hunger.

***FT***

"Where are you going?" Charlie asked as I picked up my bag from the hallway just as I was about the leave the house.

"To Rosalie's. I need to give her back her sweater." I said.

"Do you really need to do that now? Can't you give it to her when you go back to school? It's Thanksgiving."

"I know dad, but she needs the sweater for tonight. Her grandmother bought it for her and will apparently "slaughter" Rose if she's not wearing it when they go to visit her later. Her words not mine."

Charlie grumbled, "Fine, but you better be back in time for dinner. You're already spending the night at Angela's I don't want you spending the whole day with Rosalie as well."

"I'll be quick, dad, I promise, just a few hours. I'll be back in time for turkey." I kissed his cheek before he stumbled into the living room, muttering about how he wasn't able to spend Thanksgiving with one daughter while the other was off gallivanting with friends.

I frowned but shook it off as I threw my burgundy bag into the truck and hopping into the driver's side.

I wrung my hands before firing the engine. I knew not to be absolutely terrified, I trusted Edward and everything he had told me yesterday, but that didn't mean I wasn't nervous.

Edward opened his door when I knocked, he had low rise jeans on, showing off the delectable v of his hips and was shirtless.

His grin was huge as he let me in, humming into the kiss with which he had captured my lips as he closed the front door.

"You look beautiful," he smiled, "Let me just get a shirt and we can go."

I swiped my hand down his chest and abs needing a feel before he hid them away, pressing a kiss to his sternum. He laughed at my antics before running up the stairs taking two at a time. "I'll be just a sec," he called.

I made to sit down on the couch in the living room but the mirror above the fireplace caught my eye and I couldn't help checking myself over for the millionth time that morning.

I tweaked the grey beanie on my head hoping the partially natural, partially artificial curls wouldn't be destroyed by hat hair. I ran a finger under my eyes, brushing away the non-existent smudges left by the light usage of mascara and eyeliner. I had a faint dusting of smoky eye shadow to bring out the lighter caramel and coffee shades in my eyes. My lips were a soft rose pink and my cheeks naturally blushing.

I bit my lip as I surveyed what I was wearing. The fitted tan jacket, the same colour as the suede high-heeled boots that reached just above my knee, hid the red knitted and loose fitted sweater that matched the colour of my nails and handbag. I turned so my back was facing the mirror and I stood on tiptoes, turning my head to look over my shoulder so I could check that I didn't have any loose strands of hair or lint over the backs of my dark blue skinny jeans.

"Admiring the view?"

I looked round to see Edward leaning against the doorframe, his arms folded, with a smirk on his face.

"Shut up," I grumbled, glancing back at the mirror for a final quick check. "Do I look okay?" I asked, turning back to Edward.

"Okay? You're ass in those jeans, Bella, fuck me!"

"Edward," I whined, "I'm serious."

"So am I."

I "tskd" and huffed, facing the mirror whilst crossing my arms.

Edward came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder as we stared at the couple in the mirror.

"We look good together," he murmured.

I nodded, there was no denying it.

"And you look gorgeous." He kissed my cheek.

"Are you sure? It's not too casual? Should I be wearing a dress or at least a skirt? I- mmmph!" Edward silenced me with a kiss.

"You're perfect as you are, I promise. Thanksgiving with the Cullen's is very relaxed and casual."

I sucked in a deep breath, "Okay."

"Although, you might want to change one thing?"

"What?" I asked nervously, glancing over myself in the mirror again.

"You could take off all your clothes and get into bed with me. We can ditch Carlisle and Esme. I'm sure they'd understand."

I rolled my eyes before grabbing his hand and pulling him to the door, "Come on, Mr McHorny, we gotta go."

Edward laughed loudly before saying, "I thought you were nervous."

"Shut up," I groused which only had him laughing louder.

"Hey, d'you mind if I leave my bag here, saves me carrying it everywhere."

"Sure," he took it from me and placed it by the coffee table that wasn't a coffee table in the hallway before leading me outside to his Vanquish.

"Can we at least have sex in my car?" He asked as he turned the ignition.

I shook my head with a laugh as I pulled on my Ray Bans, despite the chill it was pretty sunny.

Edward gaped at me.

"What?" I asked.

"We _have_ to have sex with you wearing just those sunglasses and your boots."

I cried with laughter the whole way to Esme and Carlisle's house while Edward whinged, "I'm being serious stop laughing!" But I sobered up completely when we pulled into their drive. They lived in the middle of nowhere in a house that I would bet Edward's car on, was the biggest house in Forks.

And it was fucking beautiful.

Edward opened my door and I could hear the tinkling of a stream nearby.

"They, uh…they're loaded, then, right?"

Edward chuckled, "They're comfortable."

"Right."

I swallowed as I pulled off my sunglasses and shoved them in my pocket.

"Hey," Edward turned me by my shoulders to face him and had to grasp my chin in his hand to pull my eyes away from the house and to him. "They're gonna love you, I promise."

I nodded as he placed his hand on the small of my back and led me to the front door.

Before he even had the chance to knock it was swung open to reveal the woman in the picture on the mantle of Edward's fireplace. Her caramel locks were pulled into a sophisticated up do, but strands were falling out. She wore a blue apron with a red warning sign that said "Complaints to the cook could be hazardous to your health." Her sleeves were rolled up and her hands were covered with flour yet she didn't hesitate to grab Edward and pull him into a hug.

"Hi Esme," he chuckled, kissing her cheek.

"It's good to see you, sweetie."

Edward laughed pulling back from her embrace and wrapped his arm around my waist, "I saw you the other day."

"Doesn't matter, it's been too long." Her eyes fell on me and huge smile took over her face her eyes lighting up. "You must be, Bella. Come here, sweetheart," before I could even blink she had her arms wrapped around me, hugging me tight as she had done with Edward. "I'm so happy to meet you!"

Edward followed us into the house and closed the door while Esme led us through the very open and bright living room to the kitchen, chattering all the way.

"Honestly, I can't believe Edward's waited so long to introduce us, I've been dying to meet you ever since he told Carlisle and myself that you and he were dating."

"Uh, that may have been my fault," I said, glancing at Edward as he leaned against the counter of the island in the middle of the kitchen, folding his arms and watching us with a bemused smile on his face.

"Why's that, dear?" Esme asked sweetly.

"Well, I was a little nervous about meeting you. Edward's told me such amazing things about you…"

"She was worried you wouldn't like her." Edward piped in. I glared at him for revealing my secret. He just winked.

Esme looked appalled. "What on earth has Edward told you that would make you think such a thing?"

"Hey! I didn't say anything!" Edward said, affronted.

Esme narrowed her eyes suspiciously, "Mmhmm, I'm sure." She said skeptically.

Edward rolled his eyes playfully before he picked up a stray slice of carrot and began munching.

Esme lightly smacked his hand, "No picking, you'll spoil your dinner."

I bit my lip, trying to hide my smile at her chiding.

"Where's Carlisle?" Edward asked.

"On the phone to Alice, she and Jasper are visiting his parents. He'll be down in a minute." Esme began pottering around the kitchen, cooking bits and pieces. "Edward, why haven't you taken Bella's jacket for her? She must be awfully warm, it's boiling in this house, the heating has been up and down all week. I keep telling Carlisle to ring for a man to come in but-"

"Real men don't ring for men to come and fix things in their house."

I turned to see who I assumed was Carlisle, entering the kitchen. He headed straight for Esme, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind as she rolled pastry, much like Edward had done to me earlier, and kissed her cheek before grabbing two beers from the fridge and passing one to Edward.

"How are you?" He asked, as they shared a one armed hug, patting each other's backs.

"Good, yourself?"

"Not bad, at all." Carlisle turned to me with a warm smile, "And this beautiful young lady must be Bella."

I blushed as took my hand and kissed the back of it.

"Alright old man, stop trying to charm her, you got your own." Edward came to wrap his arms around my waist.

"I'm pleased to meet you, Mr Cullen." I smiled at the blonde man.

"Carlisle, please," he said with a wink.

"The pair of you, stop it, leave the poor girl alone. Why don't you make yourselves useful and fetch Bella and I a glass of wine from the bar."

Edward took my jacket for me before kissed the side of my head and leaving the kitchen.

The second they were gone Esme enveloped me in another hug.

"Thank you," she breathed.

I frowned as she pulled back, "What for?"

"For making Edward happy." She sat down on one of the stools next the island and patted the one next to her for me to sit down. "You know about my sister, don't you? His parents?"

I pursed my lips, not wanting to say anything horrible about Esme's sister whist I tried to keep the anger from showing on my face. I nodded.

"Yes, I can see that you do." She watched me carefully with a nod of understanding. Looked like hiding it didn't work.

"I'm sorry," I said, "it's just this topic, Edward's parents," I shook my head, "it makes me a little angry."

Esme smiled, laughing a little, "Don't apologise. My sister's a bitch." Stared wide eyed and Esme chuckled, "Excuse my French."

I grinned, I had a feeling I was going to like this woman.

"We helped Edward all we could. He was always welcome in our home and he always will be, Carlisle and I love him like our own. He was always a fairly happy child, he took everything in his stride, but there's always been this…" she searched for the right word, "…sadness about him. It's always been there, this sad acceptance that he's used to distance himself from people. Even when he was small it was there, it was like he just accepted the way his parents treated him. But ever since he's met you…it's gone." Esme beamed. "He's truly happy, it's like he's finally realised that the way my sister and her husband acted was wrong, and I think you're to thank for that."

I was amazed by what she was telling me, to hear what life was like for Edward from somebody else. But I couldn't take credit. I shook my head, "I really don't think it has much to do with me-"

"No, dear, honestly." She placed one of her hands over mine and squeezed gently. "I think Edward's seen what it's been like for you. He told me you don't get along well with your step-mother?" There was sympathy in her eyes and compassion. She knew, she had been there. Maybe that's why I felt like I could talk to her.

"We don't get along, no. I can't say a get along well with my mother, either." I swallowed thickly. "Something, uh…something happened a few years back and she blamed me for it. We haven't spoken much since. She's sent me birthday cards and she calls me sometimes but…" I trailed off.

Esme nodded slowly. She swiped a single tear from my cheek with the back of fingers. "I'm sorry, sweetheart," she murmured, pulling me into a hug.

"But this is it," she said after I pulled back, "this is why you are to thank for Edward's happiness. He's seen what it's like for you, how much it has hurt you and it made him angry. You've made him realise. He knows the way you've been treated isn't right, and he's realised it wasn't right when it was happening to him."

Esme played with my curls gently, stroking my hair as I soaked in what she was saying and relished in the touch of a mother. I hadn't felt it in years.

Edward and Carlisle came back in with our drinks a few minutes later and Edward beamed at me, passing me the glass and kissing the tip of my nose.

"You okay?" He murmured as Carlisle and Esme laughed at something.

I nodded with an easy smile, stretching up to kiss him, "I'm perfect."

Carlisle interrupted our moment. "Here, Bella, I got something you might find interesting."

He passed me what seemed to be a photograph and when I looked down and saw the picture I couldn't help the giggle that escaped my lips.

"What is it?" Edward asked, peering down at the picture in my hands. He gaped before glaring at Carlisle. "Think that's funny?" He asked.

"Edward, it's my job to embarrass you." Carlisle laughed.

Edward shrugged like it didn't matter before rushing out of the kitchen calling, "How about I get the wedding album out to show Bella?"

Carlisle's eyes widened in horror as he rushed out after him.

Esme laughed, rolling her eyes as she came to sit beside me again, glancing down at the picture.

"That was Edward's first Thanksgiving with us without his parents."

I nodded as I stared down at what seemed to be a five year old Edward, his hair was in two high bunchies at the top of his head, held there by two big pink scrunchies, the leg of a turkey in both of his little hands, trying to bite into it without his two front teeth.

"Alice got hold of him. She always wanted to play dress up with him and the girl was obsessed with his hair. Poor boy." Esme chuckled.

"How old was he here?" I asked.

"Nearly six I think. Why's that?"

"Edward's got a picture of him and Alice on his mantle, his front teeth are missing in that one, too."

Esme laughed, "Those teeth didn't grow for ages, he had a lisp for months."

I laughed. "He's got a picture of you and Carlisle, too," I murmured. "Edward told me about how the two of you got together, Carlisle must have been crazy about you. If the picture is anything to go by he still is."

"It does sound quite romantic doesn't it?" Esme smiled, "At the time I thought I'd broken his neck, the bastard. And by the time I'd realised what he had done I _wanted_ to break his neck."

I laughed hard, wiping a tear from the corner of my eye. When Esme and I had both calmed and taken a few sips of wine I said with a shake of my head, in awe, "I've never seen anyone look at another person the way Carlisle looks at you. You both seem very much in love."

Esme smiled an indulgent smile as she watched me with excitement behind her eyes. "Edward looks at you like that."

My eyes widened but she said no more, pouring some more wine into both our glasses and offering me some of her home-made fudge.

"Don't tell the boys," she whispered conspiringly "they'll both whine like babies."

***FT***

"Oh, Bella, are you sure you can't stay for dinner?" Esme asked as she and Carlisle followed Edward and I to the door, "Are you really going to leave alone with these boys?"

I grinned, "I'm sorry, but I have to get home or the step-monster's gonna kill me. She said this morning that dinner was at one, I can't be late."

Esme scowled and said as seriously as she could – she was a little tipsy – "Bella, you tell me if that bitch gives you a hard time, then she'll see just what Esme Cullen is made of."

I laughed. After a few glasses of wine and a long talk about ways we could piss off said bitch, Esme was hyped for a fight. I gave her a hug, "You're the first one I'll come to." I promised.

Carlisle kissed my cheek in farewell, "Bye, Bella, it was lovely to meet you. Don't be a stranger, okay?"

I smiled, "I won't. Thank you for having me."

"You're welcome any time, Bella. And remember our lunch date!" Esme called as Edward led me to the car.

"It's a plan." I called back. I waved as I hopped into the Vanquish.

Edward grinned as he pulled out of the drive.

I rolled my eyes, "You can say it once and once only and then that's it, never again."

Edward planted a kiss on my cheek before turning back to the road. "I told you so."

***FT***

I let myself into the house with a smile on my face. Why the fuck had I been worried? Esme and Carlisle were great. And man, I loved that woman! She was fucking fantastic. I couldn't wait to see them again.

Unfortunately I wasn't going to be seeing them again today, I wished I was, Esme's cooking smelled amazing. Edward promised to bring me some back for tonight.

I headed to the kitchen and frowned. There were empty plates and dirty dishes all piled on the counter. The table was clear.

I could hear the football on in the living room so went to investigate.

Charlie was sat in his armchair with a frown on his face, Seth was lounging on the floor tapping furiously at his phone but stopped when he saw me in the doorway. He threw me an apologetic look I didn't understand. Leah and Sue looked up from where they were sat on the couch, Leah gave her fucking Satin smirk while Sue glared at me.

"Ah, so she finally decides to show her face." She spat.

Brilliant. What the fuck had I done now?

Charlie looked up when Sue spoke and he was…well he was fuming.

"Where have you been?" He asked.

"I was at Rose's I told you."

"And I told you to be back in time for dinner."

I stared before glancing down at my watch. "I am."

Leah scoffed.

"Bella, we had dinner over an hour ago."

I frowned, "But it's not even one o'clock yet."

"Dinner was at twelve, I told you this." Sue snapped.

"You said one!" I snapped back, angrily.

"You're a nasty little liar, Isabella."

I shuddered, "Don't. Fucking. Call. Me. That." I growled, my hands balling into fists.

"Don't talk to your mother like that." Charlie shouted, standing up.

"She's not my mother!" I yelled back.

"Well you know what I'm thankful for, this year?" Charlie roared, "I'm thankful your mother kicked you out, because I'd hate for her and your sister to witness your pathetic, childish little games."

I recoiled as if he had slapped me. It felt like he had. I swallowed, biting back the sting of tears that threatened to come.

The colour drained from Charlie's face. He stepped forward reaching out to me but I shook my head, stumbling backwards, turning and running out the house. The front door slammed shut with a resounding "bang" behind me.

***FT***

"Bella?"

I looked up from where I was sitting, leaning against Edward's front door, to see him climbing out a Jeep that was now stationary on his driveway.

I stumbled to my feet as Edward reached me. The smile left his face when he saw the tear tracks down my face. He pulled me into a close embrace.

"What happened? Why are you sitting outside? How long have you been here?" He asked frantically.

"Just an hour or so," my voice was hoarse. "I was gonna call you but my phones in my bag and I was gonna drive to Carlisle and Esme's but there was no way I was gonna be able to find it in the middle of nowhere." I gave a weak smile but it did nothing to soothe his worries.

"Your hands are freezing," he frowned as he unlocked the door and pulled me inside. Edward led me to the couch before pulling me down onto his lap, much in the same position as yesterday. "What happened?" He asked stroking my hair.

So I told him. I told him and I ended up crying like a fucking baby all over his chest.

"It's okay," he breathed, holding me tight. Then he growled angrily, "Fuck that, it's not okay. It's not okay at all."

I sighed heavily, pulling away and wiping my eyes. "It _is_ okay," I sniffed, "I'll tell Esme."

Edward tried to hide his smile, he was angry, he didn't want a smile, but he couldn't help it. I giggled as he tried to shake the smile away with a frown but it wasn't working.

I kissed his cheek. "Oh fuck," I muttered.

"What?" Edward asked, looking down at his chest to see what I was frowning at.

"I ruined your sweater." I tried to wipe at the green cashmere V-neck sweater that looked beautiful on him, but the wet spot from my tears wasn't going anywhere.

"It's fine," he chuckled grabbing my hands to stop me.

"No it's not," I muttered, "I like this on you."

"Oh," Edward laughed letting go of my hands. "Well then, sure, by all means."

My laugh was interrupted by a growl from my stomach.

"Shit, you haven't eaten." Edward lifted me from his lap and placed me on the couch beside him before getting up and rushing to the hallway, "I'll be right back."

He came in moments later with a Tupperware box. "Want some of Esme's turkey?"

I nodded enthusiastically, grabbing the box from him and opening it.

"Smells fucking delicious."

"Want a fork, baby?" Edward asked, amused as I picked up a roast potato and stuffed it into my mouth.

"No, 'm fine." I tried to smile but my mouth was too full.

Edward sat down and leaned over to press a kiss to my temple.

I ate all his leftovers.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

Edward shook his head with a grin, "It's fine. Esme will be pleased to hear you enjoyed her cooking."

"How could I not? That was the best Thanksgiving meal I've ever had, and it was cold."

He laughed, "I'll be sure to tell her."

"Or, you know, I could tell her myself. She has my number after all." I chuckled, along with him.

"You know that's it, right? You're now her best friend. She'll be calling you to go shopping, for lunch, for coffee…I told-"

I slapped my hand over his mouth. "And I told you. Once only. You've already said it. You don't get to say it again."

Edward rolled his eyes but as they gazed into mine they became warm and serious, "Can I take you somewhere?" He asked softly as I played with the hand he had used to pull mine away from his mouth.

"Where?" I wondered.

"Well I can't tell you. What sort of surprise would it be if I told you that?"

I grumbled, "Why does it have to be a surprise?"

"Because I said so." He pulled me up from the couch by my hand and led me outside, opening the passenger door of the Jeep.

I frowned as he jumped into his side. "Who's car is this?" I asked.

"Mine."

I stared, "What happened to the Vanquish?"

"It's at Carlisle and Esme's."

"Why? You're not selling it are you?"

Edward laughed at my frown, "No I'm not selling it. I just fancied driving the Jeep."

"You have two cars?"

"Yes."

"How come I've never seen this one before?"

"Because it's always been in the garage while you were round."

"Why was it at Carlisle and Esme's?"

"It needed some work done to it and Esme offered to take in for me while I was working."

"Oh."

I didn't even bother trying to guess where we were going but we weren't in the car for long.

Edward brought me into, what at first, appeared to be a dank little store, but a woman took us round the back where loads of dogs, all shapes and sizes were yapping and wagging their tails behind the doors of their cages.

It was a dog's rescue centre.

He led me over to a pen full of puppies of different breeds. I couldn't help fucking cooing as I leaned down to pet them.

"Wanna go in?" Edward asked.

"Can we?"

He nodded with a grin and carefully opened the gate so they wouldn't all escape as we squeezed in. We crouched down and they all yapped and jumped and licked.

Then the cutest German Shepherd puppy I had ever seen in my life plodded over to me on his too big paws, his tail wagging as he climbed onto my lap.

"Hello, puppy! Well aren't you just the cutest. You look like a teddy bear." I cooed, scratching behind his ears. He had something sticking under his collar. "What you got there?"

I frowned as I pulled out the folded piece of paper that read, _Happy Thanksgiving, Bella._

I looked up to see Edward watching me, petting the puppy in my lap. He gave a half shrug, "You always wanted a dog."

I stared. "What?"

"A German Shepherd, am I right?"

I nodded slowly.

"I know its not exactly a tradition to give presents on Thanksgiving. But I wanted to give you one to show you how fucking thankful I am that you're in my life." Edward reached up with one hand to caress my cheek. "I know you always wanted a dog because to you a dog meant a functional, stable, safe, secure family. It means commitment and responsibility. Well, I want to be that for you, Bella. I'll be whatever you need me to be. Because you mean everything to me and I…" He swallowed thickly watching me carefully before he took a deep breath. "I love you."

My heart was pounding in my chest, the dogs were yapping, the smell of kibble was in the air but all I could see was Edward, all I could hear was him and it was the most romantic fucking moment of my entire life.

"No one's ever said that to me before," I breathed, my voice barely above a whisper, tears welling in my eyes. I launched myself at him, throwing my arms around his neck as I kissed him. "I love you, too," I gasped between kisses. I could feel Edward smiling against my mouth and he leaned back to rest his forehead against mine.

"Say it again," I pleaded, my eyes flickering back and forth between his.

"I love you, Bella."

The tears fell and I grinned from ear to fucking ear. I buried my face in his neck, holding him tightly to me.

"I think you're squishing the puppy."

"Oh!" I gasped and pulled backwards to see the little guy sitting between us, looking up at us, his tongue hanging out. He looked like he was smiling.

"You want him?" Edward asked, grinning.

I nodded, "Yes!"

I picked the puppy up into my arms as I stood nuzzling his head, he was so fucking soft.

Edward opened the gate for me and we carefully made our way out of the pen, making sure it was locked behind us.

"He's gonna have to stay at mine," Edward said as we drove back home, the puppy wriggling in my lap, pulling at the rope toy thing in my hand. "But you're over every day anyway so that doesn't matter."

"What are we gonna call him?" I was still cooing and I couldn't switch it off.

Edward chuckled, "Whatever you want, he's yours." I leaned over to kiss his cheek. "But I object to prissy names. I'm not going out walking that dog and calling out Fluffy or, I don't know, _Muffin_."

I laughed, "As if I would do that to this little guy." I pondered and I played with the yapping puppy. "How about Bear?" I asked.

Edward looked over at him, "He looks like a Bear. Bear's good."

"Bear it is." I looked down at the puppy on my lap, "Do you like it?" He jumped and licked my face.

Edward chortled, "I think that's a yes."

***FT***

"Oh please!" I begged in a whisper.

"No! He needs to learn, if we bring him up here he's gonna think that this is where he can sleep."

"Why can't he?"

"Because I don't want my bed smelling of dog."

The small sad whines reached my ears from downstairs.

"Oh, Edward, he's crying, please!"

Edward sighed, glancing over at the clock and growling at the luminous numbers shining 01:27. "Fine. But only because I wanna sleep."

I grinned, leaning over to kiss his cheek. "Thank you. Love you."

I made to get up but he pulled me back down for a proper kiss, "Love you, too."

I slipped downstairs and into the kitchen where Bear was sat whining pitifully in his crate.

"Hey, puppy," I cooed quietly. I pulled him out of his bed and snuggled him against my chest as I tiptoed back upstairs, climbed into bed and slipped under the covers.

Edward wrapped an arm around my waist and slid me backwards, keeping my back pressed to his chest as we settled down to sleep on our sides.

Bear wriggled around in circle before he settled down in front of me. I scratched his head as I closed my eyes.

"If he pisses in the bed you're cleaning it up." Edward grumbled, kissing my temple.

I giggled.

Thanksgiving never really used to be a holiday I enjoyed, all previous years, at least the most recent, had absolutely sucked. But this year…this year was the best fucking Thanksgiving ever.

Because Edward loved me.

I had something to be thankful for.

* * *

**They've finally said those three little words! **

**How did you like Carlisle and Esme? **

**Clothes and whatnot can be found on my blogger...as can a cute little puppy :D**

**Review!**


	15. Chapter 15

**So...I know I said last time that I wouldn't be posting chapters until the following one has been completed but that has done nothing to speed up the process and I felt bad keeping you all waiting.**

**I'm gonna scrap that idea - but do not fret, the next chapter is halfway completed anyways.**

**Oh and FYI, M for a reason ;)**

* * *

Chapter Fifteen

"Bella, I-"

I sat bolt upright, slamming my book shut and shoved it under the pillow I had been leaning against. I'd been so absorbed in the damn thing that I hadn't heard Edward coming home. He'd been out to fetch some groceries and I hadn't even heard the front door open or the car pull up outside.

My boyfriend was now stood in the doorway of the bedroom, his eyebrow arched his expression torn between curiosity, shock and amusement.

"Hi." I said breathlessly. "Where have you been?" Yeah, way to play it cool, Bella.

"…Okay, what's going on?" Edward asked suspiciously. He had the right to be suspicious. Honestly, "where have you been?" I'd _asked_ him to go to the store because I was fucking starving.

"Nothing." I said way too quickly.

"What were you reading?" He stalked towards the bed.

"Nothing." Shit. "J-just a book."

Edward's eyebrows rose higher.

"Just a book?"

I nodded quickly, "Mmhmm."

"You're an awful liar, Bella." He crawled onto the bed, his eyes smouldering as he prowled closer and closer. My panties – the only thing I was wearing beside a small tank top – were getting wet. Again. Damn him.

"That…" I swallowed thickly, "that wasn't a lie. I _was_ reading a book."

"Oh yeah? What was it called?" He was now above me on his hands and knees, his torso getting closer to mine, forcing me to lie back against the pillow. His eyes flickered back and forth between my own and my mouth. I licked my lips, air escaping me shakily, embarrassingly loudly.

"I…um, it…" Fuck, just jump me already! But before my fried, lust filled brain could even begin to think of a completely innocent title of a book, the one I had been reading was suddenly in Edward's hands. Manipulative bastard.

His eyes widened when he took in the front cover and the title, surprise written all over his features. Whatever he had been expecting it wasn't this. Edward's face morphed from shock to glee before his eyes met mine again, a smirk shaping his lips.

I blushed furiously.

"Bella," his voice was thick with pure glee, "have you been reading erotica?"

I pushed him away from me with a noise of frustration, before sitting upright again, my arms folded, a frown marring my face as I bowed my head angrily, my lips pursed. "It's your fault! You've been fucking teasing me all day and you didn't even know you were doing it and every time I tried to start something you were completely oblivious to my intentions so I had to relieve some fucking stress, okay?!"

Edward was chuckling cheerfully from where he sat on his knees in front of me. I looked up at him with a glare as he laughed harder.

I gaped in realisation. "You knew? You fucking knew what you were doing, didn't you?!"

Edward nodded through his laughter, wiping a tear from his eye.

"You absolute arsehole!" I slapped his arm, which only made him laugh more. "Argh!" I swung my legs over the side of the bed and pushed off, ready to storm out of the room. Edward's arms grabbed me around my waist and pulled me back down, my back against his chest.

"I'm sorry," Edward chuckled, trying to sober himself up.

"You don't sound fucking sorry."

I could feel his grin as he kissed my cheek – I couldn't help melting into him. "I'm not, but I thought I should say it, anyway."

I rolled my eyes and grumbled, "Some apology that was."

"It was just so funny." He moved us backwards so he was leaning against the headboard and I rested against his chest between his legs.

"I didn't find it very funny, do you have any idea how fucking sexually frustrated I am right now?"

Edward hummed against my neck where he was now pressing tender, sensual open-mouthed kisses. Fuck that felt nice.

"If it's any consolation," he murmured, "I'm really fucking horny, too. As much as I was denying you I was denying myself."

"So why the hell did you do it?"

His fingertips began trailing softly up and down my bare arms.

"Imagine how good it's gonna feel when I help you relieve all that pent up frustration and make you come." He purred.

I reached my hand up to grasp his soft, sexy, fuck-me hair and bring his head down to capture his mouth with mine. I hummed into the kiss, loving the feel of his tongue stroking against mine.

"Get the book, baby." Edward said huskily when we broke the kiss.

I frowned, confused, but did as he said. I hopped off the bed to grab the book from where it had fallen to the floor as Edward kicked off his jeans and pulled off his shirt, leaving him in only his boxers, his beautiful chest and abs on display.

He leant back against the headboard again, patting the space between his legs with a grin.

My frown deepened in puzzlement but I complied. Edward wrapped his arms around me and pulled me as tight and close to him as possible, I could feel his cock hardening against me.

His hands moved to my inner thighs, just above my knees, spreading my legs. "Read the book, Bella."

"W-what?"

"Does it turn you on?" He asked softly.

I nodded hesitantly.

"Read it. Out loud."

I swallowed, wondering what the hell was happening, before opening the book and beginning where I had left off.

"_It was wrong. He was her student. He was seven years younger than her. But that didn't stop him from stalking towards her desk, lust smouldering in his eyes…_E-Edward." His fingertips began tracing soft, delicate and teasing patterns into my thighs, his hands getting closer and closer to where I wanted him the most.

"Keep reading." His voice was compelling.

I let out a trembling breath before continuing, "…_nor did it encourage her to push him away when his mouth landed on hers, his tongue swiping across her bottom lip, begging for entrance_."

Edward's breath was hot against my neck. I stumbled over the words and a whine escaped me when his hands moved from my thighs to the bottom of my tank, lifting my top, skipping past my aching centre.

"_She may have been his teacher, but he was in the one in control now as his tongue thrust into her mouth to meet hers, his hands pulling and tugging at her hair. She gave in to him willingly, her pussy already tingling in anticipation of what was to come_."

My top was now pulled over my chest, my breasts exposed. Edward traced patterns against my ribs, his touch barely there, light and teasing. My tummy muscles flinched and quivered as his fingertips ran from hip to hip, just above the waistband of my panties. I silently pleaded for him to touch me. I needed more. But his hands trailed upwards instead of down.

"_He pushed her backwards, trapping her between the wall and his body. She had no way to escape even if she had wanted to. Every line of his body was pressed to hers and she could feel his hardness underneath his jeans, pressing into her stomach. He rubbed his covered dick against her causing a whimper to escape her lips._

_"He may have just been eighteen, but he was all man, that much she could feel. His body hard and strong and powerful, pinning her arms above her head in one hand as the other lifted her shirt and kneaded her bare breast – _Ohh!" I whimpered.

I arched my back as I tried to get more of Edward's touch but he wouldn't allow it, tracing circles over my breasts – with each of his hands – around my nipples but never touching how I needed him to. He was teasing me again, it was frustrating, it was torturous and it felt so fucking good. My nipples were hard and aching, my pussy was wet and pulsing and he had yet to touch either of them.

My voice trembled when he grazed my earlobe with his teeth and I continued to read.

"'_No bra,' he growled at her, 'you're that desperate for me? Been hoping this would happen?'_

_"She nodded breathlessly, whimpering as he kissed down her sternum, between her breasts –" _Edward trailed his fingers between my breasts. "- _he grasped one of her full boobs in his hand_ –" Edward did the same. "- _and sucked her hard, wanting nipple into his mouth making her cr-yyy out!_" I gasped as Edward pinched my nipple, pulling and tugging deliciously, the sensations enhanced due to the teasing.

"Oh!" I breathed before pulling his mouth to mine again, this kiss more heated and passionate than the last taunting one. When we pulled away I was panting, my chest heaving, my toes were curled and my thighs were trembling ever so slightly.

"Want to stop?" Edward asked softly, his hands rubbing my thighs soothingly, the gesture meant to calm rather than to tease. He could see how much this was affecting me and was genuinely asking if it was too much and now needed to just fuck.

As intense and torturous as it was, it felt incredible. I shook my head, "A little longer. Feels good."

Edward nodded with a smile and kissed my forehead before I turned back to the book, the fingers of one of his hands now already playing with my nipples, teasing and tweaking. The other trailing up and down my inner thighs once more.

"_He pulled up her_ – oh fuck, Edward!" His hand on my thigh and moved higher and his fingers were now tracing my around my pussy lips over my panties, so close yet so fucking far. "– _He pulled up her skirt, grasping her hands in each of his above her head and rocked his hips against hers. His jean covered erection grinding against her bare, wet pussy_, _the seam of his jeans knocking against her throbbing clit_."

"Fuck, Bella, this really is turning you on!" Edward was on awe of how fucking soaked my panties were.

"You…no…idea." I gasped, breathlessly, my hips bucking minutely as Edward tapped the tips of his middle and forefinger sporadically against the spot where my clit would be under my panties.

"_He pulled down his jeans, needing to be closer, to feel the slick skin of her soft pussy against his throbbing cock. She moaned in pleasure when she felt the hotness of his hard on, rubbing against her core._

"'_In me!' She gasped, 'P-please, fuck me, need you_.'"

Edward's hand cupped me gently, and so softly I barely felt it. I could hardly feel his hot hand grazing over my pussy as he rubbed against my panties. I whimpered, arching, raising my hips to unsuccessfully press my centre harder against his hand.

"Not yet, baby," he hummed, the sound of his voice causing my panties to impossibly dampen further.

"Please," I whined when he pushed the crotch my panties to the side, I shivered as the sensation of cold air rushed over my throbbing pussy. His finger circled my slick entrance, never dipping inside.

"Come on, what happens next? Keep reading." Edward encouraged.

I sobbed tearlessly as he circled around my clit with his now wet finger, his free arm wrapped around my abdomen so I couldn't buck and wriggle my hips, never directly touching me where I was desperate.

"'_Beg me,' he demanded._

"'_Please,' she cried._

"'_More.'_

"'_Please, please, fuck me, please, I need you, I need it, I'm begging you-' She cut off with a scream as he thrust into her, her pussy tight and wet around him. His cock was hard and throbbing and pounding, filling her completely, hitting that spot inside her body that had her screaming in pleas – _ahhh! Edward!"

He dipped two fingers inside my core, slicking them with my juices before bringing them up to rub over my aching, desperate clit.

"Yes!" I cried. "D-don't stop."

The other hand moved down and he thrust three of his fingers inside me, filling me. They rubbed against the spot that only he had ever been able to reach. The overload of sensations hit me hard after all the teasing and I came, shaking and shivering, my back arching, my toes curling, with a silent cry of his name on my lips – no sound escaped my mouth. My pleasure so intense I couldn't manage to physically voice it.

I slumped backwards against his chest, panting hard, my eyes too heavy to lift open. I felt Edward pressing kisses to the side of my face, over my neck as his arms tightened around me.

"Edward," I breathed, so quietly I could barely hear the whisper.

He turned me around and pulled me down so we both lay on our sides on the bed, facing each other – though I still had my eyes closed.

It was a long while before I was able to open them, but when I did I saw Edward watching me, a smile on his face, though there was a crease between his brows and his eyes were slightly pained.

I reached my hand up to stroke his cheek and he smiled, his eyes closing. I snuggled closer to him and when our bodies pressed together I felt his hips buck, his erection grinding against my leg.

His eyes snapped open and he smiled sheepishly, "Sorry," he cleared his hoarse throat, "seeing you fall apart like that." He shook his head. "Fuck, Bella it was so fucking hot."

I pushed against his shoulder so he was laying back against the bed as I crawled on top of him, my legs straddling his as I rocked my core over the incredibly hard erection in his boxers.

He hissed through his teeth at the contact.

"Let me take care of you," I murmured, leaning down to press my lips to his. He responded eagerly, the kiss quickly becoming heated. Fuck, I had completely forgot. He _had_ been teasing himself as much as he had been teasing me…all day, and he hadn't got off just now. He really was desperate for this.

That meant no teasing or foreplay now. Edward needed this.

I pulled my top over my head and slid my panties off before pulling down Edward's boxers. I took his cock in my hand, red at the head, and I had never felt it so hard. He groaned as I stroked him a couple of times before I lifted up onto my knees, guiding his dick to my entrance before thrusting down.

"Bella!" he cried out.

I rocked against him, hard and fast like I knew he needed it.

I moved to my hands and knees, bringing Edward's hips with me so we weren't separated. He grunted as he was able to thrust as fast and as hard as he wanted, all the while my breasts bounced in front of his face.

"Fuck, Bella, not gonna last." He panted, his thrusting became more erratic and frantic.

"Let go baby, come for me," I breathed.

"Unghh! Fuck, Bella, yes!" He groaned into my mouth when I kissed him as he came, stilling and tensing, his hips flexing as he released.

He collapsed back onto the bed, gasping, as he pulled me on top of him.

We lay together, me resting on his chest with his arms around me. I listened to his heart pounding as we lay in comfortable and companionable, content silence, basking in the glow of our fuck hot amazing sex.

Edward broke it.

"Fuck me."

"Ditto."

***FT***

"How is everything at home?" Edward asked as we sat on the floor in the living room alternating between playing Bullshit with a pack of cards and playing with Bear. We were rolling a tennis ball back and forth between us while the puppy bounded after it, always unable to catch it before it was rolled back towards the other person.

I shrugged one shoulder pulling a face as I laid an Ace and a two of hearts face down. "Two Jack's. Still haven't really spoken to anyone – apart from Seth, of course." It had been two weeks since Thanksgiving and the atmosphere in the Swan household had hit an all time low. "Sue's still a bitch, Leah's still a spiteful brat and Charlie's still…Charlie."

Things were a strained between Charlie and I, had been since Thanksgiving. But I refused to play the bad guy. I refused to be the one accused for our bad relationship so I was being civil.

I answered when he spoke to me.

That was it.

"Three queens." Edward put down some cards. "You know, Carlisle had to pretty much restrain Esme from driving over to your house when I told them about Thanksgiving."

I rolled my eyes but couldn't help the smile that spread across my face – I fucking loved that woman. I eyed my hand, noticing the only queen I held and decided Edward wasn't cheating. I put down the queen and asked, "What should I get Carlisle and Esme for Christmas?"

Edward looked up from rolling the ball for Bear. "You don't have to get them a present."

"But I want to." I said.

Edward watched me intently before he leaned over to press a kiss to my lips, "I love you," he murmured against them.

I beamed, "I love you."

He gave one more, chaste kiss before pulling away. "I'm not sure. I'm not really the one to ask, I'm awful at thinking of gifts."

I looked pointedly at Bear and Edward chuckled, "He was the most thoughtful gift I've ever given anyone, you should feel privileged."

I grinned before sighing when Edward placed down two Kings.

I offered the other two before he called me on my bullshit.

I frowned, picking up the huge stack of cards between us, "How did you know?"

"I had three kings," he told me.

"Then why didn't you…?" I trailed off realising what he had done. He had fucking cheated. And not in the way you were meant to cheat when playing Bullshit. He had looked at my cards when he kissed me, only put down two of his three kings, knowing I had the other and would most likely bullshit and say I had two. "You scheming bastard!"

Edward laughed loudly, startling Bear who yapped at him before he turned and plodded his way over to my lap.

"You hungry puppy?" I cooed down at him, scratching behind his ears.

"You spoil that dog rotten."

"Shall we get you some food?" I continued to coo, pointedly ignoring Edward, "We won't listen to that meanie over there now, will we? No we won't."

Edward chuckled, following me into the kitchen as I carried Bear, heading to find his food.

"What do you want for Christmas?"

"Oh," I laughed, "Bribery will not get you back in the good books."

"Are you sure?" Edward asked as I placed Bear back on the floor with a bowl of his food. Edward wrapped his arms around me, leaning down to kiss along my jaw.

"Oh, I'm sure. Especially not with sex."

Edward chuckled, pulling back, smiling. But after a while the smile turned into a small frown.

I frowned in response, "What's the matter? I was kidding about being angry with you, you know. I won't _really_ deprive you of sex."

He smiled but it was weak. He closed his eyes as I held his face in both of my hands, bringing his forehead to rest on mine. "I need to tell you something," he breathed.

That didn't sound good, "What is it?" I murmured.

Edward sighed before opening his eyes, "I have to go to Chicago."

I frowned, my arms wrapping around his neck as I pulled myself closer to him. "When?"

His arms tightened around me, "The twenty-third."

I frowned, "When will you be back?" I was dreading the answer.

"The twenty-seventh."

He wouldn't be here for Christmas. Shit. I'd be dealing with my so called family alone. "Well," I said lightly, "I guess that's a good thing. Making excuses for Thanksgiving was one thing but I don't think Charlie would put up with me "gallivanting" all over Forks to meet up with "friends" on Christmas day." My tone was very blasé but my fists had clenched around his shirt tightly, as though that would keep him here.

Edward was watching me carefully, worry in his eyes. I cleared my throat, "How come you have to go?"

"My parents want me there for Christmas," he rolled his eyes, "but that's just an excuse. They use every fucking chance they get to drag me back there in hope of encouraging me to "come to my senses"."

"Well, this is very disappointing," I said teasingly, "when am I going to get my present?"

Edward smiled, appreciating the poor attempt at humour, "I can give you yours before I leave, you could open in Christmas day." I started to nod before Edward shook his head with a frown, "No, that won't work. I want to see your face when you open it."

"You speak as if you already have it."

"No, I just know what I'm gonna get you. I was waiting to buy it later on so your snooping hands wouldn't come across it hidden in my closet or something."

I mocked indignation, "Me? Looking for my present? How dare you suggest I would do such a thing?"

Edward arched and eyebrow, "Says the girl who fucking hates surprises."

"I don't see the point!" I defended myself.

"The anticipation is the best part!"

"Err, no, the present is the best part. The anticipation is just irritating."

"Well, we'll agree to disagree, just don't tell me what my present is, please?" Edward said, ever the diplomat.

"And in return you can tell me now what you're gonna get me." I smirked.

Edward laughed before kissing my nose, chuckling as I wrinkled it. "Nice try but no chance."

"What about if I bribe you with sex?" I grinned, standing on my tiptoes to nibble his ear, running my finger up and down his chest and abs.

"You can try and see if it works," Edward suggested with a smirk.

I scoffed and threw his words back at him over my shoulder as I headed for the living room. "Nice try but no chance."

***FT***

Seth and I had been trailing around Port Angeles for well over three hours looking for Christmas presents. He was doing a good job, I however, had so far been unsuccessful.

"Are you gonna get presents for my mom or sister?" Seth asked.

I stared at him. "Are you trying to be funny?"

Seth chuckled, "I was just wondering. I just thought you might be, because if they get anything for you and you don't get anything for them Charlie's got another thing to bitch about."

I pursed my lips – the kid had a point. "I hate you when you're all practical, you're no fun."

He just laughed again.

"Well what the fuck am I supposed to get them?"

"Dunno. Mom likes cooking – maybe get her, like, a rolling pin or something."

I scoffed, "Ha! Oh, yeah, right! Here Sue, have a hard, heavy object from me, that way every time I piss you off, you can use it to bash my head in."

Seth laughed hard. "Okay, so maybe not a rolling pin."

"And why the hell would I get her anything to do with cooking aside from a book called "Cooking For Dummies" – the woman's food tastes like it's been poisoned. Mind you, I wouldn't put it past her."

Seth smirked, "You haven't had to live with it for fifteen years."

"You're right, I haven't, you've had the chance to build up a tolerance for it. Charlie and I are really fucking suffering."

"Okay…so maybe nothing to do with cooking."

"Good idea."

"What about Leah?"

"Dunno, a Justin Bieber CD?"

"Please don't, knowing her she'll end up liking it and I can't have her playing Justin Bieber in the house, my bedroom is right next to hers, you know."

I giggled, "Okay, so no Bieber fever."

"How about a book or something?"

I stopped and stared at Seth in shock, "Leah can _read_?!"

He rolled his eyes at me, "You're hilarious."

"Hmm," I murmured thoughtfully, "maybe there is a book I would be able to get her." The Karma Sutra popped into my head. It _was_ a picture book.

"What's that?"

I glanced at Seth with a smirk, "You don't want to know."

He eyed me curiously but trusted my judgement. Seth cleared his throat before asking awkwardly, "What, uh…what are you getting C-Cullen?"

"Urgh, I don't know! This is really stressing me out. He told me a couple of days ago that he knows what he's getting me and I don't have a fucking clue!" I had never been so nervous or stressed about buying somebody a present before. Not only was it due to the fact that he was my first real boyfriend, the first guy I had ever loved, that was adding to the pressure, but the thought that he was leaving soon kept me awake at night, and for some reason it was also adding to the stress of picking a present.

"Okay, calm down, what…um, what does…I dunno, what does he like?" I could see how awkward Seth was feeling about this conversation but I appreciated his efforts.

"He reads a lot, he writes a lot, he's pretty musical." I listed his interests.

"So…a…book?"

I rolled my eyes, "I can't get him a book, that's not very personal."

"So you want something personal?"

"Well yeah, I love the guy, I'm not gonna hand over a some random book like, "Merry Christmas, have fun reading!""

I looked over at Seth who had been quiet for a while, to see him staring at me, apparently speechless.

"What?"

"You…you love him?"

I hadn't even realised I had said it so it took me a while to understand what Seth was talking about. "Oh…I…well, yeah, I do."

Seth continued to stare for a while before he slowly nodded. "Okay. So not a book."

He attempted to give me some more ideas but I didn't think any of them would be right. Maybe the whole thing had to come from me, even the idea. Maybe that's just how it was, if the present was to be perfect. After all, Seth hardly knew him, and though I knew people who loved him – Esme surely would have loved to help – maybe it just wouldn't be absolutely perfect if it was completely and totally all me.

Speaking of Esme.

Seth and I had walked into a book shop – apparently he thought the whole "Cooking For Dummies" thing was actually a good idea, and would be able to pass off as a joke if Sue got offended.

There was some commotion going on at the back of the store and I heard some woman say to her friend, "Lawrence Dubios is doing a book signing!"

Lawrence Dubios. The name rang a bell. And then I remembered. Esme had been chattering on and on about him at Thanksgiving. He was some famous chef who was on T.V. and she absolutely loved him.

"Come on," I said to Seth, dragging him over to the line and grabbing one of his new cookbooks from a pile.

"Who is this guy?" He whispered, worried the chef – who was a good twenty meters away – would hear him.

"He's some famous chef, Esme loves him."

"Who's Esme?"

"Oh, she's Edward's aunt."

"Bella, I don't even get my own aunt a Christmas present."

"Well, technically she's his aunt, but she practically raised him – his parents are assholes. And Esme's really nice, I like her." I explained.

Ever since Thanksgiving, Esme had pretty much called me on a daily basis, even if it was just to gossip about Edward. Though I think she mainly did call for that reason, knowing I had no one else I could talk to about our relationship. I mean sure, Seth knew, but it was still a little weird for him considering Edward was his teacher. And the fact that he was guy. Though Rose was my best friend, this wasn't something I could talk to her about and Esme knew that.

We had gone out for coffee a couple of times as well. We had also attempted to head out for lunch but always ended up back at her and Carlisle's, eating her mouth-watering food while laughing over glasses of wine at Edward and Carlisle's expense – even when they weren't there.

Needless to say Esme and I had become very close. She was the mother I never had.

"Fair enough." Was his simple response.

When we finally got to the front of the queue the chef greeted us with a smile. "Hi there,"

"Hi," I smiled back politely. "This isn't actually for me, it's for a friend, she's a cook as well, and she loves you."

"A fellow chef, is she any good?" Lawrence Dubios beamed.

"One of the best," I told him, "Well, I was little late so her Thanksgiving dinner was cold but it was the best I've ever had."

"A talented chef, then. What's her name, hon?"

"Esme."

I passed him the book and he opened it, scribbling on the front page. "Christmas present?" He asked.

I nodded, "Yes, sir."

He handed the book back to me with a wink, "Have a good Christmas."

"Thank you, you too."

"Where are we headed now?" Seth asked once I had paid for the book and we left the store.

I pursed my lips. "Starbucks?"

He grinned, "Sounds good to me."

***FT***

"Have you said goodbye to Carlisle and Esme?" I forced myself to ask. I forced myself to speak, despite the fact that I thought I would be sick if I opened my mouth. We were at Edward's and he was leaving.

The day had come around so fucking fast and yet I knew it was going to feel like forever until he was back again.

We were stood in the hallway, his packed bag sitting on the floor by the door, sitting like a fucking weight on my chest.

Edward nodded, "They weren't happy when I told them."

"I'm not surprised," I murmured.

The words meant nothing, we had had this conversation already this morning, we were just putting off the inevitable.

Edward opened his arms. I flung myself into them, wrapping my own around his waist tightly, burying my face in his chest.

"I'm gonna miss you so much," he murmured against my hair.

I nodded, not trusting myself to say anything. I bit my lip, hoping the fucking tears wouldn't fall. He hadn't even left yet and I felt so fucking lost. This was going to be the worst Christmas ever.

"I'll be back before you miss me," he said.

I nodded again although we both knew it was bullshit. I was missing him already.

Edward pulled back a little, taking my face in his hands and pressing his lips to mine, it was slow and sensual yet desperate and longing. He kissed me again and again and again before tender kisses were placed to my forehead, eyelids, cheeks. He touched a final kiss to my nose, smiling weakly at the crinkling.

Bear was walking around our feet yapping.

Edward reluctantly pulled away before kneeling down to pet the puppy. He picked Bear up who began licking his face.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll miss you, too." Edward smiled. He scratched under Bear's chin. "You look after her."

He handed the puppy to me and I held Bear tight as Edward picked up his bag and opened the door. Out on the step he turned to face me giving me one last kiss. "Don't come outside, it's cold." I was shivering already as the December chill rushed into the house, breezing over my bare arms and feet.

He headed out to his car, throwing the bag into the boot. I didn't want to see this. I didn't want to watch him go.

Fuck, I wasn't ready for this.

Shit, I hadn't told him.

Dismissing my lack of shoes and coat I placed Bear on the floor, grabbed the spare key from the bowl and shut the door behind me before rushing outside.

Edward heard the door slam and looked up in time to see me running towards him. He came to meet me, catching me as I jumped, wrapping my legs around his waist, my hands running through his hair and my mouth locked with his. It was passionate, it was tender, it was everything.

"I love you," I breathed against his lips.

"I love you, Bella. So fucking much."

My forehead pressed to his. "Hurry back."

"Always." He murmured. He hugged me to him as I buried my face in his neck.

"Call me when you land."

He nodded.

"Promise you'll call me Christmas."

"I promise."

"I love you," I told him again.

He kissed my face all over before setting me down on the ground, he held my hand to his chest, the other stroking through my hair as his forehead was pressed once again to mine.

"Bella, if something happens at home, promise me you'll go to Carlisle and Esme's. I need to know you're with someone who will take care of you. Promise me."

I nodded, "Promise."

With one final kiss to the top of my head he turned me to face the front door, "Get your sexy ass back inside before it freezes off."

"We can't have that now, can we?"

"No we fucking can't." With a gentle but firm push I headed to the door after he whispered into my ear, "Love you, baby."

I didn't watch as he drove away.

My back slid down the closed door and I sat crouched in the empty hallway of the empty house, holding the puppy close to my chest.

I buried my face into Bear's fur and cried.

***FT***

"Bella, put the phone away," Charlie muttered from where he was sat next to me at the table.

We were spending Christmas Eve at Sue's parents house. They were nice – or rather her father was – her mother was too much like her and Leah to be considered nice. She didn't seem to care for me.

And that was fine. I really didn't give a shit. I didn't want to be there. I wanted to be at Edward's. Though he wasn't there I still wanted to just go curl up in his bed with Bear and read one of his favourite books.

He had called me as soon as he had landed in Chicago and hanging up the phone was almost as bad as saying goodbye to him earlier that night.

We had been texting all morning and though he was replying pretty quickly, that didn't stop me from checking my phone every five seconds.

I knew it was rude, especially sat at the dinner table, but I couldn't help it.

"Leave her be, Charlie," Pete, Sue's father, said, sending me a wink. "It's Christmas Eve, she's probably sending love notes to her boyfriend."

I was about to protest when Leah scoffed, "Bella doesn't have a boyfriend," then she muttered under her breath, "though that doesn't stop her from giving it out." Luckily no one but Seth and I heard her.

Bitch. She was one to fucking talk.

"What happened to Riley?" Charlie asked.

I frowned, "He was never my boyfriend, dad." I muttered.

"Well, either way put that phone away, it's rude."

I sighed, slipping my cell into my pocket.

By the time we got home I was fuming and beyond upset. Charlie had fucking taken my phone from me. I had a passcode on it so there was no way he could access it but I was still fucking angry. I had no way of contacting Edward – not even to let him know that I didn't have my phone.

Charlie had taken it after we had eaten. We were sat in the grandparents' living room and Dora – the step-grand-monster – had apparently been trying to get my attention as I was absorbed in my phone, reading a text from Edward.

Charlie said I could have it back after Christmas, to teach me the importance of "family".

My hands were shaking I was so upset – torn between anger and complete, overwhelming fucking despair.

I was glad I had an excuse to get out of the house. I was "dropping off presents to my friends".

I went to Edward's. Not only because I wanted to feel close to him but because I needed to see to Bear. I had meant to drop him off at Carlisle and Esme's this morning but the surprise trip to the Quileute reservation had been sprung on me and I couldn't think up an excuse fast enough.

I parked in the empty drive of Edward's house – the Jeep was in the garage and he had taken the Vanquish – before unlocking the door with the key Edward had given me.

I blindly threw the key into the bowl on the not-so-much-coffee-table coffee table only to hear it clatter to the floor. I looked down to see the table on it's side, the corners of it and the top scraped and chewed with teeth and claw marks. Fuck.

Bear shouldn't have been left alone so long what with him being so young. This was the result.

I sighed heavily as I knelt down to right the table, pulling it back onto its legs as I heard the quick padding of the puppy's feet running this way.

He started yapping when he saw me, rushing over to jump into my lap.

"What have you done, puppy?" I picked him up into my arms as I stood, cuddling him to me. I didn't have it in me to berate him. "Edward's gonna kill us, you know. For some unknown reason he fucking loves that table."

I headed to the kitchen as Bear licked at my face happily, his tail wagging. "I know, I'm happy to see you, too."

I kissed the top of his head before setting him down on the floor. I filled his water bowl and gave that to him, keeping him occupied as I cleaned up the newspaper we had put down my the back doors where he had done his business.

"You hungry, puppy?" I murmured, opening the cupboard where his food was kept. Propped up against his bag of food was a gold envelope. In the centre in Edward's elegant script was _"Open me when you need something to make you smile…"_.

I turned it round and began the peel at the fold and pulled out…a picture of a lobster.

Forget smiling, I fucking snorted!

But that wasn't all. Inside was also a picture of Renee Zellweger in a short glittery dress holding a gun. On a small torn sheet of lined paper secured to the picture with a paperclip were the words:

_I'm from Chicago. _

_Good movie._

_Yeah, I guess, if you're into all that jazz._

I bit my lip to keep from grinning like an idiot but I couldn't.

Inside I found another picture. Of…my panties…the ones I was wearing that first night, the ones I had slipped into his pocket at school. At the bottom was a small note. _I would have given you the real ones but I've got them with me ;)._

Sneaky bastard. I chuckled.

The last and final picture was of his ass. His tattooed ass! It had me laughing hard to the point I had tears in my eyes, especially at the note at the bottom of the picture: _Thought you might be missing it, now you can have it wherever you go!_

I noticed a small folded note – the last item in the evelope.

_It's funny I got a tattoo of a swan years before I met you. _He had written. _It was like I was waiting for you, like deep down I knew you were coming. My swan. _The tears began to well. Fuck. _You inspire me. I miss you, I'm thinking of you, I love you. Merry Christmas, baby._

Despite the tears, despite the fact I had no way of contacting Edward, I felt closer to him than I had all day. I had no idea how he had done it. He was over five hundred miles away and yet he had managed to calm me down, to soothe my anger, to fucking make me laugh when I had felt like doing anything but.

I gave Bear his food and headed into the living room, looking over the pictures and the notes, memorising them completely. I hummed in complete contentment, smiling at the Christmas tree Edward and I had put up last week. As I sat, basking in the moment of calm, I noticed the pack of cards, still on the coffee table from our game of Bullshit.

A thoughtful frown came across my face and I suddenly knew exactly what I was going to do for Edward for Christmas.

He had shown me in that envelope of treats that the most special gifts didn't have to cost a penny.

So I pulled off my jacket, kicked off my shoes, grabbed the pack of cards and scoured the house for all of Edward's favourite books. I was gonna fix his destroyed table, and it was gonna look even better than it had before.

***FT***

Once I was done, I crammed Bear's crate into the truck, along with his food and everything Carlisle and Esme were going to need for the next couple of days.

I quickly wrote their gift tags and stuck them onto their wrapped presents.

Esme's read: _Merry Christmas! I hope you enjoy this. He said you sounded very talented – that should make more sense when you open the gift. Thank you for everything. Love Bella x_

Carlisle's was a little different. _For Carlisle, Merry Christmas! This isn't much but Edward said you were looking for one for your desk. Love Bella x_

I made sure I had the envelope Edward had left for me tucked securely away in my bag before heading for the Cullen's.

Esme greeted me with a hug, despite the fact I held a puppy in my arms.

"Bella, how lovely to see you. We were expecting you sooner, dear."

"I know, I'm sorry about that." I explained to her about the surprise trip to the Reservation as we sat in the living room.

I admired the decoration and the Christmas tree. Everything was so beautiful.

"Don't worry about it, sweetie, Carlisle and I weren't busy today, just been baking and preparing for tomorrow. Christmas music has been on, the eggnog was spiked by my dear husband and it went a little to his head, he attempted to dance."

We laughed at Carlisle's expense. We watched Bear for a little while as he sniffed around, exploring the new environment. Well, I thought we had been watching Bear – Esme, apparently, had been watching me.

"How are you, Bella?" She asked, though her voice was laced with much more meaning than the light, innocent question usually would have reflected.

I darted my eyes away from her concerned gaze, "I'm okay." But being around Esme just seemed to bring all my burdens back to the forefront of my mind. I bit my trembling lip.

"Sweetie?" She asked softly, her hand reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

When I glanced back up at her warm, worried eyes the tears in my own began to fall.

"Oh, Bella," she breathed pulling me into her safe embrace. "Tell me, sweetie, tell me everything."

So I did. I told her how Charlie had confiscated my phone, how fucked up I always felt around this time of year wondering what my mother and sister were doing, whether they thought about me at all with at least a single kind thought, wondering if they missed me even a little bit. Because these were thoughts that plagued me every fucking year. I had never allowed myself to break down before but Edward's absence had put me under too much strain and I couldn't take it.

"I miss him so much," I sobbed as she rubbed my back soothingly, "I miss him and I can't even tell him, I can't even talk to him about any of this because I have no way of contacting him." I shook my head, angry at myself. "I thought I was okay. I found this envelope he had left for me and I felt so much better but seeing you and…" I trailed off but Esme nodded in understanding, stroking my hair.

"Seeing me has brought back all thoughts of your mother." She said softly.

I nodded, pulling away a little, "Not that I didn't want to see you, I did-"

"Shhh, it's okay, I understand, sweetie." She wiped the tears from my cheeks. "I know how difficult it is. Special occasions were hard times for me after everything that happened between my mother and my sister. There were times not even Carlisle could make me feel better – to say Edward's doing that for you all the way from Chicago must be something, right?"

She smiled and I could help the single laugh that escaped me as I nodded.

"My situation may not be the best example, Bella, my mother and I never really properly fixed everything before she passed away, but that was partly my fault – I never allowed myself to forgive her. But you, Bella, there's something about you that has me believing things for you will get better."

I looked at her in question.

"You have this quiet strength about you that I didn't have when I was your age. I don't know, maybe it's the strength you need to forgive your mother and sister. I'm not sure, but what I am certain of is that you'll get through this much better than I did because you are surrounded by people who love you."

I stared at Esme, startled, who laughed at the look of surprise on my face.

"You didn't think Edward was the only one who loved you, now, did you? You're a part of this family now, Bella. Carlisle and I seem to be making it a habit of claiming children as our own but we do love you like you were our own."

I hugged Esme tightly, knowing nothing else to say but, "Thank you."

"Don't thank me, dear, loving you is easy. There is nothing to thank me for."

I hugged her tighter saying in response, "I got you and Carlisle Christmas presents," as though that would suffice as a thank you.

Esme laughed, "That's sweet of you. We have one for you, too."

"You didn't have to-" I tried, but Esme gave me a firm look.

"Nor did you."

And nothing else was said on the matter.

I didn't open my present and neither did they. We were going to save them for tomorrow, but they did offer me one gift today and it was the best gift of all.

They gave me a way of contacting Edward.

I didn't have his number memorised so I hadn't been able to call him, but they gave me his number from their address book meaning I was able to ring him from Seth's phone.

I thought I would have felt despaired again to leave Esme and Carlisle's only to head back home, but much like Edward's envelope, the visit had made me happier and more content than I had felt this morning.

I was smiling as I dove home, Edward's envelope and cell phone number sitting snuggly in my bag.

* * *

**Pictures of Edward's envelope and things can be found on my blogger.**

**A lot of people have been asking why Bella doesn't just move out - she is eighteen after all. Well, as always, there is a reason for it and you will all find out in either chapter sixteen or seventeen...haven't decided which yet :P **

**Review :) **


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